Ok, so if I find myself thinking, "I wonder what she would think of this" or "I should tell her about this" or just about her in general all the time, that probably means I like her, right?

I guess I'm confused because this shi[size=2]t's bitten me in the arse before, and I don't wanna try anything again or something.[/size] She's also moving about 3 hours away..

But I talk to her for an hour at least over AIM almost every night, seeing as she's the only one on that's up that late, and see her every Saturday at the very least at the Youth Group, which is how I met her. She's actually a friend of my cousin, one who's practically my sister.

I think I'm just trying to figure this out for myself here guys, sorry if I confused you. I'm pretty sure I like her, I'm just not sure if I want to like her, I mean, she's a great person, beautiful too, but I'm just not sure if I want to get involved in this, only to see her move to Richmond.

[QUOTE=Junooni]Ok, so if I find myself thinking, "I wonder what she would think of this" or "I should tell her about this" or just about her in general all the time, that probably means I like her, right?

I guess I'm confused because this shi[size=2]t's bitten me in the arse before, and I don't wanna try anything again or something.[/size] She's also moving about 3 hours away..

But I talk to her for an hour at least over AIM almost every night, seeing as she's the only one on that's up that late, and see her every Saturday at the very least at the Youth Group, which is how I met her. She's actually a friend of my cousin, one who's practically my sister.

I think I'm just trying to figure this out for myself here guys, sorry if I confused you. I'm pretty sure I like her, I'm just not sure if I want to like her, I mean, she's a great person, beautiful too, but I'm just not sure if I want to get involved in this, only to see her move to Richmond.[/QUOTE]

I think its safe to say you like her, and you cant help liking someone, it just happens. Think about it, and after a while something will happen, or you will just realise what you want to do

Yeah man, you're right.
I like her.

But she's moving in about a month..I'm confused.

[QUOTE=Junooni]Yeah man, you're right.
I like her.

But she's moving in about a month..I'm confused.[/QUOTE]
well maybe try to hav a relationship, have a good time for the time being, live in the present, and worry about that later?

Oh dear Lord.

I feel things are going right, and then POOF, my past comes back to posibly hurt me.

Girls and emotions and stuff suck.

[b][color=deepskyblue]Paragraphs are your friend, homie. Let me help you out.

-Jom[/b][/color]

sup all, havent posted in ages.. but anyways,something came up yesterday actually that i would like some advice on.. i wana see what you guys think.

So it was just a normal school day, i get on the bus, find a seat and listen to my cd player... im not too sociable in the mornings.. and well...there is this girl that ive never really met properly before two weeks ago, which is when she started riding the same bus as me. She is SO pretty, and REALLY nice person in my opinion, shes balanced i think...

anyways, i remember at the beggining of the year, i saw her for the first time and i was mouth open.... but i thought she was out of my league anyways so i didnt bother. Anyways, these past two weeks have been flirty in the bus most of the time... things like tickling, sending little kisses across, a lot of the playfull holding hands thing and leaning on shoulder stuff....it was great...but i still didnt thing she digged me or anything.. i never though nothing would happen...since "shes got a boyfriend" and all.

Well, yesterday i got on the bus after school,(there had been some flirt inside school just before) and i had my guitar started playing in the bus, then she comes in and shes like " come sit with me at the back plleeaase?" i said that i had to stay here at the front so that i could practice guitar with my friend which was on the bus, i told her to sit here with me, so she did, and i was playing for a while but it got bumpy and so i left the playing...she was like its kinda hot so she took off her sweater and i was holding her things... (no not her b oobs, her mobile and papers etc..) and so she was wearing this pretty red thing that looked so s exy, and so then she leand on my shoulder...and the i leaned on her head.. and then (i wasnt expecting ANYTHING when...) she grabs my hand and we suddenly start talking all quietly...etc etc,

we move places in the bus and so before her bus stop, i said..... can i kiss you? shes like, yea, you dont have to ask... and so i was making out in the bus with all the little kids looking at me and my friends etc... ups, sorry, i forgot to say that before, i asked her if she had a boyfriend, and she told me no...she broke up with him a few weeks ago so yea...

later at home, i get an email from her saying she though thing were a little bit fast, and that shes been hurt many times before, and she wants to leave a little more time before the next relationship... she made the first move.. holding my hand and all so i thoguht it was alright.... Im up for a relationship and all, i think i had enough one nights so... the downside would be that, since i have a band, and we wana record and play official gigs here were i live, pretty soon...im afraid the relationship will take me time from jamming and all...

