| The Ocean Holocene | 3.0 |
| David Maxim Micic ECO | 3.5 |
| Steven Wilson The Future Bites | 2.0 |
| The Ocean Phanerozoic II: Mesozoic | Cenozoic | 4.5 |
| The Strokes First Impressions of Earth | 2.5 |
| Yes Relayer | 3.0 |
| Brandi Carlile Bear Creek | 3.0 |
| PHOX PHOX | 2.5 |
| Elvis Costello Secret, Profane & Sugarcane | 2.0 |
| Coheed and Cambria The Color Before The Sun | 3.0 |
| The Afghan Whigs Do to the Beast | 3.5 |
| Sun Ra Space is the Place | 2.0 |
| The jazz equivalent of Emerson, Lake, and Palmer's Works. |
| Blues Traveler Four | 3.0 |
| Snarky Puppy Sylva | 4.0 |
| Peter Gabriel Scratch My Back | 2.5 |
| Animal Collective Merriweather Post Pavilion | 2.0 |
| The Dave Brubeck Quartet Time Out | 4.0 |
| Fiona Apple Tidal | 3.0 |
| Steely Dan Aja | 3.5 |
| Steely Dan Countdown to Ecstasy | 4.0 |
| Bjork Debut | 2.5 |
| Dream Theater Dream Theater | 2.5 |
| Dream Theater Metropolis Pt. 2: Scenes from a Memory | 4.5 |
| Mutemath Vitals | 2.5 |
Mutemath: 80s synthpop edition. Looking for an upbeat Depreche Mode? Here ya go.
Props for your willingness to continually reinvent the wheel, guys, but this ain't my thing. Wayyyyy too much synth with very little of the spacey guitar of the first two albums to counterbalance it. The drums are grating on me, too. It might grow a bit, but probably not much. Better luck next time.
Track picks: Joy Rides, Monument, Best of Intentions, Bulletproof |
| GoGo Penguin v2.0 | 4.0 |
| Maroon 5 V | 1.5 |
| "Animals" is probably the most vapid song ever written. The one track that saves this album from a 1 is "Sugar," which is pleasant enough but ultimately pales in comparison with anything on their first two albums. |
| David Maxim Micic EGO | 2.5 |
| Rush Clockwork Angels | 4.0 |
| Silversun Pickups Better Nature | 4.0 |
| Barenaked Ladies Silverball | 2.0 |
A BnL album with hardly any hooky earworms. Does that sound ominous to you? It should. I'm not sure if I'm getting old or Ed is getting old. Perhaps both. Regardless, it pains me to say that this is probably the worst album they've cut. Yes, worse than All in Good Time.
All of the happy songs sound more forced than AiGT's. Tyler Stewart's drum tracks have become so simple that he could be replaced by a drum machine, and they're made worse by being pushed to the front in the production. Kevin Hearn's vocal parts continue to be annoying, but where his piano work was tolerable-to-good before, the synth is so over-the-top that it becomes grating. Hovering above the mess is Ed, who tells us that it's OK for us to say what we want. Good to hear that he won't take offense to this negative soundoff.
(Kind of) worth your time: "Say What You Want," "Duct Tape Heart," "Narrow Streets," "Piece of Cake" |
| Beardfish The Void | 3.0 |
| David Maxim Micic Bilo 3.0 | 4.5 |
Amazing beginning and end, good middle. Weakest point is probably "Smile," which is a song with a nice enough backbone, but could have been cut down by a minute or two.
In contrast, "Daydreamers" is probably my SotY and is one of the best musical renditions of carpe diem that I've heard (if not THE best). |
| Barenaked Ladies Grinning Streak | 3.5 |
| The Smashing Pumpkins Oceania | 3.5 |
| Vampire Weekend Contra | 2.0 |
| The Beatles Rubber Soul | 4.5 |
| Foo Fighters Wasting Light | 3.5 |
| David Bowie Hunky Dory | 2.5 |
| Mutemath Armistice | 3.0 |
| Barenaked Ladies Barenaked Ladies Are Me | 3.0 |
A pretty strong first half dragged down by the Ladies' indulgence in antiwar/Bush 43 sentiment for four songs in a row towards the end of the album. Serious tracks have never been BnL's forte, and it's glaringly obvious here. Aside from "Bull in a China Shop", Steven Page sounds intensely bored; in hindsight, this album (and its twin, Are Men) showcases his increasing isolation from the rest of the band.
