costofnothing: Music, personality, other people

philbert08 08.03.20	I'd say it depends on the person. If all you do listen to is really angry/heavy music, it could be a sign of emotional suppression, but don't quote me. I'm no therapist. I love me some metalcore, deathcore and hardcore at times but not as much as I got older. I am in a better place mentally the last few years but I don't want to mix correlation with causation. With the music above, you'd definitely like Ruby Haunt. It's soft emo dream-pop goodness. Start off the with EP "Bully" and move into his other albums Blue Hour and The Middle of Nowhere.
costofnothing 08.03.20	What you say about emotional suppression really gets me thinking, in that middle and high school were rough for me, and I think angry/heavy music was kind of a form of catharsis, but part of me wonders if it stunted my ability to understand and deal with my own emotions. And thanks, will check out.
philbert08 08.03.20	Yeah a lot of the time anger is a more acceptable emotion for men and so we find ways mentally to express other more taboo emotions like sadness, guilt, shame, etc through it. You can definitely learn how to express those in a healthy way. I've been in therapy for a few years and that's the only place I feel comfortable expressing shame and sadness (other than the really sad music I like).
JeremiahBullfrog 08.03.20	Listening to angry music helps me chill tf out
Colton 08.03.20	Pup is pretty pissed off and intense tbh
LeddSledd 08.03.20	I can relate somewhat. Enjoying a lot more extreme or experimental music has made me more withdrawn about myself because of how negatively others could potentially react. I've tried testing the waters with family and friends and, aside from my closer ones with more open music taste, their reactions are usually pretty negative to even the tamer material. I don't consider myself an angry or confused person before or as a result of extreme music but it's definitely made me less open about myself. I figure that's why I like coming to forums like Sputnik to discuss subjects I enjoy.
notagenius 08.03.20	People who love horror movies are usually living happier lives because they don't actually know what pain and fear is. But the kind of music that sounded pleasant and cheerful (like early New Orleans jazz) sprang up among hard-working labors and downtrodden people. Because there was less hope in real life. therefore I am fully aware that the choices of music moods can be diametrically opposed to the main personality. (But this has the premise of really making the music functional for oneself.) A lot of people use music as a mean of personal adornment, they don't really like music, but they need to like something for social purposes, so the music's not going to do anything for them anyways.
Colton 08.03.20	Luckily I like rap so I can talk about music with most people since that’s the only genre 95+% of young people listen to
costofnothing 08.03.20	@ColeT Yeah, Pup definitely isn't chill but they are nowhere near as intense and abrasive as something like Nails or Cursed
Asdfp277 08.03.20	My music doesn't make me angry -- regardless of genre, it tends to have a calming effect. I think people gravitate towards angry music because it calms them, it's not the music that creates angry people. I don't have awkward interactions with other people relating to music unless they specifically ask me to check my weird music, because they know I can listen to stuff that's like, beyond radio pop/rock (lol). Even then, it's not as awkward because they knew it was gonna be awkward. I listen to normal music too tho, so maybe i'm cheating
costofnothing 08.03.20	@LedSledd I get that a lot, my parents and even some friends would always judge me for listening to that kind of music, and attach all kinds of negative stereotypes for it. I remember when I was 14 my mother calling an Amon Amarth song "demonic" or throughout all of high school people I knew saying metal/hardcore was what people with issues listened to.
ChoccyPhilly 08.03.20	short answer: no Long answer: Thankfully my taste is diverse enough and I happily adapt to who I'm with. Was with a friend yesterday and we jammed Zedd, Avicii and The Wanted and I was loving it. However, i do often pick songs during a party that i know maybe a couple of us will like. Definitely been kicked off playlist duty for playing hardcore techno when the vibe was more around ABBA. I'm a lot more ok with my music taste these days and happily admit to my friends I like what I like. If someone wants to engage in a music conversation, I perk up and get drawn to it. Was at a group dinner once and I interrupted a couple of blokes because they were discussing if silence was music and I couldn't not get involved. More importantly, all of my good friends are friends first. I've never been able to develop a strong friendship if i meet someone through music so I've stopped expecting my friends to meet my music needs and that's why I suffer on this website. But i get very passionate on club nights. I refuse to go to shitty throwback cheesy pop nights and keep begging my friends to go to techno, d&b nights and they keep saying no. It's annoying but i get over it.
costofnothing 08.03.20	@choccyphilly I've heard from friends really into techno how its actually hard to get their friends into it because it isn't that similar to pop-edm or very popular artists that make that kind of music
LeddSledd 08.03.20	@Choccy out of curiosity, which hardcore techno? If you have any specific recs
ChoccyPhilly 08.03.20	Honestly techno is more similar to metal because it's cavernous, heavy, dark and very atmosphere driven. To most people, it's just the same beat with no melody for hours but they'd probably say the same about Black Metal too
ChoccyPhilly 08.03.20	@ledd https://mainmiserecords.bandcamp.com/album/comittee-of-chaos Here's my most recent listen. Check dotwav Or if you want something a bit more instant: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3ywfIpdFe4Y
Shuyin 08.03.20	Its scientifically proven that aggressive music has a calming effect on the individual, students who listen to Metal or Rock tend to have higher grades too according to studies
LeddSledd 08.04.20	@Shuyin While I really want that to be true, that sounds too good to be true
evilford 08.04.20	Pretty much exclusively listen to dm and everyone I know tells me I'm the chillest person they know. Not bragging, I just think it speaks to the propensity of angry/heavy music to be cathartic and actually relaxing in reality
ChoccyPhilly 08.04.20	I know some thrash heads who are absolute cunts and have no chill. However, never met a DM/BM fan who wasn't chill but this is far from a scientific sample size
Shuyin 08.04.20	Yea, I had people telling me they wished to be as calm as I am and they got surprised when I told them that I listen mostly to Heavy Metal and Rock @LeddSledd I'm sure I saw the report on the IFL Science website, but can't find it now
dannooo28 08.04.20	Out of all of my friends, I’m the one that’s in the calmest state most times. Out of them, I’m also the one who listens to the most “negative”/aggressive music. I listen to a wide variety but the heavier stuff brings me the most peace for whatever reason, I think a part of why I like it the most is that I play drums so more aggressive music is naturally more fun to play/listen to for me. It’s never really been “awkward” per se, my music taste has definitely bled into a lot of my buddies’ library. Even if they don’t like it, I’m able to explain why I like or dislike certain music and they’ve grown to respect some things like grind and black metal even if they can’t stand it themselves (also sorry if this touches on things already said in other comments, I didn’t really have time to look through what else was said but I wanted to get my two cents in before I lost the train of thought lol)
Demon of the Fall 08.04.20	Yeah I find it cathartic as others have said, I don’t feel angry very often but I definitely did use it to express my previously suppressed emotions. As for people thinking you’re weird, well yeah they do - but then I very rarely expose my music to anyone else these days for those reasons.