artificialbox: roasted for having no friends

artificialbox 12.02.22	thanks for reading my emo tumblr post. list is digs.
MarsKid 12.02.22	Sounds like things are going well for you! And having a lot of friends isn't always good; better to have a good circle of people you love and support and who do the same for you.
MetalMarcJK 12.02.22	better to have a good circle of people you love and support and who do the same for you. [2]
InfernalDeity 12.02.22	Im the same way dude. I have two friends that I keep in contact with, but im not super intentional when it comes to reaching out. I am perfectly comfortable entertaining myself with my hobbies and sharing memories with my girl. Nothing wrong with that.
deathschool 12.02.22	Get off the internet and meet me at the bus station. It’s not that hard.
zaruyache 12.02.22	was it cum town
Sinternet 12.02.22	it was actually the adam friedland show
chemicalmarriage 12.02.22	Meet me under the bridge. We'll party
Colton 12.02.22	damn your gf kinda bodied you ngl. get back at her and tell her astrology's not real or something
zaruyache 12.02.22	rearrange all her crystals without telling her, throw off all her vibrations.
MoM 12.02.22	But the kundalini!!! 😦
unclereich 12.02.22	break up with her and date men like I did
Supercoolguy64 12.02.22	fellow spectrum inhabitant?
Trebor. 12.02.22	my gf makes fun of me when I listen to cum town too
artificialbox 12.02.22	lol you guys. I didn't know about cumtown until after Stavvy quit to make it big time, otherwise I probably would have loved that pod. I just listen to a lot of H3 and Bad Friends/Tigerbelly/Whisky Ginger also yeah you're right I think I have to take drastic measures here and do something HORRIBLE... like unplug her lava lamp >:) @supercoolguy thats highly possible but at this point in my life, a diagnosis wouldn't do much for me
artificialbox 12.02.22	and yes I do have it pretty good. Sometimes I get sad when I see some of my pals go on a hike without inviting me or some shit... but not getting invited to things is just a consequence of my personality, and if I want to be included more then it's up to me to put myself out there. I think people just assume I'd rather be left alone (which is USUALLY correct)
unclereich 12.02.22	h3 is brutal
artificialbox 12.02.22	it’s not for everyone thats for sure
anode 12.02.22	Bra you sound very similar to one of my friends. I never understand why responds seriously to our jokes and shittaking haha
botb 12.02.22	Just cause you like podcasts doesn’t make you antisocial tbh, they can be very fun
artificialbox 12.02.22	don’t take my snowflakery away from me
MarsKid 12.02.22	Podcasts and other long-form media that basically boils down to someone or multiple people talking can be real comforting when you're alone. Sometimes I just need some noise in the apartment when I'm cooking or just sitting around. "thats highly possible but at this point in my life, a diagnosis wouldn't do much for me" Could always inform you more about yourself. I'm very much in the same boat, honestly; have had the suspicion I am on the spectrum for years, mostly due to social awkwardness/properly reading people/etc.
artificialbox 12.02.22	Yeah the pods really help keep my mind from spiralling when I’m alone. I think boredom is the single biggest crux to my mental health, so I have to make sure I’m constantly entertained by something.
anode 12.02.22	On that note, the best thing I’ve ever found to keep my sanity at work is xfm ricky gervais radio show. Funniest most pointless shit ever. If anyone does take my advice, I suggest starting in season 2
el_newg 12.02.22	I reckon a lot of people on sput feel a very similar way, myself included. check Leighton Night podcast if you are taking recs.
artificialbox 12.02.22	anode I’ll defs check that out. I was always a fan of Ricky but I didn’t know he had a radio show. I’ll take you up on that rec too, newg. Just checked their bio and it seems up my alley.
