Asahi: Tell me about your first time

BookoftheFallen 11.26.17	still a virgin like most on here
SCREAM! 11.26.17	Was taking forever to finish due to being so nervous about it. Was her first time too so the pain she was in from losing her virginity + the fact that neither of us knew what we were doing probably didn't help. Wasn't able to finish cause we heard her parents get home and had to interrupt and get dressed blahblahblah Crazy to think that was almost 11 years ago now though
wwf 11.26.17	Was super timid about it at first but she came so good job everybody
Koris 11.26.17	In my car when I was 18, after seeing The Great Gatsby together. Car was small, and it was hard to maneuver around. Also, my car got smashed by a deer an hour later.
Papa Universe 11.26.17	was cool, didn't cry
wwf 11.26.17	Pretty sure scream remembers it better than I do and it was like two years ago for me lmao
teamster 11.26.17	My basement, mom upstairs, we were both 15. Young and stupid. No protection. I barely got the tip in, it was all over. Lasted seconds. Monumental.
TheSonomaDude 11.26.17	my uncle
brainmelter 11.26.17	I was hella drunk and I was going at it for 2 hours and I just couldn't cum
SandwichBubble 11.26.17	30-Year-Old Male Virgin Wizard
Papa Universe 11.26.17	King Gizzard and the Virgin Wizard (this joke would have been more fun if it were at kingdedethefifth's expense)
SandwichBubble 11.26.17	Who'll be my King Gizzard, hands up
Sinternet 11.26.17	i was 16, horny and hella awkward she was 16, horny and hella awkward we fucked in a field because we were scared of our parents finding out i got mud on my dick but it was alright
Sinternet 11.26.17	and by mud i mean
zakalwe 11.26.17	Mom upstairs.
brainmelter 11.26.17	damn sin, you should have told her to at least clean her aNUs. but it's fitting you were in a field for such an act
brainmelter 11.26.17	probably in da cornfield
Sinternet 11.26.17	i like it u̧̝̰̘̝̐ͩͭn̝̱͚͚̲̝̩̰̎̋̾̀ͅc͍ͭļ̶͚̺͕̮̤͉͉̋͐e͊̉͏͚̭͕́ȁ̴̪̍n̵̗̝̝̫̾̀͑̈ͭ͡
Lord(e)Po)))ts 11.26.17	my first time was pretty precious and wholesome. me and my first gf took each others virginity in high school. it was good.
Deathconscious 11.26.17	Fucked a good friend of mine, went over to her house got really drunk and banged for like 3 hours. Then we remained close friends and still fuck each other once in awhile when we're both single. Its a nice setup i have here. None of that awkward "i think im falling for you" bullshit.
Papa Universe 11.26.17	you were drunk, so your 3 hours were about 3 minutes with multiple uncomfortable positions.
neekafat 11.26.17	Lucky I did it with a girl I had been dating for a long time so she was sure she was ready, wasn't a lot of pressure involved aside form the usual nervousness about hurting her 1st time sucked, 2nd time was great
neekafat 11.26.17	@Adolf that sounds pretty fucking solid tbh, I'm a bit jealous
BlackwaterPork 11.26.17	things escalated from just kissing to the full thing in a few seconds cos she randomly just pinned me down and started going at it. I really didn't have much clue what was going on for a while cos it was so unexpected.
neekafat 11.26.17	Sounds non-consentual Blackwater
zakalwe 11.26.17	Summer 1997. I was was 17 and although I’d had girlfriends I was fucking useless and hadn’t got me leg over. I was at a House party, lots of drink. Ended up copping off with a 43yr old friend of my mums. She wasn’t half bad looking. Good times.
BlackwaterPork 11.26.17	@neeka No I was pretty bloody happy with what was happening, would have said if I was uncomfortable
Deathconscious 11.26.17	"you were drunk, so your 3 hours were about 3 minutes with multiple uncomfortable positions." Its actually because i was drunk that i was able to last that long.
