He swears she would have said the same type of stuff even if I had been a heaven-sent angel. He asked her why she didn't tell him when he told her we were going out the first time on the phone. She said the only reason was because she didn't want to make him sad when she wasn't there :/. I think she judges anyone that could possibly "take away" her son in a negative way. Oh, I forgot to mention that she insists he should marry a girl that is either Armenian or Turkish.UGH.

Anyway, I hope you're right and she will turn around. Most of my friends say she will too. I guess I'll have to just hope it works out :/.

[QUOTE=cokecanbunny]Oh, I forgot to mention that she insists he should marry a girl that is either Armenian or Turkish.UGH.[/QUOTE]

That's no surprise... Korean and Middle Eastern women aren't fond of mixing of bloodlines.

[QUOTE=halfdeadhippo]People like your girlfriend's mom bother me a bit. They do a perfectly fine job raising their kids up until a certain point, at which they don't want to let go. I know a bunch of parents like that.[/QUOTE]

People like that bother me too, I have an uncle who wont allow his 15 year old child to go to public school or even watch television or listen to the radio, and can only watch a small handfull of movies selected by him.

Wow... it's good to be back. I haven't posted in like... forever


Anyways...

Me and this girl have been like BEST friends for a few years now. we're so close that our friendship played a big role in ending a previous relationship for each of us. i.e. both my ex and her ex thought we had something going on
...

But now, we're both single and we spend almost every free minute we have together. people around us including our parents think we are going out, but we're not. We go to movies, hang out with our friends together, and all of the stuff i'd normally do with any friend, at my house she'd take the love seat, and i'd lay on the couch and we'll watch movies or just talk, or whatever... but lately things have been changing.

Mainly within the last week and i guess a bit in the last month, we are always sitting next to each other, either holding hands or i'll have my arm(s) around her. we've never spoken about changing the dynamics of our relationship... I've never kissed her face. i've kissed her hand once, and the top of her head. that's only signifigant because i'm terrified of what might happen to us if i kiss her on the mouth. If we start a relationship we jeopardize everything we have. and She means more than the world to me. i'd gladly die i her place, and I just can't handle the thought of losing her as a friend. i'm at a point now that i realize that either i'll end up marrying her eventually (i'm 18, she's 17... it'll be a while...), or i'll settle for a whole lot less, or I'll be single for the rest of my life.

I guess I'm just terrified of screwing things up for us, I don't know how to ask her if she's done with being "just friends"... but I know i need to ask her or i'll go crazy. so now i'll ask all of you what you would do if you were me. thanks...

[QUOTE=Jerk_217]Wow... it's good to be back. I haven't posted in like... forever


Anyways...

Me and this girl have been like BEST friends for a few years now. we're so close that our friendship played a big role in ending a previous relationship for each of us. i.e. both my ex and her ex thought we had something going on
...

But now, we're both single and we spend almost every free minute we have together. people around us including our parents think we are going out, but we're not. We go to movies, hang out with our friends together, and all of the stuff i'd normally do with any friend, at my house she'd take the love seat, and i'd lay on the couch and we'll watch movies or just talk, or whatever... but lately things have been changing.

Mainly within the last week and i guess a bit in the last month, we are always sitting next to each other, either holding hands or i'll have my arm(s) around her. we've never spoken about changing the dynamics of our relationship... I've never kissed her face. i've kissed her hand once, and the top of her head. that's only signifigant because i'm terrified of what might happen to us if i kiss her on the mouth. If we start a relationship we jeopardize everything we have. and She means more than the world to me. i'd gladly die i her place, and I just can't handle the thought of losing her as a friend. i'm at a point now that i realize that either i'll end up marrying her eventually (i'm 18, she's 17... it'll be a while...), or i'll settle for a whole lot less, or I'll be single for the rest of my life.

I guess I'm just terrified of screwing things up for us, I don't know how to ask her if she's done with being "just friends"... but I know i need to ask her or i'll go crazy. so now i'll ask all of you what you would do if you were me. thanks...[/QUOTE]

You need to tell her how you feel, thats the only thing thats going to do it. Just because you get in a relationship with her doesn't mean that you won't still be freinds if somehow it doesn't work. Being freinds for so long you can probably count on that she's always going to love you even if it is as a freind, so I dont think having a relationship will screw up anything between you guys, so no "jepardizing" will occur naturally. You talked about getting married to her... well... personally I've always beleived that its very important to be freinds with your spouse as well. Your going to be spending the rest of your life together, so you cant be lovers every second of the day, you have to have fun with eachother sometime! Obviously there is a strong bond, and that is a major plus. If things have been changing the way you said they are (holding hands and all that jazz) that she has feelings for you too.

