[QUOTE=Aakon_Keetreh]Thats what i hate the most, that Its all out of my control. Its been so hard for me. Ive been crying for like 20 mintues straight. Ugh. And i dont know what will calm me down. Im listening to some pink floyd but its making me more sad. Its so hard. I love her with all my heart. Were perfect for each other. It makes me sad that i cant save this relationship. I want control of it but i cant.[/QUOTE]

Give this a shot:

[url]www.umm.edu/sleep/relax_tech.html[/url]

Progressive relaxation can help relieve alot of the physical pressure stress can cause on the body.

[QUOTE=EinzingerIsGod]Give this a shot:

[url]www.umm.edu/sleep/relax_tech.html[/url]

Progressive relaxation can help relieve alot of the physical pressure stress can cause on the body.[/QUOTE]


I cant stop crying. This so hard for me. Thanks for the relaxing stuff though.

ok quick question
my gf is acting really clingy all of a sudden
how do i tell her to back off without starting a fight?:confused:

punch her in the face

[QUOTE=I feel Like a Hat]punch her in the face[/QUOTE]


I wish i could ban you. Actually try to help people.

[QUOTE=I feel Like a Hat]punch her in the face[/QUOTE]
your mean you know that :angry:
i still need help

fine don't punch her, see if i care

[QUOTE=Aakon_Keetreh]I cant stop crying. This so hard for me. Thanks for the relaxing stuff though.[/QUOTE]

No problem. Give it a shot, it might help the crying and whatnot. There are guided meditation cds that are very useful as well if you're just getting into meditation and stuff. I could send you one that I find useful if you're interested.




To bumblebee just explain it to her in the nicest way possible. The longer you let it wait the worse it could get so best off to preempt it before it gets any worse.

[QUOTE=EinzingerIsGod]


To bumblebee just explain it to her in the nicest way possible. The longer you let it wait the worse it could get so best off to preempt it before it gets any worse.[/QUOTE]
thanks
:)

to i feel like a hat: buttface:angry:

[QUOTE=EinzingerIsGod]No problem. Give it a shot, it might help the crying and whatnot. There are guided meditation cds that are very useful as well if you're just getting into meditation and stuff. I could send you one that I find useful if you're interested.




To bumblebee just explain it to her in the nicest way possible. The longer you let it wait the worse it could get so best off to preempt it before it gets any worse.[/QUOTE]


I would love one.

I have a big problem :s

Right, so i've been with my girlfriend for 8months now and everything great. We were really in-love. We had like two arguments that were real bade and we had are 3rd on friday. I hurt her and said she didn't seem like she cared about me.

Through the argument she said it felt like we were fading and falling apart. Anyway i give it two days and decide to talk to her about everything. It took 5hours but i did it and she siad some hurtful things to me. But we argeed if we argue again then while split up. We said to put the arguments and everything behind us.

But now it seems we started again, she wont say anything nice and everything is a joke. She'll only say she loves me after shes gone and thats a 'love ya' kind of thing. Do i have to win her over again? i need abit of help

Thanks.

[QUOTE=bumblebeebass]to i feel like a hat: buttface:angry:[/QUOTE]

:lol:

[QUOTE=Gackt]I have a big problem :s
Through the argument she said it felt like we were fading and falling apart. Anyway i give it two days and decide to talk to her about everything. It took 5hours but i did it and she siad some hurtful things to me.[B] But we argeed if we argue again then while split up.[/B] We said to put the arguments and everything behind us.

But now it seems we started again, she wont say anything nice and everything is a joke. She'll only say she loves me after shes gone and thats a 'love ya' kind of thing. Do i have to win her over again? i need abit of help

Thanks.[/QUOTE]

to the boldface sentance: im not sure that would have been my plan of attack. who [I]doesnt[/I] have a fight in a relationship? and your only on your 3rd one? it seems you just kind of spelled out the relationships doom.

what i would do in your situation: dont beat around the bush. ask her straight up whats up with her.

my $.02

hmmm, I've got a bit of an odd one here - as some of you may or may not know, I'm in the process of getting divorced (relatively amiably) - I also have a 2 year old daughter, who I'd quite happily do anything for.

