[QUOTE=~grif~]well im not too sure who you are directing it all at then.[/quote]

Nobody at all in particular. Anyone that asked for advice received it, so I didn't have anything to add except my own personal commentary.

[quote]but im just saying, anyone for that case - who talks about **** you dont want to hear about, still just nice to sit and listen. Some people i soppose dont enjoy it.[/quote]

You got that right, brotha.

[quote]like my girlfriend goes on about **** and i honestly really enjoy it, i dont care what she is talking about im just listening and listening and just hearing her speak is great.
then ya get some of the lads that are talking about something so stupid that you are just totally tuned out.[/quote]

Yeah, that's fine and everything. I'm just saying I can't handle people who are positively braindead in terms of a conversation. Talking to me about absolutely nothing is flat-out irritating.

[quote]maybe then again its those certain people you'd prefer to hear then others.[/QUOTE]

Not really. If someone is going on and on about his fantasy baseball team, I don't care about it. If some girl is talking about how she wishes her life was like [i]Ever After[/i], I don't care. I don't discriminate on age/sex/race when it comes to talking about nothing.

But, if you smell bad, then your case isn't helped, either :)

[QUOTE=Jom]Not really. If someone is going on and on about his fantasy baseball team, I don't care about it. If some girl is talking about how she wishes her life was like [i]Ever After[/i], I don't care. I don't discriminate on age/sex/race when it comes to talking about nothing.

But, if you smell bad, then your case isn't helped, either :)[/QUOTE]

Thank you! I've actually been called a dick for voicing the same opinion. Conversation should have a worthwhile topic. There's a time to speak, and a time to shut up regardless of who you are.

So I have a weird liking for a girl I barely know, and have barely talked to online. I may see her tomorrow at a local show. I'm uber nervous about it, because I don't want to be shy or bore her, 'cause I'm even quite around my friends.

I don't know what to say or anything, and I'm not sure what I can do force myself to be more open, because I've been hanging out with a couple of friends all day, and I couldn't even get myself to be more outgoing and open with them.

Bah, *whine, whine, whine*.

Name change again? yeesh.

This was my old name, Wizard was an alternate, and now I got them merged.

:D

[EDIT: Woot, 13k!]

Ohh, I thought you had gotten DR changed to Wizard. My bad.

[EDIT: Woot, 6 to 5k!]

I'm out though, it's not happening tonight.

Oh man I feel like ****...I was supposed to go to the movies with one of my female friends tonight, but to put it simply, I stood her up. I mean I really wanted to go with her shes a nice person and all, but the reason i stood her up is because I think she wanted to be more than friends, and I just dont see her in that way...so I attempted to avoid the whole situation by cancelling our little outing at the last minute. Now I dont know what to do...I feel like the biggest asshole and I know shes gonna be pissed...help? :(

[QUOTE=_ThisSecretNinja_]Oh man I feel like ****...I was supposed to go to the movies with one of my female friends tonight, but to put it simply, I stood her up. I mean I really wanted to go with her shes a nice person and all, but the reason i stood her up is because I think she wanted to be more than friends, and I just dont see her in that way...so I attempted to avoid the whole situation by cancelling our little outing at the last minute. Now I dont know what to do...I feel like the biggest spatula and I know shes gonna be pissed...help? :([/QUOTE]
Although you did it too late and she is gonna be peeved, you did the right thing. This happened to me, but I didn't bail out and ended up in a relationship I really didn't want to be in.

i kinda feel like scum. I kept bugging me best friend (female friend) telling her that i fancied her, just to piss her off. but, i have been done it soo long, that i like that i am starting to fancy her. but even worse, her boyfriend is one of my best friends as well. I have been pissing him off because he's not into much metal. But the thing is, i really don't know if i fancy my friend or not, what should i do?