So in short:

Get over being afraid. Nothing bad will happen. She loves you back.

So good luck stud:cool:

being friends with your lover/girlfriend/whatever is absolutly key.

Its common myth that dating your friends is bad because it will ruin the relationship after you break up....while that may be true, the best relationships are the ones with friends.

And if you guys are friends, then it shouldn't be a problem when you two break up.

So go right ahead.

[QUOTE=Seafroggys]being friends with your lover/girlfriend/whatever is absolutly key.

Its common myth that dating your friends is bad because it will ruin the relationship after you break up....while that may be true, the best relationships are the ones with friends.

And if you guys are friends, then it shouldn't be a problem when you two break up.

So go right ahead.[/QUOTE]

How is it a myth if it is true? :eek:

[QUOTE=Jerk_217]Wow... it's good to be back. I haven't posted in like... forever


Anyways...

Me and this girl have been like BEST friends for a few years now. we're so close that our friendship played a big role in ending a previous relationship for each of us. i.e. both my ex and her ex thought we had something going on
...

But now, we're both single and we spend almost every free minute we have together. people around us including our parents think we are going out, but we're not. We go to movies, hang out with our friends together, and all of the stuff i'd normally do with any friend, at my house she'd take the love seat, and i'd lay on the couch and we'll watch movies or just talk, or whatever... but lately things have been changing.

Mainly within the last week and i guess a bit in the last month, we are always sitting next to each other, either holding hands or i'll have my arm(s) around her. we've never spoken about changing the dynamics of our relationship... I've never kissed her face. i've kissed her hand once, and the top of her head. that's only signifigant because i'm terrified of what might happen to us if i kiss her on the mouth. If we start a relationship we jeopardize everything we have. and She means more than the world to me. i'd gladly die i her place, and I just can't handle the thought of losing her as a friend. i'm at a point now that i realize that either i'll end up marrying her eventually (i'm 18, she's 17... it'll be a while...), or i'll settle for a whole lot less, or I'll be single for the rest of my life.

I guess I'm just terrified of screwing things up for us, I don't know how to ask her if she's done with being "just friends"... but I know i need to ask her or i'll go crazy. so now i'll ask all of you what you would do if you were me. thanks...[/QUOTE]
Wow, we are in pretty much the same position except that my friend and i are 3 yrs younger. I love hanging out with her, and i could tell her anything. she's so fun and crazy, and she's quite unique. We hang out @ each others houses cos she lives down the road. At one of our school socials we were hanging out having a mad time, and that was the first time i liked liked her. anyway she told me she wanted to make out with someone and i was to shy to make a move so i just kept hanging out. neway while i was getting a drink she ran up to me all excited, and she said " I just kissed Joe." Joe being my bestfriend. I was pretty cut but i didnt let either of them no it, and 4 the next week joe was an arse to her so she got really upset (it was also her first kiss). So one day I was talking to her and i told her that i really wanted to kiss her @ the social, and she was like :o oh i wish you told me, i really wish i kissed you instead of him. I haven't said anything more about the subject but i felt so stupid afterwoods. I hung out @ her place last night and just talked and watched moviesand we had a mad time. I love being her friend, and i wanna see what happens for about two weeks until i confront her about how i feel.


long story short, tell her:D

Ok, so its my turn to share a problem.

Basically I really like this girl and Ive only known her for about a month but we are very close and she knows I like her and I think she likes me too. She's amazingly friendly and sweet. Basically yesterday we were going to town but for certain reasons we couldnt. On MSN I told her I was going to ask her out today and I couldnt wait another day and asked her. I told her obviously she didnt have to answer me there and then and I said that I do hope I wasnt rushing things.

She said she thought I liked her and basically said that I would have to wait for my answer. Basically my theory is that if she liked me that much she would have said yes surely, not 'I need to think about things'?

sup guys....long time....

well lately i ran into a little scenario here..