I already heard many advices from friends here...but i wana hear what you guys have to say.... its always helped me... (im 16 and shes 16 by the way, if it applies to anything) cheers

[QUOTE=Dude3]
[url]http://i1.tinypic.com/rrr149.jpg[/url]

[url]http://i1.tinypic.com/rrr1a8.jpg[/url]

.[/QUOTE]
I praise you.

naco: I'm pretty sure you can have a relationship and still be in the band. If she's receptive to that, and you're receptive to her needs as your girlfriend, then you guys should be golden. A lot of the guys in R&M (ICB, for example) have girlfriends and have for the most part "serious/official" bands. ICB and his girl get on so well that they're engaged.

Now, I'm not saying get engaged to this girl at age sixteen (noooooo wayyyyyyyy, mac and cheese!), but if others seem to fare well, then I don't see why you wouldn't.

The most important thing is to talk to her, and let her know what's up. Ask her what she wants, but then tell her what you want. Work for a compromise.

Also, be weary of your bandmates giving you crap about having a girlfriend. If you still make jam sessions and practices on time, then they probably won't care. However, if you start missing practice time to be with this girl, be prepared to catch a lot of flak from them.

[QUOTE=dazmo]well maybe try to hav a relationship, have a good time for the time being, live in the present, and worry about that later?[/QUOTE]

Yeah..:chug:


Thanks man. I just needed to vent, get my thoughts straight.

I had just had an amazingly awesome night.

Krissy stayed over. :cool:

[QUOTE=Wizard.]I had just had an amazingly awesome night.

Krissy stayed over. :cool:[/QUOTE]

Is Krissy the same person as the over protective Kristen from previous posts?

Im really confused with your story Wizard.

[QUOTE=purplefeet]Is Krissy the same person as the over protective Kristen from previous posts?[/QUOTE]
Yup. I talked to her, and she understands my situation, so there's no strings with her now. But whenever I do want a serious thing, she's probably going to be the first person I go to.

My story doesn't matter anymore. It's all pretty happy right now.

is it lame that i am 15 and have never made with out anyone before???:(

[QUOTE=Dookie56]is it lame that i am 15 and have never made with out anyone before???:([/QUOTE]

No, I'm 16 and haven't made out with anyone. I didn't get my first girlfriend until 4 days before my 16th birthday.

[QUOTE=Dookie56]is it lame that i am 15 and have never made with out anyone before???:([/QUOTE]

Hahaha, nah, don't be silly.

Let's just say that there are people older than you that haven't done that. Some haven't even had girlfriends ever :eek:

Besides, you're not even at the cusp of high school. Just be patient, as tough as that sounds.

[QUOTE=Dookie56]is it lame that i am 15 and have never made with out anyone before???:([/QUOTE]

Oh not another one. No it isn't. If that's all that's on your mind, you don't need this thread. I'm 20 and I haven't made out yet. Get over it. :thumb:

[QUOTE=Chrysostom]Oh not another one. No it isn't. If that's all that's on your mind, you don't need this thread. I'm 20 and I haven't made out yet. Get over it. :thumb:[/QUOTE]

He wasnt be rude, so dont be a dick.

But to Dookie, There isnt anything wrong with it, people just experience things at different times.

[QUOTE=purplefeet]He wasnt be rude, so dont be a dick.

But to Dookie, There isnt anything wrong with it, people just experience things at different times.[/QUOTE]

I wasn't being rude. Although looking back, it does look that way. Sorry dude. :thumb:

Bleh.

Im feeling pretty bummed out today. I dont know exactly why but I think I have a feeling. So Im just going to vent out for a second. (this is probably going to be long, so bare with me here)

I dont think I ever really realised how much my past relationship had affected me. I was dating him for 9 months, and I took a lot of sh[size=1]it[/size]. I dont really know why I did, but it happened and we broke up. I moved on.
At least I thought I did.

In my past relationship (timeline wise) it was good for the first 3 months. Awesome, if you will. We got a long great, times were good. I had anxiety attack, stop drinking, stopped smoking weed. In between the 3 - 6 month mark, we fought. A lot. I dont really remember why, but we did.

In May, after 6 months, he cheated on me with a mutual friend. Sadly, I was going through some family stuff at the time, and I was needy, and I went back to him. I wish I hadnt, now that I look back on it, but it happened. We worked on our relationsip, but it was tough. Once again, the fights happened.

