tl;dr rock n roll is fucking dead

"fret not"

ha

didn't rate wile-e-kyoto i guess cant please everyone doesntmatteriguessdidntspendthatlongonitithinkillsurvivebutiguessporcsgetsinandhedoesntevenknowitohmanwhataloss

https://www.instagram.com/p/CLC4dkyF9Ht/

All rock stars should be executed and Phoebe and her guitar are the executioner

can we please acknowledge that I Know The End is the worst song ever written now. You guys were all going batshit cause she does the most contrived half assed metal impression of all time, and look where that's gotten us now

she could go the toilet paper PR route and promise to plant a few guitars

I'm still impressed at the durability of the guitar

This having a dedicated news article means the battle is already lost :/

I'm just amused at how calculated the entire thing was. Then again, I'm equally amused by how a bunch of people were pissed about her "smashing" a guitar that didn't even break or even have so much as a dent

"half assed metal impression"

real?

yeah have you heard the song

basically metal yeah

Bridger I hardly know her!

Decided to watch, what with all the controversy. Phoebe looked like she would have had a hard time breaking a bread stick over the end of the table. Everything about that performance was so low energy and contrived it was like toddlers rocking in an imaginary band.

The guitar smashing was so contrived and phoned in, it was lame to watch BUT all the gen Xers who apparently forgot nirvana was a thing and got mad over it was funny so I’ll give her that

lmao steak

might bump my Punisher rating down

might bump my Punisher rating up

might not bump my Punisher rating at all

This story is punishing

this is my favourite news article

also this stunt was almost as spectacular of a fail as that one Phoebe Bridgers interview where she refers to herself as a fully functioning human adult

Best news article i've read in a while. Bridgers, on the other hand, embarrassing.

can't tell if everyone's memeing or something but people actually care about this?

she destroyed a guitar on live tv when she could have donated it to charity. people are right to be pissed

nothing quite as punk as failing to destroy a guitar on a fake monitor in a secured enviroment after acquiring verbal consent from all complicit parties to a mumford and sons cover

ahh noted

she playing SNL these days? good for her

Are musicians in 2020 really attempting to destroy musical instruments while complaining about not being paid enough by Spotify?

That's not punk, that's just fiscally irresponsible.

Thing about it is that usually bands would do that back in the day because they’d have deals with guitar manufacturers that would garantee them replacements for free or at a discounted price, so really it’s neither

Phoebe has a deal with the Halloween shop that if she splits or soils her skeleton onesie she is guaranteed a replacement for free or at a discounted price

didn't she call David Crosby a "lil bitch" after this performance?

"Thing about it is that usually bands would do that back in the day because they’d have deals with guitar manufacturers that would garantee them replacements for free or at a discounted price, so really it’s neither"

That sounds like a thing you made up to be honest. I remember Pete Townshend talking about how he had his roadies go to pawnshops to pick up cheap guitars for him to smash on stage and how this habit set him back quite a bit and meant he didn't start actually profiting off the Who for a decade.

And that was back when musicians actually made money off music.

that trumpet going off at the end makes it more funny

Fucking lol brilliant article

Thank you for writing this article Johnny. I enjoyed it very much.

Best take on this yet J-Bois, got me gigglin. Can't believe this whole thing got any traction at all. The internet is a ridiculous fucking place.

didn't she call David Crosby a "lil bitch" after this performance?


Yeah he chimed in and said guitar smashing was dumb, and she tweeted back that he was a bitch lmao.

My heroes are the 1975 and David Crosby is a little bitch

He called her guitar smash "pathetic" (which it was, she fucking couldn't even do it) and she called him a little bitch

it was pathetic, which i'm confident was intentional, or at least accounted for.

yeah thats why she tried like 8 times

yes because all the legendary guitar smashes were done in one swift chop. hendricks punched a hole in his and ripped it apart with his bare hands doncha know

I fucking love you Johnny

Ur right she couldn't break it after 8 tries so logically that means she was actually TRYING to be pathetic

It was all a part of her plan to not break the guitar don't you see

she was playing 4D chess all along

"Ur right she couldn't break it after 8 tries so logically that means she was actually TRYING to be pathetic
It was all a part of her plan to not break the guitar don't you see"

LMAO!

Quality article, quality thread

Unrealised Sanitary Safe Smash must be an overlooked mode in Special Smash

Why is this still being talked about

boomers are two days late on everything so it's still trickling out for them to get angry at.

David Crosby - executed.

Who's next? Step right up

Lmao as if the people mad about her grand display of white privledge via trying to smash a guitar instead of donating it to charity are anything but millennials and zoomers

Yeah wait till all these people mad about the wasteful smashing of a 100 dollar guitar hear about how much goes into financing socially useless Marvel movies or something.

With all this ire towards Phoebe, the revolution's surely just around the corner

It was a $600 Dano 56 apparently. That's basically a whole stimulus check.

what are the odds of SitarHero being one of the angry people complaining about this on Twitter?

Also as if anyone other than boomers watch snl

Zaru got literally every aspect of this backwards

If the math I've recently learned checks out, that basically = $2000
Sleep with one eye open, Phoebe

Phoebe Bridgers took the first step, it's too bad it was a weak effort.

