Soundoffs 292
Album Ratings 856
Objectivity 76%

Last Active 08-06-17 7:27 pm
Joined 09-18-16

Forum Posts 0
Review Comments 1,313

11.23.17 Happy thanksgiving!10.09.17 MUSIC ARTIST ROASTING CHALLENGE
09.29.17 Thrash Fights: Who Would Win in a Fight09.10.17 Hurricane Irma
07.14.17 Black Sabbath Openers Ranked07.12.17 REDO Iron Maiden Album Openers Ranked
07.12.17 Judas Priest Album Openers Ranked05.31.17 OFFICIAL EXTREME METAL DISCUSSION BOARD
10.08.16 Lost the roof of my car port09.24.16 OFFICIAL Thrash Metal Index Part Two
09.23.16 OFFICIAL Thrash Metal Index


A buddy of mine thought of this idea to send him a band/artist name, and he will roast them in some way, shape, or form so I figured we can keep the momentum going here. Feel free to name an artist or music group, and I will post them on the list with a roast. I will also post your roasts if you wish to join. Just thought it would be a fun thing to do. Side note: these are not personal and are just for fun. Nothing personal.
1Black Malachite
Black Malachite

What's the difference between an acid trip and a Black Malachite's music video?

The acid trip was more memorable.
The Sound of Perseverance

Godsfathers of death metal? More like the sound of perseverance through throat cancer and coked-up thrash.
3King Crimson
In the Court of the Crimson King

More like the king of one-album wonders whose debut's cover is the only thing people remember about them.
4Bolt Thrower
Realm of Chaos

Let's do the stupid downtuned Dimebag guitar tone before Dimebag was cool and take the ball gargling vocals of Cannibal Corpse and throw in unoriginal themes of war for music never done before.....oh wait...
Kid A

Generic alternative rock foundation? check. Weird ambient sounds to add to the machine-like music? check. Lifeless vocals? check. Obvious album/song titles and themes of anti-technology already done umpteen times before? check. Most influential band since the death of grunge? Wait what?
OK Computer

By Spado

Radiohead - when you enjoy having a british twink croon into your ear during pillow talk over some shitty garageband ambient. You're gay.
7The National

The national posterchild for jumping the ambient indie rock bandwagon and making overly glorified montone vocal 'masterpieces'
8Snoop Dogg

If you have such good flow, how come everything after Doggystyle is dog shit?
9Anal Cunt
It Just Gets Worse

You talk about Phil Anselmo sucking dicks while you sounded like you're choking on asshole and cunts at the same time.
10Brand New
The Devil and God Are Raging Inside Me

Nothing new here folks!
11Arcade Fire

They are way overdue for their funeral by now.

by Superluminals

Tool more like band of fools
Through Silver in Blood

The revolutionary band on how to perfect the identity crisis.
14Arcade Fire
The Arcade Fire

By Kompys2000

Oh look, It's U2 for people who think they're too good for U2!

We're going to focus more on lyrics about fucking my family and stupid alien shit instead of making good music.
A Blaze in the Northern Sky

When the 'forces of nature' sound like choking on a dick....with some black metal stuff playing in the background.
Frizzle Fry

Probably the most famous RHCP and FNM clone that isn't Incubus.
18Kayo Dot
Stained Glass

We're going to one-up Dream Theater by adding a choir and less bloat (actually, that one is a compliment but a gayer band name).
19Lil Pump
Lil Pump

Is this the white Lil Wayne with gayer cornrows or a pink and blonde bucket of shit? Either way goes
20Black Sabbath

"So for this next song, instead of just playing two notes over a four minute timeframe, we'll add an unmemorable solo and Rosanne-like whining and call it the next big thing for rock music."
Peace Sells... But Who's Buying?

By Kompys2000

Megadeth- the riffs are so good you almost don't notice what an awful fucking voice Dave Mustaine has. Almost.
22Led Zeppelin
Led Zeppelin IV

By Kompys2000

Led Zeppelin, more like the FOUR LOSERS am I right??? *goes for a high-five*
The Fake Sound Of Progress

Their progression was fake, but their downward spiral was real.
24Beastie Boys
Licensed to Ill

The Jewish white boy rap group that deserve to be banned from synagogues
No More Color

What do you get when you play overly complicated while sounding like you're taking a shit? The band that every prog. death metal group ripped off.
26Judas Priest
Stained Class

The gayer, more metallic Deep Purple
27Pink Floyd
The Wall

The Roger Waters Band whose best and worst trait was Roger Waters himself
28Massive Attack

A massive attack for sure, a massive attack on the senses through uninspired vocals, Pink Floyd meets dancey stuff shenanigans, and so trippy that you could fall over it and possibly hurt yourself.
Show/Add Comments (60)


Bands: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Site Copyright 2005-2017
All Album Reviews Displayed With Permission of Authors | Terms of Use | Privacy Policy