Papa Universe 11.26.17	keep telling yourself, stud
neekafat 11.26.17	@zak of course that's how your first time went lol @Blackwater well I certainly wouldn't be complaining in your position too I probably would've been happy if I was a bit younger but 18 is nothing to really sneeze at
Deez 11.26.17	I honestly cant remember. So many half in moments that I dont know when the official was.
Deathconscious 11.26.17	Unique is the angry virgin itt.
Papa Universe 11.26.17	i'm taking the burden of that role upon myself, so that others don't have to. i'm a hero in disguise
BlackwaterPork 11.26.17	I was 16 but was expecting to be about 20 when I actually lost it
DarkTyler 11.26.17	never had sex
AlexKzillion 11.26.17	still got that vcard/// was about to lose it last night in my truck but then the bish was like "what if this ruins our friendship?" -_-
TheSpaceMan 11.26.17	cried for months after because i felt like a slut
hal1ax 11.26.17	think i was 17 and had to stop after like 5min so i could go throw up. had drank way too much.. then came back to bed and immediately passed out 'twas disastrous
Deez 11.26.17	'had to stop after like 5min so i could go throw up' Ive no doubt thats what most of the girls ive slept with say
hal1ax 11.26.17	haha
BlackwaterPork 11.26.17	Lmao
Deathconscious 11.26.17	Lol
matbla00 11.26.17	not sure if that's true but still funny lol
Lord(e)Po)))ts 11.26.17	"Its actually because i was drunk that i was able to last that long. UniqueUniverse 11.26.17 [Report this Post] keep telling yourself, stud" have you literally ever gotten tanked and fucked?
butcherboy 11.26.17	behind the church's ambo, Sunday, 9pm, Father Francis.. gentle but firm..
BlackwaterPork 11.26.17	Your chemical messages travel slower across your synapses when you consume considerable amounts of alcohol, so you'll find it does take quite a while to get it done
Papa Universe 11.26.17	I never got drunk, so that's probably where the scepticism comes from.
Lord(e)Po)))ts 11.26.17	unique like 50 summin' and he doesnt even know what 'whiskey dick' is
Papa Universe 11.26.17	50 years sober baby
BlackwaterPork 11.26.17	Lol
Lord(e)Po)))ts 11.26.17	its all yall sober cats that bust in 3 seconds
Lord(e)Po)))ts 11.26.17	my how the tables have turned
Papa Universe 11.26.17	have they?
Lord(e)Po)))ts 11.26.17	name one recreational drug that makes you cum faster than usual, that doesnt also make you confident that "im going to fuck you approximately 3000 times in the next hour on every surface of the room from floor to ceiling until you cant even walk".
butcherboy 11.26.17	E..
Nomos 11.26.17	you may be kidding but I do love a good story time girl on PlentyOfFish.com messages me next night we meet at coffee shop make out in her car her parents are rich and she lived in a guest house on their property Watch Momento Watch Moulin Rouge while she gives BJ --- cut to 2 days later, been hanging out for 2 days go to bang, tell her its my first time, she gets nervous that she's gonna ruin it I don't care, bang, it was fine, she....just laid there didn't use condom, I luck out and nothing comes of that three weeks later she stops seeing me for her ex dodged bullet, moved on no prob, I was 19 and thankful I wasn't a virgin into my 20s
Lord(e)Po)))ts 11.26.17	u cant because ur sober grampy peen like pouring salt on a slug
Lord(e)Po)))ts 11.26.17	"E.." nope
Papa Universe 11.26.17	F..
butcherboy 11.26.17	yep.. tactile, not speed-induced aggro..
Demon of the Fall 11.26.17	Drunk sex is awesome yeah, go at it like a jackhammer. I’ve heard it’s better if you don’t force or encourage drunkenness on your partner, especially if they’re underage... or at least that’s what they said in court.
Papa Universe 11.26.17	G..
Papa Universe 11.26.17	H..