I hope 2021 is the year she gets ripped and comes back to destroy SNL for good

Also as if anyone other than boomers watch snl

liberals in general love this shit what the fuck are you talking about?

Zaru got literally every aspect of this backwards


nah pots it was a performance, as I said it was intentional or at least accounted for, meaning she did a goofy thing on tv intending for it to be goofy whichever way it played out. which it was.

I suppose your goofiness is intentional or at least accounted for as well? Convenient.

You don't back pedal this hard and throw a twitter tantrum over a stunt like this if that kind of reaction was intended and accounted for. She thought it was going to be cool, but it was lame, and now she feels defensive about it.

"Yeah wait till all these people mad about the wasteful smashing of a 100 dollar guitar hear about how much goes into financing socially useless Marvel movies or something."

Fucking lol

If it was planned or intentional, that makes it even worse.

yeah, if you premeditate something and it's lame, then your premeditation is also lame. not very pop punk of her tbqh

However proud you are of this, it is too much

sorry for that, phoebe's manager's mum's backup sputnikmusic account

The fake guitar smash is pretty pathetic but not as pathetic as most of the reactions I've seen

okay but most of the reactions are literally just people saying "The fake guitar smash is pretty pathetic" checkmate

“Are musicians in 2020 really attempting to destroy musical instruments while complaining about not being paid enough by Spotify?

That's not punk, that's just fiscally irresponsible.”

What the fuck are you talking about lmfao

this is one of the funniest things i've read in recent memory. well done

"what are the odds of SitarHero being one of the angry people complaining about this on Twitter?"

About the same as you being able to correctly identify chicken tikka I'd say.

"What the fuck are you talking about lmfao"

Instruments are expensive and being a musician doesn't pay well.

not directed towards you specifically Johnny but oh my god who the fuck actually cares about this

The manufacturer said it was a tough guitar to break and she doesnt look very muscular, and so she didnt have a lot of luck breaking it.

Omg rock is deed.

Rock and is dead :[

Jesus can we just shut up about her already?

"[insert genre] is dead" always cracks me up, cant believe people still say that shit past high school.

yeah for sure, doo-wop lives on m/ m/

This whole thing is so dumb. I was talking about it on RYM and some boomer started ranting about how she is violating the "essence of rock"

Destruction is the essence of rock and rock is the essence of beauty

"Punk is FUCKING dead." Did anyone know *that guy* back in the day? Thats what all of this reminds me of.

I am that guy

"Instruments are expensive and being a musician doesn't pay well."

You don't get asked to be on SNL if you haven't already made it. You're right in general, but phoebe herself is doing just fine.

Cringe

I just cant believe the attention and rage this is getting, for something done at midnight on a bad out of fashion show, she is an artist, so premeditated acts are quite common, any front persons dancing, yelling, audience rising attempts are all premeditated, and anybody who calls her "white privilege" is really reaching. I say who cares; it was slightly entertaining and gave me a laugh at its absurdity which was the point. If she stood there like a statue as it seems people wanted she would have been blasted as well for being boring.

The performance was pretty good and the guitar smash fits with the end of the song. The amount of takes here and across the internet is what's lame imo. Let the woman smash her guitar.

Johnny better go out and spraypaint "rock n roll is dead" under a bridge or something, this article doesnt feel complete without it. I want a picture.

This is the biggest non-issue I’ve ever seen why is this news hahahaha

this article is certified serious

you sir are (not) fake news

"You don't get asked to be on SNL if you haven't already made it. You're right in general, but phoebe herself is doing just fine."

The original comment was meant to be humorous. And besides, she seems to have not done much damage to the guitar anyway so it's probably moot.

LMFAO people are actually mad?!

ok

WHY DIDNT SHE INCREASE HER MUSCLE MASS BEFORE TRYING TO SMASH A GUITAR THIS IS AN AFFRONT TO ROCK AND ROLL REEEEEEEEEEUEGXBBBIEU69

"and now she feels defensive about it."

Telling shitlib boomers to fuck off isn't bEiNg DeFeNsIvE, it's pretty status quo internet posting.

Look at you being defensive

what the fuck did i just read

this story really has been a Rorschach test for every shade of cunt

If you're mad or upset about a stupid stunt you need to log off, you're a complete idiot

There is one word the perfectly encapsulates all aspects of this (literal) non-event...

nothing quite as punk as failing to destroy a guitar on a fake monitor in a secured enviroment after acquiring verbal consent from all complicit parties to a mumford and sons cover [2]

""Instruments are expensive and being a musician doesn't pay well."

You don't get asked to be on SNL if you haven't already made it. You're right in general, but phoebe herself is doing just fine."

IDK how comparable SNL is to the Stephen Colbert show and the Jimmy Fallon show, but Nilufer Yanya played on both of those shows, and she definitely hasn't "made it."

good thread

"IDK how comparable SNL is to the Stephen Colbert show and the Jimmy Fallon show, but Nilufer Yanya played on both of those shows, and she definitely hasn't "made it.""

