|
User
Reviews 6
Approval 75%
Soundoffs 29
Album Ratings 338
Objectivity 80%
Last Active 01-03-23 10:23 pm
Joined 07-22-13
Review Comments 11,781
| Top 10 Christmas Songs š
If you work in retail, or are a human on planet earth, you are aware of how tragically terrible the vast majority of Christmas music is.
These are 10 songs that break that mold, and set the stage for thousands upon thousands of copycat artists to make a quick buck off Sandy Claws hype. | | 10 |  | Eartha Kitt
The Fabulous Eartha Kitt
Santa Baby
If you donāt like this song, you are a prude.
Trivia Time: Did you know a large portion of the most iconic Christmas songs were written by Jewish composers? Let it Snow, Itās the Most Wonderful Time of the Year, Silver Bells, and Rudolf the Red-Nose Reindeer are just a few that fit this bill. Unsurprisingly, most of these songs are secular, as the Jewish ideology doesnāt exactly vibe well with the traditional Christian Christmas. Santa Baby is credited to two composers, Joan Javits and Phil Springer, both of whom are Jewish. | | 9 |  | Paul McCartney
McCartney
Wonderful Christmastime
This simple and bright song features Paul McCartney doing what he does best: singing strong melodies over catchy pop-centric songwriting. Itās not perfect, I find it a bit one-note, but you can tell Paul had fun writing this. In my opinion, this is what allows the few modern Christmas songs that rise from the rubble to shine, they write catchy songs about Christmas without sacrificing their values as an artist. Say what you want about All I Want for Christmas is You, but thereās no denying that Mariah Careyās performance is strong and heartfelt, not just existent. | | 8 |  | The Jackson 5
Jackson 5 Christmas Album
Santa Claus is Coming to Town
Honestly, I kind of hate the original version of this song, the fuck is Santa doing watching me sleep? But young Michael took it to a whole nother level, specifically for one reason: That. Fucking. Hook. Like gotDAMN that hook is fire. One of the Jackson 5ās classic cuts, Iād really only place it behind I Want you Back and ABC as their most iconic tracks. | | 7 |  | Johnny Mathis
Heavenly
Sleigh Ride
Thereās a reason every 5th grade band class in the history of mankind learns this song, this shit SLEIGHS. Whether listening to a vocal or instrumental version of this song, the perfect melody and wonderful composition will always shine bright. Even the 5th graders always slaughter this song, I swear. Itās pretty much impossible to fuck up. | | 6 |  | Bing Crosby
Merry Christmas
White Christmas
The Official Song of 65 degree Fahrenheit Christmas Eves. Bing Crosbyās slow-burning croon is sure to bring the warm-fuzzies to even the coldest of hearts. I find this setting (Dean Martin/Frank Sinatra type big band vocalist, scored with classy and lush orchestration) to be the ideal for Christmas music, and is likely the reason that so many songs from this era have stuck around so long. Donāt worry Green Christmases, I still appreciate you. (:
Oh, and Jewish composer btw. | | 5 | | Bing Crosby
Merry Christmas
Iāll Be Home for Christmas
This song shares many structural similarities to White Christmas, but I find it slightly stronger due to its comforting message. Thatās right folks, a Christmas song with a message that isnāt superficial garbage! My favorite part about Christmas is the chance to reconnect with family members who I may be drifting apart from due to life, and this song taps into that feeling so well it can make you sob in the right circumstances.
Also, āIāll be home for Christmas, if only in my dreamsā¦ā is the greatest plot twist in Christmas music history. | | 4 |  | Vince Guaraldi Trio
A Charlie Brown Christmas
Skating
While the entire Charlie Brown Christmas soundtrack is utterly fantastic, this song takes the cake. It features what is probably my favorite performance on piano ever, with its downward spiraling scales perfectly encapsulating the sensation of skating down the banks of a frozen lake, hot chocolate on deck. While I wouldnāt call it the perfect Christmas song (itās really only a Christmas staple because of the soundtrack it was on), I would absolutely call it a perfect song.
Since it is instrumental, I have no problem listening to this all year long. If you have a problem with this you can talk to my lawyer. | | 3 |  | Elvis Presley
Christmas Album
Blue Christmas
God, I fucking love this song. Elvisās slightly silly, slightly tongue-in-cheek vocals mesh so well with the old school rock nā roll, almost hill-billy style guitars and other instrumentals to create the sexiest Christmas song of all time. Sorry Santa Baby, youāre in 2nd, thereās no touching Elvis when it comes to sexiness factor.
