|UserReviews 35Approval 91%Soundoffs 97News Articles 14Band Edits + Tags 1,630Album Edits 183Album Ratings 1002Objectivity 75%Last Active 01-19-22 1:02 amJoined 08-22-13Forum Posts 179Review Comments 35,912
|Umbrella Contest 2021 Round 9: Routine Umbrella|
2 more out and only 9 left!
The Fat of the Land
1.Link a song via YouTube, Spotify, Soundcloud, Bandcamp, DailyMotion, Vimeo... or whatever you like as long as I don't have to download something.
2. The theme this round is Dance. Music that's easy and fun to freestyle dance to, or music that requires a specific kind of dance. Moshing and awkwardly shuffling do not count as dancing. House, techno, waltzes, meringue. I'm scoring these based on how fun I find them to dance to.
3. Aim to impress me with what you pick, since I'm rating these.
4. If I know the song already, I'll tell you to pick something new, otherwise, you're good.
5. I'm going to start each new round every Sunday night (EST,) so if you're late, you're out. My 1-2 least favorite recs will be eliminated each round (1 if we don't get a lot of people and 2 if we do.)
***The winner of the competition can recommend me whatever 2 albums they want and I'll listen to them no matter the album as long as it's not impossible to find and as long as neither exceeds 3 hours.***
|2||Tropical Fuck Storm|
“Reporting of a Failed Campaign”
I feel like I'm in a submarine with these sounds. Weird modern production. I don’t know what to make of the rock elements, they’re very clean and for some reason doesn’t stand out at all. So it’s about some rich dude taking advantage of people, getting caught, and then murder suiciding himself and some reporters. I think I get it, but I personally didn’t laugh during this, which is fine because I care more about this as a song musically even more score-wise. But as a song it wasn’t for me either.
“The Great Nations of Europe”
Intro strings are always a good sign and oh yeah it’s Randy Newman haha. Oh damn it’s about imperialism. Haha, okay I’m gigging at this one. Balboa slaughtering gay Indians? Wait, that's historically accurate? What? As much as his voice is weird, it’s so confident and the piano and drums really sell this as an educational tale worth hearing, even though it’s clearly poking fun.
4/5 (Passed to next round)
|4||Joan Jett and the Blackhearts|
“Cows with Guns”
Is this one of those viral YouTube songs? Oh damn is this gonna be a country ballad? Animal Farm, but for a modern era? “Bad cow pun” okay this isn’t subtle, good, I don’t want subtle. The backing music is boring guitar, and just as I say that the trumpets come in okay. “Much cow dung” made me laugh. Oh no, not the chickens! I was entertained, but I don’t think the musical aspects were too great, so most of your score is from the engaging lyrics.
3.5/5 (Passed to next round)
|5||Black Randy and the Metrosquad|
Pass The Dust, I Think I'm Bowie
“I Slept In an Arcade”
Cool drums and guitar, and oh it’s the surf rock keys. Ah classic 80s punk, right? Did this dude sleep in an arcade? He’s gonna arrest a hooking dog? What? Wait, is he at a whorehouse or an arcade? Fun song regardless.
3.9/5 (Passed to next round)
|6||Weird Al Yankovic|
“Genius In France”
Oh god Weird Al doing Frank Zappa, but with slap bass. He’s got the mallet percussion Zappa’s known for. I will say this: the way he can progress through various sections is true to who he is parodying. And now he’s doing Zappa’s do-wop stuff. You have to admire how thorough this parody is, like Weird Al is clearly a huge Zappa fan. Though it mostly seems like Apostrophe and Over-Nite Sensation-era Zappa. He even has the Tina Turner impersonator (whom Zappa worked with on Over-Nite.) So I have a little problem with this: while it’s a very thorough parody, it’s at the expense of feeling like a well written song… which means at the 6 minute mark it's becoming a taxing listen. Oh my god he said “great googly moogly” the exact way Zappa does on “Nanook Rubs It.” “Cosmik Debris”, “St. Alphonzo’s Pancake Breakfast”, “I’m the Slime”, “Dirty Love”... it’s weird being able to pick out the songs he’s directly parodying. I’m mixed on this.
3.3/5 (Passed to next round)
|7||The Dead Milkmen|
“Punk Rock Girl”
Great guitar and bass .This is cute lyrically. Beach Boys, “California Dreaming”? Haha this is silly as hell, but also weirdly reminds me of They Might Be Giants. Goofing on punks never was so adorable. I like it a lot!
4.5/5 (Passed to next round)
Nina Simone in Concert
A cute piano piece. Oh, so it’s about a mother not wanting her daughter to fight for her rights because it might lead to her having sex. That’s goofy as fuck, I like it. And then the daughter does it anyway and it leads to having sex. Funny, feminist, pro-black rights, and most importantly charming. The way the double bass player made the audience laugh with only his instrumental is impressive.
