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Last Active 10-26-17 1:45 pm
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08.09.17 Best 3-Punch Metal Combos 06.24.17 Week Shit, with dbizzles.
04.06.17 How to become a pile of crap in 40 easy03.20.17 HORSE the Ranking
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10.18.16 User's 2016 Disappointment List09.04.16 An Evening With dbizzles...
08.05.16 BBNG last night was BADBADNOTGOOD06.30.16 3K Comments- NO BAN!
05.23.16 Preacher TV Series04.14.16 ONLY DEFTONES RANKING THAT MATTERS
03.15.16 Seattle-bound and down.03.05.16 Murder By Death Ranked
02.28.16 Saturday Night List10.19.15 Who are you listening to?
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HORSE the Ranking

In honor of the show on Saturday, I have been listening to a lot of HtheB and figured now is a good time to rank their albums.
7HORSE the band
Secret Rhythm of the Universe

I've only actually heard this once and the site average (2.4) accurately conveys my feelings about it. I haven't even rated it nor do I have any favorite tracks.
6HORSE the band
Beautiful Songs By Men

This one and their first LP are both similar in quality... not so good, man. They progressed a lot over the 10 years between this and Desperate Living.
5HORSE the band

HORSE + Pizza = Tasty. So, yeah, this is an EP themed around pizza. Not that anyone should take HtheB entirely seriously, but this is as silly as it gets.
Favorite tracks: The one about the pizza.
4HORSE the band
The Mechanical Hand

Not the best, but still some quality songs. Pretty similar to R. Borlax in sound but not in execution, imo.
Favorite Tracks: Birdo, A Million Exploding Suns... honestly don't listen to this one as much.
3HORSE the band
A Natural Death

This was my intro to HORSE. This album is really inconsistent, but Murder is easily a contender for best HORSE song- I can't say enough about how perfectly the keyboard fits into such a harsh sound without being overbearing; the build up and breakdowns rule and the lyrics are just awesome.
Favorite Tracks: Murder, Face of Bear, Sex Raptor (ohh yeah, baby), The Red Tornado, I Think We Are Both Suffering From the Same Crushing Metaphysical Crisis.
2HORSE the band
R. Borlax

Classic HORSE. This is were they found their footing but also probably where people started writing them off as a gimmick band. On one hand, the band sort of asked for being pigeonholed by presenting such an 8-bit heavy sound and even a direct Power Glove reference (looking at you, Cutsman). On the other hand, this is waaaay deeper than blips and bloops (see Pol's Voice).
Favorite tracks: Seven Tentacles And Eight Flames, Cutsman, Bunnies, Handsome Shoved His Gloves, Pol's Voice.
1HORSE the band
Desperate Living

The holy grail of all things HORSE. This is pretty much perfect from start to finish with a slight lull in the middle. This album is a goddamn gem in metalcore. You won't find anything quite like it even in HORSE's previous work. The songwriting is sharp, the production is perfect and shows the band at their peak.
Favorite tracks: Cloudwalker, The Failure of All Things, HORSE the song, Between the Trees, Big Business, Rape Escape (that fucking insane piano piece fits so well) and Arrive. So yeah, basically the whole album fucking rules.
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