Recspecs: Pick-up Lines Guaranteed To Work

Recspecs 12.08.11	Feel free to post pick-up lines you all have used to get some beaver/schlong in the past. Dammit, I need to grow up.
KjSwantko 12.08.11	How do you like your eggs? Poached, scrambled, or fertilized? win
Cipieron 12.08.11	I let my chloroform do the talking
Recspecs 12.08.11	"I let my chloroform do the talking" It's talk like that mister that will land you in bed with multiple passed out bitches at once.
ZilbelPing 12.08.11	"If I could rearrange all of the letters of the alphabet, I would fuck the shit out of you tonight. (More direct approach)" I fuckin lol'd
twlight 12.08.11	lol'd multiple times
YouthCat 12.08.11	You really only need one word to pick up chicks. boner.
BallsToTheWall 12.08.11	Are your parents retarded? Because you're special.
DoubtGin 12.08.11	if i were to ask you on a date, would your answer to that be the same as the answer to this question? Are you Irish? 'Cause my penis is Dublin. You must work at subway, cause you just gave me a footlong. The word of the day is legs. Want to come back to my place and spread the word? I wish I was helicase so I could unzip your jeans roses are red violets are blue i have a gun get in the van I bet I can run faster horny than you can scared. if you were a shin i'd bang you on my table baby are you a parking meter? because i'm not paying you did it hurt? when you fell from heaven? because that would explain the wheelchair People say that men think with their penises. So, how would you like to blow my mind?
AngelofDeath 12.08.11	Hey, baby, do you work at Subway? 'Cause you just gave me a foot-long.
Rev 12.08.11	Daddy's home
BallsToTheWall 12.08.11	Nice legs. When do they open?
Tyrael 12.08.11	Classic thread
Recspecs 12.08.11	If anyone has any good 9/11 pick-up lines please share.
Relinquished 12.08.11	My dick died. Can I bury it in your vagina?
Divine 12.08.11	Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by you again?
InAbsentia 12.08.11	haha that's so douchey
Divine 12.08.11	"If anyone has any good 9/11 pick-up lines please share." Baby, I'm like 9/11: just when you think it's over, I'll keep coming.
InAbsentia 12.08.11	wow.... That's what a girl would say, though.
Divine 12.08.11	yeah, pretty much
Ovrot 12.08.11	"Get In The Van"
Recspecs 12.08.11	Lol clever.
danielito19 12.08.11	nice shoes wanna fuck
Recspecs 12.08.11	nice ass wanna fuck
impoppy 12.08.11	the wheelchair thing is the worst thing I've ever heard.
Ovrot 12.08.11	Being with me is like 9/11: It's hot and you won't even know what hit you.
Recspecs 12.08.11	"the wheelchair thing is the worst thing I've ever heard." Really. That's not even in the top 100,00 for me.
Recspecs 12.09.11	Hahaha Ovrot.
vanderlyle 12.09.11	I bet I can run faster horny than you can scared. lol'd
impoppy 12.09.11	well it was an overstatement. But geez anything involving disabilities makes me uncomfortable.
Ovrot 12.09.11	Your resistance only makes my penis harder
InAbsentia 12.09.11	"Are your parents retarded? Because you're special." This one's the best. I'm going to use it tonight.
Recspecs 12.09.11	"But geez anything involving disabilities makes me uncomfortable." Get the fuck out of here pussy.
Iamthe Nightstars 12.09.11	You be the Dairy Queen and I'll be your Burger King: You treat me right, and I'll do it your way
Winsomniac 12.09.11	Excuse me miss, does this cloth smell like chloroform to you? Works all the time.
InAbsentia 12.09.11	"Excuse me miss, does this cloth smell like chloroform to you?" haha
foreverendeared 12.09.11	I'm wondering if you know what "deal breaker" means.
Crysis 12.09.11	lol'd so hard at 5
FearThyEvil 12.09.11	2 and 11 are cracking me up. Oops, I dropped my monster condom that I use on my magnum dong.
Recspecs 12.09.11	I have lots of game andcas, pick-up lines are an added option to my arsenal of suave.
Labeasy 12.09.11	The D.E.N.N.I.S System D - Demonstrate value E - Engage physically N - Nurture dependence N - Neglect emotionally I - Inspire hope S - Separate entirely works for me
Sanders 12.09.11	Let's not turn this rape into a murder.
Wolfhorde 12.09.11	Ugh, Sputnik is way too obvious. Gotta be more subtle and witty.
