:h5:

Faiiiir enough. Just needed to hear it from someone else I suppose. As I said, I am pretty laid back about the whole thing, and when I said I was confused the first time it's cus to be fair I have stronger feelings for other people right now. Plus this guy has a few traits I found irritating in an ex who I really dislike, I hate it when that happens.

[QUOTE=the-UK-ska-scene] Plus this guy has a few traits I found irritating in an ex who I really dislike, I hate it when that happens.[/QUOTE]


Like kissing naive girls and leading them on for weeks?

[QUOTE=Tiger]Like kissing naive girls and leading them on for weeks?[/QUOTE]

Hah, no, like being all weird and more emotional than me and whining a bit.

To be fair he didn't exactly lead me on for weeks, as I was getting on with my life/other people in between times we just picked up where we left off when we met up again.

[QUOTE=BrownSugar]So I had "the talk" with my gf about why we're not progressing. She said she doesnt want to have sex for a while. Shes still a virgin and wants to stay that way for a little bit longer. And said she cant explain why that is. Whether she doesnt want to tell me or she actually doesnt know why. Either way thats cool. At this point she had to get off the phone so I never got my questions answered about why we're not doing everything else.

So I figure I'l take Danish's advice and just push the limits and if I'm stopped I'll bring it up then and ask. :thumb: But I said I think things should go further so hopefully she gets the idea and things improve.

I'm not looking just to get my end wet but I actually believe it helps people connect and grow alot better as they are opening themselves up more to the other. Anyway peace..[/QUOTE]

Dude, you shouldn't have had the talk on the phone.

You should make it clear to her that you're ok with not having sex, but you should at [i]least[/i] be at third base!

Yeah I know I didnt get the chance to take her out that night, she had a family thing she needed to be at. But I will definately finish the talk off in person, I just needed to get that outta me right there and then lol. Its been eatin at me for weeks and weeks. Shed been to third base with her ex in the very first night, I'm gonna have to pull out the old "did you like him more than me?". I really cant see a reason we're not after five months. but anyway..

[QUOTE=BrownSugar]I'm gonna have to pull out the old "did you like him more than me?". I really cant see a reason we're not after five months. but anyway..[/QUOTE]

Jesus, don't do that.

Did you ever stop to think that the reason she hasn't gone that far with you is [b]because[/b] she cares about you more than her ex? You really need to stop being a dumbass about the whole physicality thing. I'm not saying I wouldn't be itching for it either, but you should be flattered that she cares more about your relationship than your dick.

Alright then I'm flattered. But look, your a guy, any guy would be itching for it after five months with not so much as a hand job. All I'm doing is asking her, theres no harm in that. Its not like I've ever even asked for anything this whole time, I let her take her time. Now I'm just seeing where we stand. Sweet.

[QUOTE=BrownSugar]Alright then I'm flattered. But look, your a guy, any guy would be itching for it after five months with not so much as a hand job. All I'm doing is asking her, theres no harm in that. Its not like I've ever even asked for anything this whole time, I let her take her time. Now I'm just seeing where we stand. Sweet.[/QUOTE]

Don't take this too hard but it sounds like you might not be with the right girl.

this has happened to me a couple of times:

girls i know sometimes turn to me out of the blue and say stuff like «Hey, do you know my friend Whoever? (whom i did meet, and who is standing next to her)» or «Hey, have you said hi to Sara today?» (and i have, and Sara's right there next to her).

what gives? are they trying to grab attention or what?

[QUOTE=BrownSugar]Alright then I'm flattered. But look, your a guy, any guy would be itching for it after five months with not so much as a hand job. All I'm doing is asking her, theres no harm in that. Its not like I've ever even asked for anything this whole time, I let her take her time. Now I'm just seeing where we stand. Sweet.[/QUOTE]

Theres more to a relationship than the sexual side of things. Once you realize that you'll be better off.

[QUOTE=EinzingerIsGod]Theres more to a relationship than the sexual side of things. Once you realize that you'll be better off.[/QUOTE]

That's 100% true but when your in a sexual relationship you feel much closer to your partner, you have a better bond. Well at least in my case.