Now, the problem I have isn't with my ex-wife or my daughter as such, but more the fact I'm now thinking about entering a new relationship.

The girl I'm seeing is a couple of years younger than I am (she's 19), and we've got a stupid amount in common - we get on like a house on fire, and basically everything's looking good that this is going to end up as a relationship, which I'd be happy about, and am pretty sure she'd feel the same.
The problem is, she's not yet aware of my past. I'm not planning on hiding it from her, as I'm not ashamed of it, but I am worried about scaring her off when I tell her - it's understandable that a 19-year-old girl is going to be slightly freaked by a 21-year-old with a kid and a failed marriage, and I'm half-expecting her to run a mile when I tell her.
My plan of action is going to be to see where things go - if things start to get serious, I'm going to tell her, as she deserves to know if it's going to be a relationship. On the flipside, I can't see the need to tell her if this is only going to be a summer thing.

Is what I'm doing right? Any suggestions on a better way I could handle it? I'm pretty sure I've done what's right and makes the most sense, but a sensible outside opinion would be appreciated. :)

It's not something I would hold back until an important moment. I would just let it slip in casually, but put it in a reasonably positive light. "Yeah, it didn't work out, but it ended on amicable terms and all so I can't complain."

[QUOTE=Jason101]hmmm, I've got a bit of an odd one here - as some of you may or may not know, I'm in the process of getting divorced (relatively amiably) - I also have a 2 year old daughter, who I'd quite happily do anything for.

Now, the problem I have isn't with my ex-wife or my daughter as such, but more the fact I'm now thinking about entering a new relationship.

The girl I'm seeing is a couple of years younger than I am (she's 19), and we've got a stupid amount in common - we get on like a house on fire, and basically everything's looking good that this is going to end up as a relationship, which I'd be happy about, and am pretty sure she'd feel the same.
The problem is, she's not yet aware of my past. I'm not planning on hiding it from her, as I'm not ashamed of it, but I am worried about scaring her off when I tell her - it's understandable that a 19-year-old girl is going to be slightly freaked by a 21-year-old with a kid and a failed marriage, and I'm half-expecting her to run a mile when I tell her.
My plan of action is going to be to see where things go - if things start to get serious, I'm going to tell her, as she deserves to know if it's going to be a relationship. On the flipside, I can't see the need to tell her if this is only going to be a summer thing.

Is what I'm doing right? Any suggestions on a better way I could handle it? I'm pretty sure I've done what's right and makes the most sense, but a sensible outside opinion would be appreciated. :)[/QUOTE]


i think you should tell her. the more you get the know each other without mentioning it, the more deceitful you're being. whether it ends up being a summer fling or a long term relationship is irrelevant, she deserves to know the truth about the guy she's getting involved with.

i'm a 19 yr old girl & i know for sure i'd be more put off finding out that someone i liked had lied to me for however long than i would being told he has a child & a failed marriage.

[QUOTE=Jason101]hmmm, I've got a bit of an odd one here - as some of you may or may not know, I'm in the process of getting divorced (relatively amiably) - I also have a 2 year old daughter, who I'd quite happily do anything for.

Now, the problem I have isn't with my ex-wife or my daughter as such, but more the fact I'm now thinking about entering a new relationship.

The girl I'm seeing is a couple of years younger than I am (she's 19), and we've got a stupid amount in common - we get on like a house on fire, and basically everything's looking good that this is going to end up as a relationship, which I'd be happy about, and am pretty sure she'd feel the same.
The problem is, she's not yet aware of my past. I'm not planning on hiding it from her, as I'm not ashamed of it, but I am worried about scaring her off when I tell her - it's understandable that a 19-year-old girl is going to be slightly freaked by a 21-year-old with a kid and a failed marriage, and I'm half-expecting her to run a mile when I tell her.
My plan of action is going to be to see where things go - if things start to get serious, I'm going to tell her, as she deserves to know if it's going to be a relationship. On the flipside, I can't see the need to tell her if this is only going to be a summer thing.