[QUOTE=marc man side-kick]i kinda feel like scum. I kept bugging me best friend (female friend) telling her that i fancied her, just to piss her off. but, i have been done it soo long, that i like that i am starting to fancy her. but even worse, her boyfriend is one of my best friends as well. I have been pissing him off because he's not into much metal. But the thing is, i really don't know if i fancy my friend or not, what should i do?[/QUOTE]

Well if you don't know for sure, leave well enough alone. Why mess up three people's lives just because you [i]think[/i] you might like somebody? Either you do, or you don't. If you have to think about it, chances are you don't.

[QUOTE=Steerpike]Thank you! I've actually been called a dick for voicing the same opinion. Conversation should have a worthwhile topic. There's a time to speak, and a time to shut up regardless of who you are.[/QUOTE]

Nah, I'm just glad I'm not the only person who thinks this. It's just absurd that people think that sitting there while a play-by-play of a TV show is being told to you over the phone is not a waste of time. If I wanted to watch TV, I'd hang up the phone and turn it on.

And of course, I really don't care what people call me. I know who and what I am, so I don't need a re-assurance or new names added to my already-illustrious list.

True. But it does get annoying that people can't just leave me to my ways. If I don't want to sit on the phone having a conversation with someone I just saw 5 minutes ago, why do other people have to give me a hard time for it?

I like talking on the phone, regardless of who it is, unless it's that annoying girl that asked me out teh other day. It passes time fast. =\

[QUOTE=marc man side-kick]I have been pissing him off because he's not into much metal. [/QUOTE]



:confused:

[QUOTE=wademachine]SITUATION

all mine frunds are crazy drunks,
girl i like gets drunk
girl i like gets sad at some jerk not making out with her
me comforts girl
girl is happy, makes out with jerk, makes out with other person
some drunk frund mentions to her to make out with me
girl says "i don't want to make out with them"
me = not too happy
still like her though...
discuss[/QUOTE]


I believe "in your face" is in order.

In your face.

bahhh.

SO this girl, the one that i've been liking, and that i was talking about before. we were gonna head to town, walk around talk about stuff, you know. So yetereday, she said she would tell me when she found out what time and stuff, and when i told her if it was too inconvieneint or w/e she didnt have to. she said she wanted, to, so i gave her my number, and she has my myspace(i use mypsace like e-mail). anyway, so ihavent heard anything from her, and i just found out whes hanging out with otehr kids. same time, same place we were going to. :upset:.

garberflarger, i should probably just forget about it now, work on getting over her.

advice, discuss.

sorry for crappy post, i just found out like. 2 min. ago, and wanted to vent.

I'm going out with this girl, and I really really like her. Only problem is, I just found out yesterday that she has to go away to Idaho every summer. That's 3 months without seeing her. To me, it seems like we won't even know eachother. 3 months is a long time to be apart when we are almost ALWAYS communicating somehow. Has this happened to anyone else? This is really getting me down. If this has happened to you, please tell me about it.

[QUOTE=KurtCobain2902]I'm going out with this girl, and I really really like her. Only problem is, I just found out yesterday that she has to go away to Idaho every summer. That's 3 months without seeing her. To me, it seems like we won't even know eachother. 3 months is a long time to be apart when we are almost ALWAYS communicating somehow. Has this happened to anyone else? This is really getting me down. If this has happened to you, please tell me about it.[/QUOTE]
Me.
lol

Erm - well - how far is Idaho away from you?
Like her enough to keep it going? Think you could? MSN/Emails/Phonecalls and letters are all there. But being with her would never match. Willing to travel to see her every weekend.
Like if you did that - if you really that interested - you'd see her twice a week for the 3months.

Its up to you really if you want to.

And that dose suck.

[QUOTE=~grif~]Me.
lol

Erm - well - how far is Idaho away from you?
Like her enough to keep it going? Think you could? MSN/Emails/Phonecalls and letters are all there. But being with her would never match. Willing to travel to see her every weekend.
Like if you did that - if you really that interested - you'd see her twice a week for the 3months.

Its up to you really if you want to.