[QUOTE=~Sophie~]That's 100% true but when your in a sexual relationship you feel much closer to your partner, you have a better bond. Well at least in my case.[/QUOTE]

Right. I'm not saying that he should be abstaining or anything along those lines. I agree with you completely that it can build a better bond. But when you're in a relationship strictly for sexual reasons things generally fail.

[QUOTE=EinzingerIsGod]Right. I'm not saying that he should be abstaining or anything along those lines. I agree with you completely that it can build a better bond. But when you're in a relationship strictly for sexual reasons things generally fail.[/QUOTE]


Its been made redundantly clear that the guy is not in it for just sex. Five months have gone by with nothing intimate and he's been patient the entire time.

Climb down off your high horse so you can read the thread a little better.

[QUOTE=BrownSugar]Alright then I'm flattered. But look, your a guy, any guy would be itching for it after five months with not so much as a hand job. All I'm doing is asking her, theres no harm in that. Its not like I've ever even asked for anything this whole time, I let her take her time. Now I'm just seeing where we stand. Sweet.[/QUOTE]
You're being an idiot, dude.

Of course we as guys would probably be "itching for it" after five months, but whether it's something big like sex or something as little as a handjob, whatever kind of stuff like that that she's going to do, you let her do it when she wants to.

What Iscariot is saying is right. Maybe, just MAYBE, it's because she actually gives a damn about you, and maybe whenever you two DO have sex, she wants it to be special. Having talks about it doesn't do anything but make her feel pressured, whether those are your intentions or not.

My advice, either stop being a dick and let her come to her own decisions, or find a girl who will put out for you whenever you snap your fuc[size=2]king[/size] fingers.

I'm sure it says a few pages back but how old are you? (BrownSugar)

[QUOTE=Tillius]You're being an idiot, dude.

Of course we as guys would probably be "itching for it" after five months, but whether it's something big like sex or something as little as a handjob, whatever kind of stuff like that that she's going to do, you let her do it when she wants to.

What Iscariot is saying is right. Maybe, just MAYBE, it's because she actually gives a damn about you, and maybe whenever you two DO have sex, she wants it to be special. Having talks about it doesn't do anything but make her feel pressured, whether those are your intentions or not.

My advice, either stop being a dick and let her come to her own decisions, or find a girl who will put out for you whenever you snap your fuc[size=2]king[/size] fingers.[/QUOTE]

Exactly.

my mum wants to meet my gf, who i dont really think is her type, as in she wont approve of it.

what should i do?

[QUOTE=Corkofski]my mum wants to meet my gf, who i dont really think is her type, as in she wont approve of it.

what should i do?[/QUOTE]
Think of worse scenarios and it'll help you feel better. Imagine your mother is a homophobe and you're bringing home your first boyfriend.

[QUOTE=Corkofski]my mum wants to meet my gf, who i dont really think is her type, as in she wont approve of it.

what should i do?[/QUOTE]

Why do you think she wont approve of her?
How long have you been together?
How old are you?

you should suck it up and just do it. behave well, be polite etc.

and second on the why would she not like the girl?

tatoos piercings etc?

[QUOTE=Iscariot]Exactly.[/QUOTE]

Exactly.

I'd like a sexual relationship, but I don't think it brings you closer if you're not already as close as can be.

And yes, I've been in the situation. It didn't bring us closer. It was just a fun thing to do when hormones kicked up, which isn't negative at all.

It just isn't the pot of gold relationship boost button that this particular person makes it out to be.

There is a true difference between having sex and making love.

[QUOTE=Tillius]There is a true difference between having sex and making love.[/QUOTE]

Doesn't matter. Hormones have to kick up to do either.

If you were aiming that at me.

I wasn't aiming that at anybody in particular.
And I disagree.

When two people just have sex, it's because their hormones are going crazy and this is something they want to do.

When two people make love, it is because they feel so deeply for eachother, which is why it's called making love. They love eachother so much, and they are wanting to take the relationship to the next level.

[QUOTE=Tillius]I wasn't aiming that at anybody in particular.
And I disagree.

When two people just have sex, it's because their hormones are going crazy and this is something they want to do.

When two people make love, it is because they feel so deeply for eachother, which is why it's called making love. They love eachother so much, and they are wanting to take the relationship to the next level.[/QUOTE]

123

[QUOTE=Tillius]I wasn't aiming that at anybody in particular.
And I disagree.