But this songās Secret Superpower comes in the form of its backing vocals. Itās something you may have never even noticed, they are definitely subtle. But those ooo-Ooo-WEE-Ooo-oooās man, so fucking good. The way Elvisās melody harmonizes with these vocals is what sells the song to me. A few years ago, I was humming along to the ooo-weeās and my uncle told me, āIāve never heard someone hum that part of the song before!ā Well, they fucking should man, they fucking should. | | 2 |  | Wham!
The Best of Wham!
Last Christmas
Thereās an argument to be made that this is the corniest song ever written. But some glitch in the matrix has caused this track to rise to almost Never Gonna Give You Up levels of showing up absolutely everywhere in the silliest of situations. But thereās no denying that this song is dumb catchy. Itās like an inside joke, if you arenāt in on it, you wonāt understand why or how this song has made the traction it has over the years. But at this point, everybodyās in on it. If this song doesnāt put a stupid grin on your face, youāre a Scrooge! | | 1 |  | Nat King Cole
The Christmas Song
The Christmas Song
The title does not lie. This is, indeed, THE Christmas song. Everything about this song is flawless, from Nat King Coleās vocals, to the lyrics, to the melody, to the compostition. Everything. In my opinion, the entire concept of writing songs for Christmas wouldnāt be as prevalent if it wasnāt for this song right here. Artists have been trying, and failing, to recapture the wonderful imagery, the warmth, and the beauty of this track for nearly a century. And they will always fall short. This is one of the greatest songs ever written.
Oh, and of course, Jewish Composer. | |
nol
12.23.22 | Honorable mentions to Carol of the Bells, AKA the high school choir song, and all of Tchaikovskyās work on the Nutcracker.
I could also see swapping Baby itās Cold Outside for Santa Baby, if that song wasnāt borderline date rape. | Sinternet
12.23.22 | oh man i dont think any other than 2, 9 or 10 would make my list, but hey theyre all pretty good. at least its not little drummer boy which is one of the worst songs ever written.
i'd add:
mariah carey - the obvious one (it rules)
jona lewie - stop the cavalry
fairytale of new york obviously
wizzard - i wish it could be christmas everyday
slade - merry xmas everybody
every sufjan christmas song
the entire los campesinos christmas ep (especially their version the holly and the ivy)
east 17 - stay another day is not amazing but is incredibly nostalgic (aslso not particularly christmassy but is part of the uk xmas canon)
the darkness - christmas time (dont let the bells end) - i never liked this band but this track is wholesome and nice
andy williams - its the most wonderful time of the year
john + yoko - happy xmas (war is over)
in terms of traditional ones, i think good king wenceslas is one of the best hymns ever written | Titan
12.23.22 | Band Aid - Do They Know Itās Christmas?
2, 8, and 9 are outstanding as well. | Emim
12.23.22 | O Holy Night | DJD1ed
12.23.22 | 9 can fuck right off. | twlight
12.23.22 | have yourself a merry little Christmas
1 is 1 indeed | twlight
12.23.22 | also be carful saying the C word on sput, sure to offend many here | Sinternet
12.23.22 | "also be carful saying the C word on sput, sure to offend many here"
surely you cant be this brainrotted | normaloctagon
12.23.22 | Good list
Sint stays not understanding that there are cultural norms of language that exist outside of the UK lol | Shemson
12.23.22 | Great list but whereās āDriving Home For Christmas!?ā Absolute classic! | IsisScript80
12.23.22 | "9 can fuck right off."
Amen. | PitchforkArms
12.23.22 | Please check out the version of White Christmas by The Mills Brothers. Absolutely splendid.
This time of year is full of absolutely fantastic music if you can keep it pre mid-60ās. Prrferrably pre-60ās entirely. | Rawmeeth38
12.23.22 | No andy williams - most wonderful time of the year??? Treason. | nol
12.24.22 | āalso be carful saying the C word on sput, sure to offend many hereā
sorry I meant The Day Jesus Christ Was Bornā¢ļø | Flashmobba
12.24.22 | gotta have stone temple pilotsā Christmas time is here version | SlothcoreSam
12.24.22 | Louis Armstrong - Cool Yule is a classic. | nol
12.24.22 | where is Family Force 5ās Grandma Got Ran Over By a Reindeer??? Absolute treason. | PitchforkArms
12.24.22 | Sloth - check out ā āZat you Santa Claus?ā by Louis |
|
