AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
SCREW CHUCK NORRIS!
That crap has been around for over a year and all of a sudden everybody is obsessed with it! Make it stop!

Some more:
Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried. Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Chuck Norris instead decided to punch his way out of his mother's womb. Shortly thereafter he grew a Beard.

When Chuck Norris plays Oregon Trail his family does not die from cholera or dysentery, but rather roundhouse kicks to the face. He also requires no wagon, since he carries the oxen, axels, and buffalo meat on his back. He always makes it to Oregon before you.

One of the greatest cover-ups of the last century was the fact that Hitler did not commit suicide in his bunker, but was in fact tea-bagged to death by Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to
stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck met all three bullets
with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer
amazement.

Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged goodlooks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.

Chuck Norris recently had the idea to sell his urine as a canned beverage. We know this beverage as Red Bull.

Chuck Norris was the fourth Wiseman. He brought baby Jesus the
gift of "beard". Jesus wore it proudly to his dying day. The other Wiseman, jealous of Jesus' obvious gift favoritism, used their combined influence to have Chuck omitted from the Bible. Shortly after all three died of roundhouse kick related deaths.

To prove it isn't that big of a deal to beat cancer. Chuck Norris smoked 15 cartons of cigarettes a day for 2 years and acquired 7 different kinds of cancer only to rid them from his body by flexing for 30 minutes. Beat that, Lance Armstrong.

The original theme song to the Transformers was actually "Chuck
Norris-more than meets the eye, Chuck Norris--robot in disguise," and starred Chuck Norris as a Texas Ranger who defended the earth from dark side-dealing Deceptions and could turn into a pick-up. This was far too much awesome for a single show, however, so it was divided.

Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

Chuck Norris once shot a German plane down with his finger, by yelling, "Bang!"

The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.

After much debate, President Truman decided to drop the atomic bomb in Hiroshima rather than the alternative of sending Chuck Norris. His reasoning? It was more "humane".

Chuck Norris once went to a frat party, and proceeded to roundhouse every popped collar in sight. He then drank three kegs and **** on their
floor, just because he's Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.

Before each filming of Walker: Texas Ranger, Chuck Norris is injected with five times the lethal dose of elephant tranquilizer. This is, of course, to limit his strength and mobility, in an attempt to lower the fatality rate of the actors he fights.

Chuck Norris took my virginity, and he will sure as hell take yours. If you're thinking to yourself, "That's impossible, I already lost my virginity.", then you are dead wrong.

Chuck Norris punched a woman in the vagina when she didn't give him exact change.

Chuck Norris once tried to sue Burger King after they refused to put razor wire in his Whopper Jr., insisting that that actually is "his" way.

Helen Keller's favorite color is Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris frequently signs up for beginner karate classes, just so he can "accidentally" beat the **** out of little kids.

When Chuck Norris's wife burned the turkey one Thanksgiving, Chuck said," Don't worry about it honey," and went into his backyard. He
came back five minutes later with a live turkey, ate it whole, and when he threw it up a few seconds later it was fully cooked and came with cranberry sauce. When his wife asked him how he had done it, he gave her a roundhouse kick to the face and said, "Never question Chuck Norris."

Chuck Norris doesn't see dead people. He makes people dead.

OHHHHHH!
I got one!

Chuck Norris was on Walker Texas Ranger!






:upset:

I actually agree, Chuck Norris quotes are overrated. Those were pretty funny though.

Yeah first time I heard them.

One day Chuck was running down I-95. A Volvo ran over chuck, 16 people died.

They put chuck on border patrol in 1997 they had to take him off because every labor company went out of business.


^Both suck^ I made em up :cool:

If you aren't nice, I will post Vin Diesel and Mr. T quotes, too...

Chuck Norris doesnt use a hammer to nail thing's down, he STARES them down.

That ones mine lol.

What's that on your avi Hope Eternal?
It looks so friendly :p

what's that in your avi ryan
looks disgusting :lol:

jk :lol:

[QUOTE=RyanTheDrummer]What's that on your avi Hope Eternal?
It looks so friendly :p[/QUOTE]
It's one of stars of the VG Cats comic, her name is Aeris.

That's the Misfits drummer Dr.Chud :p

He does look a little scruffy I spose...eh dog face? :lol: ;)

Edit-Oh I might check that comic out Hope.Is it any good?

[QUOTE=RyanTheDrummer]Oh I might check that comic out Hope.Is it any good?[/QUOTE]
Sure it is. The episodes are available online at [URL="http://www.vgcats.com"]http://www.vgcats.com[/URL]. VG stands for Video Game, so it's the video game cats.

the best chuck norris quote of all time is...

Chuck Norris doesn't teabag, he potato sacks.

buahaha!!!

and...Chuck Norris' erections are the hardest substance on earth, not diamond.

On the 7th day, God rested.... Chuck Norris took over.

p00ned :cool:

ETP2!
How it goes man?

bad...i have an exam tomorrow...and im making study notes (been workin solid since noon (its the same time here as it is there) and im not even halfway through my notes:upset:...


...but on the bright side...i'm eating apple cinnamon cheerios:D

Chuck Norris woke up one morning with a massive erection and walked down the street. There were no survivors.

Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.

In some males the left testicle is larger than the right. In Chuck Norris, each testicle is larger than the other.

Chuck Norris isn't hung like a horse, horses are hung like Chuck Norris.

The only person to ever outsmart Chuck Norris was Steven Hawkings. He got what he deserved.

And time for one I made up.....

If Chuck Norris kills a man in the middle of the woods and there is no one around to hear him scream, does he make a sound? Only if Chuck Norris wants him to.

haha!!...omfg the stephen hawking one and the testicle one were hilarious i actually laughed out loud at those...lol

the testicle one was awesome, the stephen hawking one, i knew what was coming as soon as i saw his name.

[QUOTE]If Chuck Norris kills a man in the middle of the woods and there is no one around to hear him scream, does he make a sound? Only if Chuck Norris wants him to.[/QUOTE]....That was on a website.

VGCats owns.

CAD is better, though.

[QUOTE=LedZeppelin1307]On the 7th day, God rested.... Chuck Norris took over.

p00ned :cool:[/QUOTE]


Lameness.

Chuck Norris is a Christian. Therefore, he rocks more than he did before.

That's it, I'm starting a VG Cats fan club.

Aeris for president!

There is only one Aeris, and her real name is Aerith, Alas, she is in Final Fantasy heaven, thanks to that vile Sephiroth's Masume sword.

^^you need more pistachios...

EDIT: This forum requires that you wait 30 seconds between posts. Please try again in [B]1 seconds.

[/B]yay for not making sense!!!:D:D:D

VGCATS OWNS YOUR SOULS

And FFVII was boring.

[QUOTE=enemytopublic2]^^you need more pistachios...[/QUOTE]

Now isn't the time.

Aerith, Come back!

it's ALWAYS the time for pistachios...:angry:

traitor...

Aerith =/= Aeris