It all happened when 2 months ago, this really hot girl (hotest in our grade) started taking the bus service, and so she started taking my bus.. Well i didnt really know her and at the beginning of the year i was considering getting to know her better...but i realised my very good friend beat me to it and soon they liked each other... and well i always say friendship first... and i didnt wana mess around there too much and i lost interest... but when she came into the bus...i was this joky, humorous, sunshine of the day with everyone on that bus, and a flirty guy with her.. there was another guy like me but i beat him in the competition... and well as days went by... a lot of tickling...a lot of flirting... touching.... wrestling (haha) and all that happened between me and her.... now at this point i knew she had a boyfriend and well, i wasnt trying to get her with me or anythng, its just the way i am.... 2 weeks after she joined my bus....we knew each other better i guess....afterschool on the bus i took my guitar and i was playing here and there and she came to sit next to me and she was wearing this really pretty red top.. (there had been some flirting on the school before) and well i put my guitar down and i find myself talking with her.... all of a sudden, she puts her head on my shoulder...i thoguht it was normal since she has done it before.... so i kept talking and then.. she takes my hands which were sitting on my lap.. and im like oooookkkkk.....and well i realised what was kinda happening and played along... i put my head over her head... she kissed my hands a couple of times and all that...later on...her bus stop was coming... then i said to myself, if you have a chance with this girl, the chance is now, so i asked her, hey, i thoguht you had a bf? shes like no, we broke up 10 days ago.. so i asked her if i could kiss her and shes said yea, you dont have to ask sweety and i kissed her... then she left and i started thinking, and i came to the conclusion that i wouldnt wrap myself around this becasue if she didnt like me, i wouldnt like to get disapointed, she sent me an email saying that she had just broken up, and has been hurt many times, and she needs some space and time, and that she wont be so clingy towards me as before for a while, so im like ok no problem, take your time... weeks passed and i broke my promess, i was falling for this girl she wasnt only hot, but i loved the way she was, and the way she smiled, so bad, like ive never fallen to a girl before, my day good, or bad, would depend if we talked in school, if we hugged or dint hug, if we flirted or didnt.... i had good days and i had very bad days, and holidays came and i didnt talk to her at all... and i tried doing some really sweet things to her, like i had a concert and i sang a song, and i was gona call her onstage and dedicat e the song to her on the phone but i called before in the intermission to make sure she pick up her phone and well she didnt answer, (when i told her what i was gona do...back at school, she teared and went red and said sorry and all that, you should have seen her face) when the holidays finished first day of scvhool.... things changed.... i didnt know why...but we werent talking as much and things got all weirerder.. to make the long story short....yesterday i realised i changed my personality after that day in the bus, i wasnt the sunshine of the day....i always ran out of jokes and humor.... and i came to realised if we kissed, then she liked me for the way i was before, and ive changed a lot, sometimes im pissed on the bus and althogh i know pissed off is a turn off... i cant really control it... sometimes i wished i never kissed her...and we would still be flirting... and joking... and all that i really missed.... ive never been in this position before and im 16, ive always been those kinda one night guys, and when this came up, i dont wana leave it.... i hate feeling like this... im ot one of those emo sentimental guys, dont get me wrong... but today im feeling like this...

thats my story,

i came to ask.... what if by tommorrow i turn myself to the way i was with her? would it be a good idea?

do you guys/girls think i still have a chance?


thanks cheers

ok you definently have a chance:p she wanted you to kiss her, and so we can conclude that she did like you. start playing your guitar artound her again, joke more, just be happy and more relaxed, it sounds like atm you are trying to hasrd, and she is probably really confused. I dont think its so much "turning yourself into the way you were with her" but more " act more like the guy who is himself, and isn't basing his life around impressing someone." Be happy, make jokes, and if you find yourself @ a loss, thenplay guitar, sing, talk, tell her your problems, be there for her, just be a good friend. because even though you may date in the future the best thing you can do atm is be her friend.

[QUOTE=Seafroggys]Its common myth that dating your friends is bad because it will ruin the relationship after you break up....while that may be true, the best relationships are the ones with friends.

And if you guys are friends, then it shouldn't be a problem when you two break up.

So go right ahead.[/QUOTE]

Noooooooooooooooooooooooooo.

Well, I disagree, anyway. I don't know a single person in my life who dated one of his/her friends, broke up with them, yet had no problems after they broke up and just went right back to being friends as if nothing ever happened.

