The Beatles
Abbey Road


5.0
classic

Review

by Nolan D. USER (6 Reviews)
March 1st, 2021 | 88 replies


Release Date: 1969 | Tracklist

Review Summary: Talk is cheap!

I have a love/hate relationship with the practice of music journalism, or any other form of written or verbal description of music. On one hand, it is the most practical way to record your thoughts on any particular song or musical moment. If someone were to ask you, “Hey, what do you think of Come Together?” you wouldn’t write them a song. You wouldn’t bake them a cake. You’d simply say, “I like it! It’s super chill, with a tight, yet minimal groove that fits right in the pocket.”

On the other hand, words often fall short of the bigger picture. No matter how romantic your prose is, or how many fancy adjectives you use, it is impossible to capture the exact feeling of a song without pulling it up and pressing play. Many reviewers and critics lose sight of this, assuming that their word is gospel, and that to disagree with them is to disagree with the decisions of the artist. But it is not so; their words are a secondary source of absorbing the music.

Language can also manipulate people’s opinions through the use of clever rhetoric. Take I Want You (She’s So Heavy), for example. Think about how easy it would be to put a negative spin on this song. The lyrics are ridiculous, repetitive and redundant. It is stylistically jarring, switching lanes as soon as you get comfortable with the groove. And the ending is just three minutes of bullsh*t noise. While wordsmiths are beating their brows trying to think of a way to weave their taste into poetics, the casual listener can tap into the truth: It’s just good, man.

First and foremost, the Beatles wrote sonic experiences. Their whole ethos was in spite of the critic, in opposition of the elitist appraiser. It can be difficult to put a finger on exactly why their vague appeals to “LOVE” feel so profound, but that’s part of the magic. They were masters of mystique. Whether written about sub-nautical flowerbeds, solar cycles, drag queens, or drunken royalty, each moment is imbued with a subtle brilliance, deeper in practice than on paper. By rendering the need for verbal description obsolete, they threatened the status quo of writers who served as the musical gatekeepers of their time.

Clearly, we should follow their example and banish all music criticism. Bring pitchforks to Pitchfork! BURN DOWN SPUTN- I’m kidding. I don’t wish to demonize music journalism, in fact, that’s what this is. But it can be helpful to remember that listening to music is an intimate experience between you and the artist. It is not an intimate experience between you, the artist, and some snobby pencil pusher who needs to submit their review by 5 pm CST, or they will get a stern talking-to from the higher-ups. Music is personal. Don’t take my word for it, though. Talk is cheap!



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user ratings (4782)
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Comments:Add a Comment 
nol
March 1st 2021


9630 Comments

Album Rating: 5.0

Brought to you by: THE DISCOURSE™



Writing about albums that do not need to be written about since 2021!

Digging: Silk Sonic - An Evening with Silk Sonic

Koris
Contributing Reviewer
March 1st 2021


12409 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

Oh shit, nice! My favorite Beatles

zakalwe
March 1st 2021


35038 Comments

Album Rating: 5.0

Absolute fucking waffle

normaloctagon
March 1st 2021


6998 Comments

Album Rating: 5.0

talk! it's only talk!



this pos brought to you by THE DISCOURSE™

nol
March 1st 2021


9630 Comments

Album Rating: 5.0

this is more about music journalism than abbey road tbh

Colton
March 1st 2021


13251 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

Very nice. Your writing has a good rhythm to it and points were made



Neg’d

ArsMoriendi
March 1st 2021


35609 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

This review is barely even about Abbey Road

Digging: Tom Waits - Blood Money

Colton
March 1st 2021


13251 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

did you neg it



super lame if you did

Koris
Contributing Reviewer
March 1st 2021


12409 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

I mean, he did say this is more about journalism than Abbey Road 🤷🏻‍♂️

Trebor.
Staff Reviewer
March 1st 2021


58237 Comments

Album Rating: 3.0

Very bold of The Beatles to release a concept album about the controversial character Abbey from The Last of Us: Part 2 and her journey

Digging: dltzk - Frailty

parksungjoon
March 1st 2021


38543 Comments


its the work of john lenin and the beat-hers

im not surprised anymore

nol
March 1st 2021


9630 Comments

Album Rating: 5.0

“This review is barely even about Abbey Road“

Talk is cheap!

parksungjoon
March 1st 2021


38543 Comments


First and foremost, the Beatles wrote sonic experiences.

nol
March 1st 2021


9630 Comments

Album Rating: 5.0

@park https://tenor.com/view/sonic-hedgehog-running-speed-fast-gif-13996745

parksungjoon
March 1st 2021


38543 Comments


sonic-hedgehog-running-speed-fast-gif

nol
March 1st 2021


9630 Comments

Album Rating: 5.0

@park: https://tenor.com/view/sonic-floss-sonic-flossing-sonic-the-hedgehog-movie-gif-16310252

Koris
Contributing Reviewer
March 1st 2021


12409 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

@Treb: so are you saying that Maxwell’s Silver Hammer is actually Abbey’s golf club instead?

parksungjoon
March 1st 2021


38543 Comments


sonic-floss-sonic-flossing-sonic-the-hedgehog-movie-gif

Koris
Contributing Reviewer
March 1st 2021


12409 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

That was the last movie I ever saw in theaters before the pandemic 😔

nol
March 1st 2021


9630 Comments

Album Rating: 5.0

I really think these guys could make it big one day



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