Is what I'm doing right? Any suggestions on a better way I could handle it? I'm pretty sure I've done what's right and makes the most sense, but a sensible outside opinion would be appreciated. :)[/QUOTE]

if she's not going to stick with you, it doesn't matter when or where or how you tell her: the end result will always be the same

the same goes for the other side of the scenario

that being said, tell her as soon as is reasonably possible so you can see for sure if she'll stay or not

Ok I really liked this girl mid school year, yet she didnt really have that much of a thing for me, we grew real close over the year but I think that there is where the problem lies... She wanted to be really good friends who could talk about anything, but I wanted more. Back then I really felt that I loved this girl since shes the only girl to this day that I really cared about, I told her that I loved her a while back (it was in the midst of this stupid fight) well anyways she lead me on and it was evident, so I thought, that we should go out, so I kept pushing and she had second thoughts cause she didnt want to ruin our friendship but I was stubborn and realized a friendship would not work cause I wanted more, and to this day wanted more, well anyways she pulled a 180 decided we shouldnt go out. Of course I was pissed but I tried to keep a friendship going... that didnt work too well since once she pretty much tore me in two I stopped idolizing her being and saw her for what she really was. Over the next few months it just got worst and we had a fall out, reason being she just lied too often and was too capricious. Well she just recently went on vacation and we havent talked in say 3 months, yet I know for fact she missed out conversations etc. So recently I started regaining feelings for her, shes miles away, and I want to talk to her but I cant so I feel helpless :(. My plan is to call her up when she gets back and ask her to chill with me so we can talk things out. Any suggestions, I'm more venting and putting things in text to help sort out but any sugg. helps.

K so AW had a date and wants a second.

She plays 15yrs worth of piano ^____________^ and god she's cute.

edit: /me hope she doesn't post on here

[QUOTE=AtomShip]My plan is to call her up when she gets back and ask her to chill with me so we can talk things out. Any suggestions, I'm more venting and putting things in text to help sort out but any sugg. helps.[/QUOTE]
I can totally sympathise with you here. Been there, and it sucks. I have to say I think calling her asking her just to hang out would be a good idea. Just quickly, when you say you see her for what she really is, what do you mean? Also, do you think the time apart has made you forget about her lies etc.? If you're sure you want to make it up with her and see if anything good can come, then yeah, call her. I'm all for rebuilding old bridges (even if it's not that old) so my advice would be, if it's what you really want, call her and just hang out with her and see what happens.

[QUOTE=AtomShip]Ok I really liked this girl mid school year, yet she didnt really have that much of a thing for me, we grew real close over the year but I think that there is where the problem lies... She wanted to be really good friends who could talk about anything, but I wanted more. Back then I really felt that I loved this girl since shes the only girl to this day that I really cared about, I told her that I loved her a while back (it was in the midst of this stupid fight) well anyways she lead me on and it was evident, so I thought, that we should go out, so I kept pushing and she had second thoughts cause she didnt want to ruin our friendship but I was stubborn and realized a friendship would not work cause I wanted more, and to this day wanted more, well anyways she pulled a 180 decided we shouldnt go out. Of course I was pissed but I tried to keep a friendship going... that didnt work too well since once she pretty much tore me in two I stopped idolizing her being and saw her for what she really was. Over the next few months it just got worst and we had a fall out, reason being she just lied too often and was too capricious. Well she just recently went on vacation and we havent talked in say 3 months, yet I know for fact she missed out conversations etc. So recently I started regaining feelings for her, shes miles away, and I want to talk to her but I cant so I feel helpless :(. My plan is to call her up when she gets back and ask her to chill with me so we can talk things out. Any suggestions, I'm more venting and putting things in text to help sort out but any sugg. helps.[/QUOTE]

Ask her what she's been doing and stuff over the 3 months you haven't spoken, say you've missed her being around - it will always lead into longer conversation.
Try not to refer to the past very much, though, 'cause it'll make her think you haven't changed at all and be drawn away from you.