[QUOTE=Jerk_217]I guess I'm just terrified of screwing things up for us, I don't know how to ask her if she's done with being "just friends"... but I know i need to ask her or i'll go crazy. so now i'll ask all of you what you would do if you were me. thanks...[/QUOTE]

I don't think its a bad thing to date a girl you're good friends with. I had been friends with my current girlfriend for about a year through mutual friends (her best friends were two of the girlfriend's of kids in my band). So we would always be hanging out in group situations and this past winter started to talk more on AIM and such. I didn't think anything of it until her friend suggested that I pursue things further. I figured I'd give it a shot even though I considered her to be out of my league, but surprisingly enough she was interested and the rest is history so to speak.

Basically I think you should go for it if you have these feelings for her. At least tell her how you feel.

[QUOTE=Yppolitia]Ok, so its my turn to share a problem.

Basically I really like this girl and Ive only known her for about a month but we are very close and she knows I like her and I think she likes me too. She's amazingly friendly and sweet. Basically yesterday we were going to town but for certain reasons we couldnt. On MSN I told her I was going to ask her out today and I couldnt wait another day and asked her. I told her obviously she didnt have to answer me there and then and I said that I do hope I wasnt rushing things.

She said she thought I liked her and basically said that I would have to wait for my answer. Basically my theory is that if she liked me that much she would have said yes surely, not 'I need to think about things'?[/QUOTE]
Did she say she'll have to think about things, or did she just say you'll have to wait for your answer?

I like a girl who likes me.


She has a boyfriend at the moment.

Hows that work ?

[QUOTE=rocknrollstar]I like a girl who likes me.


She has a boyfriend at the moment.

Hows that work ?[/QUOTE]


Eventually you get her to leave him...with Liz I didnt know she was with someone until a week later...she has to choose.

[QUOTE=Tillius]Did she say she'll have to think about things, or did she just say you'll have to wait for your answer?[/QUOTE]
Both. She said she will have to think about things first then 10-15 mins later she said I will have to wait for my answer.

[QUOTE=Yppolitia]Both. She said she will have to think about things first then 10-15 mins later she said I will have to wait for my answer.[/QUOTE]


Obviously this is a terrible sign and is not good at all for you.

That kind of thing is something someone doesnt sit around and debate, if its mutual at all its a pretty quick yes or no.

[QUOTE=Tiger]Obviously this is a terrible sign and is not good at all for you.

That kind of thing is something someone doesnt sit around and debate, if its mutual at all its a pretty quick yes or no.[/QUOTE]
Yeah I thought so.

Okay, here's my tale...it's rather complex.

I live in Las Vegas, I go to boarding school in New Hampshire. When I went back home last November for a vacation I came home to the funeral of one of my better friends, which was really devastating. Another really good friend of mine, who was the pallbearer at the funeral, brought his girlfriend along for support (he needed it...). He had been ranting and raving to me for weeks about how amazing she was, and for a while I thought he was just whipped out of his mind.

He introduced us both, and we quickly became great friends. We share common passions and common problems. We talked about everything, and, as it turns out, her and my friend's relationship was really rocky. They broke up a few months ago.

However, since they broke up I've just been totally lost to her - I haven't felt this emotionally attached to someone since my last big-time relationship, which ended painfully to say the least. I'm pretty sure I've let her in on how I feel about her, but I'm completely puzzled as to how she feels toward me. We talk alot and screw around when I'm home, flirt a little bit but nothing really serious. I'd happily spend the rest of my life just talking with her, even though there would always be that part of me longing for something more.

Now here's where things get complicated. I was accepted into a liberal arts school I applied to in California (I hate New Hampshire passionately, this place is not for me), and was also accepted into a magnet school back home in Las Vegas (in between a public high school and a private school). Seeing as how totally in love I am with this girl, I decided I was going to go to the school in Las Vegas, despite my parents wanting me to attend the art school in California. They agreed to let me stay, but then something popped up.

My best friend (I've known him for 13 years) was just accepted into that same school in California, and he plans on going. I haven't told him any of what I just said here, yet, but I plan on giving him the lowdown on what's going on in my life when I get out of school at the end of May. Now I have to choose between giving up the life I long to go back to in Las Vegas, and be with the girl of my dreams (as friends or more), or stick with my best friend. I know my friend will want me to go with him to school, and I know my parents are just going to use the fact that he is going there as a reason to send me with him. I know if I fight them hard enough, they'll let me stay home, but do I really want to make it seem like I'm that determined not to be there for my best friend?

Please...help. I'm confused.