And that dose suck.[/QUOTE]


From him. its 17 and a half hours, just to get into idaho though. driving that twice every week. thats not very reasonable. though, one everyso often. maybe see her three times, spend a week there and whatnot. i dunno

[QUOTE=The Fonz]bahhh.

SO this girl, the one that i've been liking, and that i was talking about before. we were gonna head to town, walk around talk about stuff, you know. So yetereday, she said she would tell me when she found out what time and stuff, and when i told her if it was too inconvieneint or w/e she didnt have to. she said she wanted, to, so i gave her my number, and she has my myspace(i use mypsace like e-mail). anyway, so ihavent heard anything from her, and i just found out whes hanging out with otehr kids. same time, same place we were going to. :upset:.

garberflarger, i should probably just forget about it now, work on getting over her.

advice, discuss.

sorry for crappy post, i just found out like. 2 min. ago, and wanted to vent.[/QUOTE]

So you planned on going out for a walk with a girl you like.
You told her she dosent have to if she dosent want to...
She makes a time for ye to hang out with you and her friends included?
that right?
Or was it, she is hanging out with other friends instead?

[QUOTE=The Fonz]From him. its 17 and a half hours, just to get into idaho though. driving that twice every week. thats not very reasonable. though, one everyso often. maybe see her three times, spend a week there and whatnot. i dunno[/QUOTE]
See it wont be so bad if you have a means of getting there, a means of income to pay for it all.
Staying there for a couple of days at a time, if she wanted it ofcourse, wouldnt be so bad.
Like did that a couple of times the 3months would be over and she will be right back with you.

Like given im sure you will not see her for a week or 2weeks at a time, but thats where a phonecall/ an email or MSN would come in handy aye?

[QUOTE=Tiger]I believe "in your face" is in order.

In your face.[/QUOTE]
This was completely stupid and devoid of any useful advice. Looks like your just going to continue with you previous douchebaggery.

[QUOTE=KurtCobain2902]I'm going out with this girl, and I really really like her. Only problem is, I just found out yesterday that she has to go away to Idaho every summer. That's 3 months without seeing her. To me, it seems like we won't even know eachother. 3 months is a long time to be apart when we are almost ALWAYS communicating somehow. Has this happened to anyone else? This is really getting me down. If this has happened to you, please tell me about it.[/QUOTE]
You can still call her and things, can't you? I was in a long-distance relationship for over a year, and there was only a total of 8 days that we didn't somehow contact each other. If it worked for me, it could work for you.

[QUOTE=~grif~]So you planned on going out for a walk with a girl you like.
You told her she dosent have to if she dosent want to...
She makes a time for ye to hang out with you and her friends included?
that right?
Or was it, she is hanging out with other friends instead?[/QUOTE]


yeah, baisically, she told me she wanted to go. and instead, she makes the same plans, with different people.

The "You told her she dosent have to if she dosent want to..." part, was to make sure she wanted to, and that it would be like, inconvienient for her, and she said she did. then she went and made plans with other people, after saying we would hang out.

[QUOTE=wademachine]SITUATION

all mine frunds are crazy drunks,
girl i like gets drunk
girl i like gets sad at some jerk not making out with her
me comforts girl
girl is happy, makes out with jerk, makes out with other person
some drunk frund mentions to her to make out with me
girl says "i don't want to make out with them"
me = not too happy
still like her though...
discuss[/QUOTE]
seems like you are just the friend that comforts when she is down. doh.

she seems like a right slut lol

Hey, Its Gregg (basslikethis), and I'm just giving Kimmie an update on my life as of now.

I like my job, I may even love it. I am working the floor at FoodsCo. I am not in one place for more than a few minutes, and it is tiring.

I havent even gotten my first pay check yet, and I am overjoyed to be working. Sitting at home on my *** all day, and playing bass.

So yeah, becoming a working man has changed my perspective on life a little bit. I never realized how depressed I was when I wasnt working.

So yeah. I just worked six hours after getting only 2hours of sleep.

Later all.