I'm pretty sure the same mechanisms are at work—the artist's management/record company rep gets in touch with the music director/producer of the show and asks for a slot for an artist with an album to promote. It's not so much an artist having "made it" so much as it is a promotional tool for the artist's financier. AFAIK SNL doesn't need to ask anyone to be on the show.

I'd also imagine playing SNL is a bit more prestigious than talk shows because of its reach and the fact that it's on only once a week rather than 4-5 nights a week.

Feel like only internet cry babys get upset about smashed equipment. Walk away from the screen, nerds.

I think the real talking point here is how consistently awful the sound mixing is for every single SNL performance.

it's like that so boomers can continue to say music these days isn't good anymore


also: Colbert I know at least has made attempts to promote indie and underground-ish artists going back to his Colbert Report days.

I loved the Colbert Report, but hes pretty cringe these days.

Just read an article that said the guitar was only worth $85 lol

Powerful

adult more like “a dolt”

help me

article was hilarious and anyone still watching SNL is bound to get upset at people smashing stuff cause they are probably 60 year old, half commatose, old farts

What can I say, Danelectro makes kickass guitars

True that.

Me: *glances over at a Gibson LP and the headstock snaps off*
Bridgers: *smashes a Dano over a monitor multiple times and not a scratch*

https://www.cnn.com/2021/02/09/entertainment/phoebe-bridgers-guitar-trnd/index.html

MORE *CLAP* WOMEN *CLAP* GUITAR *CLAP SMASHERS *CLAP*

https://www.musicradar.com/news/phoebe-bridgers-responds-to-online-overreaction-to-her-guitar-smashing

Epic unpacking of corny culture

all culture is corny

Quality Danelectro ad

Zaru be like "SEE ITS THE WHOLE POINT LET ME FILE YOUR FOOT WARTS OFF WITH MY TONGUE PHOEBE-SAN"

"she destroyed a guitar on live tv when she could have donated it to charity. people are right to be pissed"

Plz for the love of God tell me you aren't serious

"Plz for the love of God tell me you aren't serious"

Prolly not but you know there are at least 500 twitter users who absolutely believe something like that.

Children in Africa could have eaten that guitar

@evilford would it be okay if I just burned $85 in front of a bunch of poor children as "performance art"? just because something is part of someone's art doesn't make it okay

@SIX JOKE THIEF

Damn I wish I coulda had guitar for dinner. Dam u phoebe whoever

those Kids could and should just pirate FruityLoops lmao

Fruit Loops is the Mega Blocks to Fruity Pebbles Legos.

Like I understand the outrage for the other allegations threads and whatnot. Being pissed at someone for attempting (and even failing mind you) to break an $85 guitar on TV is ridiculous. How many times have you gone for a scenic drive? Or bought a snack that you didn't need? Or bought alcohol for fun times that you didn't "need". Or spent money on drugs you didnt need. There's $5 or $20 or $3 or $50 that you could've given to people who needed it more but you wasted it. There are countless examples in everyone's daily lives. She tried to break an $85 guitar on TV and failed wow like how the fuck is this even news?

I understand the news article. I dont understand the backlash that the article is reporting i guess

"I dont understand the backlash that the article is reporting i guess"

Because it's ridiculous and beyond understanding you have literally done nothing wrong.

It’s because she’s a public figure with a platform. Sure the $85 isn’t much but with her influence, who knows how many other guitars are gonna get the same treatment. She effectively rerouted thousands of dollars that could have gone to a worthwhile cause just for a gimmick that didn’t even enhance her performance

Man being a celebrity now sucks.

I prefer the good old days when you became a celebrity so you could be rich and do whatever the fuck you wanted and not have to give a shit and listen to anybody. Now every celebrity needs a fucking PR department.

Please someone think of the mass produced made in Indonesia shitplanks

I think you're giving her way too much credit. Besides im sure there's plenty of negative backlash already from what it sounds like to prevent a lot of this from happening.

Was there outrage and people pissed at lil uzi vert wasting $24 mil on a forehead diamond? Cuz that is actually legitimately wasteful isn't it

How did we arrive at this $85 figure again?

I have a danelectro 12 string and I s2g it was at least 200

I was just trolling you guys but I’m out of energy now

have you tried a red bull?

No, but you just read bull

I’m sorry

SMOKE SIGNALS FUCKING RULES!!!!!! Now can we close out this thread?

Jesus christ i knew i shouldn't have even commented on this

Gottem

Guaranteed that guitar was worth no more than $200 yeah

@colton
Yeah her breaking a guitar or attempting is really dismantling society
I say let her go on her guitar genocide unhindered

May there be nothing but severed strings in her wake

@SitarHero - I brought up the $85 cost of the guitar bc i saw it mentioned in both a NME and Rolling Stone article, unless I misunderstood? Perhaps they meant repairs?

Ah gotcha, I was just curious. Dano 56's are $500-600 generally, and it seems unusual for a mainstream artist to be using an $85 anything. Who knows, maybe she got it at a pawnshop or something.

jason isbell mentioned the 85$ in a tweet [as a joke?] which phoebe responded to so presumably jOuRnAlIsTs ran with it