When two people just have sex, it's because their hormones are going crazy and this is something they want to do.

When two people make love, it is because they feel so deeply for eachother, which is why it's called making love. They love eachother so much, and they are wanting to take the relationship to the next level.[/QUOTE]

ATTN: please tell me how much KY it takes to [I]make love[/I] to a girl whose hormones haven't kicked up.

And how many viagra for a guy.

I made love to my ex girlfriend quite a few times, but it didn't take it to a new level. That was the level that we were on (the I'd really like to live with you for longer than the week or so that we have lived together; one day I'd really like to marry you because you'd make a wonderful wife not to mention great friend; and god you'd make a beautiful mother level). And to be honest, we straight ****ed a few times, and I agree, there's a difference. However, it doesn't always take things higher.

eugh I hate talking about this

I have a small problem. My dad is not 100% on my boyfriend.
We (me and my b/f) are both 17 in July and have been together since we were 14. We are in love and have an amazing relationship.

The problem is my dad thinks my boyfriend is too quiet. He is a quiet person with people he's not good friends with but my dad is a very loud person and dosnt understand this. Deep down my dad really does likes him cause he is soo good to me and such a good influence (dont drink, dont do drugs, really sensible etc.) but my dad would just like to get to know him better.

When I talk to my boyfriend about this he just says 'but what would we talk about' (they have little in common). I would just like him to be a bit more confident infrount of him.

My boyfriend is coming to florida for two weeks with my family in the summer and my dad thinks its guna be awful. Any suggestions as to how I can get them closer?

[QUOTE=~Sophie~]I have a small problem. My dad is not 100% on my boyfriend.
We (me and my b/f) are both 17 in July and have been together since we were 14. We are in love and have an amazing relationship.

The problem is my dad thinks my boyfriend is too quiet. He is a quiet person with people he's not good friends with but my dad is a very loud person and dosnt understand this. Deep down my dad really does likes him cause he is soo good to me and such a good influence (dont drink, dont do drugs, really sensible etc.) but my dad would just like to get to know him better.

When I talk to my boyfriend about this he just says 'but what would we talk about' (they have little in common). I would just like him to be a bit more confident infrount of him.

My boyfriend is coming to florida for two weeks with my family in the summer and my dad thinks its guna be awful. Any suggestions as to how I can get them closer?[/QUOTE]

Play like monopoly or something, then they can get to talking like at first it would be like "Hey kid you owe me 50 bucks on park place" but then after about an hour "Did you see the game last night?"

[QUOTE=DrunksWithGuns]Play like monopoly or something, then they can get to talking like at first it would be like "Hey kid you owe me 50 bucks on park place" but then after about an hour "Did you see the game last night?"[/QUOTE]

Good idea, but the 'did you see the game' thing- thats the problem. Dads into sports and beer, boyfriends not!

[QUOTE=~Sophie~]Good idea, but the 'did you see the game' thing- thats the problem. Dads into sports and beer, boyfriends not![/QUOTE]
Political issues? School? Urrmm... I dunno. I'd suggest drunken karaoke but he doesn't drink :-/

this is a long confusing one:
So i met this girl a couple of months ago and like trough the first month everything was cool and it looked like we really had some chemestry and she was obv. feeling something for me and i was feeling something for her, we went out on dates, everynight she would text me telling me how much she likes me and stuff like that but there was a problem, she had a bf but they never talked and she never saw him and she told me that she wanted to brake up with him, so i was like ok, cool it doesnt matter that she has a bf.
Then i found out that theres this other guy who likes her a lot and like he goes to her house, picks her up from school, talks on the phone with her a lot, etc. I asked her 2 times what was going on with that guy and both times she told me he was only her friend and her friends also told me this, but from some of her actions i kinda think shes also interested in him, anyway.
A couple of weeks ago i satrted to notice something diferent with her attitude and i asked her what was wrong and she told me she broke up with her bf, who i thought she didnt feel anything for anymore, but she told me that she was sad and that she missed him, but i dont get it because she never saw/talked with him, after that we kept talking/seeing each other but it just wasnt the same so i asked her if she felt anything like when we first started talking and she told me that she wasnt sure that she needed sometime and stuff like that. Maybe shes telling the truth or maybe shes just letting me know in a not so in your face way that shes not interested anymore and that she likes that other guy :/
So, what do you think?

