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Emeritus
Reviews 107
Approval 98%
Soundoffs 43
Album Ratings 429
Objectivity 63%
Last Active 11-27-20 3:47 am
Joined 04-14-17
Review Comments 2,492
| i got a new job :sunglasses:
after a good nine-month cycle of laziness, self-loathing, writing, self-loathing, laziness, uncertainty about the future, laziness and self-loathing, i've found something that might break the mould. to celebrate: here's a list of digs so deep they reach the earth's core. | | 1 |  | pospulenn
sun people sleepwalker
i am working at a bar with no prior hospitality experience because i have mastered the art of bullshitting my way into things apparently......no!!! the faintest whiff of nepotism does not help!!! how dare you!! | | 2 |  | francis harris
minutes of sleep
me: hello good evening may i take your order
manager, suddenly: oi who are you and what are you doing behind the bar | | 3 |  | women
public strain
i'm fairly sure i've forgotten how to communicate verbally so this shall be interesting | | 4 |  | paysage d'hiver
kristall und isa
i also have to wear my hair in a bun and let me tell you fellas: i look like a recovering meth addict who's chosen a life of coffee with soy milk/listening exclusively to bands that haven't formed yet | | 5 |  | four tet
rounds
my latent appreciation for idm carried me to and from the interview this morning, which only took about two minutes before the manager said: "yeah you seem alright mate, come back next week for induction, cheers!".......i'm still expecting more follow up questions and/or a camera crew to jump out of the bushes as if i've been pranked tbqh | | 6 |  | the body
no one deserves happiness
ironically, my current mantra is something along the lines of: idodeservehappinessidodeservehappinessidodeservehappinessidodeservehappinessidodeservehappinessidodeservehappiness | | 7 |  | cursed
II
already holding out for the day doing this job morphs slowly and subtly into just another routine, and i can stop micro-managing my interactions with people i don't know; i will stare at the planes departing through the terminal window and feel not envy nor worry. | | 8 |  | des ark
everything dies
oink oink dishpig | | 9 |  | oxbow
king of the jews
if i get fired i'm thinking the most likely reason will be one of the following:
a) singing jenny hval lyrics too loudly
b) slipping alcohol into a child's soft-drink
c) slipping soft-drink into an adult's alcoholic drink
d) telling someone who doesn't care one too many times, that my internet friends and i got a little bit gay over the weekend | | 10 |  | ishome
confession
me: hi how are you!
customer: good, how are you?
me: yeah great, how are you?
*glasses myself in the face* | |
verdant
09.11.17 | i will still hang around here more than i should!!! unlucky lads!!! | butcherboy
09.11.17 | welcome to the bartending life, jack.. the first six months will be more fun than you'll ever have.. followed by bags-under-your-eyes, poetic gloominess and intermittent violence shuffle.. it'll be amazing! you'll get stories for writing aplenty though.. | verdant
09.11.17 | hell yes butcher! i'll probably be working in the kitchen for a while before they need me to do shifts at the bar but i'm keen to be doing at least something y'know? at least i know now i'm in prestigious company :pp | Flugmorph
09.11.17 | :congratulatingDAB: | verdant
09.11.17 | :good_morning: | MuhNamesTyler
09.11.17 | Awesome | verdant
09.11.17 | :] i know thanks yes agreed | ZombieToyDuck
09.11.17 | Congrats Jack happy for you dude! Bartending shouldn't be too bad for you man. I used to work in the restaurant biz and I'm sure you'll do great! | Egarran
09.11.17 | Welcome to the machine.
On another note I've always used a ponytail to control my hair. The other day I made a manbun for ironic fun. Like that's some hipster bullshit. But the gf thought it was sexy af.
So now I have an identity crisis. | AsleepInTheBack
09.11.17 | hell yeeeaah boii | verdant
09.11.17 | thanks for your support peepole i will need it to get through this tough but necessary time >:) | guitarded_chuck
09.11.17 | congrats brother HH | ZippaThaRippa
09.11.17 | "d) telling someone who doesn't care one too many times, that my internet friends and i got a little bit gay over the weekend"
Don't know what you're talking about | verdant
09.11.17 | I'm am never drinking again brother HH
| Conmaniac
09.11.17 | ayy congrats jack v proud of ya! when I come down and visit ill have to hit this bar up | zakalwe
09.11.17 | I've worked in a few pubs. Real characters, 'normal' people, not one jot of bullshit to be found anywhere.
They were good days. | verdant
09.11.17 | no people is are actually being normal | Egarran
09.11.17 | they sure am | verdant
09.11.17 | they sure amn't* | CalculatingInfinity
09.11.17 | Woooooooooooooo happy for ya buddy :] | Dedes
09.11.17 | Hah things didn't even get slightly gay over the weekend nerd what the fuck are you talking about? | verdant
09.12.17 | sorryand thanks calc! | Chortles
09.12.17 | this was a fun read, congrats bb i hope u enjoy your job and get the BIG TIPS | verdant
09.12.17 | thank thank thank you chawtells although i live in Aus so i won't be getting any tips......unless you're referring to being courted and then granted sexual favours by male customers???
....in which case i, uh, still won't be getting any tips... | Toad
09.12.17 | good stuff good stuff. gettin that money yo | verdant
09.12.17 | yes yes yessss |
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