[QUOTE=PHAT_M0NKEE]I like that answer alot... yay for the 4-string love machine![/QUOTE]


i ****ing wish man, that would be lovely


nah but its the drummer who gets all the weird interesting ones because drummers are mad

singer gets all the slags

guitarist gets a nice mix of all of them

bass player gets **** all

[QUOTE=Ned]1) Don't play "slow sweeping string sounds". Play music.

2) Don't play in clubs with stages so small that anyone is ever "stuck in the corner facing the wall".

3) If a certain saxophone player named Mike insists on standing directly in front of you, play back the New Year's Eve tape to the band leader proving incontrovertably that Mike was taking one long solo all night long and playing out of tune the while--and get Mike's *** fired.

4) Go to the restaurant adjoining your hotel by yourself after the first night of three-night stand. Bring a copy of J. D. Salinger's "Nine Stories" with you, and while you order and receive your food, keep your head in the book and never look once at your waitress. Your waitress will be doing a morning shift the next day, and while you sleep in, the other group members at breakfast will be all over her and invite her to the club that night. She'll come all right, but only for you.

5) If none of the above works, it's not the keyboards, pal; it's YOU.[/QUOTE]


a) I'm using hyperboles to make my point.

b) Actually, here in Greece you're lucky if you're facing the corner. Usually club's so small you're playing from the toilet.

c) Who has a saxophonist in a band??????

d) If it's not illustrated, i haven't read it.

e) If all else fails, we usually end up sampling noises coming from the other band member's rooms, for private use later on.

P.S Actually we're not really as sad as all that but since it's a fun topic might as well be self-sarcastic.

[QUOTE=Diatonic Dissonance™]If you play a mean classical piano (or any slow, pretty song on a nice big piano [not keyboard]), you won't attract [i]many[/i] girls.

Instead you will attract one or two girls, but trust me - they're the girls you want attracted to you.[/QUOTE]


Classically trained......luckily i found my way later on :-)

Ahhh women. Well I just turned 27 on Friday so i think i have to start concerning myself with keeping my teeth in my mouth...finding a good pacemaker....and all those other old-age things heheheheeeeeee.

[QUOTE=daffy_]
c) Who has a saxophonist in a band??????[/quote]

One question mark is sufficient, thank you very much. A BAND will not only have a coterie of saxophonists; it may also have seventy-six trombones. A rock group, on the other hand, can (and SHOULD) accommodate a small "horn" section.

[quote] d) If it's not illustrated, i haven't read it.[/quote] She'll catch on eventually, of course, but the kinds of girls you're likely to meet in these sorts of situations aren't the kinds of girls you want to hang onto for long anyway. Just fake it.

[quote] e) If all else fails, we usually end up sampling noises coming from the other band member's rooms, for private use later on. [/quote] Ouch! The very last thing I'd want is a souvenir.

[quote] P.S Actually we're not really as sad as all that [/quote] No, it's probably much worse. [quote] but since it's a fun topic might as well be self-sarcastic.[/QUOTE] It's a fun topic it your idea of fun is sticking needles behind your fingernails.

I would say the lead singer or the lead guitarist. I'm the lead vocalist/screamer in my bad, and my best buddy does guitar and I'd say we pull the most chicks out of anyone.

[QUOTE=daffy_]Classically trained......luckily i found my way later on :-)
[/QUOTE]
:thumb:

Me and our singer were discussing this a while ago and decided that it went:

Singer
Drummer
Guitars
Bass.

Though in practice is more goes like this:

Guitarist
Bassist
Singer
Drummer (me)
Guitarist (my girlfriend... heheh)

So wait, you're getting more than your girlfriend is? unless you're counting masturbation . . .

[QUOTE=Ned No, it's probably much worse. It's a fun topic it your idea of fun is sticking needles behind your fingernails.[/QUOTE]


Or listening through a full album by Opeth :-)

whos ever hottest or has the money!! no im jk. lead guitarist for me. or drummer.

[QUOTE=Ned]One question mark is sufficient, thank you very much. A BAND will not only have a coterie of saxophonists; it may also have seventy-six trombones. [B]A rock group, on the other hand, can (and SHOULD) accommodate a small "horn" section. [/B]
[/QUOTE]

That is too rediculous for words. Whether or not it fits in with the sound they are after, whether or not it would be practical, and whether or not anybody wants to hear it, rock bands should have a small horns section?