Just keep it cool :cool:

My own little dilemma :p Anyone ever have home-wrecking thoughts? It makes me feel so guilty.. This girl in my course is gorgeous, fun, cutest thing alive I think, bar-none. Only, naturally, she's spoken for. I can't help but picture myself being with her, but then I remember she's attached and I'm disgusted in myself.. Not much of a problem that needs advice really, just wondering if other people ever feel like this. I haven't made a pass on her or anything, but yeah.. Anyone share a similar experience?

[QUOTE=Simon__Thats_All]My own little dilemma :p Anyone ever have home-wrecking thoughts? It makes me feel so guilty.. This girl in my course is gorgeous, fun, cutest thing alive I think, bar-none. Only, naturally, she's spoken for. I can't help but picture myself being with her, but then I remember she's attached and I'm disgusted in myself.. Not much of a problem that needs advice really, just wondering if other people ever feel like this. I haven't made a pass on her or anything, but yeah.. Anyone share a similar experience?[/QUOTE]

Been there, done that. I thought her and her boyfriend were having more trouble than they were, though, and when I realized they weren't I immediately backed off. I'm now better friends with the girl's BF than with her.

I imagine you know not to try and break it up.

oh yeah! I'm no home-wrecker, like I said, I'm disgusted in myself for even thinking about it. But yeah.. Maybe I should be-friend the boyfriend..

[QUOTE=Simon__Thats_All]My own little dilemma :p Anyone ever have home-wrecking thoughts? It makes me feel so guilty.. This girl in my course is gorgeous, fun, cutest thing alive I think, bar-none. Only, naturally, she's spoken for. I can't help but picture myself being with her, but then I remember she's attached and I'm disgusted in myself.. Not much of a problem that needs advice really, just wondering if other people ever feel like this. I haven't made a pass on her or anything, but yeah.. Anyone share a similar experience?[/QUOTE]

No girl is the greatest girl in the world. Get over it. You'll find a new crush in a few weeks. Always happens. If it doesn't, ummm, kill her boyfriend or something.

[QUOTE=Simon__Thats_All]My own little dilemma :p Anyone ever have home-wrecking thoughts? It makes me feel so guilty.. This girl in my course is gorgeous, fun, cutest thing alive I think, bar-none. Only, naturally, she's spoken for. I can't help but picture myself being with her, but then I remember she's attached and I'm disgusted in myself.. Not much of a problem that needs advice really, just wondering if other people ever feel like this. I haven't made a pass on her or anything, but yeah.. Anyone share a similar experience?[/QUOTE]
been there... dont try it... she'll find out and hate you

Haha, I don't think you guys understand, I was never intending on doing anything about it. And as for "no girl being the greatest girl in the world" I beg to differ. There has to be one.. Besides, I only said she was the cutest thing alive, not the greatest girl in the world. The thing that mostly irritates me is I don't [i]want[/i] to like her. I don't want to like anyone! I'm quite happy being single and being perverted when I'm drunk and not have to worry about a significant other. Oh well, she's away for a while so I'll be fine :thumb:

[QUOTE=Simon__Thats_All]oh yeah! I'm no home-wrecker, like I said, I'm disgusted in myself for even thinking about it. But yeah.. Maybe I should be-friend the boyfriend..[/QUOTE]

Yeah man, I've found that guys attracted to a girl usually get along really well. Almost all of my friends have been interested in the girls I've dated/crushed on at one point or another.

[QUOTE=Simon__Thats_All]The thing that mostly irritates me is I don't [i]want[/i] to like her.[/QUOTE]

Meh whatever. I have been here before though. It sucks.

[QUOTE=AmericanWeiner]Yeah man, I've found that guys attracted to a girl usually get along really well. Almost all of my friends have been interested in the girls I've dated/crushed on at one point or another.[/QUOTE]

Yah, Ive been in that situation before. I ended up liking 2 of the same guys my friend had dating months (in one case years) after they had broken up and it didnt go over well.

I feel not-so-great about it now, as I dated both of them and it caused a lot of problems with my friend. Both relationships (one in particular) ended in bad, bad ways so it wasnt worth it.

That is all long over and done with though. Me and my friend are still really close but it was never worth it in the first place.

Stick to your friends. Girls/Boys come along everyday but if you can find a really good friend - leave it at that as they dont come around that often.