[QUOTE=The Fonz]The "You told her she dosent have to if she dosent want to..." part, was to make sure she wanted to, and that it would be like, inconvienient for her, and she said she did. then she went and made plans with other people, after saying we would hang out.[/QUOTE]
Eh, you probaly shouldn't have said that she didn't have to go. If she didn't want to, she wouldn't go. Don't worry about it. Just make plans some other time.

[QUOTE=~grif~]seems like you are just the friend that comforts when she is down. doh.

she seems like a right slut lol[/QUOTE]


yeah, i was gonna say. Don't bother with her. but i guess it'd be helpfull to know the situation and stuff.

[QUOTE=Damien Rhodes]Eh, you probaly shouldn't have said that she didn't have to go. If she didn't want to, she wouldn't go. Don't worry about it. Just make plans some other time.[/QUOTE]


yeah, i thought that was a bad idea, i dunno, its just wierd, i wanted to make sure i wasnt like, yeah, i dunno. ehhh, i suck at social stuff. lol

[QUOTE=Damien Rhodes]This was completely stupid and devoid of any useful advice. Looks like your just going to continue with you previous douchebaggery.
[/QUOTE]


You (sic) god damn right I will.

I am now officially confused as [size=7]FUC[size=7]K[/size]!!![/size]

[QUOTE=Tillius]I am now officially confused as [size=7]ROUGH SEX[/size]!!![/QUOTE]



why?

What was with that edit?

Well, anyway, me and Pam(if you've been following the story and know who Pam is) went down to the lake today with a bunch of friends. Well, most of them left pretty early, so it ended up being just me, Pam, my friend Mitchell, and his girlfriend Elisha.

Well, we go down to the lake and start swimming, and it ends up being just me and her in the lake, while Mitchell and Elisha are off doing their own thing. Well, after being in there for awhile...I kiss her(or, actually, and BETTER, SHE kisses ME). Then later, she kisses me again.
But that's it.
Nothing's said afterwards regarding anything.

So, I mean, these thoughts are going through my head.
Is that it?
Are we gonna go back out?
Should I ASK her out again right there?


I don't know what to do.
:(

[QUOTE=Tillius]What was with that edit?

Well, anyway, me and Pam(if you've been following the story and know who Pam is) went down to the lake today with a bunch of friends. Well, most of them left pretty early, so it ended up being just me, Pam, my friend Mitchell, and his girlfriend Elisha.

Well, we go down to the lake and start swimming, and it ends up being just me and her in the lake, while Mitchell and Elisha are off doing their own thing. Well, after being in there for awhile...I kiss her(or, actually, and BETTER, SHE kisses ME). Then later, she kisses me again.
But that's it.
Nothing's said afterwards regarding anything.

So, I mean, these thoughts are going through my head.
Is that it?
Are we gonna go back out?
Should I ASK her out again right there?


I don't know what to do.
:([/QUOTE]



the edit was just.. i dunno.. :confused: lol.


as far as the situation, i really havent followed, but i take it you two went out?

Maybe you should just talk to her.

Sorry, if i knew more and wasnt so lazy, maybe i'd have better advice.

ooooh... know that one.
you could do what i did when that situation came to visit me, and just do nothing about it... and sort of hope everything works out...
it won't tho.

[QUOTE=Tillius]What was with that edit?

Well, anyway, me and Pam(if you've been following the story and know who Pam is) went down to the lake today with a bunch of friends. Well, most of them left pretty early, so it ended up being just me, Pam, my friend Mitchell, and his girlfriend Elisha.

Well, we go down to the lake and start swimming, and it ends up being just me and her in the lake, while Mitchell and Elisha are off doing their own thing. Well, after being in there for awhile...I kiss her(or, actually, and BETTER, SHE kisses ME). Then later, she kisses me again.
But that's it.
Nothing's said afterwards regarding anything.

So, I mean, these thoughts are going through my head.
Is that it?
Are we gonna go back out?
Should I ASK her out again right there?


I don't know what to do.
:([/QUOTE]


I haven't been following this but I'll try my best. If you two still have feelings for each other than it shouldn't be a big deal to get back together. Maybe talk to her and see if she felt anything? Just a thought.