Deathconscious 11.26.17	"u cant because ur sober grampy peen like pouring salt on a slug" Lmao
butcherboy 11.26.17	shrooms work too, if it channels properly..
Lord(e)Po)))ts 11.26.17	@butch 'e' is just mdma with a fuck mix of speedy bullshit in it. if u can get a boner good luck nutting. so no. e goes in the first category. an example of the second category is ghb. ull both nut like 5000 times in an hour.
Avagantamos 11.26.17	22 years old still no fuck :(
Deez 11.26.17	E is the only thing that really works for me but my mind drifts too much ill be dead into it thinking im some rock god porn star then il have a vision of playing with toys as a child with my mum. Makes things pretty awkward.
BlackwaterPork 11.26.17	E is certainly a good album by Enslaved...
butcherboy 11.26.17	worked for me.. also, there's a plant called barrenwort that is apparently some sort of homeopathic ejaculate steroid..
Deathconscious 11.26.17	"then il have a vision of playing with toys as a child with my mum." I love this thread.
Lord(e)Po)))ts 11.26.17	i think there is some miscommunication here butcher. none of your examples are drugs that make you prematurely ejaculate.
Lord(e)Po)))ts 11.26.17	unique was saying that alcohol makes you prejac which is empirically false and so i asked him to name a drug that could ever make you prejac without substantially heightening your libido and sex drive. none of those examples you listed meet that specification at all.
Papa Universe 11.26.17	i don't do drugs, so i don't know... ...yeah, i'm always the boring one at the party. the weirdo in the corner with no friends. never even had as much as a bloody pot puff
Lord(e)Po)))ts 11.26.17	its all good, u just give me shit all the time so i feel an obligation to return the favour whenever possible. no big
Lord(e)Po)))ts 11.26.17	really explains some of your music taste tho XD
Papa Universe 11.26.17	that it is good? yeah, it does.
butcherboy 11.26.17	oh!.. i was just listing drugs with which i love to fuck.. or loved in the case of E.. still partake in shrooms on occasion..
Papa Universe 11.26.17	and when did i ever give you shit, pots?
Sinternet 11.26.17	wholesome shittalking hell yea
Avagantamos 11.26.17	I've only been able to cum once on e/molly and it was a fucking struggle. had to jerk it so hard and I was only semi hard
Lord(e)Po)))ts 11.26.17	nearly every conversationwe have ever had has either been you trying to rile me up or me trying to rile you up in return.
Papa Universe 11.26.17	damn. well, maybe if your riling was worth a cunthair i'd notice.
Avagantamos 11.26.17	shrooms would be fun though, makes skin feel really squishy and stretchy for me
Papa Universe 11.26.17	(sorry, just had to say it)
Lord(e)Po)))ts 11.26.17	"oh!.. i was just listing drugs with which i love to fuck.. or loved in the case of E.. still partake in shrooms on occasion.." yeah word, i thought something seemed off lol.
Deathconscious 11.26.17	Idk where universe's douchebaggery is coming from with me, we've never had any squabbles.
Lord(e)Po)))ts 11.26.17	"damn. well, maybe if your riling was worth a cunthair i'd notice." even the swampiest ingrown cunthair on a disease infested crackwhoress's broken minge is worth more than your objectively false statements about sex, drugs, and rock and roll so i'll stick with the lady pube thanks.
Papa Universe 11.26.17	hmm. overly conceptual remark as a comeback. nice. game recognise game here.
Lord(e)Po)))ts 11.26.17	fist bump
Papa Universe 11.26.17	Adolf: I am usually nice to people I don't have frequent inteferences with. Besides, I can't give you shit, cause one half of your name is my favourite person associated with the jews, and i can't trashtalk him.
Papa Universe 11.26.17	fist bump back
Lord(e)Po)))ts 11.26.17	"Besides, I can't give you shit, cause one half of your name is my favourite person associated with the jews, and i can't trashtalk him." holy fucking shit need to go scream into the toilet this was so epic
Lord(e)Po)))ts 11.26.17	THE AMBIGUITY
Deathconscious 11.26.17	JESUS HITLER ADOLF CHRIST IS THIS THE SECOND COMING OR THE FOURTH REICH??
