will.i.am
Songs About Girls


1.5
very poor

Review

by Iai EMERITUS
September 27th, 2007 | 31 replies


Release Date: 2007 | Tracklist

Review Summary: A vapid, near-worthless dud from the Black Eyed Peas lynchpin.

Here's a cool word I found.

je·june (jə-jūn') pronunciation
adj.

1. Not interesting; dull.
2. Lacking maturity; childish.
3. Lacking in nutrition.

[From Latin iēiūnus: meager, dry, fasting.]

You can also use 'jejunely' and 'jejuneness'. Sometimes it's useful to know stupid words, like when you're searching for exactly what to say about a boring album with absolutely zero substance.

Songs About Girls is will.i.am's third solo outing outside of the Black Eyed Peas. Seeing that BEP have had considerable success since his last effort, and that will.i.am has been putting in numerous appearances as a guest producer for the likes of Nas, Common, Talib Kweli, and Pussycat Dolls, this one is considerably more anticipated than Lost Change of Must B 21. Will himself describes it as a concept album about relationships, with reports surfacing that it was inspired by a long-term relationship he recently came out of. All of which means that you'd expect this to be his great chance to become credible with a much wider audience than the one that respects him now, and all of which makes it a little surprising that he's fluffed his chance so spectacularly. Contrary to his claims, this is the most vapid material he's ever conjured, and that's saying something when you consider that this is the man behind "My Humps", "I Love My Bitch", and "Beep".

The positives. will.i.am is considerably more talented as a producer than as a rapper, and with a few of these songs, it's easy to see how a good rapper could have made them something worthwhile. The music - which is also handled on various tracks by Polow Da Don and Fernando Garibay - is unashamedly trying to appeal to both clubs and commercial radio throughout, which at least makes it more focused than a lot of rap albums that feel divided into categories. You can't really call it solid when you've got tracks like the sub-Jamiroquai "Impatient", but it's passable, with occasional hints that will.i.am can actually be quite inventive when he sets his mind to it. And that's about it, really.

The negatives, on the other hand, are numerous. The first, paradoxically for a rap album, is that there's a serious lack of guest appearances here. will.i.am does have a decent voice and a decent flow, and he's definitely not bad enough to ruin an album when he's only one of three rappers, but he is nowhere near good enough to carry an entire album by himself, and the absence of the other Black Eyed Peas throws his shortcomings as an MC into sharp relief. Only Snoop Dogg gets invited along for the ride here and even though his input is nothing special by his standards, it's a highlight just because it's not will.i.am, and that means it's not will.i.am's lyrics.

There's no getting around it - will.i.am is a seriously crappy lyricist. "I Got It From My Mama" is the single most throwaway piece of music produced in 2007, consisting of nothing more than a call-and-response of 'Where'd you got that body from"/I got it from my mama!', and a list of observations by Will, like 'If a girl ugly, nine time out of ten, she ugly like her mama', and 'If a girl got booty, nine times out of ten, she got booty like her mama'. Sadly, he doesn't note that 'some girls' mothers are bigger than other girls' mothers', which is just another mark against an already terrible song. "She's a Star" contains the word 'bling' repeated more times than I care to count. And then, of course, you've got the amazing couplet of 'I know you want more than a dick in ya, you want a good ****** to stick with ya....'

Even when will.i.am makes the effort to get serious for a minute, he falls on his ass. "S.O.S. (Mother Nature)" closes the album with a dedication to the environment and a warning about global warming, and it's awful. By this point I doubt even the most skilled lyricist could say something on this topic without being boorish, obvious, or annoying, and will.i.am is all three.

Although it's obvious exactly what will.i.am is trying to do and who he's trying to appeal to, it's hard to imagine anybody enjoying this album for more than one listen. It's too empty, too boring, too lifeless, too lazy. There's not even one song here that sounds good enough to be a big single, although "I Got It From My Mama" might. In short, Songs About Girls is an abject failure on practically every level.



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user ratings (55)
Chart.
1.5
very poor


Comments:Add a Comment 
The Jungler
September 27th 2007


4826 Comments


oh man. I Got it From My Mama is most definitley the single most throwaway piece of music produced in 2007. I can't imagine why it was released as a single, and am very glad it doesn't have much airplay.
Good review.

Iai
Emeritus
September 27th 2007


3553 Comments

Album Rating: 1.5

DFelon's gonna love me for reviewing this.

MeowMeow
September 27th 2007


662 Comments


you tore this album a new one. great review. i never had any interest in checking this out, I'm not a fan of his voice.

blackmilk
September 27th 2007


583 Comments


stupid intro

Iai
Emeritus
September 27th 2007


3553 Comments

Album Rating: 1.5

Intro also uses the word 'stupid', if you look closely.

Jom
Staff Reviewer
September 27th 2007


3106 Comments


Hahaha. Well-written and very easy to read. I'm a little curious about how your "the positives" paragraph begins... a colon seems a little more fitting than just "The positives." But, you're a much better writer and reviewer than I am, so it's your call.

LifeInABox
September 27th 2007


3709 Comments


Oh my god. We are running out of stupid hit songs, so we have to resort to " I Got It From My Mama".

ohcleverhansyou
September 28th 2007


885 Comments


Had you watched Fraiser, you would already have known jejune. This is a shame, I had some hopes for this CD.

samthebassman
September 28th 2007


2164 Comments


The first single is horrendous, Im not surprised to see you rated the rest as crap.

Iai
Emeritus
September 28th 2007


3553 Comments

Album Rating: 1.5

Rapreviews gave it a good rep too, which was really shocking.

Monticello
September 28th 2007


805 Comments


Sadly, he doesn't note that 'some girl's mothers are bigger than other girl's mothers', which is just another mark against an already terrible song.

That seriously made me lol.

Riziger
September 28th 2007


316 Comments


nice short review that probably summed up the album in your first paragraph about that word alone.

i got it from my momma is definitely one of the most irritating songs i've heard on radio for awhile and it says something about the mainstream music scene when it's around the top of the charts..

MrKite
September 28th 2007


5020 Comments


Sadly, he doesn't note that 'some girl's mothers are bigger than other girl's mothers', which is just another mark against an already terrible song.

This review was awesome.This Message Edited On 09.28.07

AtavanHalen
September 28th 2007


17920 Comments


Entertaining read!
I most probably won't look further into this.

P13
September 29th 2007


1327 Comments


lol. I got it from my mama is the 2nd worst! The worst is that song Lipgloss... so bad its actually mind melting.

Spectrum
September 29th 2007


347 Comments


Haha, I enjoyed this review. It was entertaining to say the least. Just one more thing to add to my list of 'music to avoid forever', I guess!

Unreal
September 29th 2007


229 Comments


love that introduction. good work

rapfan84
September 29th 2007


2 Comments


this critic is WRONG, this is one of the best hip hop cds i've heard all year, the production is amazing

Acre
September 29th 2007


847 Comments



this critic is WRONG, this is one of the best hip hop cds i've heard all year, the production is amazing


You know what... I'm not even going to bother critiquing your post, as obviously you're one of those 15-year old types that find out someone doesn't like their music, signs up to the website, and posts a grammatically horrendous counter, then never shows up ever again, so...

Bye.

rapfan84
September 30th 2007


2 Comments


I am actually 23 and can write "grammatically" if I feel the need to. Obviously the people who listen to the critics on this site are idiots. Kanye's new album got a 2/5, but 50's got a 3/5, are you shittin me? Graduation is probably the best cd I've heard all year, with this one coming in second. Curtis, on the other hand, is garbage.



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