Review Summary: Improvement!
Chapter II: Fast Ascent to Quality
39-Smooth was a real good disaster. I mean, a bad disaster. of course, oxyMoronic statements make me sound moronic.
Emulating hardcore punk like Black Flag, Minor Threat and Fugazi (I spelled it corectly this time, thank you Brostep for pointing that out to me). On "Kerplunk", Green Day take their sloppy punk sound and polish it a bit, while adding more memorable riffs to improve it. So I hope it would wish it well.
(NOTE: I know that me doing some track by terack (commenly known as TBT's on Sputnik) reviews are frowned upon. I think, however, that i could improve. Concision is key - I will talk briefly about it from nowon okay guys? Pls take my advise because I hate being ***ted on for being a good person. *** you people who diss me because of TBT reviews. I don't like haters - I cannot take a ***ing criticism.)
1. 2000 Light Years Away - This begins an album of a high (pot reference) note. It doesn't go down (oral sex joke), and it keeps getting better. I like the riffs. Billie has nice vocals too. Not as orgasmic as some of the other songs, but nice crunching riffs. It's a good song - don't *** on it please. 4/5
2. One for the Razorblacks - I like Ryan Mallet (Hogs reference). Please laugh at that joke. Thank you. Anyways the album then goes to a fast rockin tune with punk ness add ed intoit. I really dop like this song. Come on, how can you not. It riffs off hard... and then again it comes back again. All this so good is for me too. I like it. 4/5
3. Welcome to Paradise - *** this song. Dookie's version is so much better. This sounds too undeground and non- mainstream friendly. Come on man, be honest with me! How the *** could you like something so sloppily wriiten! I want it poloshed, bitch, not this! Emulating Ian MacKaye is not good when you do it so freakking sloppy. 2/5
4. Christie Road - True highlight. I don't understand - gems like this after crappers like old school "Welcome to Paradise" (SoAD REFERENCE). Tell me, if BJ can riff this hard, why did he have to make *** like UNO!? UNO! was ***t. DOS! was better, but come on, their are so mainstream in a badway. Unlike grittiness is a goodway. 5/5
5. Private Ale - When I want to get drunk and get laid, I'll drink a private ale. Mike Dirnt got some good basslines here. Not as goof as "Longview". I liked it decently. 2/5
6. Dominated Love Slave - I promised thaht I would shorten my TbT but I have to rant. Like All By Myself, Tre proves his stupid ass sopho moric mind with bull*** like this. The addition to Tre greatly improved this album. So good. He got better drum fills then John Kuffermeyer, but the one thing that subtrakts his influenza is stuff like this.
Tre is probably the horniest guy in the band. He can alegedly suck his own dick and jerk off well. He seems like the guy who does cumshots and is addicted to porno-graphy. But this is too far. He is a kinky person, I ***ing get it. So screw him - he wants you to spank his ass and feel the pain. But his vocals - he's a ***ing bad singer. *** his voice. It sucks. so does his cock. 1/5
7. One of My Lies - After a long summary for Dominated *** Slave, I am going to be short and EnterTain you wi th a tale about GD that i thonf is tryuw about the album. I bleive te title of Kerplunk came because Billy Joe took a *** in the toilet and was fascinated by the kerplunk sound that occured when the *** hit the toilet water. Just my two pennies. 1.5/5
8. 80 - It's ok. 2.5/5
9. Android - I have an android phone. Fun fact. This song is so average it doesn't desreve a review, so i'll just leave ti off at here. so tired of describing these ***ing songs track by goddamn track. 2.5/5
10. No One Knows - I thought this was a cover of the awesome cahrt topper by Queens of the Stoned Agee - but it's not. It's an alright song - can riff hard. I'm so tired describing how much I enhoy riffs. 3.5/5
11. Who Wrote Holden Caulfield? - Copy what I wrote for Christie Road. 5/5
12. Words I Might Have Ate - The only words BJ might have ate because the song is catchy. Good riffs too. Paste it for me plese. Riffs are nice. Enulation of hardkore punk works out a bit. 4/5
13. Sweet Children - There are four tracksa t the end that were originally the Sweat Children EP relaesd back in the early 1980s. This is its title track. 2.5/5
14. Best Thing in Town - 1989 seems so long ago - I was not alive when this song ame out. But it screams independet. No coroprate bull*** to *** them over, no non-nonsene to *** it up. Good clean teenagers making passionate music for people to jam to. That is why I like this album. So dead in tracks. 4/5
15. Strangeland - Best Thing in Town riffed hard: it was the best Sweet Children song. This is also on Sweet Children too. It was originally the third song on the EP. 2/5
16. My Generation - The Who were an alright band I guess. Not heavy enough for my taste. They add a punk twist to an old 60s song and manage to make it sound like an garage underground song. Pretty good. I like it enough. 3/5
There are 16tracks on this album. Most of the Sweet Children ones could have been cut off because they are mediocre. The album lags in the middle and the end. Overall I like Kerplunk better than 39-Smooth because it was more polished in a good way. It also was good because it showed passion and enegry. The perverted Tre Cool is a nice addition to an alrighty good lineup. So I give Kerplunk a passing grade of 3.8/5. This rounds up to 4/5 because anything above a 5 gets rounded up to the next whole number.