Prancer 11.26.17	Lorde "I made a really long and pretentious thread about how I take meds to help my anxiety that apparently causes me to act like a trifling keyboard warrior so I could pretend like people cared about my status as Sput's favorite superstar" Pots.
BlackwaterPork 11.26.17	You should fuck off you fucking fucker
Papa Universe 11.26.17	fucking fuck you, you fucking fucker
BMDrummer 11.26.17	in my car, middle of the maine woods in the fall when i was 17 listened to red house painters afterward and got pizza, it was a dope night
BlackwaterPork 11.26.17	Fuck
Asahi 11.26.17	Thread now has turned into a drug thread. I'll allow it.
Lord(e)Po)))ts 11.26.17	@prancer congrats you are the first person to belittle me for my mental health issues on the entire site, underneath the veil of an alt. Gold star for being the worst person
Deez 11.26.17	I took a girl back to a hostel once and went for a piss but I ended up shitting myself. Luckily it was quite solid. Wed lost our keys so I jumped in through the back and washed my arse in the swimming pool. She was that drunk by the time id opened the door she didnt realise i had totally different clothes on. Nailed her on the sofa. BOOM! but at some point I got like a whiff of shit and remembered I hadnt washed my hands. Im quite the romantic like.
teamster 11.26.17	C’mon , all you turds that did for your first time in your teens, sober, scared as hell...lasted more than a couple minutes? I don’t buy it. Well unless you had been doing the five knuckle shuffle since puberty.
Deez 11.26.17	Yeah for real Ive Jizzed before it even got in there when I was like 14 or some shit.
Lord(e)Po)))ts 11.26.17	I dont think anybody sayin that im sure i bust in like 2 seconds my first time
Lord(e)Po)))ts 11.26.17	Lmao deez that story
Papa Universe 11.26.17	whoa, since when is teamster geting mean? is it the community that poisoned him with its toxicity?
Deez 11.26.17	I didnt tell ANYONE till about a week late dude haha
Lord(e)Po)))ts 11.26.17	I was rockin the five knuckle shuffle before anything even came out
teamster 11.26.17	I must be a Wally cleaver ...if you think that’s getting mean UU , lol
Lord(e)Po)))ts 11.26.17	my one friends first time was with a random chick he picked up from the bar and she bled all over him so he ran to the bathroom to clean up and when he came out his door was wide open and he went out and she was running down the hall with nothing but a towel on with a stack of his shit she was trying to steal and he had to chase her down. he realized he was gay shortly after
Papa Universe 11.26.17	damn, snappy remarks too? teamster is sput-maturing
Deez 11.26.17	hahahaah I lived in Asia for 4 years had so many chicks steal shit. 2 of them are dead now.
Lord(e)Po)))ts 11.26.17	it truly bring a tear to my eye proud
Lord(e)Po)))ts 11.26.17	"had so many chicks steal shit. 2 of them are dead now." wow this thread is ripe with insidious implications i love it
zakalwe 11.26.17	I slept with a bird who went full on lezza shortly after. Can’t blame her tbh.
Lord(e)Po)))ts 11.26.17	lol
zakalwe 11.26.17	Butch as fuck
Deathconscious 11.26.17	@team I wasnt scared cause she was a close friend of mine and i wasnt sober, so those things worked to my advantage. Otherwise i probably would have been a one pump chump.
BMDrummer 11.26.17	@xxx nah i is 18, still with this gal too
Sinternet 11.26.17	i realised i was gay when i sucked some guys dick and forgot to say no homo true story
zakalwe 11.26.17	How marvellous. How brave.
