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User
Reviews 27
Approval 95%
Soundoffs 93
News Articles 11
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Album Edits 116
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Last Active 09-25-21 12:42 pm
Joined 09-19-10
Review Comments 7,895
| HARDKUISS: DAY ONE - POWER PULL
Itās the list that every sput user from Col10 to Colton99 has been waiting for: Hardkuiss unlocks the gate to the muscle farm and takes you out to pasture with your favourite gymcel, Butkuiss, soundtracked by some cult hardcore and metal selections.
A six day modified PPL routine, Hardkuiss is not designed for swift strength progression, optimum hypertrophy, nor cardiovascular fitness. Hardkuiss countenances no gloves, no wrist wraps, no lifting belts and no spotters. Hardkuiss serves one purpose and one purpose only: to deconstruct you mentally and physically over the course of a 60-90 minute workout (your tempo, as a slightly friendlier J.K. Simmons may say, is your own business) until your only pleasures in life are in big riffs, big feeds, and big lifts.
So pour yourself a double espresso, dump in a teaspoon of creatine, and join me in submission to The Iron for as many sets as you can stand. | | 1 |  | Incendiary
Thousand Mile Stare
EXERCISE ONE: DEADLIFTS
1x3
Jon Por Birgisson once said that there is no reason to be alive if you cannot do deadlift. I can think of at least three others (halal snack packs, the breakdown in Boneyards, and my instagram algorithm serving me a constant stream of muscle mommies), but nevertheless, thereās still a reason we start the week with these suckers. Today weāre pulling conventional stance, mixed grip: hook has its place, but this isnāt a comp and I value the grip strength training. You can also pull sumo if you want I guess ā but then youāll have to constantly justify to yourself and everyone else in the building why youāre even bothering. | | 2 |  | Shai Hulud
Misanthropy Pure
After a steady stream of 3x5s, 5x3s and 531s over the years led to me feeling like I was Justin Chancellor on his first day at the office trying to count along with Danny, Iāve dialled back the volume a little on these to try and push the numbers a bit without wiping me out for accessories and the approaching leg day. Deadlifts are the only compound exercise I forego an empty bar warmup on ā theyāre just awkward and I couldnāt be bothered resetting the tines on the cage to facilitate. Instead, weāll whack two wheels onto each collar, dump the bar on the floor and do a brief set of 5 to get the blood pumping, before adding another plate and repeating. Continue in this fashion until you get to your work weight; for me, today, that means a triple at 180kg. Itās an alright set: decent tempo, not too strenuous, but my glutes and hams are still sore from my last leg day and Iām feeling a dreaded lower back pump rear itās ugly head so I tap out here. | | 3 |  | All Out War
For Those Who Were Crucified
EXERCISE 2: T-BAR ROWS
5 sets, working up to a 1x5
Gasping for air at a suitable rate now, weāre on to the next station. There are two secrets to transmuting T-Bar rows from a waste of time into a cornerstone back builder: 1) use smaller circumference plates (usually 10kg or less) to increase the range of motion in the upper portion of the lift, and 2) make sure the landmine is weighed down or otherwise secured, or else itāll end up bouncing all over the joint as you start throwing heavier weights around. Luckily, at my gym, the landmine is wedged under a newfangled Booty Builder hack machine to stop it kipping, but this occasionally means youāll have to work in with someone wanting to do sets on that contraption. Luckily, today, nobody approaches me. | | 4 |  | Speed (AUS)
Only One Mode
T-Bars are also a ridiculously easy exercise to start employing body English (not you, Johnny) on, so lately Iāve been stricter with form, keeping below thirty degrees and focusing on a full stretch at the bottom of each rep. This means weāre not going crazy with weight: weāll start off with 40kg on the bar and add 10 after each set until we finish off with a set of 5 at 80kg. Slam the weights down with a bellicose grunt worthy of a tennis player to assert dominance over anyone waiting to work in with you. | | 5 |  | Primus
The Brown Album
INTERMISSION: INTER-EXERCISE DUMP
Usually I try not to waste workout time in the bathroom. I am also unfortunately almost always unable to resist the urge to purge once the biochemical cascade kicked off by imbibing strong coffee and lifting heavy stuff starts its obscene Rube Goldberg machine ticking within my bowels. Todayās late lunch (meal prepped West African-style roast chicken with roast chilli relish, shallot and dripping gravy, roast potatoes and cabbage/carrot salad with orange and hibiscus dressing, courtesy of Lerato Umah-Shaylorās stellar cookbook Africana) doesnāt seem to have helped. We spend ten minutes in the bathroom. Weighing myself after, Iāve lost 1.2kg. At least it wasnāt leg day. | | 6 |  | Stuck Mojo
Snappin' Necks
EXERCISE 3: PULL-UPS
4x8
I used to do these weighted, but some problems with bicep tendinitis have made me slightly more cautious about that. Iām a heavy boy (92kg is a lot on my exceedingly petite frame) so instead weāll use this vertical pull as some light pump work. Today weāre doing two sets with a medium width overhand grip, and two with a closer neutral grip. A lot of people swear by the āelbows into sidesā cue to activate the lats, but I find it helps more to conceptualise the motion as pulling yourself up by your bootstraps to really get those wings spreading. | | 7 |  | Earth Crisis
Destroy The Machines
EXCERCISE 4: EZ-BAR PREACHER CURLS
4 sets, working up to a 1x5
I donāt know whether itās the decade I spent as an altar boy and my brief consideration of taking holy orders clouding my judgement, but Iāve got a lot of affection for the preacher bench. In another life, I mightāve sat behind a different preacherās bench, but alas, today, imparting my wisdom to you from this apparatus is as close to the pulpit as Iāll ever come. The slight pronation the camber of the EZ-bar offers really helps offset any bicep aggravation on this exercise, and our biceps are already warmed up from the neutral grip pull ups, so straight into the work sets here. Getting an accurate weight measurement on EZ-bars is often hard, which, by extension, makes consistent loading hard, but I think this one is about 10kg. Adjust yours as you see fit. | | 8 |  | Judge
Bringin' It Down
EXERCISE 5: REVERSE CABLE CURLS
3x12
In accordance with my pre-established commitment to grip strength gains, weāre going with reverse grip cable curls. In addition to being a great bicep finisher, they also hit the brachialis and brachioradialis something fierce ā exceptional for building my rep as the most toxic guy in my office.
