Yeah... to be honest, that sort of thing doesn't really bother me with regard to whose name comes first. I guess if you've both put equal amounts of work into it, it doesn't really matter. I think both Lennon and McCartney had/have ego problems though...

I wouldn't mind doing something like that, the thing is my inspiration comes in periodic bursts. There's no gaurantee of me being able to write something in a month, but the next few days I might right all the time. I never know what's coming next.

Timmy P

[QUOTE=Jason101]I have to admit, I'm not all that keen on the avant-garde style... however, I do enjoy reading some of the good stuff some of you guys put up.

I think a lot of the problem is with S&L (and don't get me wrong, things are better right now than they have been for a while... it was absolutely dead a couple months back...) is that there aren't that many really excellent SONGwriters. We have some excellent writers here, most of whom have posted on this page to save my name-dropping and forgetting someone, but the popular style looking around seems to be the slightly unstructured poetry piece, usually a fairly short one as well (apart from DR's marathon pieces... :p;)) - which is fair enough, as we can't force people to submit stuff they're not happy with, but there's no real middle ground.
We've got some outstanding poets in the regs, and some horrible songwriters in the n00bs (not all of them, but posts like Varment's are typical of what we've been getting recently), but not a lot inbetween.[/QUOTE]

I agree. I don't know if I'm one of those writers you don't enjoy, but either way I feel the S7L forums are too filled with writers who just write bullsh[SIZE="2"]i[/SIZE]t on paper and have no emotion in what they write. Emotion IS writing, so take your time you "newer" guys and gals.

no, I do enjoy your stuff JH2. In honesty, I can't think of any regular whose stuff I really genuinely dislike. There are styles that appeal to me more than others, but I reckon most of the regs here are pretty good.

Having said that, we've got a couple of fairly good newbs at the moment, so lets hope they stick about. Sikotik Bunana is pretty good, even if he is a complete loon. ;):p

hah, loon he is.

so when are you posting your next piece jason?

edit: also, I'm happy to see more and more actual poetry, e.g: haikus. We should make a haiku thread so the pages aren't cluttered with 1 haiku per post. take it of leave it. I'd be happy to start one.

Other than the one I've got up at the moment, I don't really know. I'm going through a stage of re-writing old pieces at the moment... I'll see what reaction the one I've got up gets and then decide whether to stick or twist, as it was.

[QUOTE=SikotikBunana]drumass04, why not try sonnets too? You can even make up your own rhyme schemes...[/QUOTE]

Most sonnets have some sort of set rhyme scheme. There are different types of sonnets, Shakespearean, Petrarchian, etc. The schemes kind of seem offbeat, but that's how they did it back in the day.

Dude, please don't remind me. Had enough of that in the "education" system. Alls I'm sayin iz... Try making a set rhyme pattern - something you can work with, and then write something to that... You'll be making the rules yourself, you rebel you...

[quote]Yeah... to be honest, that sort of thing doesn't really bother me with regard to whose name comes first. I guess if you've both put equal amounts of work into it, it doesn't really matter. I think both Lennon and McCartney had/have ego problems though...[/quote]Yeah, the fact that ownership is even an issue is bad news for a band I think. On one hand, you might just be claiming what's rightfully yours, but on the other hand it's like you're stepping away from the band, or trying to elevate yourself above the others. I would just be glad something I wrote is being put to music, and if anybody wanted to know the truth then all they'd have to do is ask.

And a haiku thread would be cool. Actually, a thread for poetic forms (sonnet, haiku, tanka, villanelle, etc.) would be nice; just something to acknowledge the difference between song lyrics and poetry, you know? I doubt it'll work, though. Poetry or not, everybody still wants crits.

[QUOTE=slackjaw]Yeah, the fact that ownership is even an issue is bad news for a band I think. On one hand, you might just be claiming what's rightfully yours, but on the other hand it's like you're stepping away from the band, or trying to elevate yourself above the others. I would just be glad something I wrote is being put to music, and if anybody wanted to know the truth then all they'd have to do is ask.

And a haiku thread would be cool. Actually, a thread for poetic forms (sonnet, haiku, tanka, villanelle, etc.) would be nice; just something to acknowledge the difference between song lyrics and poetry, you know? I doubt it'll work, though. Poetry or not, everybody still wants crits.[/QUOTE]

If we had a seperate thread for poetry then josh may,subtle, Dfelon and others would never get the praise their stuff deserves. While joshmay is the straight up poet, subtle and D's stuff straddles the imaginary line between poetry and lyrics and their works could go either way. In my eyes, lyrics and poetry are interchangable terms. I'm pretty sure i could even manage to put my haiku diary to music and have it sound good. Very little poetry couldn't be put to music if you tried hard enough (excepting the weird forms and shaped visual pieces) and on the flipside the best lyrics tend to have a poetic quality to them.

A Haiku, Sonnet, etc type thread will work I think. I mean as long as everyone gives helpful critiques or even just praise for the work in there. If it gets out of hand it can always be closed.