Its a choice between a good friend and someone you'd 'spend the rest of your life talking to', given the chance.

How old are you?

[QUOTE=Tiger]Its a choice between a good friend and someone you'd 'spend the rest of your life talking to', given the chance.

How old are you?[/QUOTE]

15, 16 at the end of the summer.

[QUOTE=FuryInArt]15, 16 at the end of the summer.[/QUOTE]


Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh.

In that case, for god sakes, go with your friend to school. You're 15, you'd spend the rest of your life talking to [I]any[/I] girl at this point. Dont go ****ing up something thats actually important.

[QUOTE=Tiger]Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh.

In that case, for god sakes, go with your friend to school. You're 15, you'd spend the rest of your life talking to [I]any[/I] girl at this point. Dont go ****ing up something thats actually important.[/QUOTE]

That was minorly insulting.

I'm young, but I'm not naive. I know the difference between like and love; I've felt both. I'm by no means controlled by my di[size=2]ck[/size], but thanks for taking that into consideration. I see where you're coming from, I really do, but you have to trust me when I say both relationships are important.

[QUOTE=FuryInArt]That was minorly insulting.

I'm young, but I'm not naive. I know the difference between like and love; I've felt both. I'm by no means controlled by my di[size=2]ck[/size], but thanks for taking that into consideration. I see where you're coming from, I really do, but you have to trust me when I say both relationships are important.[/QUOTE]

Mmhmm.

But you have to understand that everyone thinks that at that age. Its simply not true. I know its hard to believe or grasp, but what you're feeling at 15 is something you do not want to base a life altering decision on.

I never said your dick mattered here, for all I know she's a fat cow. Your friend though, thats someone you want to spend a school career with. You'll imediately meet someone else and since its Shakespeares birthday, Ill say they will make you think your swan a crow.

[QUOTE=Tiger]Mmhmm.

But you have to understand that everyone thinks that at that age. Its simply not true. I know its hard to believe or grasp, but what you're feeling at 15 is something you do not want to base a life altering decision on.

I never said your dick mattered here, for all I know she's a fat cow. Your friend though, thats someone you want to spend a school career with. You'll imediately meet someone else and since its Shakespeares birthday, Ill say they will make you think your swan a crow.[/QUOTE]

Hmmm, got a little poet in you. :)

Oh I can name plenty of people out there that are more attractive than she is (not to say she isn't; she's very pretty), but it's her personality I value. Even if she doesn't share the same feelings as myself I'd still want to be her friend, which is something that is not easy to do when you live in another state.

Also, on another note that isn't so much making want to stay home as it is making me not want to go away to school again - boarding school is awful. Even if both people in this situation didn't exist I doubt I'd want to go away again, simply because of my experience here.

EDIT: Gotta go, thanks a million for you help, though, Tiger. :)

[QUOTE=FuryInArt]Hmmm, got a little poet in you. :)

Oh I can name plenty of people out there that are more attractive than she is (not to say she isn't; she's very pretty), but it's her personality I value. Even if she doesn't share the same feelings as myself I'd still want to be her friend, which is something that is not easy to do when you live in another state.

Also, on another note that isn't so much making want to stay home as it is making me not want to go away to school again - boarding school is awful. Even if both people in this situation didn't exist I doubt I'd want to go away again, simply because of my experience here.[/QUOTE]


Its not easy to carry on a friendship with your male friend either...

The school issue should be unrelated and dealt with seperately. Youre still young enough to where your parents may impact your decisions school wise. Sit down and talk to them about the boarding school problem as a seperate issue, get that resolved first. Its way better to base your decision off of whether or not you'll be living in a happy productive enviroment than to base it off of how close or far you will be from your friend or girl.

It seems like I should get this out because I don't want to tell the few friends here that know the saga. I just had sex with my ex. I'm a jerk for it. She wanted to. Oh well.

[QUOTE=The Profit of Maine]It seems like I should get this out because I don't want to tell the few friends here that know the saga. I just had sex with my ex. I'm a jerk for it. She wanted to. Oh well.[/QUOTE]

This could either be nothing or a monumental disaster. Hope its #1...good luck.

[QUOTE=The Profit of Maine]It seems like I should get this out because I don't want to tell the few friends here that know the saga. I just had sex with my ex. I'm a jerk for it. She wanted to. Oh well.[/QUOTE]

Uh, awesome?

Good luck, man. Hopefully it's nothing terrible :-\