Track picks: "Adrift", "Bank Job", "Easy", "Bull in a China Shop", "Wind It Up" |
| Radiohead Amnesiac | 2.5 |
Inconsistent.
Worth your time: "Packt Like Sardines in a Crushd Tin Box", "I Might Be Wrong", "Dollars and Cents", "Hunting Bears". |
| Steely Dan Katy Lied | 4.0 |
| Maroon 5 Overexposed | 1.5 |
| Meat Loaf Bat Out of Hell | 3.5 |
| Arcade Fire Neon Bible | 3.0 |
| Gogol Bordello Trans-Continental Hustle | 3.5 |
| Neutral Milk Hotel In the Aeroplane Over the Sea | 3.0 |
| Camel Moonmadness | 3.5 |
| The Alan Parsons Project Eye in the Sky | 4.0 |
| 90125? Feh. THIS is the top dog of 80s prog-pop albums released by the 70s prog bands. Unless you want to call Discipline pop. Do you? |
| I Mother Earth Scenery & Fish | 3.0 |
| Collective Soul Hints, Allegations, and Things Left Unsaid | 3.0 |
| The Beatles Please Please Me | 3.0 |
| The Mars Volta Noctourniquet | 2.0 |
| Cedric's a landmine, alright. This album is, too, primarily in the sense of it being dangerous to your hearing. Interesting drums, "Vedamalady" and "Noctourniquet" are pretty good. Everything else is skippable. |
| Dream Theater Octavarium | 3.5 |
| Flying Colors Flying Colors | 3.5 |
| Incubus (USA-CA) If Not Now, When? | 1.5 |
| Five For Fighting America Town | 3.0 |
| Phoenix (FRA) Wolfgang Amadeus Phoenix | 4.0 |
| A Perfect Circle Mer de Noms | 3.0 |
| Cloudkicker ]]][[[ | 3.5 |
| Cloudkicker Portmanteau | 2.0 |
| Five For Fighting Two Lights | 3.0 |
| Russian Circles Empros | 3.5 |
Bizarre how an album with such awesome interludes and an amazing middle ("Schiphol", "Atackla") could leave me feeling...a bit unsatisfied. Perhaps it's that old adage about people remembering the beginnings and endings of things the best. While neither track is outright bad by any stretch, "309" gets lost in its own loudness and "Praise Be Man" simply doesn't have the grab of "Hexed All" or some of their other quieter tracks.
Regardless, a good effort and admirable attempt to integrate their louder and softer halves. |
| Nirvana Nevermind | 2.5 |
| Huey Lewis and the News Sports | 2.0 |
| John Mayer Continuum | 4.0 |
| Goo Goo Dolls Dizzy Up The Girl | 3.5 |
| Cloudkicker The Map Is Not the Territory | 2.0 |
| Yes Time and a Word | 3.0 |
Like a scrambled up jigsaw puzzle--lots of good parts that just aren't assembled together well. There's loads of latent potential in this album, most of which can't be fully enjoyed because Yes's songcrafting had yet to fully mature at this point. The future seeds of greatness that would spring to life on The Yes Album, however, are firmly in place.
Track picks: "The Prophet", "Astral Traveller". |
| The Jimi Hendrix Experience Electric Ladyland | 4.0 |
| Frost* Experiments in Mass Appeal | 4.0 |
| Kesha Cannibal | 1.0 |
| I thought nothing could be worse than Animal. I was proven wrong. |
| Yes Yes | 3.0 |
| Porcupine Tree Fear of a Blank Planet | 4.5 |
| Bruno Mars Doo-Wops & Hooligans | 2.5 |
| Dream Theater Six Degrees of Inner Turbulence | 3.5 |
| Barenaked Ladies Maybe You Should Drive | 3.0 |
Instrumentally, Maybe You Should Drive ranks as one of the Ladies' strongest efforts; Jim and Andy Creeggan are at the top of their game. Andy left the band shortly after the album was complete; his jazz-inflected keyboards were one of the best features of the earliest BnL albums.