ER's haikus inspired me to write something about fall. Three verses so far. It's cool when stuff comes to you immediately, because otherwise it feels like pulling teeth. :)

Edit - cool man, make one. I won't be able to post much right away, but it'll be cool to see.

Now watch it tank like the Flash thread, ahaha. :)

sigh, I hope it doesn't.

So I went to a tattoo place and showed the owner some of my artwork today and he said he'd be willing to do like an apprenticeship, but I have to drop something like five grand for the materials and other stuff. ... hm.

I'd like to, but that's a crazy amount of money.

Ohhh. You wanna start tattin'?

Can you make a reasonable living off of it? I havent looked into the wages and such.

Well is $5000 too much to make back in the amount of time you'd like? If you're gonna shell out 5 grand for tools and stuff then make sure you stick with it for a while.

I'm sure you can make a decent wage after you get the hang of it. It's not so much about making the money back as it is coming up with that kind of cash. And there's really no guarantee that the apprenticeship will be worth the money, but I guess there's no other way around it.

And I'll get free tattoos. :)

You can always sell sperm.

But do you really want to wonder, for the rest of your life, whether or not you you may or may not have other kids running around the world?

Who knows. Your son could be dead.

[QUOTE=metaliq]You can always sell sperm.

But do you really want to wonder, for the rest of your life, whether or not you you may or may not have other kids running around the world?

Who knows. Your son could be dead.[/QUOTE]

That is the harshest headfu[SIZE="2"]c[/SIZE]k of a post i've ever seen.

Kudos sir!:chug:

Sell a kidney. Who needs two anyway?

[QUOTE=metaliq]You can always sell sperm.

But do you really want to wonder, for the rest of your life, whether or not you you may or may not have other kids running around the world?

Who knows. Your son could be dead.[/QUOTE]

What would be awesome is if a whole village of women wanted to have a baby through the tube as it were all your sperm was shipped over to them. You turn up to the village like 16 years later and everyone looks like you.

That would be freakishly scary. The sort of thing you see in horror movies!

Timmy P

[QUOTE=deathscreamingsheep]What would be awesome is if a whole village of women wanted to have a baby through the tube as it were all your sperm was shipped over to them. You turn up to the village like 16 years later and everyone looks like you.[/QUOTE]


But would you weap when a country, say Canada, decides that your genes are too much of a threat and commits genocide on that village? Would part of you die?

And that would screw over future generations. Especially if all of them were boys.


Yet just another reason on why one should not donate sperm.

I've finished my prose project. It's a re-telling of my experiences during my father's wedding (he committed suicide about 2 years ago.) It's been incredibly difficult to write, but I've finally done it :)

Still thinking about adding more into it though.

Timmy P

Anyone is surprised of how Burt hasn't come around in a while?

:eek:

...

I miss how he's like harsh to us but kinda likes us in a way.

Who's Burt?

[I]Sub-question:[/I] I've recently been assigned to write a Satire for my Senior English class and I'm curious to know what topic I should write on. It should involve something going on in our society today, or something to do with politics.

We read "A Modest Proposal" by Jonathan Swift, which is one of the more disturbing/comedic satires I've ever read. I'd suggest it for a good read, it's short and entertaining. Anyway, anyone have an idea on what to write about?

EDIT: Link to his piece if you're interested:
[url]http://art-bin.com/art/omodest.html[/url]

I wrote a pertty decentbad satirical essay. Ill post it here. It is Copyright by me, so dont commit plagurism. My name be Tyler T. That shoudl suffice enough. Paragraphs couldnt be tabbed in so I just hit enter twice... it's short and mediocre. Haha.


One Subtle Opportunity

Some statistic provides that a percentage of limbs are improperly disinfected pre and post severing in third world countries. This issue lays host to an array of problems, including death. As death tolls rise, leaders of these countries continue to expound upon what can only be described as a Sisyphean task. The only solution to this epidemic is, as it seems, to construct robots via alchemy that remove organic limbs and promptly install newly issued automail, which, in effect, increase productivity and reduce fatalities.

Although alchemy is seemingly arcane in third world countries, a simple proposal will provide enough evidence to support the adaptation of such a renounced science if only we simply claim that it was our own path to success. If a worker unpretentiously loses a single limb, a minimum of 25% of that worker’s efficiency will be lost due to the missing appendage, but if that limb was replaced with a mechanical arm or leg, also known as automail, their total output could possibly rise. With robots transmuted from common sand and iron that autonomously mend, the fatality rate will drop as well for it is common knowledge that robotic precision is much more renowned than a common peasant’s handiwork.

A simple observation will convince anyone that robots are the magic bullet to help poverty stricken countries increase productivity and reduce the death rate among those with lost limbs. Now, if only we could optimize the restrictions on procreation, the real problem would start to see a resolution.