Sanders 12.09.11	Get your coat, I've got a knife?
jefflebowski 12.09.11	fancy an australian kiss? It's like a french kiss, but down under
jefflebowski 12.09.11	edit: too late
Gilgamahesh 12.09.11	"roses are red violets are blue i have a gun get in the van" "Excuse me miss, does this cloth smell like chloroform to you?" "Are your parents retarded? Because you're special." "I bet I can run faster horny than you can scared." HAHAHAHAHA pick up lines don't work but having some game does so try that. [2]
Thane 12.09.11	girl i know took a guy home, he seemed nice and smart and all that, then when they were about to start fooling around he asked "can i piss down your back?"
Gilgamahesh 12.09.11	Dude that's not even trying to play the game.
Gilgamahesh 12.09.11	Also, fuck that's nasty.
Wolfhorde 12.09.11	Well, at least he had the decency to ask.
Gilgamahesh 12.09.11	True, true.
qwe3 12.09.11	i get by with amazing good looks and banter but thanks bro
Ire 12.09.11	the dennis system rules
Gilgamahesh 12.09.11	"i get by with amazing good looks and banter but thanks bro" I believe in some languages, they call that... game. In others it's called juego, or Spiel, or whatever. But the English call it game.
Aids 12.09.11	"roses are red violets are blue i have a gun get in the van I bet I can run faster horny than you can scared. " oh dear
DinoX 12.09.11	1) open set 2) disqualify yourself while DHV'ing 3) Reward IOIs with IOIs/escalation and rebuttle IODs with IODs then return to step 2 4) escalate touch 5) build comfort/ rapport 6) fuck That's how I roll
Emim 12.09.11	how much does a polar bear weigh? enough to break the ice, my name's
Gilgamahesh 12.09.11	Sucks if you use that line on a zoologist.
Emim 12.09.11	but with the arctic's rapidly rising temperatures, the ice really is thin enough make your move when she starts crying
Recspecs 12.09.11	Lol @ you people taking this seriously.
Keyblade 12.09.11	Are you Shi'ite? Because when I saw you, I was like 'she aight'. Works wonders in Iraq.
Gilgamahesh 12.09.11	"make your move when she starts crying" ROFLMAO
BallsToTheWall 12.09.11	the dennis system rules (2) I was hoping that I could win women over with my sheer ruggedness, manly strength, defiant pride and physical stature but really it doesnt. They want more than that, all the pussy stuff you know like romance, caring about her feelings and life, showing sensitivity holding hands, fuck that. All I need is a brothel but god damnit I cant find one.
Gilgamahesh 12.09.11	In America they're scared of pussy. Sad but true.
Recspecs 12.09.11	Shit Balls, come to Georgia we have brothels everywhere.
Gilgamahesh 12.09.11	Or Australia. Right in the central mall there's a strip club. Or a hundred feet away where there's an adult bookstore/lingerie/toy store. Or literally twenty feet away from that where's yet another strip club. Seriously these people apparently don't know how to keep it in their pants.
BallsToTheWall 12.09.11	Hitting Georgia temporarily I believe in January. First things first, I gotta hit Brunswick to go back to the hippie hostel in the forest which was one of the best times of my life, 2. Gotta hit Atlanta and drink a few beers with Angel and Eaklanderyof at The Graveyard and The Earl, 3..finding those said brothels.
Recspecs 12.09.11	Lol go to any massage parlor with the title "VIP Massage" in either Atlanta or Macon and you will find women to s your d for money.
Gilgamahesh 12.09.11	Hm, gotta be careful about that. Herpes is not fun times, and does spread orally afaik.
BallsToTheWall 12.09.11	I'm anti clubbing and ant picking up drunk sluts, yet im willing to engage in a hot slut at brothel. My hypocrisy knows no bounds.
Gilgamahesh 12.09.11	Dude you find the hottest chicks when clubbing. And they're usually somewhat dtf. Nothing better. You CAN dance, right bro? When you learn how the club is a natural hotspot for high-quality fur.
BallsToTheWall 12.09.11	I can dance....only like an asshole. I love to wiggle and do the ripping and the tearing along with other forms of obnoxiousness. I trust a place like Amsterdam where the girls are consistently tested. I can have peace of mind knowing that the piece of Romanian ass im tapping is healthy. South Florida leads the nation in AIDS outbreaks, the whole free love approach/massive bi/straight/gay community down here means there are a whole lot of STD's being passed back and forth like some kind of god damn mass zombie virus.