Steven Page characterized this album as "difficult", largely because of producer Ben Mink's influence. Even if most of the songs have BnL's trademark tongue-in-cheek humor, the melodies are ordered and layered, not freewheeling. This leaves much of MYSD with a bit of a disconnected feel.
This is, however, an underrated album, and there are still a few tracks that are quite worth your time. Highlights include "Jane", "A", "Alternative Girlfriend", and "Life, in a Nutshell" |
| Between the Buried and Me The Parallax: Hypersleep Dialogues | 3.5 |
| Mutemath Odd Soul | 4.5 |
| Yes Big Generator | 2.0 |
| The Beatles Abbey Road | 4.5 |
| Cynic Carbon-Based Anatomy | 3.5 |
The ambiance is a double-edged sword; it's very enjoyable in the short tracks under 2:30, but I also think it makes Box and Elves sound muddled.
Give the shorties (especially Hieroglyph) and the eponymous track a spin. |
| Sigur Ros Takk... | 3.5 |
| Barenaked Ladies Hits From Yesterday & the Day Before | 3.0 |
| Counting Crows Films About Ghosts: The Best Of | 3.0 |
| Yes 90125 | 2.5 |
| Billy Joel The Stranger | 4.5 |
| System of a Down System of a Down | 2.5 |
| Barenaked Ladies Maroon | 3.5 |
| Katy Perry Teenage Dream | 2.0 |
| Tortoise Standards | 3.0 |
| Not nearly as jazzy as TNT, and thus, in my opinion, not as enjoyable. Six Pack, Blackjack, and Speakeasy are all great. Most of the rest of the album is listenable if not up to the standards (pun possibly intended) that TNT sets, with the exception of Eros which cannot be called anything other than annoying. |
| Barenaked Ladies All in Good Time | 2.5 |
The Ladies harness their anger toward Steven Page's departure with mixed results. Most of the time it fizzles out and gets thrown into a pile of listenable but ultimately forgettable pop hooks, but a few tracks soar brilliantly and you'll get a brief flash of the Barenaked Ladies that you used to guiltily love circa Stunt or Gordon ("Golden Boy", "Every Subway Car"). "You Run Away" is also the best ballad that Ed will ever write.
The addition of more vocals by Jim Creegan ("On the Lookout", "I Saw It") is a welcome change, counterbalanced by the unwelcome addition of more vocals by Kevin Hearn ("Another Heartbreak", "Jerome", "Watching the Northern Lights"). |
| Steven Wilson Grace for Drowning | 4.0 |
| System of a Down Toxicity | 2.5 |
| System at their most accessible. This isn't saying much. |
| Megadeth Rust in Peace | 4.5 |
| Goo Goo Dolls Gutterflower | 3.5 |
| Maroon 5 Hands All Over | 2.5 |
| Maroon 5 It Won't Be Soon Before Long | 4.0 |
| Guilty pleasures! Guilty pleasures! Come and get yer hot guilty pleasures! |
| Scale the Summit The Collective | 4.5 |
Carving Desert Canyons was an enjoyable effort, but it was often weighted down by songs that were a bit too long for their own good. Monument suffered from a similar problem, only the issue there was that things were a bit too mathy. Scale the Summit went back to the drawing board, struck a balance, did some minor trimming and tweaking, and this beauty is the result.
"Whales", "The Levitated", "Origin of Species", and "Drifting Figures" are modern masterpieces; everything else ranges from good to great. Absolutely no filler. |
| The Fray How to Save a Life | 2.0 |
1) Pinch your nose while singing along with the piano in a whiny voice.
2) ?????