Deez 11.26.17	Ive tasted like 4 dicks and didnt like any of them
ArsMoriendi 11.26.17	Went on a Grindr date. We saw Ex Machina and both liked it a lot so much that we only made out during the scenic transitions, afterwards we went up to my dorm and the rest is history. I only bottomed that night though, so I guess you could count that first time I topped as it's own first time as well I was 19, so a little late, but not too late
butcherboy 11.26.17	"Butch as fuck" you rang?
zakalwe 11.26.17	Having one up the arse after ex-machina. How very Greek.
Sinternet 11.26.17	nah the greeks only tolerated you if you were a top because it was dominating and puts he bottom in their place
zakalwe 11.26.17	Makes sense. How compassionate.
zakalwe 11.26.17	Bummer
Papa Universe 11.26.17	rough days
vialsofwet 11.26.17	don't remember it aside from the photos my friends took 14 yo me gone blackout off a handful of cruisers fucked an 18 yo girl at a house party surprised i could get it up in hindsight i've cum a long way since then
ImmortalPaper 11.26.17	we was both 13 and in wholesome love n shit, it was extremely brief bc she was in so much pain but we tried again later and that was pretty fuckin' great oh and i did use protection cause im not a heckin' dumpass
Space Jester 11.26.17	First time was two months ago on my wedding night. It was the last night of her period but she thought it would be over before that night it I was like fuck it I’m not about to pussy out over a little blood, most girls bleed the first time anyway. We ended up moving to the shower to let some of it wash away but it was overall still good despite the blood. Every day after that was blood-free and awesome and we’ve been getting better and better at it as we learn things
hal1ax 11.26.17	every drug that affects your endocrine system [hormones] (which most drugs do) will protract ability to orgasm. dopamine / endorphin agonist drugs (opiates / amphetamines / E) especially curb your sensitivity to sex-hormone secretion and also fuck with your libido.
hal1ax 11.26.17	then with alcohol / benzo's (at high quantities), which act on GABA receptors, basically they just slow down brain / central nervous system activity to the extent to which your brain is unable to undergo the necessary communicative transduction required to elicit an orgasm
Prancer 11.26.17	@pottyman boohoo. I'm not belittling you, but that thread is ridiculous. So you have anxiety and have made bad decisions. I've had similar problems and know several people who have too, you're not special. You apologized to people for saying shitty things but yet I see you starting 'drama' with another user in this thread. I just think it's funny and quite hypocritical. If you think people on the internet are truly out to "rile you up," get over yourself.
ImmortalPaper 11.26.17	opiates will also utterly destroy any notion you once had about an orgasm
hal1ax 11.26.17	@ immortal - lol pretty much
Space Jester 11.27.17	Lordepots isn’t even close to being the most insufferable user on the site and I dunno why people give a shit about how people act on a music forum anyway, seems petty. And UniqueUniverse was definitely the one who started acting like a prick, not pots
Deathconscious 11.27.17	Sounds like someone got shat on by pots and is still upset about it.
teamster 11.27.17	Adolf - “one pump chump” - dude I am laughing so hard right now!!
teamster 11.27.17	Bad choice of words
Deez 11.27.17	Prancers definitely a virgin. This thread hurt him.
RogueNine 11.27.17	What first time?
verdant 11.27.17	amazing thread
Brabiz 11.27.17	Blasting Not The American Average by Asking Alexandria. I had no idea how anything worked. Shit was gross
onionbubs 11.27.17	i met him at a show when i was 15 and he tried to solicit nudes from me. he also jacked off to me over skype
someguest 11.27.17	the girl pooped or maybe that was her breath
Prancer 11.27.17	The guy never directly bothered me, but I'm on this site enough and I rarely go a week without seeing him bickering with someone over some dumb shit. I mean I have a keyboard too and I don't respond to every dumb thing someone says on this site, so I'm just saying get over arguing with some plebs on a broken music website if it's going to trigger your anxiety. Also FYI getting shat on is in my top 5 fetishes, and I am already aware I am a hypocrite in this instance as well by engaging in shit I am telling someone to get over.
someguest 11.27.17	cool story, bro
Relinquished 11.27.17	“FYI getting shat on is in my top 5 fetishes” lmao
hal1ax 11.27.17	why not just post this shit on your main account, prancer? don't be a little bitch
someguest 11.27.17	sounds like he should just get into farming
Prancer 11.27.17	This is my main account. It's my second account I've had on this website, yes, but the only one I use. As if I would actually have some kind of reputation on the first account to uphold as a come-and-go user.