4.7/5 (+.5 for winning last round) = 5.2/5 (ROUND WINNER! handicap (for others) of +0.5 for the next round)
Hooray For Boobies
Welp this is cringy from the get go and sampling 80s pop. This is very annoying vocally and maybe also musically. Now it reminds me of nu-metal, but in a bland kinda way. A sample of the chorus of “Relax” by Frankie Goes to Hollywood is the chorus? Pac-Man is high on crack? This is trying too hard. The sample of Homer Simpson saying “holy macaroni” over and over is awful. Also, why dedicate a song to the deceased Falco and sample Frankie instead? I liked nothing about this song, but I guess it didn’t give me a headache.
The Lonesome Crowded West
“Jesus Christ Was an Only Child”
Folky guitar and fiddle. Weird backing vocals, but I like them. God should’ve killed Jesus earlier? What sacrilege! I don’t dislike this, but it doesn’t really stand out. Though that fiddle solo helps. Oh crap it’s getting faster.
3.4/5 (Passed to next round)
|11||Nanowar of Steel|
Stairway to Valhalla
Spanish guitar and a fake latin accent, okay. Well this is metal reggaeton alright. A genre I don’t like parodying another genre I don’t like. Okay, singing about Varg in Spanish is funny, I admit. “Con Fenriz y Darkthrone - Norwegian Reggaeton!” Honestly good concept, and good execution, I just wished I liked either of these styles of music also WHAT a “Zombie” by the Cranberries melody/parody? That’s random as hell. I can’t hate this, it succeeds too well at what it’s going for, but do I like it? Nah.
3/5 (Passed to next round)
|12||Men's Recovery Project|
The Very Best of Mens Recovery Project
Weird bass and guitar, and cool vocals. I like the “melody.” The lyrics are weird as shit. “Graduated from his private parts.” It’s funny and groovy, and makes me feel like a weirdo for liking it. Damn you!
4.5/5 (Passed to next round)
|To clarify: I'm scoring round 9 both on how much I like the song and how fun I find it to dance to.|
If it's "club music" of any art sort (techno, house, trance) or there's a specific type of dance style associated with it (waltz, meringue, swing) it'll count perfectly.
|Wow, congrats to Trifo for winning another round!|
And wow, I'm still in. :0
|for some reason i was worried you were gonna hate "punk rock girl"|
for this round i was about to rec "inspector norse" but you 2'd the album
|it was a good call ryus, inspector norse is the most fun song ever|
nice theme. lots of options, but which one would appeal to ars hmm?
|I wanna rec|
Robert Miles - Children.
But you probably know it.
|Surprised you didn't already know "Punk Rock Girl" ars, dead milkmen seem like the kinda thing you'd fuck with|
|The One by First Hate|
|uhhh do you know shack up by banbarra|
|@Slothcore: I can't even tell if I know it, it sounds like a lot of dance music, so uh I'll accept it|
@Minus: I don't, is that your choice?
|Oooooh yeah, Nina strikes again!|
Interesting theme, let's think for a second.
|Aaah dance music, I'm definitely going out on this one. But I made it to final 9!|
Mandoza - Nkalakatha
|Moloko - Forever More|
|You didn't sound that excited by my first rec and it's not very fun to dance to unless you took something and are blissing out, so I'm going to go with something that actually got me dancing when I saw her live, and I don't dance.|
Yelle - Je voux te voir, off the album Pop Up
|im assuming you know tom tom club - genius of love? |
if not, that's my choice
|I do know it, gotta repick bro|
|damn thought so haha|
that one has danceability + arscore written all over it
|It's a bop yeah, I don't know anything else by Tom Tom Club though|
|OK YES YES YES I've got it.|
Underworld - Two Months Off
(from A Hundred Days Off)
Euphoric! Classic! Love! 💕💪🏼💞🌈💖
|Still waiting on:|
|do ya know this one ars |
dancing in the street - martha and the vandellas
|Yes, of course|
Both th great original and the abominable Bowie and Jagger version
|lmao i didnt know that existed but i need 2 listen|
third try: madonna - into the groove?
|holy shit the music video is amazing. kinda love how awful it all is. classic 80s coke-fueled gay energy|
|I know that one too|
Try not picking a charting pop hit? :/
|lmao im just trying my best not to rec some random techno tune that u will hate|
back to the drawing board
|kim english - nitelife (masters at work nite remix) |
|smh ars were u never a 14 year old boy with the humour to match|
|I was, but I fell in love with Zappa that year (literally no kidding)|
|It's Operational (Avalon Emerson Remix): https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=IBvhIcrRrY8&feature=share|
|Clever choosing the only Massive Attack studio album I haven't heard|
Now all we need is Pangea and Minus
|Against All Logic - Now U Got Me Hooked (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QP5KowYeR-w)|
|If minus doesn't get his rec on time, I can technically count "Shack Up" by Banbarra because he mentioned it on the thread, so everyone is technically in, but if that's not what he's choosing he should tell me on here|
|He didn't really rec it so I think he should be disqualified and one less person is eliminated. Just sayin' I mean it's your competition and everything and all so I'm not trying to influence positive outcomes for myself or anything just sayin'😏|
|Ruthless fogza, but I think I’m counting his song anyway|
|after all, it's a competitive world|
|I'm starting now! No more changes! :P|
|for those of us who are about to die i salute me|