anode 12.02.22	It may help out with your filtering of sarcasm because I don’t think there’s a serious or nonironic statement made in the whole series from ricky or steve
botb 12.02.22	We’re living in the ADD/ADHD Renaissance. We’re constantly overly stimulated to try and avoid dealing with being in our own heads. Podcasts are excellent for that haha
artificialbox 12.02.22	amen to that brother
anode 12.02.22	Yeah botb it makes me think previous generations must have had much better mental health by definition just because they had to spend more time with themselves and get used to it
artificialbox 12.02.22	Haha I don’t know, I think they may have just better at repressing their emotions and not talking about it cause they were busy like… fighting wars and inventing airplanes. Also most of gthe older people in my family are alcoholics and 2 of em died from suicide and a stress related heart attack.
anode 12.02.22	Lmao yeah that’s the other side of the coin for sure
artificialbox 12.02.22	in general though I do think spending most of your childhood outdoors and away from technology is PROBABLY good for your brain
MarsKid 12.02.22	There was likely a lot of psychological damage/issues from the Covid years that we are only now beginning to see, especially with kids. That hurt a lot of development emotionally and in education.
robertsona 12.02.22	I have crazy amounts of friends and each of them is performing at a crazy high rate
GhandhiLion 12.02.22	fellow spectrum inhabitant? [2] Masking is exhausting. Parasocial relationships are not inherently a bad thing but they usually are.
MarsKid 12.02.22	I have no doubt that there are plenty of peeps out there doing well, but I do think there are a lot of others, specifically teenagers and younger, who had a rough go of it.
artificialbox 12.02.22	thats awesome robert, i’m happy for you and your high performing friends
Deathconscious 12.02.22	I have two friends lol, and i dont live in the same state as one of them anymore.
anode 12.02.22	I agree mars if this happened to me when I was in school or college I’d be pissseddd
Colton 12.02.22	tell your gf all the crime TV she watches hasn't manifested in any actual knowledge of law enforcement or forensics and she would be no more capable of getting away with murder than anyone else
Demon of the Fall 12.02.22	fellow spectrum inhabitant? [3] Masking is exhausting. absolutely, I can relate to a lot of the above and sometimes you just have to do what's best for yourself. Having some low-maintenance friends is great, as long as they understand you don't always want to be socialising in groups much (if at all). That shit is exhausting, especially as you age (annoyingly). A couple of close friends is all you really need, in an ideal world. Now, I'm struggling even to maintain that. Sometimes my family are difficult to be around in all honesty. Fortunately, I have my wife, who's the only person I can actually spend prolonged periods with, without feeling like my brain is imploding, lol
MarsKid 12.02.22	I love hanging out in a good group, but I also like a good recharge period just chilling alone, writing and drawing and jamming to tunes. Very relaxing.
Colton 12.02.22	yeah I don't think introverted or extraverted, love just doing my own thing and never get lonely but also love a good conversation and I've always found it easy to connect with ppl
Colton 12.02.22	honestly most people just want to be listened to and don't even care what you say, if you just listen to them, be engaged and ask questions here and there people will love you
artificialbox 12.02.22	Colton that is honestly what most of my friendships are based on hahah. I’m basically the friend group therapist. It does get a little tiring but I’m also really glad that people feel comfortable confiding in me.
Colton 12.02.22	you gotta have a balance there, so you can listen to people and engage with what they say but also have ppl listen and respect what you have to say
anode 12.02.22	Yeah that sounds nice Colton but how can you replicate that in practice when the societal norms for initial interaction is small talk and boring af. And then if you breach that most people look at you like wtf? I wanted to talk about my weekend and how my day has been even though I’m the most boring person on planet earth
Colton 12.02.22	small talk doesn't always have to be boring. but also you gotta be able to elevate small talk to medium talk sometimes without going all the way to big talk
Colton 12.02.22	I find the concept of "small talk" kinda weird to be honest. just because you're talking about common aspects of daily life doesn't mean it's a "small" conversation cause there's a lot of meaning in that stuff as well. it's what a large chunk of our lives revolves around
anode 12.02.22	I usually throw up in my mouth at “how are you doing” and then I’m out lol I will say at bars people are more willing to do medium talk cause it’s already so contrived to go up and talk to somebody you gotta spice it up
anode 12.02.22	It’s the fact that it’s a large chunk of what our lives revolve around that makes it boring to me
artificialbox 12.02.22	using small talk to segway into deeper topics is a learned skill that I’m pretty well versed in lol. Colton is right about not always going too deep with it off the bat tho, you gotta gauge the situation cause some people get really weird talking about personal stuff.
