Teenage Wrist
Chrome Neon Jesus


2.5
average

Review

by TooManyFriends USER (26 Reviews)
March 11th, 2018 | 43 replies


Release Date: 2018 | Tracklist

Review Summary: Two years late to being twenty years late

Remember that three year stretch from late 2012 to late 2015 where every band in the broader emo/post-hardcore community decided they wanted to be Hum? Bands like Basement, Superheaven (RIP) and Balance and Composure (also RIP) drenched their fuzzy riff-centric songs in reverb and dropped the average tempo of their music about 20 BPM in an effort to evoke the emotional nostalgic feeling of a sound twenty years in the rearview. Personally speaking, these songs were pretty damn good; evidently, Teenage Wrist thought the same, as they’ve decided to model their sound on exactly that concept.

Chrome Neon Jesus is a crunchy slab of airy rock that strikes the same vein the aforementioned bands did, but now that this sonic trend is headed out the door for a second time, something feels a little less special. Vocalist Kamtin Mohager (of The Chain Gang of 1974 fame) is a solid songwriter that knows how to put together a melody, but his drab baritone delivery never really wavers or elevates across the album’s 42 minutes. Songs follow the same verse-chorus structure throughout, with the exception of “Kibo”, a shorter interlude-y track that is less notable for its musical merits than it is for breaking up the record’s monotonous flow.

Teenage Wrist find most of their success when they’re not trying to be pretty, like when “Dweeb” breaks into its driving chorus or when the fat groove of “Rollerblades” anchors the record’s dirtiest guitar tone. It’s still totally aping a ton of other bands, yeah, but it’s way easier to get lost in than four and a half minutes of cleanly strummed whole note chords (“Spit”).

The problem with Chrome Neon Jesus is that it’s an album that feels derivative of bands that were already derivative to begin with. No, Balance and Composure didn’t invent the fuzz pedal, but they at least sounded like they were into the bands they were stealing from. If you really, really can’t get enough of the ‘90s grunge worship bands of a few years ago, Chrome Neon Jesus not only gets the job done, but aims to please. Don’t get it twisted, though; Teenage Wrist are late to the party, and they’re not fooling anyone.



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user ratings (127)
3.6
great


Comments:Add a Comment 
TooManyFriends
March 11th 2018


3495 Comments

Album Rating: 2.5

is there any particular reason that the question mark i put at the end of the first sentence turns into a quotation mark and editing it doesn't change anything?

SandwichBubble
March 11th 2018


13796 Comments


It's a site issue, not just you. It's been going on for a few months.
https://www.sputnikmusic.com/forums/showpost.php?p=19312557&postcount=7939

TooManyFriends
March 11th 2018


3495 Comments

Album Rating: 2.5

ah, gotcha. well use your imagination i guess

JesperL
Staff Reviewer
March 11th 2018


5444 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

definitely see where you're coming from, though I largely disagree. I think I prefer this to eg b&c (especially light we made), the balance of heavier sounds and dreaminess does it for me.

very well written tho, pos!

SitarHero
March 11th 2018


14699 Comments


Never heard of this band but great review. ::POS::

NordicMindset
March 11th 2018


25137 Comments


I've been digging Stoned, Alone for about 1.5 years now, glad to know they FINALLY put out an album

Tranqyl
March 11th 2018


472 Comments

Album Rating: 3.5 | Sound Off

Solid review overall man, definitely pos. I don't think I will ever get tired of grunge worship bands though.

RobbaqPL
March 12th 2018


187 Comments


"I've been digging Stoned, Alone for about 1.5 years now, glad to know they FINALLY put out an album"

I thought I was alone in this! It's a great little song.

Robbyrne
March 14th 2018


13 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

A few of you are missing the boat on this album, to me it really sounds like My Vitriol's debut. Pos though!

cold
March 20th 2018


6721 Comments


Yehhh dis shit good dawgz

Conmaniac
March 20th 2018


27677 Comments


liked their ep, gotta peep this

TooManyFriends
March 21st 2018


3495 Comments

Album Rating: 2.5

they're an aggressively fine band

LoLifant
April 16th 2018


1571 Comments

Album Rating: 3.0

Needs time but gets great

cold
April 16th 2018


6721 Comments


Stoked to see these dudes with Pianos and The World Is...

SandwichBubble
April 16th 2018


13796 Comments


Whoops, keep forgetting to check this.

Conmaniac
June 25th 2018


27677 Comments


same dude..

GreyShadow
June 25th 2018


7031 Comments


i saw these guys with Pianos/The World Is and they were incredibly average/boring which was kinda surprising based on the bands they were touring with.

gschwen
July 13th 2018


989 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

I like this album a lot. I think it's a strong 4.0. It's a weird and unpopular pick for AOTY but it's in the running for me. It's a straight-forward album and the songs are even kind of samey, but they build into some well-written hooks often enough to keep me engaged for most of it. It reminds me so much of alt-rock bands from the 90s, like Hum and Failure, I can't help but feel that it's hitting me right in the nostalgia of when I was first getting into music as a pre-teen.



My biggest gripe with the album is that it's a dumb fucking title.

GhandhiLion
July 26th 2018


17641 Comments

Album Rating: 2.0

good review

pjquinones747
August 8th 2018


4240 Comments

Album Rating: 3.5

Good review, even better summary. I still found this very enjoyable, maybe because it's been my fix lately. If this is par to sub-par I'd like some recs to better renditions of this sound cuz I'm really digging it. I think there is plenty to like, especially in the first few songs, but this is a heavily front-loaded album with exception to the closer IMO so it leaves some to be desired in the middle and latter portions.



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