A few months later at a party, he was angry at me for talking to one of my friends (he had a fight with her the other day). He was smashed at this point and took me outside to "talk". At this point, he had an arguement on the street at about midnight and he punched me in the collarbone. I was pretty shocked and didnt know what to do. It all happened so fast. He then kicked me afterwards and I this point, I began to try and get away from him. He grabbed my arm, and started pulling me down the street against my will. He held my arm so tight, that it cut me open, and it bled. It was a pretty scary night with, also things involving a knife (not directed at me, but in general)..and it was pretty freaky. I left him after that, and although he repeatly tried to convince me he had changed (which almost worked at one point) I held my ground and stopped all contact.

About 3 months later, I started spending more time with a good friend of mine, that I had known for about a year and a half beforehand. We got a long amazingly. We ended up falling for each other bascially, and Ive been with him ever since. He is the most incredible person I have ever met, and I care about him deeply. We have been together for about 5 months now, and its been the best 5months of my life. He treats me so good, and I love him more than anything.

The only thing is, sometimes I feel like my last relationship affects this one. I dont really know if it does, but sometimes I feel myself getting upset or jealous with things that he does. I normally wouldnt because its nothing big ( like if he doesnt call - or if he goes out with certain people) and I really shouldnt feel this way. Consciously, I know that but I just get bummed out.

I think its because of what happened before, maybe Im just worried it will again. But I know he cares about me so much and wouldnt do ANYTHING like that. I trust him. I just wish I could shake off bad memories.

I dont know what Im really trying to get at here. But I feel a bit better getting that off my chest/mind.

[QUOTE=Dookie56]is it lame that i am 15 and have never made with out anyone before???:([/QUOTE]
Dude, I'm 20 and I still haven't made out with anyone before!

[QUOTE=Dookie56]is it lame that i am 15 and have never made with out anyone before???:([/QUOTE]

Its no big deal. I didnt make out until i was 15 too.

For purplefeet:

Well... first of all I think the thing in the top of my head is GOOD YOU LEFT THAT OTHER BASTARD AS[size=2]S[/size]HOLE. Your relationship with him was hurting you emotionally, and let's not even mention physically, which is just not right in any way.

However, I personally don't think the old relationship is affecting the way you see things in this new one: It's normal feelings you get towards someone you care about, no matter how much you claim you'll never care. It's a relationship between a boy and a girl and you expect some correspondence. It's natural, it's normal and nothing you should really worry about. It's the ups-and-downs of being with someone else. You'll have to bear them in order to live a couple brief, beautiful moments you'll share at some point.

Anyway I really think you should discuss this subject with someone close to you, whether it's a family member or a close friend, because this "violence episode" is nothing normal, especially with the violence involved between the guy and you. However, and knowing how the normal teenager mind works, you won't ask for help because you're either scared, shocked or you don't want more trouble, but believe me, sometimes the best way out something as serious as that is actually having a real discussion with someone who genuinely cares about you.

[QUOTE=purplefeet]Bleh.

Im feeling pretty bummed out today. I dont know exactly why but I think I have a feeling. So Im just going to vent out for a second. (this is probably going to be long, so bare with me here)

I dont think I ever really realised how much my past relationship had affected me. I was dating him for 9 months, and I took a lot of sh[size=1]it[/size]. I dont really know why I did, but it happened and we broke up. I moved on.
At least I thought I did.

In my past relationship (timeline wise) it was good for the first 3 months. Awesome, if you will. We got a long great, times were good. I had anxiety attack, stop drinking, stopped smoking weed. In between the 3 - 6 month mark, we fought. A lot. I dont really remember why, but we did.

In May, after 6 months, he cheated on me with a mutual friend. Sadly, I was going through some family stuff at the time, and I was needy, and I went back to him. I wish I hadnt, now that I look back on it, but it happened. We worked on our relationsip, but it was tough. Once again, the fights happened.

A few months later at a party, he was angry at me for talking to one of my friends (he had a fight with her the other day). He was smashed at this point and took me outside to "talk". At this point, he had an arguement on the street at about midnight and he punched me in the collarbone. I was pretty shocked and didnt know what to do. It all happened so fast. He then kicked me afterwards and I this point, I began to try and get away from him. He grabbed my arm, and started pulling me down the street against my will. He held my arm so tight, that it cut me open, and it bled. It was a pretty scary night with, also things involving a knife (not directed at me, but in general)..and it was pretty freaky. I left him after that, and although he repeatly tried to convince me he had changed (which almost worked at one point) I held my ground and stopped all contact.

About 3 months later, I started spending more time with a good friend of mine, that I had known for about a year and a half beforehand. We got a long amazingly. We ended up falling for each other bascially, and Ive been with him ever since. He is the most incredible person I have ever met, and I care about him deeply. We have been together for about 5 months now, and its been the best 5months of my life. He treats me so good, and I love him more than anything.