3) PROFIT!! |
| Scale the Summit Carving Desert Canyons | 3.5 |
| Silversun Pickups Carnavas | 4.0 |
| Return to Forever Romantic Warrior | 4.0 |
| Freezepop Future Future Future Perfect | 3.5 |
| Kesha Animal | 1.0 |
| King Crimson In the Court of the Crimson King | 4.0 |
| Barenaked Ladies Stunt | 4.5 |
| Barenaked Ladies Gordon | 4.0 |
| Lady Gaga The Fame | 2.5 |
| Lady Gaga Born This Way | 1.5 |
| Unlike Ke$ha, she has something resembling a brain and could have produced something other than banality. Instead, we get to listen to her musings on how it's cool to be an outcast while she sings along to boring, contrived dance-pop. Whoa! How edgy, original and empowering. |
| Iron Maiden Powerslave | 4.5 |
| Yes The Yes Album | 4.0 |
| Russian Circles Geneva | 4.0 |
| Cloudkicker The Discovery | 4.0 |
| System of a Down Steal This Album! | 1.5 |
Talent: Obvious.
Sense of musical transition or melody: Nonexistent. |
| Weather Report Heavy Weather | 3.0 |
| One unbelievably good track (Birdland) and two others which are pretty good (A Remark You Wrote, Palladium) on an otherwise passable, but 'meh' album. |
| Steely Dan The Royal Scam | 3.5 |
| Steely Dan Gaucho | 2.0 |
Let's say that Gaucho is a middle-aged woman who used to be quite a looker. Instead of coming to grips with her age, she simply tries to bury her wrinkles under an ever-increasing mound of skin exfoliation products and make-up. All these products do, however, is make her look worse.
Some Dan fans love to talk about how 'smooth' or 'groovy' Gaucho is. You wonder why they use these adjectives? These are the ONLY words that can be used to describe this album. Nothing else resides in these tracks--Gaucho has no soul left under the laboriously-applied mascara. |
| Radiohead Kid A | 3.5 |
| If you must listen to one album by the Angsty Falsetto Kings, this is the one. Yorke's voice becomes more tolerable when buried behind a wall of surprisingly cool-sounding electronics, and not even I am immune to "Idioteque". |
| Dream Theater Black Clouds and Silver Linings | 4.0 |
| Dream Theater Systematic Chaos | 2.5 |
| Beardfish Sleeping in Traffic: Part Two | 3.0 |
| Barenaked Ladies Born on a Pirate Ship | 2.5 |
| Tortoise TNT | 4.0 |
| Mutemath Mutemath | 3.5 |
| Radiohead The King of Limbs | 3.0 |
| Barenaked Ladies Everything to Everyone | 3.0 |
Though the Ladies started dialing down the good-natured tongue-in-cheek on Maroon, this album marks the point where the clown mask really starts to fall off. Much of the album is a sardonic commentary on consumer culture and the Bush Administration; Steven and Ed's political observations are neither subtle nor especially poignant, and it's probably no coincidence that the songs that proselytize the most are also the ones I press skip on the most.
There's still a small handful of great songs to like here, but this album is divided very sharply between the winners, losers, and mediocre.
Try 'em, you'll probably like 'em: Celebrity, For You, Testing 1-2-3, Aluminum.
Avoid like the plague: Shopping, War on Drugs.
Alright in a pinch: Maybe Katie, Unfinished, Second Best, Take it Outside, Have You Seen My Love. |
| Steely Dan Pretzel Logic | 5.0 |
| Radiohead OK Computer | 2.0 |
| Excellent evidence that the words "influential", "experimental", and "different" are not always synonyms for "enjoyable". |
| Porcupine Tree Deadwing | 3.5 |
| Cynic Traced in Air | 4.5 |
| Gatsby's American Dream Volcano | 4.0 |
| I Mother Earth Blue Green Orange | 3.5 |
Good news: Edwin's not singing!
Bad news: Lots of filler!
Track picks: "Summertime in the Void", "Good For Sule", "Cloud Pump", "Autumn on Drugs" |