anode 12.02.22	Yeah I just suck at it maybe that’s why I don’t like it. I’m like allergic to anything that feels disengenuine it’s really strange
Hyperion1001 12.02.22	damn dude ur partner sounds kinda shitty.
MarsKid 12.02.22	Damn, I usually always ask how someone is because I genuinely want to know if they're having a good day or not lol
anode 12.02.22	So that’s fine for people you have rapport with. Like one of my close friends who I find super interesting I always ask him what he’s done today cause I just like listening to him. Or like coworkers I like I’ll ask how they doing. But if its a stranger, everyone expects the answer to “how are you doing” to be “good” so what’s the fucking point? And then if I don’t say “how are you” back what am I the asshole? Cause I’ve been told that’s the case
artificialbox 12.02.22	Hyperion I probably made it sound worse than it was, but it was genuinely just friendly ribbing. Being able to roast your partner and laugh about it is an essential part of any strong relationship imo
MarsKid 12.02.22	I'm just laser-focused on mental health, so I always want a genuine answer even if it means someone saying they aren't having a good day. Obviously that's not normal/I can't and don't expect strangers or people I don't know well to answer honestly, but I want to at least set the expectation and demonstrate that I do care, since showing that + listening to people (as Colton said) can truly make someone's day.
Colton 12.02.22	another thing to remember is that how you say things matters a lot more than what you say. being mindful of your tonality is very helpful
Hyperion1001 12.02.22	“Hyperion I probably made it sound worse than it was” yeah I get that, it does read a little shitty but I can see how it’s just ribbing. don’t let anyone make fun of you for what makes you happy tho.
anode 12.02.22	If I’m in a shitty mood I’ll prob come off as cold and distant. If I’m in a good mood I’ll prob come off as nice and amicable. It’s got nothing to do with the other person so idk how it could be taken badly. I would expect the same from anybody else. But anyway starting to feel like a bitter cunt debating this so I’m cool with dropping it lol
robertsona 12.02.22	I feel like I was really awkward until almost legit this year but I dont know what changed. I'll have to think. I'm very social now. lots of things that normal people can manage give me great anxiety but I am really good at, and don't at all mind, public speaking which is funny
robertsona 12.02.22	a lot of is kinda the jazz improv principle of well if you hit the wrong note you're of necessity one half step away from one that's gonna sound good in the key you chose (yknow. almost always). the verb I think of is "folding things in". it sounds like this awful sisyphean thing but I think that helps me, is little acts of bouncing back. incorporating your idiosyncrasies. making them intentional. whos to say. all love
artificialbox 12.02.22	I love that analogy
artificialbox 12.02.22	I’m still awkward but the only thing that changed is I don’t feel anxious about it anymore. I have become really comfortable just being the silent one in the group or straight up just leaving a gathering if I feel uncomfortable hahaha
robertsona 12.02.22	trust me that I go as crazy with the unintuitive analogies in real life as I do on here it's just about stuff that isn't music. also love little stupid absurdist reversals. not a particularly good example but today I texted someone about two cats "they're so small together" and realized how dumb that putatively cute sentiment sounded so I was like "they're smaller together than they are individually" see it doesnt make any sense thats hilarious. I think I'm pretty good at being precise with language I guess and that that makes it hit. I also do a lot of weird emphasize-my-neuroses kind of lil theatrical things also you gotta incorporate like 15% homer simpson too. there's this episode I just watched where he asks marge to apologize to the tv for some reason. "don't you owe someone a little apology?" need that.
