Coheed and Cambria
The Unheavenly Creatures


4.0
excellent

Review

by Xenophanes STAFF
October 11th, 2018 | 17 replies


Release Date: 2018 | Tracklist

Review Summary: Welcome Home

Full disclosure: I feel that Coheed and Cambria have released three stone cold classic albums (and an equal number of terrible ones) but I couldn’t tell you one thing about The Amory Wars. I’d like to think Claudio is literally singing about mayonnaise, but know I it’s clearly something space-related. That being said, Coheed and Cambria are clearly at their best when diving head-first into their disjointed mythos, with a series of prequels and non-canon records yielding a decade of false starts and dead-ends. Unheavenly Creatures (if the physical packaging doesn’t use that absurd full title then I’m not going to either) is a continuation of the story which started with Second Stage Turbine Blade and, musically, it feels just like it, too. After 10 years, Unheavenly Creatures brings Coheed back home.

Being the truest Coheed album in quite some time Unheavenly Creatures is billowing with content. At 80-minutes it’s too long, too unwieldy, and too indulgent, but it’s Claudio operating at peak cheese—seven-minute power-romps sweep wildy, build higher and higher, and end with boisterous one liners that would make your eyes roll were it written by anyone else. Hell, there’s an entire song built upon rhyming “boy” with “toy” as well as one titled “Love Protocol.” Said with enough conviction and backed with a catchy hook, even lines like “The soundtrack placed over this heart/ It shares no rhythm of mine” can be anthemic and sincere. Some of its triumphs have been done better in other albums, with “The Dark Sentencer” failing to match its progenitors “Welcome Home” and “No World for Tomorrow.” Soulful ballads have been excised, multi-part suites are gone, and the band is on 10 the entire time. But when lofty chorus kicks in at the end of “Black Sunday” it doesn’t really matter. When the multi-layered vocals in “Night-Time Walkers” start waxing camp, it doesn’t really matter. And when “The Gutter” really kicks in gear with a rollicking Brian May-style guitar solo, it doesn’t matter. Coheed’s latest disappoints in all the expected ways, but it kicks ass just as you’d expect, and in every way that matters.



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user ratings (195)
Chart.
3.8
excellent
other reviews of this album
Thompson D. Gerhart STAFF (4)
A fluid collection of top-notch signature singles that espouses self-influence without self-indulgen...

Rowan5215 STAFF (4)
ok this is epic...

btpw (3.5)
Not what I hoped it would be, but still another strong effort in an impressive back catalog....

Balto (4.5)
"Welcome Home."...


Comments:Add a Comment 
Xenophanes
Staff Reviewer
October 11th 2018


1387 Comments

Album Rating: 3.5 | Sound Off

I mostly want to make this Age of Adz pt. ii

Digging: Coheed and Cambria - Vaxis - Act I: The Unheavenly Creatures

SowingSeason
Moderator
October 11th 2018


28118 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

I can't say for certain why this isn't showing up under staff reviews. I tried forcing a refresh of the site content but no luck. Maybe the site is onto our bullshit.

Digging: mewithoutYou - [Untitled]

mynameischan
Staff Reviewer
October 11th 2018


164 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

but I couldn’t tell you one thing about The Amory Wars




you know enough to know that its Amory instead of Armory, so i'd say you have a leg up on most

Snake.
October 11th 2018


20966 Comments

Album Rating: 3.5

do people actually call it the armory wars lmfao

mynameischan
Staff Reviewer
October 11th 2018


164 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

i can't tell you how many times i've seen that online

Xenophanes
Staff Reviewer
October 11th 2018


1387 Comments

Album Rating: 3.5 | Sound Off

I only knew because they say it in The Afterman lmbo

NocteDominum
Contributing Reviewer
October 12th 2018


8870 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

I can't say for certain why this isn't showing up under staff reviews.




You guys hit the limit haha

Rowan5215
Staff Reviewer
October 12th 2018


40661 Comments

Album Rating: 4.4

we're here



to catch



THE BOMB



bumped because this album is superb in the car

Digging: St. Vincent - MassEducation

AtomicWaste
Moderator
October 12th 2018


2778 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

Age of Adz pt. dos HERE WE COME

WatchItExplode
October 12th 2018


5931 Comments

Album Rating: 3.5

I've never actually met someone who tries to follow Claudio's stories or buys the comics etc. It has never hampered my enjoyment of their stellar earlier albums.





AtomicWaste
Moderator
October 12th 2018


2778 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

I have the SSTB trade that covers that whole story arc in the comic. It does help to read/see some things, but the enjoyment of the music is mostly independent of the comics for me. And most of the time the comics just add a story you never would've thought of listening to the music anyway. For example, somehow 33 is about Josephine's boyfriend, Patrick, driving for his life to get away from monsters. "33" is his license plate number. Go figure.

Kalopsia
October 15th 2018


2905 Comments

Album Rating: 3.5

"I've never actually met someone who tries to follow Claudio's stories or buys the comics etc. It has never hampered my enjoyment of their stellar earlier albums. "



^yep, I love the shit out of Coheed but dgaf about following the story beyond what I can glean from the lyrics themselves or doing any homework

Digging: Circles - The Last One

Storm In A Teacup
October 16th 2018


24058 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5 | Sound Off

"I’d like to think Claudio is literally singing about mayonnaise"



it's a great feeling

jmh886
October 16th 2018


2134 Comments

Album Rating: 3.5

man this kinda drags doesn't it?

SandorClegane
October 17th 2018


198 Comments


Claudio's vocal tone and inflection severely impede me from taking 90% of their material seriously. It's been 10 years and I cannot get over it.

SmurkinGherkin
October 17th 2018


1828 Comments


Is this a good place to start with these guys?

Kalopsia
October 17th 2018


2905 Comments

Album Rating: 3.5

"Is this a good place to start with these guys?"



god no.

start with their first 3 albums, then go from there.



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