Thanks for all the advice, but since none of you have really followed it, I'll wait for Kimmie.

Giving this a bump.

Here's one for the guys. I just picked up something very interesting. I had heard very good things about an author named Leil Lowndes, so I browsed one of her books at the mall today. One tip she gave for making a better impression with people was to smile more slowly. Allow a slight delay, and don't feel like you're obligated to make a very quick smile just to be polite.

I decided to give it a try with people I talked to today. Sure enough, I noticed a difference. People seemed much more animated when I talked to them after that. Amazing how something so slight can make such a difference. And it really does take a lot of the pressure out of making conversation.

Try that with women and see how it works out.

i really dont like how people read books to get advice to make themselves more appealing to others, like that.

be yourself - if they cant handle that, then maybe they arent the perfect person or friend for you

like having to know to smile slowly at things for the rest of yourlife with those people you began it with.
ugh.

[QUOTE=~grif~]i really dont like how people read books to get advice to make themselves more appealing to others, like that.

be yourself - if they cant handle that, then maybe they arent the perfect person or friend for you

like having to know to smile slowly at things for the rest of yourlife with those people you began it with.
ugh.[/QUOTE]

How am I compromising myself by seeking to improve my general behavior? Am I supposed to remain stagnant in mediocrity because I was born that way?

Let me tell you something. Before I began my quest of self-improvement I was a downright miserable sum'bitch. I had no self-esteem, I was prone to frequent depressive episodes, I was [i]under[/i]weight because of the poor job I did in taking care of myself, I hated people and went to great lengths to avoid them... In short, I was on the road to nowhere. And you know what? I'd been that way my entire life.

By your logic, I should have stayed that way because that was "being myself." That was how I was born, that was how I had lived my entire life.

But I wasn't happy that way. I was miserable, angry, self-loathing, and petulent. And in high school, I decided that enough was enough.

The last 5 years of my life have been a quest to become the person I wanted to be in my dreams. And I've made significant progress along the way. I've broken a lot of old bad habits, I'm coming out of my shell, I'm becoming a more well-rounded individual. For the first time in my life, I'm starting to feel optimistic.

And you know why? Because this is the person I'm supposed to be. And you want to tell me I'm not being myself?

[QUOTE=~grif~]i really dont like how people read books to get advice to make themselves more appealing to others, like that.

be yourself - if they cant handle that, then maybe they arent the perfect person or friend for you

like having to know to smile slowly at things for the rest of yourlife with those people you began it with.
ugh.[/QUOTE]

It's not like something you're obligated to do and have to remember though, just a slight change in your behaviour for the better, just like continuing to look at someone until they look away kinda thing. General help in confidence and making it clear that they are not in any way superior to you. As for the smile thing, i know that when someone smiles at something i say STRAIGHT AWAY...it gives me the impression that its fake, a slightly delayed reaction is sometimes good and seems more authentic as they've considered what i said.

Where the hell is Kimmie?

[QUOTE=Jo Shoe Wah]As for the smile thing, i know that when someone smiles at something i say STRAIGHT AWAY...it gives me the impression that its fake, a slightly delayed reaction is sometimes good and seems more authentic as they've considered what i said.[/QUOTE]

DING DING DING!!! We have a winner!

Ever since Dale Carnegie published "How To Win Friends and Influence People" and said how important it was to smile, the fake uber-quick smile became a societal norm.

What Dale neglected to mention is that smiling slowly, to show you've actually considered what the other person says is what's natural and genuine. That's what humans were originally programmed to do. Trouble is, modern culture says if you don't smile, then you're a jerk. So we feel pressure to smile immediately if not sooner. Which only ends up coming across as fake and an ineffectual attempt to be manipulative.

Hah, I was all worried about meeting that girl for the first time at the show today, but she didn't end up coming. Now I'm actually disappointed that I didn't get to meet her. Oh well, perhaps I'll try to hang out with her at the movies or something next week.