Gilgamahesh 12.09.11	I always keep a few rubbers on me jic.
BallsToTheWall 12.09.11	I don't think even that's enough, its an absolute cesspool which leads me to believe that porn is the smarter option to go with. Maybe im just paranoid that everybody's infected.
Gilgamahesh 12.09.11	Yeah man, it's not nearly as bad if you avoid skanks. But here's to porn.
Recspecs 12.09.11	Fuck clubbing, the club scene in Georgia sucks ass unless you live in ATL area. House parties here though are the fucking shiiiiiiiiiiiiiit. And if I'm correct Georgia Southern University leads the nation in STD's per year rate.
Gilgamahesh 12.09.11	Porn or a reliable girlfriend look to be your best options Recs.
BallsToTheWall 12.09.11	Not talking about colleges although I heard FSU led in that category. Either way, the world itself is one giant cesspool, I dont even know what im babbling about anymore.
ffs 12.09.11	hello im gay
BallsToTheWall 12.09.11	RIP
Gilgamahesh 12.09.11	Balls dude go out and find some innocent girls who don't have diseases and go have some nasty sex with them. That will make you feel more optimistic about mankind.
BallsToTheWall 12.09.11	Joining a pagan/Cthulhu cult would be m/
Recspecs 12.09.11	"Porn or a reliable girlfriend look to be your best options Recs." Most of my girlfriends have cheated on me so.....
Gilgamahesh 12.09.11	Become a Pastafarian. Our beliefs are more realistic.
Gilgamahesh 12.09.11	"Most of my girlfriends have cheated on me so....." :(
LegendofPittman 12.09.11	I hear the clubs are awesome in Atl, never been to one though, not the partying type. Oh also "Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see."
Recspecs 12.09.11	Yeah, I have that luck with women....looks like porn/pagan/Cthulhu cult/Pastafarian/reverting to the Christian beliefs I was raised on are the only options.
Gilgamahesh 12.09.11	Be a Pastafarian. We have a beer volcano and a stripper factory in our heaven. Plus we give the 60 day God-back guarantee.
BallsToTheWall 12.09.11	PURPLE DRANK
Recspecs 12.09.11	Weighing up options: 1. pagan/Cthulhu cult: burning in hell forever m/ 2. Pastafarian: Stripper factory/beer volcano 8=================D 3. Christianity: Pearly gates/streets of gold/virgins(?)
Wolfhorde 12.09.11	If clubs are the high quality, then what the fuck is low quality? But oh well, guess I'm way too Wittgenstein for simple pick ups I reckon.
BallsToTheWall 12.09.11	I really need more adventure and conquest, from town to town, state to state, country to country in my life sans getting shot in the knees with arrows.
Recspecs 12.09.11	Lol I appreciate the Skyrim jest.
Scoot 12.09.11	hey, i'm looking to become a bigger stud. i already have the std, all i need is you
Wolfhorde 12.09.11	"sans getting shot in the knees with arrows." That might be problematic if your "adventure and conquest" involves having "adventures & conquests" with the local women. It's similar on festivals/concerts here, though WAY less worse.
Recspecs 12.09.11	Hahahaha okay Scoot wins. Wow, how have I not heard that one?
JWT155 12.09.11	Thanks for all the jail bait pick up lines
Scoot 12.09.11	whatever helps you bag the young ones j
JWT155 12.09.11	Best pick up line has no words... Pull out cash
Scoot 12.09.11	or you know have game
Wolfhorde 12.09.11	"Best pick up line has no words... Pull out cash" Cash? I'd rather go for a high caliber handgun.
BallsToTheWall 12.09.11	Best pickup line has no words rips a tree from the earth and simultaneously curls, presses and squats it before throwing it over the mountaintop.
Wolfhorde 12.09.11	PERFORM A CABERTOSS! puts on scottish accent
BallsToTheWall 12.09.11	Always wanted to try that.
Recspecs 12.09.11	Haha people get shot in the nightclubs in my area of Georgia more then in the ATL andcas.
Wolfhorde 12.09.11	"Always wanted to try that." Hell, it would fit you as it fits my stereotypical Scottish relative. Also, it's an awesome line from the 300 rifftrax.
peaks40 12.27.11	D.E.N.N.I.S. system rules, always sunny
Recspecs 12.27.11	The D.E.N.N.I.S. system is mainly what inspired this. Month late.