robertsona 12.02.22	I am also a high school teacher though, gotta put on a show gotta say stuff
anode 12.03.22	Having said all that there was a nice black lady at the gas station who said how’re you doing and I naturally said good thanks how’re you? And it was a very nice interaction lmao
artificialbox 12.03.22	Thats nice. Yesterday I went to the grocery story and thought I heard the cashier say “how was your day” so I said “not bad” and then the cashier said “oh I didnt say anything” and I said “oh…”. It was the cashier behind her that said it but I couldn’t tell cause she was wearing a mask.
MoM 12.03.22	“love little stupid absurdist reversals. “gotta incorporate like 15% homer simpson too” [2] Relatable.
Mort. 12.03.22	fellow spectrum inhabitant? [100000] buddy this is one of the most stereotypical descriptions of being on the spectrum ive ever heard.
Mort. 12.03.22	i am friend to all i love every sput user except for like 3 of us and i might be on the spectrum too, this list closely resembles myself, hope youre doing well bro
artificialbox 12.03.22	omg i never though about my username being interpreted as a pocket p***y before, that’s great. thanks guys
Colton 12.03.22	johnny’s saviour complex extends beyond just referring to McDonald’s as Makudonarudo and bowing to the girl who gives him his quarter pounder in order to save Japanese culture, and also includes preemptive judgements about people’s usernames that expose the inner workings of his own mind more than anything else
MoM 12.03.22	Wait, I thought Johnny was referring to Mort with “ up until now i had read your username as a crass sex toy reference, but having read this list, that does not seem to be your vibe and i have fucked up. apologies!” That explains a whole lot. I spent good few minutes trying to work that one out
Demon of the Fall 12.03.22	‘I'm just laser-focused on mental health, so I always want a genuine answer even if it means someone saying they aren't having a good day‘ Yeah, that’s cool, but the majority of people really don’t, they just say the ‘necessary pleasantries’. I think it depends, if a genuine friend who understands really wants to know, then let them have it. My wife has filtered her friendships pretty ruthlessly using this method! Lol. Whereas I’m really quite terrible at admitting these things, even to those I’m closest with. A very common problem with men in general, I think (and in my case it’s weird, because I’m certainly not against being seen as vulnerable).
robertsona 12.03.22	Hey Colton, why are you being so annoying?
Mort. 12.04.22	he seems to drift in and out of being really annoying
AlexKzillion 12.04.22	plain english with derek thompson has become one of my favorite pods as of late. he did an episode called "why america has a crisis of masculinity" a couple months ago and it touched on the subject of males in particular becoming increasingly more socially isolated pretty in depth among other things, figured maybe some of you all might find it interesting (and despite what a title like that might imply, its def not some incel bitchfest lol, actually very nuanced with a lot of studies cited). one of the very very few episodes of any podcast that's actually stuck with and resonated with me beyond a couple hours
Colton 12.04.22	cuz it's johnny duh srsly though automatically thinking of a pocket pussy when you see the username ArtificialBox is kind of a self report and makes it funny that he was the one judging him for it
Colton 12.04.22	listen to weyes blood i wanna see if it filters you
Colton 12.04.22	i'm fuckin a cop
Colton 12.04.22	also listen to Natalia Lafourcade
MoM 12.04.22	WHY CAN’T WEEE BE FRIENDS?
artificialbox 12.04.22	and if you can’t get laid, get yourself an artificial box
MoM 12.04.22	Or put your hands on your shoulders, take a deep breath, and remind yourself “It’s all good”
Colton 12.04.22	you mean like a vacuum cleaner?
artificialbox 12.04.22	consider my mind blown
MoM 12.04.22	Wait. Artificial box = Artificial brain? 😧