The only thing is, sometimes I feel like my last relationship affects this one. I dont really know if it does, but sometimes I feel myself getting upset or jealous with things that he does. I normally wouldnt because its nothing big ( like if he doesnt call - or if he goes out with certain people) and I really shouldnt feel this way. Consciously, I know that but I just get bummed out.

I think its because of what happened before, maybe Im just worried it will again. But I know he cares about me so much and wouldnt do ANYTHING like that. I trust him. I just wish I could shake off bad memories.

I dont know what Im really trying to get at here. But I feel a bit better getting that off my chest/mind.[/QUOTE]


Actually i know how u feel about the past relationships effecting the new ones. They really do affect the new ones. you just got to let go, becuase your with a new person.

[QUOTE=TojesDoLan]For purplefeet:

Well... first of all I think the thing in the top of my head is GOOD YOU LEFT THAT OTHER BASTARD AS[size=2]S[/size]HOLE. Your relationship with him was hurting you emotionally, and let's not even mention physically, which is just not right in any way.

However, I personally don't think the old relationship is affecting the way you see things in this new one: It's normal feelings you get towards someone you care about, no matter how much you claim you'll never care. It's a relationship between a boy and a girl and you expect some correspondence. It's natural, it's normal and nothing you should really worry about. It's the ups-and-downs of being with someone else. You'll have to bear them in order to live a couple brief, beautiful moments you'll share at some point.

Anyway I really think you should discuss this subject with someone close to you, whether it's a family member or a close friend, because this "violence episode" is nothing normal, especially with the violence involved between the guy and you. However, and knowing how the normal teenager mind works, you won't ask for help because you're either scared, shocked or you don't want more trouble, but believe me, sometimes the best way out something as serious as that is actually having a real discussion with someone who genuinely cares about you.[/QUOTE]

Yah, maybe my feelings now are normal (when it comes to my current boyfriend). I dont really know what is natural to feel in a relationship I guess because my last one was so fu[size=1]cked[/size] up. I dont know whether or not its jealously, overprotectiveness or just plain normal sometimes.

Ive talked to a few people about what happened. Usually they just say that they are going to kill my ex, and dont really offer that much advice. My best friend, the one I usually share everythign with, is moved away for a few months. So I dont have her insight, which is normally helpful.

But I appreciate your advice TojesDolan, probably the best Ive gotten in a long time. Im prolly going to get in touch with my friend who moved away and talk to her about it and see what she thinks.

Thanks again :)

[QUOTE=purplefeet]Yah, maybe my feelings now are normal (when it comes to my current boyfriend). I dont really know what is natural to feel in a relationship I guess because my last one was so fu[size=1]cked[/size] up. I dont know whether or not its jealously, overprotectiveness or just plain normal sometimes.

Ive talked to a few people about what happened. Usually they just say that they are going to kill my ex, and dont really offer that much advice. My best friend, the one I usually share everythign with, is moved away for a few months. So I dont have her insight, which is normally helpful.

But I appreciate your advice TojesDolan, probably the best Ive gotten in a long time. Im prolly going to get in touch with my friend who moved away and talk to her about it and see what she thinks.

Thanks again :)[/QUOTE]
You can call me Tojes. Aside of my abusive spam and senseless trolling, I like to think I can help someone who is miles and miles away needing of help and advice on life and stuff. :)

And yes usually having strong, big friends helps a lot to get a good laugh by talking about raping and hurting that abusive prick. Unless they act, of course. That's a much better laugh.

[QUOTE=TojesDoLan]You can call me Tojes. Aside of my abusive spam and senseless trolling, I like to think I can help someone who is miles and miles away needing of help and advice on life and stuff. :)

[/QUOTE]

Well, as lame as this is going to sound...it means a lot to me nontheless. I mean, my story wasnt the shortest thing to read, yet people take the time to give their advice and opinions. Even though we dont know each other, and know very little about each other, its still cool regardless.

I'll chip in with my two cents.

Purplefeet, it's completely natural to feel that way after an abusive relationship. It's your mind's way of protecting you so that's not a bad thing. All you need to do is give it time and let there be more experiences with the new person so your mind can let the past go, and it won't do that slowly either. It's a process and since the new guy's supportive, that could possibly happen sooner than it usually does. Tojes' advice about a friend is good stuff. It'll help you take your mind of what you see as unacceptable behavior on your part (it isn't but you probably take it as such). All you need is really more experiences together that reinforce your conscious feeling that this person is worth letting down your guard for.

Dookie56, unless you're 40 and still in the same situation, you have no chance of ever making a movie about it because that's not uncommon at all. Most people only have their first sexual experience at 16-18.

