Twin Forks
Twin Forks


1.5
very poor

Review

by Josh Fountain CONTRIBUTOR (64 Reviews)
February 25th, 2014 | 54 replies


Release Date: 02/25/2014 | Tracklist

Review Summary: Chris Carrabba's new outfit has created a contrived, and quite frankly insulting, attempt to ride the coattails of a dying trend.

So, Chris Carrabba has hitched his wagon to the fading star that is overly happy indie-folk. The trend of vapid, sepia-toned, false Americana has started to wane a bit since 2012, as is common when a scene becomes popular. Ever since the explosion of “Little Lion Man”, every pretty faced person with an acoustic guitar tried to find a bearded guy who can play banjo, and together they sprinted towards the closest coffee shop in order to annoy some poor bastard trying to finally finish that screenplay. The drummer in The Lumineers was once quoted in the Chicago Tribune as saying, “Our songs are about people on a ship, singing arm in arm, all singing the same note.” Other than just being a really stupid metaphor (what possible purpose could a whole bunch of people yelling “Ho! Hey!” serve on a ship, other than to initiate the reinstatement of a plank?), the quote also brings to light the fundamental issue with the indie-folk scene: they are doing nothing more than preying on the intrinsic need for white people to do things in unison. White people love doing things in perfect unison (see: the Macarena, Nazi Germany), no matter where they are or what they’re doing. Chris Carrabba, already a master of making people sing pseudo-philosophical lyrics back at his face in Dashboard Confessional, has seized the opportunity to jump to a new bandwagon and grab those again who grew out of Dashboard when they entered college.

Carrabba and the rest of Twin Forks are smart enough to use the same beats that every other indie-folk band employs; making every song relentlessly clappable by way of inserting claps in almost every song. Lyrically, Carrabba seems to have actually regressed from his days in Dashboard, where he could actually get the listener to feel; back then it seemed as if he was genetically created to emote. In Twin Forks, he has fallen for every lyrical cliché in the mainstream indie-folk book, calling every female “girl” and going doggedly in depth about his “tearing heart”. The never-ending happy tone doesn’t serve well either, coming off as the dreaded combination of unauthentic and contrived. There is a colossal waste of resources and talent on display at all times, which makes the entirety of Twin Forks seem like nothing more than a plea to get mainstream recognition. They all clearly did their homework, taking bits from Mumford and Sons and Of Monsters and Men, throwing in pinches of The Civil Wars and Alabama Shakes for a bit of effect, and finally grinding it all down to a bland paste that is served to the listener.

There is no reason why Twin Forks should exist. The only unique piece, Chris Carrabba, continually phones it in with half-assed lyrics and a vocal performance that doesn’t do much to impress. Every single song present on this debut has been written and recorded countless times before within the past five years, in slightly different variations, and shoved down the throats of every person who thought listening the Mumford and Sons Pandora station was a good idea (although to an extent they completely brought it upon themselves.) Also, throwing in claps every song is unforgivable. There is no damn excuse for that. At a certain point it is insulting your fanbase’s intelligence. “No, this is the part where you herd of idiots starts clapping.” If you are going to write an album that is clearly trying to jump on a trend, try not to make it so blatant and calculated that it comes off as condescending to the listener.



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user ratings (17)
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other reviews of this album
Scott M. Baldwin (1)
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Comments:Add a Comment 
Curse.
Contributing Reviewer
February 25th 2014


8021 Comments

Album Rating: 1.5

There is a stream, but please don't bother.


http://www.usatoday.com/story/life/music/2014/02/20/twin-forks-chris-carrabba-album-premiere/5612473/

TheGreatQ
February 25th 2014


1554 Comments


"White people love doing things in perfect unison (see: the Macarena, Nazi Germany), no matter where they are or what they’re doing."

Would pos hard just for this line, but the rest of the review is really good too. Not going to check this out.

Digging: Somos - Temple of Plenty

Curse.
Contributing Reviewer
February 25th 2014


8021 Comments

Album Rating: 1.5

Those are the first two things that come to mind when I think of white people doing dumb shit in unison


Cygnatti
February 25th 2014


22300 Comments

Album Rating: 1.5

wow this is horrible

Digging: Jerry Lee Lewis - Live at the Star Club, Hamburg

StrangerofSorts
Contributing Reviewer
February 25th 2014


2719 Comments


I imagine Pitchfork would have been a lot nicer to Deer Tick if shit like this was more common 10 years ago.

I've been listening to a lot of Deer Tick.

Curse.
Contributing Reviewer
February 25th 2014


8021 Comments

Album Rating: 1.5

I've never listened to Deer Tick

ASnideReturns
February 25th 2014


5241 Comments


Fuck I hated Little Lion Man, good review.

RunOfTheMill
February 25th 2014


1555 Comments


Great review.

VheissuCrisis
Contributing Reviewer
February 25th 2014


1051 Comments


"White people love doing things in perfect unison (see: the Macarena, Nazi Germany), no matter where they are or what they’re doing."

Definitely the best line in a music review ever.

Digging: The Hotelier - Home, Like NoPlace Is There

ProjectFreak
February 25th 2014


1443 Comments


This is one of the best reviews I've read in a long time.

LizaLowe
February 25th 2014


43 Comments


Great review!

SharkTooth
February 25th 2014


6484 Comments


"Those are the first two things that come to mind when I think of white people doing dumb shit in unison"



Oh come on, no YMCA??

Digging: Boylan - ima rockstar im not a rockstar

ILJ
February 25th 2014


6741 Comments


lol'd hard at the Nazi Germany line

Digging: FKA Twigs - LP1

ASnideReturns
February 25th 2014


5241 Comments


Oh come on, no YMCA??

LOL

SnipeCity
February 25th 2014


160 Comments


Outstanding review

marcosmce
February 25th 2014


122 Comments


Goddamn good review. I hate constant clapping, even more so when it comes along invariable banjo-centered melodies. Was thinking of giving this a try, but now, nomp.

MikeForHollywood
February 25th 2014


7 Comments

Album Rating: 2.5

Their EP wasn't all bad, but this is a pretty mediocre effort at best

sharkmsc
February 25th 2014


69 Comments


Why some indie is becoming derivative and annoying: a thesis. Can I read this review forever? I have been beginning to feel this way, albeit more crudely.

SharkTooth
February 25th 2014


6484 Comments


Crappy indie must be given its appropriate label in order for people to not buy it

HolidayKirk
Contributing Reviewer
February 25th 2014


1675 Comments


This review is fucking awesome.



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