HalfManHalfAmazing 11.27.17	Honestly, it was really pathetic. I was 20 years old and got pressured into losing it by a friend of mine. I met up with this Japanese girl on tinder and we started dating. I think about the third or fourth time we spent time together, we parked at a non-descript parking lot next to a Starbucks and went at it (protected of course). She felt super loose and neither of us came. Lol, I deeply regret it.
brainmelter 11.27.17	Jesus Christ I could never have sex while on mushrooms.
Minushuman24 11.27.17	on my birthday, in Las Vegas at the MGM It was with a girl I technically just met, but I have been talking to her for about half a year prior. It was nice.
TheSpaceMan 11.27.17	"what if this ruins our friendship?" Literally the hardest friendzone of all time lmao
Lord(e)Po)))ts 11.27.17	i dont have enough fucks to give to read much of what happened in this thread while i was gone but if I ever hurt Prancer (dont remember ever interacting at all, my apologies) enough that he thinks that blowing up at me for me and Unique Universe teasing each other (which, btw, is totally cool for both of us, Unique and me have always been cool and always bug each other, there is no animosity in it from either of us) then i'm sorry that i upset you and feel free to continue venting about it here if you feel that that is helpful in my absence!
Kompys2000 11.27.17	Haven't lost it yet, I'm still young though so no rush
neekafat 11.27.17	ctrl + f "drifter" heh
someguest 11.27.17	like everything else built around a societal or religious regimen the effect of losing one's virginity is overhyped and melodramatic to the nth degree
mifzal 11.27.17	Cabbage
Papa Universe 11.27.17	"@prancer congrats you are the first person to belittle me for my mental health issues on the entire site, underneath the veil of an alt. Gold star for being the worst person" Bloody hell, that was my job. Prancer, you stole it from me!
mifzal 11.27.17	It was 14 and so was I
BigBlob 11.27.17	I was the cabbage
ExecutiveExecuterexe 11.27.17	did it over the summer
Papa Universe 11.27.17	And you'll get more once you finish that death metal album of yours.
cold 11.27.17	I was 15, met a girl from a trailer park. She took my virginity in her room with her bedroom door wide open, while her grandma was in the next room over. Meet Joe Black was on the TV in the background on mute with Korn's "Issues" blasting from the boombox. Gross.
0GuyMan0 11.27.17	was 15, flushed condom down her toilet. her dad found it later, kicked her and her mom out of the house and they divorced. I married the girl, but....that day sucked a bit.
BigBlob 11.27.17	how the fuq did he find it?
Papa Universe 11.27.17	And why did he kick them out of the house for that?
BigBlob 11.27.17	cos the dad thought his daughter wasn't "active" and her mum was the one who flushed the condom? LOL
0GuyMan0 11.27.17	it floated back up
0GuyMan0 11.27.17	they were probably looking for a spark anyway, but he feigned or practiced ultra religious bullshit. threw them out that night, all their shit on the lawn. the whole thing. we've not spoken to him since. he will never see his grandchild.
BigBlob 11.27.17	what a twat
JS19 11.27.17	Was a one night stand in first year of uni (went to a boys' school so opportunity was a bit thin on the ground in those years). Was pretty good. Was incredibly drunk so don't remember a huge amount
MoosechriS 11.27.17	First time was pretty standard for me, girl i was seeing at the time was staying at mine and my parents were out. Nothing else other than that really, as usual it’s all a bit awkward as you don’t really know what the fuck your doing but it was cool.
guitarded_chuck 11.27.17	not much of a story to it, banged a girl after school at her place one day when i was 16