[QUOTE=metaliq]I wrote a pertty decentbad satirical essay. Ill post it here. It is Copyright by me, so dont commit plagurism. My name be Tyler T. That shoudl suffice enough. Paragraphs couldnt be tabbed in so I just hit enter twice... it's short and mediocre. Haha.


One Subtle Opportunity

Some statistic provides that a percentage of limbs are improperly disinfected pre and post severing in third world countries. This issue lays host to an array of problems, including death. As death tolls rise, leaders of these countries continue to expound upon what can only be described as a Sisyphean task. The only solution to this epidemic is, as it seems, to construct robots via alchemy that remove organic limbs and promptly install newly issued automail, which, in effect, increase productivity and reduce fatalities.

Although alchemy is seemingly arcane in third world countries, a simple proposal will provide enough evidence to support the adaptation of such a renounced science if only we simply claim that it was our own path to success. If a worker unpretentiously loses a single limb, a minimum of 25% of that worker’s efficiency will be lost due to the missing appendage, but if that limb was replaced with a mechanical arm or leg, also known as automail, their total output could possibly rise. With robots transmuted from common sand and iron that autonomously mend, the fatality rate will drop as well for it is common knowledge that robotic precision is much more renowned than a common peasant’s handiwork.

A simple observation will convince anyone that robots are the magic bullet to help poverty stricken countries increase productivity and reduce the death rate among those with lost limbs. Now, if only we could optimize the restrictions on procreation, the real problem would start to see a resolution.[/QUOTE]

Hah, not bad, my friend.

Maybe that can spark something?

I have been listening to a lot of The Receiving End of Sirens. A lot a lot.

Now City of Caterpillar came on!

Burt = Subtledagger

Random internet moderator. Cool guy.

Anyways, the essay is good. It's incendiary but recquires a bit more of punch and racism to pump it up.

[size=7]: P[/size]

(randomly butts into whatever conversation/s is/are going on...)

Hey guys...I just posted a new piece.. It's a ****ty freewrite for my writing class (which is about all I post nowadays) ... you should crit it :thumb:

thanks again slackjaw... cheers :chug:

Does anyone listen to The Receiving End of Sirens? Hm. Here are a couple of their lyrics.

[b]The Receiving End of Sirens - "...Then I Defy You, Stars"[/b]

The apparitions tango to the sound of their heels tapping,
A procession of prosthetics limbs and mannequins.
They’re all perfect models of imperfection
With a marrow made of cellophane.
Strap on your ballroom best.
Breath in and don’t exhale.
Oh, Juliet! Oh, Juliet! Deny your name your father.
Rearrange the cells that form my skin.
See them through kaleidoscope eyes
Because everybody feigns sometimes.
Blur your eyes,
Romeo.
Bend the line
Romeo
Do you like what you see!
Oh Romeo
Where art thou?
I’ve dressed up this canvas skin’ painted something colorful just for you.
Self-inflicted surgery is now routine.
It erases all traces of faces we have all known; we have all owned.
Stretch me over this
Two by four skeleton


[b]The Receiving End of Sirens - "Broadcast Quality"[/b]

How'd you know to find me here?
Tipped off you tiptoed to the tune of tapped wires and insider information.
This manifested destiny you think you can bestow on me,
An epidemic with allure that brings intrigue to the dullest minds.

"Fix your broken eyes on me," she said
As she draped her arms around my neck.
But her wrist felt just like rope
As they grazed my neck,
And her fingers, like spiders, spun a web my body couldn't shed.

And on the eve of battle I'll lay these arms to rest.
Have my subordinate coordinates finally turned themselves in?
Transmitted, encoded, but encryptions have eroded.
Now my whereabouts are living in the airwaves thanks to me.

As their signal tested broadcast quality.

Her fingers, like spiders, spun a web my body couldn't shed.

I've listened to them for like eight months. Good stuff.

What sort of music do they play? I might check them out.

They are mainly post-hardcore. When I hear Between the Heart and the Synapse, I think of Vheissu. If you IM me, I can send you the cds.

[QUOTE=Sloth](randomly butts into whatever conversation/s is/are going on...)

Hey guys...I just posted a new piece.. It's a ****ty freewrite for my writing class (which is about all I post nowadays) ... you should crit it :thumb:

thanks again slackjaw... cheers :chug:[/QUOTE]

Hopefully you find it useful. I thought I might've been too harsh. :smash:

With critiquing you never can be too harsh.

God, I really do love the new lot...

[QUOTE=bass_apprentice]Holy **** you guys are all douche bags i just wanted help. Up yours dicks![/QUOTE]

That's what becomes of telling someone to read the rules *shakes head in despair* The youth of today!!


I've also decided I have a strange addiction to Swedish meatballs. They are absolutely heavenly.

Timmy P

lol, personally i hate swedish meatballs
and could someone pls crit my piece entitled "ive got a thing about recycling you", its had like 60 views and only 1 post let alone a crit

I'll go have a look, even though you don't like Swedish meatballs :p

Timmy P