Reviews 56
Approval 96%

Soundoffs 80
News Articles 1
Band Edits + Tags 66
Album Edits 146

Album Ratings 801
Objectivity 90%

Last Active 12-31-69 7:00 pm
Joined 12-31-69

Forum Posts 0
Review Comments 6,739

08.21.11 Saw GIAA08.06.11 Rise Of The Planet Of The Apes
07.30.11 m/ For Jesus07.29.11 College Apps!!
07.23.11 In-n-out Burger07.15.11 wyankeif Is Happy
07.15.11 Hp7 Mightnight Premiere, Anyone?07.12.11 NEW WITTR F*** YEAH
07.11.11 wyankeif's 2011 (so far) 07.05.11 Blackgaze
06.28.11 Leveler>>>Messengers06.26.11 Pixar Ranked
06.26.11 reppin it up bitches06.08.11 wyankeif's Hot Sauce Recipe
06.08.11 Heavy Post-rock06.07.11 Atmospheric Black Metal M/ Fuck Yeah
06.05.11 HEY LOOK A USER LIST06.04.11 X-men Was Epic As Fuck
More »

My Coach Is A Badass

a sampling of quotes from Coach Patrick (rowing coach)
Hardcore Will Never Die, But You Will

on going faster: "Picture Trevor is a pile of shit and you are trying to get away from his as fast as possible."

"Your other left fuckface."
3The Antlers

On Henry, the biggest douche in the known universe (AKA the Fiend King, the Lord of the Goons, etc.) - "Henry, you might as well just wear a beanie that says "douchebag" right across your forehead."
4Steve Von Till
A Grave Is a Grim Horse

dude walks in with a fat hicky:
"hey Ryan how about we hook up this vacuum cleaner to your neck and see if that gives you a big enough hicky."-------------
five minutes later when sam walks in with a huge hicky on his neck...-------------
"I'm going to teach you guys a lesson about getting hickies. Everyone give me fifty push ups and we will do push ups every day until they are gone."
5Scott Kelly
The Wake

after a shitty practice: "So there was one time when i was coaching my college guys and we were seat racing. for some reason they were acting like you guys were today so i picked up an oar and started whacking the hell out of the motor on the launch until i cracked the top part." (the launch is what the coach follow the boats on)
By Blood and By Earth

"aren't gingers not supposed to absorb sunlight?"

"It's great to wake up in the morning and know you're fucking awesome."
8Modern Life Is War

"Make your rowing so beautiful that i will stay single for ever. make your rowing more beautiful than women"
Spiral Shadow

"b boat needs to have more fun. you guys are never going to date with your personalities. you have personalities like kids who sit at home on Saturday nights playing video games [[or making lists on sputnik]]. and you can't even play online because you have no friends"

"Now imagine that for each stroke you're reaching back with your oar to push a mermaid in front of you so you can rate them. Now don't kill her with the oar, gently but quickly push her so you can see her. Wait, oh no. She's only a 2. ON TO THE NEXT ONE!"
Show/Add Comments (24)


Bands: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Site Copyright 2005-2017 Sputnikmusic.com
All Album Reviews Displayed With Permission of Authors | Terms of Use | Privacy Policy