Review Summary: Audiopain shows us how not to write thrash. Thank you Audiopain!
2 of 2 thought this review was well written
Maybe it’s the same riff used 20-times throughout one song, or maybe it’s the vocalist who sounds like someone took a spork and carved up his vocal chords, or it could even be the fact that these guys are just boring as hell to listen to…really, it’s up to which choice you make about Audiopain. No matter what pushes your reasoning however, the same conclusion exists at the end of every path: these guys suck. Formed in Norway in ’98, Audiopain are one of the many retro-thrash bands that attempt to bring back the glory days. However, unlike most bands like Nocturnal Breed who turn to the more black metal roots present in Sodom and Kreator, Audiopain thought it would be a great idea to bring back the “punkish” feel to thrash, to make it energetic and fun all over again.
Good idea on paper, horrible when played out, sadly.
If anything saves this “The Switch to Turn off Mankind” from being a 26 minute complete suck-fest, it’s the surprisingly solid opener “Hellbound”, but that’s only because it’s the first song so you haven’t listened to that one riff, oh about 200 times by the end of the album. Thrash is a repetitive genre by nature, especially since most of the original ideas were all used after about the first five albums, but at least most thrash bands nowadays have some kind of variation in their music. That’s what Audiopain lacks…well that and actually being good. Every riff is bland, every drum beat unmotivated, and nearly every ***ing screech that Sverre Dæhli makes is more painful than watching your parents engage in sex.
Yeah, there’s thrash riffs here, and there is that energetic, punk-feel from the early days of the genre. It’s just that after the first 5 seconds of each song, save “Hellbound”, it’s not enough to hold a listener in. “Termination Fields”, while ultimately being ruined by irritating vocals, tries to be a bit different with slower riffs that center around quick fills…but this just makes it worse. It sounds exactly the same as the tracks before it, but this time it’s got a plodding feel to it which makes it about as enjoyable as sticking your head between a door and slamming it shut multiple times. “Alliance” and “Cobra Dance” (which is such a sweet name, but hey, it sucks too) should’ve just made into one song, since the riffs are so gosh darn similar.
Instead of the headbanging, fist-pumping intensities that can be found on your normal thrash album, Audiopain’s “The Switch to Turn off Mankind” has no kind of rush to it. Yeah, it’s fast…but fast doesn’t mean that it’ll cause whiplash to metal-goers. Audiopain, mainly Sverre who is also the guitarist, just didn’t seem to put a lot of power into these songs. “Hellbound”, as mentioned earlier, is a solid tune, but even that doesn’t possess the cut-throat mentality of most thrash metal. What you get instead is a lack luster, I-still-live-with-my-mom (grrr!) type attitude that gets these songs going nowhere.
Nothing on this album, however, comes close to the complete level of utter crap that the title track reaches. I guess Audiopain got this great idea that slowing down at the end of a song would make it eerie and mysterious, so they went ahead and did it. The song actually is almost decent up until about 2:35, when they decided to slow everything down to a single guitar lead over feedback. The result was contemplation of suicide from metal heads across the globe. It sounds like someone recorded this part over a computer microphone. When it does kick back in, you still have to put up with gargled vocals that sound like they came from a frog as Sverre boasts about ruling the switch to turn off mankind.
God damn you Audiopain. Of all the emerging thrash bands hell-bent on reviving the genre, you somehow landed a label. Record companies are a bit of a weird business, but seriously, come on. This is up there with the level of crap that Deathchain put out with “Cult of Death” (but that album sucks more because Deathchain was capable of doing better). As far as I know, Audiopain has been consistently crappy, and I don’t want to delve into their past release. If you ever see this, stay the *** away from it and go curb-stomp the record store owner for actually carrying it.
Overall rating – 1.5/5
Don’t ever listen to anything else if you value your ears.
An album for raw thrash fanatics only. Not for weak pussies! As with the other uberthrash bands, this is just aggressive all the way through, and way too far away from the mainstream for normal wankers to grab. An awsome kick in the ass!!
Nope, but my impression is that it is actually you that have that different opinion. Most reviewers salute it, as far as I've read. Anyway, this is a matter of taste and choise. If you are looking for bands without similarities to other bands, metal in general is no place to be... Especially thrash! And in this point of view I don't share your views either. This is waaay more original than the new breed of thrash that is coming now, which is just copying old standard thrash.
I would be happy to hear which bands you think is better that sounds like this. And I'm not talking about thrash in general, but grim, raw, ugly thrash like Nifelheim, Aura Noir, Destruktor etc.
I've been reviewing for two years. This is my opinion on the band, and I backed it up fairly well IMO. I think it sucks.
In response to Rawar, Aura Noir is pretty solid, ever hear Gospel of the Horns? They can get pretty repetitive, but they're a fun time.
Hey fuck stick, the "Is this review well-written yes/no" option isn't supposed to be based on whether or not you agree with the rating. If I backed up my reasons with evidence, which I did you twat, then you don't neg vote it. In fact, don't vote at all. You're a one-time poster so fuck off and take your shitty Audiopain with you. Motherfucker.
Dude you don't think I know Sabbat? Are you fucking for real? My opinion is that this is shit you dumb-ass fanboy.
Back up your vote right now. If what you say makes sense, which I doubt, I'll go through and edit it.
And btw, by you giving this a 5, you put it up there with classics such as "South of Heaven" and "Powerslave". If you really think this album stands side-by-side with those two, then fine, keep your rating (especially if you plan on sticking around), but you might want to reconsider how high you rated it.
And obviously you and Rawar are both from the same forum, so which one?This Message Edited On 12.12.07
You might want to consider minding your own business. I consider this one of the best albums by Audiopain and thus it get superb score. I also rated the Agalloch album a 5 as well.
As I said read your review and then read the decibel one, it's quite simple to see who gets paid to write reviews and who doesn't. To be quite honest, I could easily find a bad review on Decibel as well of another band (sorry no bad reviews of audiopain there) and give you an idea of how to write a good review of what you might consider a bad album. As I said take a journalism class.
Superb is a 4.5 by Sputnik's standards. I was just saying that if you plan on sticking around, then be mindful of what you rate as classics. Not only will the system not allow to rate more than 10% of your album selection as classics (unless they changed it), but it doesn't reflect well on your objectivity on viewing albums.
I openly offered to accept any advice from you on what to do to make my review better, and you failed to do that. According to your logic, people who write reviews and get paid for it, say for IGN, know music better (which is retarded).
If you think I should take a journalism class, then obviously you already have. So go through this, quote me where I'm wrong, tell me what I can do to make it better, and I will.
Rawar, Nifelheim is pretty good :thumb:
Not a big fan of Toxic Holocaust however...I heard a new track by Dead to this World a few weeks ago and it kicked my ass. Don't know Witchtrap though, but that EP they just released looks promising.This Message Edited On 12.12.07