FearThyEvil 12.27.11	I use to enjoy fucking.... until I took an arrow to the penis.
ShadowRemains 12.27.11	"How about we go back to my place and do some math? Add a bed, subtract your clothes, divide your legs, and lets multiply!" nice "Are you Irish? 'Cause my penis is Dublin." lol
climactic 12.27.11	2 and 5 hah
Recspecs 12.27.11	Jesus Christ people.
qwe3 12.29.11	Hi Im ____ can I pee in ur butt?
Deviant. 12.29.11	Hi i'm Andcas: youtube link
Deviant. 12.29.11	Sounds about right
ShadowRemains 12.29.11	well if it gets em dancing it's bound to make em horny
Recspecs 12.29.11	Dude, stop making out with her face and take her upstairs and show her your boner. That's what I do when I'm pretty horny.
Deviant. 12.29.11	Do you call it your boner in front of her?
Recspecs 12.29.11	Lol. That was a Blue Mountain State reference. But no, if I'm drunk I'll ramble something along the lines of "Let's fornicate you harlot."
jdennis31 12.29.11	lol, send her a dick pic
betterdrinkmyownpiss 02.11.12	don't know if anyone said this already but, "did you just fart? cuz you blew me away"
Recspecs 02.11.12	@jdennis31 THESE GODDAMN DICK PICS ARE TEARING EVERYONE APART.
YouGotLucky 02.11.12	pickuplines are for guys with no balls THE END
Recspecs 02.11.12	Dumbass user.
Recspecs 02.11.12	Dumbass user.
YouGotLucky 02.11.12	ur the dumbass 4 using pick up lines, grow some balls and ask her to fuck you fucking fag
Island 02.11.12	Dumbass user.
YouGotLucky 02.11.12	niggers
Recspecs 02.11.12	Reported so hard m/
YouGotLucky 02.11.12	lol pussy
Thane 02.11.12	wanna play a game of rape? NO! thats the spirit!
Tyrannic 02.11.12	lmao ARE THOSE SPACE PANTS?
ffs 02.11.12	kill yourself you worthless whore
Recspecs 02.11.12	"ARE THOSE SPACE PANTS?" BECAUSE THAT ASS IS OUT OF THIS WORLD!!
Zorak 02.11.12	I forgot about this list. lol so full of win
Uranium 02.11.12	one time i fucked this super model... jealousy...
BallsToTheWall 02.11.12	I have a thing for tall girls. There's this 5'11 6'0 girl at my local bookstore up north.
Masochist 02.11.12	Everything I know about picking up chicks I learned from Weird Al: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RZTosuZEm5g
Recspecs 02.12.12	I'm 6'3, so I can appreciate a taller woman. Long legs are sexy as fuck to me.
Funeralopolis 02.12.12	Lol I just came from an hour of debating religion holy shit this thread is so chill.
Recspecs 02.12.12	Hell yeah it's chill. Hit my first blunt tonight for the first time in two months.
Recspecs 10.26.12	Bump because that other guy's list sucks.
Scoot 10.26.12	"i'd whip it out but you look too cute with both eyes"
Recspecs 10.26.12	Scott Krasman: POON GOON
gpul67 04.14.15	personal favourite (though never used it) You have eyes like spanners. When I look in to them, my nuts tighten. http://guaranteedpickuplines.com/
zakalwe 04.14.15	A classic spin on the stars in your eyes one is. "Is your dad a theif? I think I raped him in prison."
Deviant. 04.14.15	Nice bump bro. But in the spirit of this thread: Man: "If I Were A Superhero, guess which one I'd be" Woman: "I don't know. Superman, Batman?" Man: "Your Man"
TheCollectiveFacade 04.14.15	some extremely pathetic people on this site (well internet in general)
henryChinaski 04.14.15	Thanks for the laugh!
Sowing 04.14.15	"some extremely pathetic people on this site (well internet in general)" take a joke?
TheCollectiveFacade 04.14.15	i will next time i see one remotely funny
TheCollectiveFacade 04.14.15	btw whats the view on 10?
nakedwesmile 04.14.15	This girl told me that she wouldn't sleep with me if I was the last person on Earth. If I was the last person on Earth, she wouldn't have a choice in the matter.
Flugmorph 04.14.15	8 is Instant win
MattTD 04.14.15	The only thing you should be picking up tonight is the Holy Bible god bless
Recspecs 04.20.15	God I was a loser four years ago