[QUOTE=Jom]Hahaha, nah, don't be silly.

Let's just say that there are people older than you that haven't done that. Some haven't even had girlfriends ever :eek:

Besides, you're not even at the cusp of high school. Just be patient, as tough as that sounds.[/QUOTE]

:lol:

To Nicole:

To a certain extent your past relationships will affect your future ones. Sometimes this is good, sometimes bad. But they will.

[QUOTE=Dookie56]is it lame that i am 15 and have never made with out anyone before???:([/QUOTE]
To be perfectly honest I think it's better if you haven't made out with someone until you're a little older than most. I didn't make out with anyone till I was about 14/15 and found my first kiss to be pretty darn good. The majority of people's first kisses have sucked. Honestly, it's not a big deal so don't worry about it :)

[QUOTE=Dookie56]is it lame that i am 15 and have never made with out anyone before???:([/QUOTE]

Dude, you've got nothing to worry about. I'm turning 17 in May and no girl has ever asked me out, I've never asked anyone out and I certainly haven't had a kiss.

Anyone have certain problems with parnoia?

I have them big time. Somtimes i dont have it but i get paranoid randomly its weird.

EDIT: I also have problems with friends meeting my gfs. I see them as seperate worlds and if they mix. Everything explodes. Does anybody agree with this? I even get mad at my friends sometimes, because they TRY to meet her. It buggs the hell out of me.

Ok, so I spend my days in school hanging out with my female friend (shes not my girlfriend) and we get along well, she does get really touchy sometimes, well a lot.
Yes, I do like her, a lot, but she just seems to ignore that, but to someone who looks at us, it would appear that we are a couple. The problem is, she doesn't want to hang out with me, outside of school, she seems to avoid the topic. Whcih is weird because im talking to her most of the time in school, she doesnt find me annoying or anything liek that, we get along really well.

Help?
I just wanna hang out with her, nothing more

[QUOTE=kevinaro]Ok, so I spend my days in school hanging out with my female friend (shes not my girlfriend) and we get along well, she does get really touchy sometimes, well a lot.
Yes, I do like her, a lot, but she just seems to ignore that, but to someone who looks at us, it would appear that we are a couple. The problem is, she doesn't want to hang out with me, outside of school, she seems to avoid the topic. Whcih is weird because im talking to her most of the time in school, she doesnt find me annoying or anything liek that, we get along really well.

Help?
I just wanna hang out with her, nothing more[/QUOTE]


Then just hang out with her, but apprently you like her. Try to look for clues that she might give you, because she might like you too.

[QUOTE=Destined_for]Then just hang out with her, but apprently you like her. Try to look for clues that she might give you, because she might like you too.[/QUOTE]

thats the thing, it seems she doesnt want to hang out.

it's come down to:

"wanna hang out tomorrow"

"nah"

thats it, she says she has her reasons for it.

:(

[QUOTE=kevinaro]thats the thing, it seems she doesnt want to hang out.

it's come down to:

"wanna hang out tomorrow"

"nah"

thats it, she says she has her reasons for it.

:([/QUOTE]


What are her reasons usually? and are the same?

[QUOTE=Destined_for]What are her reasons usually? and are the same?[/QUOTE]

she wont tell me them :confused:

[QUOTE=Destined_for]

EDIT: I also have problems with friends meeting my gfs. I see them as seperate worlds and if they mix. Everything explodes. Does anybody agree with this? I even get mad at my friends sometimes, because they TRY to meet her. It buggs the hell out of me.[/QUOTE]

Oh yea,dude. I have that problem. I think it's because I'm afraid that I'd rather not have to find new friends if we break up and for some reason, my friends are on her side. It's probably irrational but it's a huge hangup for me.

[QUOTE=ATC]Oh yea,dude. I have that problem. I think it's because I'm afraid that I'd rather not have to find new friends if we break up and for some reason, my friends are on her side. It's probably irrational but it's a huge hangup for me.[/QUOTE]


Ya one of my friends met her and it just bugs me so much. Im even thinking of him not even being my friend anymore. As u see from this example. Gfs and friends dont f[B]u[/B]ckin mix.


[QUOTE=kevinaro]she wont tell me them :confused:[/QUOTE]


Then tell her that you like her and you want an honest explaination why she cant hang out.

I know what you mean. It's scary. I won't date people that are within my circle of friends, ever. I only date outside my circle and it takes very very long before I let her hang out with my friends but hypocritically, I have no problem hanging out with her friends, not excessively, but still. It's worked out for me so far so probably, they don't need to mix.