Closet Witch Chiaroscuro
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AsleepInTheBack
Staff Reviewer
November 30th 2023


10250 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

This is dirty goddamn

YuriZakhaev
December 1st 2023


1066 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

Iowan grindcore don't play, hoowee

Zac124
December 1st 2023


2770 Comments

Album Rating: 3.0

album slaps

Dewinged
Staff Reviewer
December 1st 2023


32053 Comments

Album Rating: 3.7

Love the band name and the cover, gotta check. Great review? Johnny.

zaruyache
December 1st 2023


27467 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

pummels like a war metal band

JohnnyoftheWell
Staff Reviewer
December 1st 2023


60750 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

get the witch get the witch!!!

"Pizza"

review was loosely inspired by oulipo poetry, my experience translating haiku, and (mainly) my own shitpost instincts, which i will be refurbishing post haste if they're broaching pizza territory. two line sentences where the first word of each reverses the sounds of the last word in the one above = stupid way to review, but i'll have something even dumber this time next year

Christbait
December 1st 2023


356 Comments


You taught me some new things this morning, but I still need a genius.com commenter to break the review down for me.


Wildcardbitchesss
December 1st 2023


12327 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

Christ almighty this is fucking relentless

JohnnyoftheWell
Staff Reviewer
December 3rd 2023


60750 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

who is witching show yourselves

AsleepInTheBack
Staff Reviewer
December 3rd 2023


10250 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

*stares at shoes while brewing another potion*

JohnnyoftheWell
Staff Reviewer
December 3rd 2023


60750 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

*slurps wine sorcerously*

I met a (visual) artist earlier who informed me of the apparent compatibility between Aries and Gemini and sold me a print with an excellent boob that I will give my sis for Christmas. She had moderate closet witch energy - have any of y'all come across someone more suited to the brief?

Mort.
December 3rd 2023


25489 Comments


johnny did u ever peep this?


https://theheadsarezeros.bandcamp.com/album/all-the-men-i-love-are-dead?fbclid=IwAR1Iqf0G93FBLEn7morH6nZlYp2gzacIxemr2SvGgKBflZgt3etCvoIYBc4

JohnnyoftheWell
Staff Reviewer
December 3rd 2023


60750 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

No! I wanna hear it but am on fucking Dave Brubeck rn - how do I segue?

Pikazilla
December 3rd 2023


29931 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

gridlink vs closet witch in a riff-off

Mort.
December 3rd 2023


25489 Comments


'No! I wanna hear it but am on fucking Dave Brubeck rn - how do I segue?'

with great aplomb

(empty tunnells is the must check track)

AsleepInTheBack
Staff Reviewer
December 3rd 2023


10250 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

“gridlink vs closet witch in a riff-off”



The answer is Chepang



Or this idk I really

Like

This

JohnnyoftheWell
Staff Reviewer
December 3rd 2023


60750 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

"https://theheadsarezeros.bandcamp.com/album/all-the-men-i-love-are-dead?fbclid=IwAR1Iqf0G93FBLEn7morH6nZlYp2gzacIxemr2SvGgKBflZgt3etCvoIYBc4"



lol okay this fucks



Mort.
December 3rd 2023


25489 Comments


and it was one of my first ever reviews!!

Pikazilla
December 3rd 2023


29931 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

gridlink winning for me ngl

JohnnyoftheWell
Staff Reviewer
December 3rd 2023


60750 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

octave serpent SOTY

other than those two Chepang classics



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