Review Summary: A complete waste of sixteen minutes and twenty-nine seconds of your life. Please avoid this, as I should have done.
4 of 4 thought this review was well written
Every so often, we dive into the unexpected in music, right? We go buy (or otherwise acquire) a new album by a band we’ve never heard before, right? Sure, you might research them a bit, see if it will fit your tastes and whatnot, but the band is still vague to imagine. That’s how I found Orthrelm, an Avant-Garde Metal/Experimental act hailing from the D. C. area. Browsing through the Metal Archives’ Progressive section, I decided it might be worth to check out some Avant-Garde as well. As such, when I found Orthrelm, I thought this would be cool, atmospheric, heavy music. But I can tell you; I’ve never felt so fruitless with music before.
A noisy, directionless, mindless sixteen and a half minute ‘jam’ is what Orthrelms’ first album, Iorxhscimtor, is all about. There is little to say about the album, because it doesn’t have much. Pale and boring, repetitive, random leads courtesy of guitarist Mick Barr are what make up one-half of the album. The other half, Josh Blair, is on drums, and he’s just as ludicrous; unchecked spasms of wild cymbal hits and drum beats that are not forming anything lasting complete all that there is to this freakshow, Iorxhscimtor.
But the travesty of the music is nothing compared to the overall ‘imagination’ of this album. The shortest song is twenty-three seconds, while, in stark contrast; the longest track is two minutes and twenty-two seconds. But don’t think this is some Grindcore, face ripping nuclear bomb as some bands do. No blast beats of any kind, no punishing riffs, no vocals; just a simple combination of recapitulated solos and utterly unmindful drums that severely lacks any mental or physical work.
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, there is nothing solid on this album. No melodies, verses, choruses, bridges, no anything besides the lazy ‘songwriting’ of annoying, I’ve-already-heard-this-a-thousand-times-before shred leads and unimaginative, rehashed drums. Don’t get me wrong, Mick and Josh are good at their instruments, but could do so much more when they actually put their effort in. Yet with a sixteen-minute album that’s as repetitive as your generic Nickelback, with all your song titles being ‘Untitled’, and nothing behind your music besides sweep arpeggios, people will avoid any more Orthrelm albums at all costs.
Feel free to explain, please...because it's not so much that I don't understand, it's more that my friend's cat could play this drunk. In fact, I think that's what this sounds like. Drunken cat music...if you can even call it music...
Is that insulting enough for you? ;)
The REALLY funny thing is, I've heard worse. This Message Edited On 01.17.08
obviously, you don't get the point of the music at all.
it is meant to be as abrasive as you say. in the little nuances of the guitar riffs there are melodies. its taking the ideas of minimalist composition and applying them in a heavy metal setting, that is why it is brilliant. sure, this record doesn't do it as successfully as their masterpiece 'Ov' which is basically an ever evolving 60 minute track that takes the idea of 'Strumming Music' and applies it in a metal setting, but that doesn't warrant the complete distaste of it.
the band isn't into blast beats, shredding, etc. its into complete compositions and thats what makes it music.
Listen to Moonsorrow. They make complete compositions. If you actually enjoy this, good for you. I do not, cannot, will not, and it has nothing to do with my taste in my music. It hurts my ears. It annoys me. It bores me. I could go on, but I've no desire to continue bashing something that you like. To each their own. Just don't tell me I don't comprehend the idea of complete compositions. I insulted your music. You insulted me.