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| The Metal Bible: Tony
This record of history and rules belongs to the Metal Church and are property of the Metallists and the Thrash Press. | | 1 |  | Black Sabbath
black sabbath
In the beginning, there were the 1960?s. Thy 1960?s were a time of when the music was dominated by the cellar of the blind: therefore, the flower music and hippies that ruled over the land. Commonly referred towards as the 60?s, this third substage was the period of which gays liberated America, when Richard Nixon said ?march? and the miners followed. There were, however, four apostles. Four in the world of limbo, in the social peril of hippie culture and ye terror. To which they mopped all floors of human culture, of electricity disengaged; these folk went purely by their part-of-history nicknames of Tony, Bill, Ozzy, and Geezer. Let us see who these red-faced beasts were. | | 2 | | black sabbath
black sabbath
Tony Iommi was, of all things, more of a revolutionary quiver. His twenty years of age appeared to be thirty; this knave soul was indeed not a hippie. He gambled, smoked, grew his hair long, and bought many Dukes of Hazard that hippies may consider, by today, immoral and sacrilegious. Iommi had grown up in a seedy, wet, dank corner of England; more or less Birmingham. There he had begun his ascent. This man would of killed himself on his bike to cop the newest ?Saris? album, an album that would excite the suspicion of any Beatles fan. He would have been the subject of moronic commentary on Beavis and Butthead, and the toast of the trench in the Café Voltaire at the Rue-de-Saint-Goddamn-Beast-Of-An-Album. His idealism was fresh, his face was slack but pointed, and his English attitude was firm. It was only one more reason to hate the ugly-intern-banking Birmingham fellow, to which he did not deserve. This warrior, this beast, this modern day Tom Sawyer, had wanted to originally play the drums. However, they were too much of a storm for the poor fellow. Therefore, Tony undertook guitar ? the weapon of the Mountain Men. | | 3 | | black sabbath
black sabbath
However, one problem arose in the man?s life: a tragic industrial occurrence, one that was placed in the newspaper with smashing hearts and falling tears and politicians cursing their former god?s name in it. Tony had only had an accident and hurt the tip of his finger on a warm summer evening in a fire. Iommi soon joined a group of eight. These apostles were here by known as Neil, Terry, Frank, Mike, Rob, Chris, and Bill. Bill, who shall be thy only one we will mention in detail, contrasted with the rest of the ruffians who indulged in alcohol and wasted $15 on cannabis basin. This breed of human was young, dumb, and yet intense and smart ? the brilliant light of metal was clearly in his eyes. He borrowed all vices and aspired to all true rock and roll. Bill seemed to share Tommy?s fondness for the modern day metal ? the group of eight would soon be known as Mythology. They were not a simple stain on the sweatpants of metal. Their appetite was endless; it was impossible to tell these men were simply human under the crushing onslaught of pure metal riffage. Unfortunately, this beer-downing, flannel-donning, out-of-tune young men, young heroes! They were no more than simply mentioned in word of mouth. If you passed by the Café Bollocks, you would hear a man mention ?Perhaps Mythology is to record a vinyl record sometimes. | | 4 |  | yes
yes
Their journey therefore came to an abrupt end when the respectful police rushed into a practice flat with axes slung and swords raised high in the England sun and found their basin. They were therefore forced to pay the very money they wasted - $15. At the time, it was all they had combined. What would Tony do? He now consumed the terrible de la vache enrage, and would encounter many hardships. He would sometime consume a cutlet of steak that he stole, would not pay for his own clothes at the dry cleaner?s (assuming the hero ever did), could not wander the streets without a rock thrown at him. He slept badly, he question his own politics, and grew into a beast similar to Axl Rose?s personality. However, Bill stayed truthful to the young and suffering man. He would sometimes say: ?Every Batman needs a Robin.? Sometimes Iommi would be lifted by this idea, but Bill was actually talking that Tony was Robin, and that he was Batman. Therefore, they joined forces. They now swept their own floors, cleared away the rubbish, redistributed their moldy guitars and drums, and became a force to be reckoned with. They were, henceforth, Black Sabbath. | |
Killerhit
04.10.12 | TONY 1:1 - 4:4
Read with the true passion of rock. | ILikeRepetitiveMusic
04.11.12 | Can't say I read the whole thing or even half but m/ | thumbcrusher
04.11.12 | "Iommi had grown up in a seedy, wet, dank corner of England; more or less Birmingham"
lol |
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