yeah thats def my top pick but it's the hardest to get out of all of those

[QUOTE=AA-12;17547012]my situation goes:

around july last year i decided to cut myself up and nearly bleed to death

this february my grandma died, and she's the closest anyone has been to me

a few months back my dad admitted he has ptsd and started on therapy and medicine for it. my gf made me realize my problems are pretty much ptsd related because of my dads influence. i act just like him and it causes tons of ****

now i just live fairly chaotic and do too many drugs

woo venting stuff at 5 am[/QUOTE]

not really anything for me to say bc i havent been through any of that (except the living chaotically and doing too many drugs). i can say that though not everything happens for a reason, you can learn something from everything.

bad things happen = write grim lyrics about them

otherwise you went through them for nothin

im such an escapist that its hard to learn from anything. i just kind of ignore whats true and keep going.

some things i bottle up and ignore other things i just completely immerse myself in

depends whether it's something embarrassing or something that feels glamorous and dignified if i had to guess

idk how one wouldn't want to learn from their mistakes unless they have truly have give up on life

it seems to me a key element of survival

the worst thing is when you make a mistake that's too big to shrug off

then you have to say " in a couple of years this will be v funny in a surrealistic sort of way"

i think thats probably the first step in getting 'uphill' though, learning how to learn from failures/bad things. before i started getting my life together, id look at every arrest, every **** up, every embarassment, as just like, idk, a miscalculation. "oh i was just in the wrong place at the wrong time", something like that, then just forget about it and keep going. you have to learn to take every bad experience and make progression from it, whether you had a hand in creating the experience or not.

and btw when i say finding your own 'right path' and **** i dont just mean getting clean and whatnot. obviously i didnt get rid of my drinking, but i got rid of my lifestyle where that was all i did and didnt give a **** about anything. i mean, for someone to total a car while theyre blacked out, they must not really value their life (me back then).

eh im having trouble forming thoughts into words i need to go to sleep

hey how long does it take food to digest like suppose i just ate

4-10 hours to leave your stomach

24 hours to completely digest

depends on how good your digestive system is. considering you said you take like one **** a week id say youll be carrying what you just ate all day today.

considering i take like 4 shits a day now i think my time is much less than 24 hours. anyway yeah going to sleep now lata.

[QUOTE=Jaundice;17547034]hey how long does it take food to digest like suppose i just ate[/QUOTE]

an hour or so?

at least you aren't supposed to go swimming for that period of time or some shi'

[QUOTE=Nepenthe;17547031]i think thats probably the first step in getting 'uphill' though, learning how to learn from failures/bad things. before i started getting my life together, id look at every arrest, every **** up, every embarassment, as just like, idk, a miscalculation. "oh i was just in the wrong place at the wrong time", something like that, then just forget about it and keep going. you have to learn to take every bad experience and make progression from it, whether you had a hand in creating the experience or not.

and btw when i say finding your own 'right path' and **** i dont just mean getting clean and whatnot. obviously i didnt get rid of my drinking, but i got rid of my lifestyle where that was all i did and didnt give a **** about anything. i mean, for someone to total a car while theyre blacked out, they must not really value their life (me back then).

eh im having trouble forming thoughts into words i need to go to sleep[/QUOTE]

Thats it really. I'm not one to judge other people and what they do, whatever works for the individual etc. but when you clearly bang your head into a wall over and over surely you would want to stop doing that and try something else, at least for a bit.

I thought that would be some kind of ingrained instinct within a lot of people, but I guess not.

[QUOTE=Meatplow;17547038]

Thats it really. I'm not one to judge other people and what they do, whatever works for the individual etc. but when you clearly bang your head into a wall over and over surely you would want to stop doing that and try something else, at least for a bit.[/QUOTE]

yeah, my favorite thing to say is 'keep going down the same roads and you will get to the same places'. cant remember where i heard it.

im v obsessed with instant gratification

[QUOTE=Jaundice;17547040]im v obsessed with instant gratification[/QUOTE]

this is my impression of America as a whole :p

well, i'm only fed a steady diet of TV shows so what do I know

Us americans are very fond of mild Christianity, instant grat and reality shows, yes

im thinking about going to walmart

y/n

[QUOTE=Jaundice;17547044]Us americans are very fond of mild Christianity, instant grat and reality shows, yes[/QUOTE]

I hate these things

I like instant gratification very much. The other two can **** themselves.

whatcha gonna get at walmart josh

i dunno i just need to get out somewhere

i lived in this small city New Iberia once and the kids said all they did on weekends was hang out at Walmart socially

might as well if theres nothing beter to do

im gonna go pretty soon and at least find something for breakfast.

I might make something to eat and watch a film

im just listening to music all night until i get tired enough to knock out and sleep for most of the day

i'll wake up and it will be friday night so i'll go out

who's aa 12?

josh / ghoul hunter

this is so intense

im loose as a goose dont get me started

waht

it's from a hip hop song