Before we can hit the set though, we need to find the right cable attachment. My gym has exactly one cable bar attachment I like, and its combination of heavy knurling and smooth bearing rotation feels like unalloyed luxury in my calloused hands. A slim, genial looking middle aged man is using it. I stand uncomfortably close to him, sucking air loudly through my teeth and stare daggers into the back of his skull. He pretends not to notice me. Once heās done, I retreat with my trophy. | | 9 |  | Snapcase
Progression Through Unlearning
EXERCISE 6: FACE PULLS
3x12, with an AMRAP dropset
I was originally attracted to face pulls because the name lead me to believe they had something to do with Nicholas Cageās dramatic apogee, but I am sorry to report this movement has absolutely nothing to do with Face/Off. What they do do, however, is serve to work the rear delts ā and mine need some serious work compared to my anteriors. I used to pull high-low, but lately Iāve been going mid-high, which I feel has been more effective in isolating the target muscle. You pull whatever you want to, but do hurry up ā itās past closing time and the owner wants to lock up now. It may be a 24-hour facility, but they wonāt let me in here unsupervised after I flooded the bathroom that one time. | | 10 |  | Lana Del Rey
Ultraviolence
WHAT I WORE:
Lana Del Rey Ultraviolence tee with Nirvana logo socks and Chuck Taylor Hi-Tops. | |
Butkuiss
09.27.24 | List is gym albums šŖš» | Egarran
09.27.24 | What a powerful list, I feel my muscles swelling, words can really be the best steroids. You almost make me think that paying for fitness is not a CAPITALIST SCAM. | ToSmokMuzyki
09.27.24 | ok but how many push ups can you do | ToSmokMuzyki
09.27.24 | all money is sin eggy | Butkuiss
09.27.24 | wtf smok is back??? | Dedes
09.27.24 | Lmao ty for reminding me to add face pulls to my regimen. I place wayyyy too much emphasis on front delts which I do love working but realistically could relegate to doing just like, an overhead press and maybe front raises (I'm told they're not the greatest but they help keep my mind locked on making light weight heavy and keep my ego toned down lmao).
I wish I understood the hate for leg day, I hit a clean set (12 reps) of 230 on squats and leg press PR's and I feel STOKED. I really hope I can hit a 400 lb squat 1 rep soon | Dedes
09.27.24 | Also def will incorporate reverse curls if they're good for grip strength, I've found that to be a big limiting factor in lifting heavy weight. | Butkuiss
09.27.24 | Stay tuned for HARDKUISS: DAY 3 and DAY 6 and youāll soon learn about why we hate leg day š«” | Colton
09.27.24 | whatās your seated cable row and incline dumbbell bench tho | Colton
09.27.24 | need to try mid-high face pulls though, low-high has been a staple for me for like, 10 years | Butkuiss
09.27.24 | I havenāt done seated cable rows in half a decade as I consider them marginally inferior to other horizontal row variations. Stay tuned for HARDKUISS: DAY FIVE to hear all about my incline dumbbell š«” | Dedes
09.27.24 | Me or him
I don't go heavy on cable rows, usually stick to 120 for a set max since I pinched the fuck out of a nerve a few months ago lmao
I do incline bench press (not dumbbell) and my bench is p meager, rn 110 (set of 12) for incline, used to be 130 at my best | Butkuiss
09.27.24 | All users are reminded that we use SI kilograms in this thread, and not freedom units. Please convert your measurements and try again! | Dedes
09.27.24 | America is my gym
Might her red white and blue barbells remind us of those who've fallen (in the squat rack) | jrlikestodance
09.27.24 | 7s so good m/ | Egarran
09.27.24 | I wonder if his comment for 7 makes sense. | Colton
09.27.24 | i challenge you to a seated cable row competition. | Butkuiss
09.27.24 | Why would I compete in a non competition lift, Colton? | Colton
09.28.24 | it's a competition lift if you're brave enough to engage me in competition, Buttkiss | Colton
10.02.24 | dude bailed after one day | Butkuiss
10.03.24 | I nowhere promised the days would be consecutive, my child. Part two is still coming. :) | Hawks
10.03.24 | 2 and 3 rip hard. Wasn't a fan of 9 sadly. :[ | Dedes
10.03.24 | You think this is powerful wait until you see my revised take on the Rich Piana 8 hour arm workout-I call it "8 hour calves session" | Colton
10.04.24 | this is weak stuff from you buttkiss. iām not even hating i just expected more from you. itās been a week | Butkuiss
10.04.24 | Only one list on the front page at a time is the rule, dear Colton | Colton
10.04.24 | buttkiss conquering his body and mind through the most gruesome biweekly workouts you've ever seen | Butkuiss
10.04.24 | Iām at the muscle farm six days a week Colton, I just donāt post a list for every workout. : 3 | Egarran
10.04.24 | The gym scene is hardcore. | Dedes
10.04.24 | He's on the Mike Mentzer routine
One session per month, 20 minutes max | Butkuiss
10.04.24 | Mentzer is a pseud Iām more of a Frank Zane guy ššš | Butkuiss
10.13.24 | Day two up, Colton eat yr heart out |
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