I agree that a sax solo here and there can be extremely effective, but its just ignorant to say which instruments rock groups should and shouldn't have. some of the experimental stuff I listen to has very effective strings in it (violin and cello, not synthy noises :rolleyes: ), which is fantastic. Pink Floyd (as you'll know) have several sax solos across their mid era. However, its not correct to say rock bands [I]should [/I] incorporate these things- just that they should hold an open mind to incorporating more than electric guitars, bass and drums.

[QUOTE=Ned]A rock group, on the other hand, can (and SHOULD) accommodate a small "horn" section.
.[/QUOTE]


Only if they want to make horrible music

[QUOTE=JimMorals]Chicks like bassists because it is a fact that chicks like thundering vibrations. :smash:[/QUOTE]

Let her sit on your bass amp, and play the highest B, with bass set high, mids set low, and treble set medium.

...Wheeee....

[QUOTE=moaner]That is too rediculous for words. Whether or not it fits in with the sound they are after, whether or not it would be practical, and whether or not anybody wants to hear it, rock bands should have a small horns section?

I agree that a sax solo here and there can be extremely effective, but its just ignorant to say which instruments rock groups should and shouldn't have. some of the experimental stuff I listen to has very effective strings in it (violin and cello, not synthy noises :rolleyes: ), which is fantastic. Pink Floyd (as you'll know) have several sax solos across their mid era. However, its not correct to say rock bands [I]should [/I] incorporate these things- just that they should hold an open mind to incorporating more than electric guitars, bass and drums.[/QUOTE]

You're so unhip (and deadly boring), it's a wonder you can hold up your pants.

[QUOTE=Knifeboy]Only if they want to make horrible music[/QUOTE]

Oh, sorry. I forgot to say, "unless Knifeboy manages to weasel in".

[QUOTE=Ned]You're so unhip (and deadly boring), it's a wonder you can hold up your pants.[/QUOTE]

"that's absolute bollocks" - The person sat next to me who read what we said.

"Just imagine metal bands... '<Grind> <grind> <PARP!>"


I think the fact that some random friend from the real world laughed at you without even being asked is an indication of the incorrect nature of your statement.

actually the guy was having a bang at me. he was joking......weren't you? :-)

You poms really say bollocks? :eek:

:lol:

never mind the bollocks! we've got more important things to talk about.

[QUOTE=Diatonic Dissonance™]You poms really say bollocks? :eek:

:lol:[/QUOTE]

yes, yes we do.

Have fun wearing your "stubbies", convict.








:p

Touché!

ever hear the joke....

There was a band playing a gig and everything was going awesome, they knew theyd be big. The drummer was thinking "Oh yeah I'm gonna get so much money" they guitarist was thinking "Oh man I'm gonna get so many chicks", the singer was thinking "Wow I'm gonna be so well popular" while the bass player was thinking " ok... D - B - D - B "

[QUOTE=strummerkid]So wait, you're getting more than your girlfriend is? unless you're counting masturbation . . .[/QUOTE]

No I just get more comments etc... so yeah we are basicly equal.

[QUOTE=RyMac59]ever hear the joke....

There was a band playing a gig and everything was going awesome, they knew theyd be big. The drummer was thinking "Oh yeah I'm gonna get so much money" they guitarist was thinking "Oh man I'm gonna get so many chicks", the singer was thinking "Wow I'm gonna be so well popular" while the bass player was thinking " ok... D - B - D - B "[/QUOTE]


hahah...

[QUOTE=moaner]I think the fact that some random friend from the real world laughed at you without even being asked is an indication of the incorrect nature of your statement.[/QUOTE]

Let me get this straight: You think that a "random" person's opinion proves me wrong? You're deeply strange. Anyway, he was probably laughing at your trousers falling. None of MY friends, by the bye, are "random".

[QUOTE=Ned]Let me get this straight: You think that a "random" person's opinion proves me wrong? You're deeply strange. Anyway, he was probably laughing at your trousers falling. None of MY friends, by the bye, are "random".[/QUOTE]

He was a random one of my friends. not a chosen one- it could have been any friend.

In my experience it's always been the singer and guitarist who get ALL the girls....but then again my bassist is girl repellant and my drummer is shy.

but the bass player DID sign a girls *** once.....hmm ok so he's girl neutral

Drummers get all the best lasses, then guitarists. I don't know a bassist in my school who has had a girlfriend for more than 2 weeks and vocalists don't seem to get any around my area.

In my band it works like this:

Drummer - Has a girlfriend

Lead Guitarist - Always attract hot chicks

Bassist - Ends up stealing them

Me (Guitar/voclas)- Gets the refuse

lol the bassit always ends up stealing them the last one there is the most truest to me that ive seen except you should add second none flashy lead guitarist gets absolutly jack ****.