[QUOTE=Herbert_da_fish]Political issues? School? Urrmm... I dunno. I'd suggest drunken karaoke but he doesn't drink :-/[/QUOTE]
Hell no. The worst thing to talk about with people you don't really know that well is politics.

[quote=Sophie]I have a small problem. My dad is not 100% on my boyfriend.
We (me and my b/f) are both 17 in July and have been together since we were 14. We are in love and have an amazing relationship.

The problem is my dad thinks my boyfriend is too quiet. He is a quiet person with people he's not good friends with but my dad is a very loud person and dosnt understand this. Deep down my dad really does likes him cause he is soo good to me and such a good influence (dont drink, dont do drugs, really sensible etc.) but my dad would just like to get to know him better.

When I talk to my boyfriend about this he just says 'but what would we talk about' (they have little in common). I would just like him to be a bit more confident infrount of him.

My boyfriend is coming to florida for two weeks with my family in the summer and my dad thinks its guna be awful. Any suggestions as to how I can get them closer?[/quote]

I hate when kids say, "omg we're in love". I won't rant about that though.

Just leave your boyfriend and your dad in the same room together and let them figure it out. Your boyfriend needs to man up and make some concious effort to have a better relationship with your father. It's pretty much all on him, so he needs to get his game face on. He sounds socially lazy, and you need to get on top of that too and stress to him that it's important for him to get on with your father.

[quote=guitar p]this is a long confusing one:
So i met this girl a couple of months ago and like trough the first month everything was cool and it looked like we really had some chemestry and she was obv. feeling something for me and i was feeling something for her, we went out on dates, everynight she would text me telling me how much she likes me and stuff like that but there was a problem, she had a bf but they never talked and she never saw him and she told me that she wanted to brake up with him, so i was like ok, cool it doesnt matter that she has a bf.
Then i found out that theres this other guy who likes her a lot and like he goes to her house, picks her up from school, talks on the phone with her a lot, etc. I asked her 2 times what was going on with that guy and both times she told me he was only her friend and her friends also told me this, but from some of her actions i kinda think shes also interested in him, anyway.
A couple of weeks ago i satrted to notice something diferent with her attitude and i asked her what was wrong and she told me she broke up with her bf, who i thought she didnt feel anything for anymore, but she told me that she was sad and that she missed him, but i dont get it because she never saw/talked with him, after that we kept talking/seeing each other but it just wasnt the same so i asked her if she felt anything like when we first started talking and she told me that she wasnt sure that she needed sometime and stuff like that. Maybe shes telling the truth or maybe shes just letting me know in a not so in your face way that shes not interested anymore and that she likes that other guy :/
So, what do you think?[/quote]

Lust. Lust lust lust and a thousand times, lust. That's all this girl seems to run on from the way you've described her. She doesn't sound at all like the type of girl that commits. I have no problem being blunt about this because my ex is the exact same type of girl. The whole time her and I were together, I never knew if I was the only guy she was sleeping with. Girls like that are most often unknowingly overly flirtatious, and confronting them about it does nothing to improve the situation.

The golden rule is that you should never approach a relationship thinking that you can improve various aspects of the person you're interested in. If you can't handle them the way they are, then stay the hell away from them. Don't take the first thing that pops into your arms, because I can guarantee something better is waiting right around the corner.

Also, don't get involved with a girl that you know is with someone else. All you're doing is making yourself look needy and opening yourself up to be used.

[QUOTE=Iscariot]I hate when kids say, "omg we're in love". I won't rant about that though.

Just leave your boyfriend and your dad in the same room together and let them figure it out. Your boyfriend needs to man up and make some concious effort to have a better relationship with your father. It's pretty much all on him, so he needs to get his game face on. He sounds socially lazy, and you need to get on top of that too and stress to him that it's important for him to get on with your father.



Lust. Lust lust lust and a thousand times, lust. That's all this girl seems to run on from the way you've described her. She doesn't sound at all like the type of girl that commits. I have no problem being blunt about this because my ex is the exact same type of girl. The whole time her and I were together, I never knew if I was the only guy she was sleeping with. Girls like that are most often unknowingly overly flirtatious, and confronting them about it does nothing to improve the situation.

