Review Summary: Soulja Boy + Explicit Content = V.I.C and his debut album, except this is leagues below Soulja Boy....
V.I.C –
Beast
The Myspace page of Queens, NY native V.I.C has an in-depth description of the prodigy’s humble beginnings, including early glimpses of brilliance like his rap about drug awareness, composed at the usually juvenile age of 10. He struggled to make himself heard, having to constantly bug big name music moguls to give his sick rhymes a listen or two. Upon finally being signed, V.I.C was given the chance of a lifetime to awe audiences everywhere with his ridiculous lyrical flow and profound subject matter.
“Having cleverly crafted his style over the years, V.I.C.'s perfect musical medium is a hybrid between witty battle rhymes and energetic southern party music. For instance, the infectious party-jam "Wobble Wobble" produced by Mr. Collipark and The Package Store production team. Over a polyrhythmic drum track and festive horn section, V.I.C. mannishly spits: "I'm so explicit/ but I can't help it/ My flow is ridiculous/ The boy got a gift/ like it's gotta be Christmas."”
Yeah. So his Myspace is pretty self-indulgent. The unfortunate truth is V.I.C sucks hard, and is more of the same Soulja Boy radio garbage that had edgy teens bouncing up and down at high school dances everywhere. There isn’t even anything remotely catchy on
Beast though, as it is quite possibly the worst album I have ever even thought of giving a spin.
Only making matters worse is how blatantly obvious all of the recycled and already-been-done material is.
Beast begins this with an incredibly apparent rip-off of T.I.’s hit
What You Know, except
What You Know was pretty good, and the nasally vocals that ensue on this track made my ears bleed (not literally). Adding on to a list of woeful attempts at dicey and intriguing composition are a Lil’ Wayne reference in the form of, “I’d let em lick the rapper, but I’m not weezy!”, a Hurricane Chris appearance with a beat nearly identical to
Ay Bay Bay and an old-school Batman twist, and the Lion King-influenced active sing-a-long
Wobble, which comes off as an even worse
Macarena without the essential nostalgia. Oh yea, V.I.C also busts out his own rendition of
Soulja Girl with
Blow My Mind. The content here is much more offensive, discussing c*** rings, the act of licking whipped cream off of his girl’s breasts, as well as licking other areas unsuitable for this review. V.I.C had the privilege to cross into more treacherous grounds, being of legal age, whereas Soulja Boy and other contemporaries are still finishing high school, but this is disgusting and has no place in today’s popular music. At least make it emotional and/or decent, like that kid from Detroit who single-handedly opened the minds of millions across America (and everywhere else too). The album is also chock-full of completely pointless and horrid attempts at being funny that are the numerous skits. Avoid these, but then again, avoid this whole album.
In all honesty, I expected this to be bad, but I initially hoped for at least a few groovy beats or something, but pretty much everything on here is rehashed from some other ****** recording, with the only enjoyable bit being the simple piano in
By Faith. The lyrics are utter **** throughout, with defining moments such as the middle verse of the MTV hit
Get Silly:
“My chain too silly
my wrist too silly
the girls throw me dish cuz my rims big billin
My ride too silly
i ride too silly
We for fantastic cuz I got a deally
cuz now im im worth a millian
forget a rubberband cuz you cant put a rubberband around a billian
I be wildin on a island somewhere just like gilligan
drillin who like a who like a dentist at the den like villerann
I ba ba ba Im da man girlfriend
Im da reason why you wanna lose ya man girlfriend
Im calm like da sea
Im blowed like the wind
And now that Im straight im bout to act a fool again”
Deep, complex, passionate, or influential they are not. Catchy? Nope. I’m positive this is going to cash in millions for the radiant MC, to everyone’s dismay.
Who really paved the way for young rapper’s to achieve mainstream success with a complete lack of any decent influence? The 16-year old Jibbs struck gold back in 2006 with his album
Jibbs featuring Jibbs, but while overall being a mediocre recording it at least had a few guilty pleasures. Lil Bow Wow (now “Bow Wow”) and Lil Romeo rocked Nickelodeon and the likes before him. Most recently was Soulja Boy, and all he really did was provide an annoying and gratuitous song that everyone could dance to (the
Crank That dance is actually ridiculously easy and is not fun in any way, shape or form, or cool for that matter either). In the end it’s all the same, disgraceful, distasteful and dumbed down beyond belief.
I hope this didn’t sound too rant-like or biased in any way, as I really tried to avoid the urge and came in open-minded and intent upon delivering an adequate review for an up and coming artist. Alas,
Beast is downright awful, and will easily take the coveted trophy for worst album of the year. It lacks the catchiness of having
“King Kong in the trunk”, while proving to be far more vulgar than simply
“Superman-ing that **”. Thanks V.I.C, for emulating every ****** aspect of hip-hop today into what will hopefully be the worst release of your assumingly colossal future catalog.
Score: .5/5, which unfortunately has to round up to 1/5.
Beast is currently streaming on the artist’s Myspace page, and will be released on the 26th of this month.