The golden rule is that you should never approach a relationship thinking that you can improve various aspects of the person you're interested in. If you can't handle them the way they are, then stay the hell away from them. Don't take the first thing that pops into your arms, because I can guarantee something better is waiting right around the corner.

Also, don't get involved with a girl that you know is with someone else. All you're doing is making yourself look needy and opening yourself up to be used.[/QUOTE]

Yeah, but then he could have a bitter relationship, and write cool songs about it.

*And yeah, I'm one of the only few guys I know that don't say "I love you" at my school. A ton of the girls do, and it's really annoying.

[QUOTE=Iscariot]
Lust. Lust lust lust and a thousand times, lust. That's all this girl seems to run on from the way you've described her. She doesn't sound at all like the type of girl that commits. I have no problem being blunt about this because my ex is the exact same type of girl. The whole time her and I were together, I never knew if I was the only guy she was sleeping with. Girls like that are most often unknowingly overly flirtatious, and confronting them about it does nothing to improve the situation.

The golden rule is that you should never approach a relationship thinking that you can improve various aspects of the person you're interested in. If you can't handle them the way they are, then stay the hell away from them. Don't take the first thing that pops into your arms, because I can guarantee something better is waiting right around the corner.

Also, don't get involved with a girl that you know is with someone else. All you're doing is making yourself look needy and opening yourself up to be used.[/QUOTE]
Wow
i think you are 100% right
best advice i've gotten about this situation
thanks :)

[QUOTE=Hedgedive]*And yeah, I'm one of the only few guys I know that don't say "I love you" at my school. A ton of the girls do, and it's really annoying.[/QUOTE]

while everybody's on the subject - that's one thing my boyfriend and i haven't done. i've known my boyfriend well before we started dating and know that he doesn't throw around the words at all. we've been going out for ~8 months now and everything's been going somewhat perfect. no fights, no arguements, really only good things, so i'm wondering if he's being cautious or just isn't feeling it.

I also have no idea whether he said it to his girlfriend of 1.5 years. i know he cried when they broke up and took it decently hard, but they're still friends. (in fact, on her facebook the only picture she put up from prom was the single picture of her and him -_-)

[underlying, i guess i'm just afraid i'm that in-between-relationship from his ex-girlfriend and college (we haven't talked about whether we're staying together... but we're going to colleges within 10 miles of each other in Philadelphia this fall)]

Wow hes right.

[QUOTE=Iscariot]I hate when kids say, "omg we're in love". I won't rant about that though.

Just leave your boyfriend and your dad in the same room together and let them figure it out. Your boyfriend needs to man up and make some concious effort to have a better relationship with your father. It's pretty much all on him, so he needs to get his game face on. He sounds socially lazy, and you need to get on top of that too and stress to him that it's important for him to get on with your father.

[/QUOTE]

Or get him around when your dad is doing some heavy lifting.

Your dad will ask him to help, and he'll have to prove himself.

It's worked for me on a few occassions now. I mean my ex's pop caught me in the shower with her and didn't kill me so I assume I'm free to give some advice on buddying up with the dads.

[quote=Luster]while everybody's on the subject - that's one thing my boyfriend and i haven't done. i've known my boyfriend well before we started dating and know that he doesn't throw around the words at all. we've been going out for ~8 months now and everything's been going somewhat perfect. no fights, no arguements, really only good things, so i'm wondering if he's being cautious or just isn't feeling it.

I also have no idea whether he said it to his girlfriend of 1.5 years. i know he cried when they broke up and took it decently hard, but they're still friends. (in fact, on her facebook the only picture she put up from prom was the single picture of her and him -_-)

[underlying, i guess i'm just afraid i'm that in-between-relationship from his ex-girlfriend and college (we haven't talked about whether we're staying together... but we're going to colleges within 10 miles of each other in Philadelphia this fall)][/quote]
Hmm...this is tough. Do you think you love him? I assume you probably think you do. So I would say the answer is, as with most relationship problems, talk to him about how you feel. Maybe tell him that you re starting to have deeper feelings for him, possibly love. Then ask him how he feels about you. It will probably be difficult but the most important part of any relationship and keeping it together is to communicate.