Review Summary: Attack Attack's younger, less annoying Canadian brother.
According to Urban dictionary Geeving
means to basically not give a f*ck about anything. Abandon All Ships! obviously don’t care about what you think of them, they make music because it’s their passion. But if you really look at it, they’re just a weaker, Canadian version of Attack Attack! with slightly less annoying vocals, and some of the most horrible ‘screams’ ever recorded.
Hailing from Ontario, AAS! rose to prominence after being featured on Canadian TV show DisBand
which showcases local music acts to attempt to reach stardom. Having recorded an EP prior to the show, they decided to perform their most well-known song Megawacko
(which was later re-recorded and entitled Megawacko 2.1
) for the judges of the show. They were approved, and won a record deal to Rise Records and Underground Operations, which led to the recording of Geeving
As the album starts with Bro My God
(clever, huh?), the listener is immediately greeted to some of the weakest, most uninspired screams to ever be recorded. Way to go, Angelo Aita. It’s safe to say that even Emmure’s frontman can scream better than this. It’s horrible. With that aside, you get a half-decent post-hardcore song until it suddenly stops and throws a synth break complete with auto-tuned vocals from bassist Martin Broda. The best thing I can say about these, is that he at least knows how to sing, and the auto-tune isn’t nearly
as ear-shatteringly grating as modern pop radio-trash. Another minute and a half leads to an odd outro, of a robotic voice saying ‘But Daddy, it’s just a wiener,’ (way to keep it classy, boys.) when the album starts to gradually pickup.
Third single from the album Geeving
throws more laughable ‘screams’ at you. Lo and behold, the chorus is actually catchy, and you might find yourself singing along at some point. Here, I mention, you will find the most pointless guest cameo in a song ever
! Rapper Jhevon Paris is featured in the song for a whopping 4 seconds. Was it really worth the money? Considering following tracks, maybe it was.
The re-recording of Megawacko
features more auto-tune than the previous songs, which could be either a positive or negative point for some people. Some nice, if boring at times, drumming is featured in this song from drummer Dan Paiano, as this song is where he shines. The guitars take a backseat to the synth (save for the breakdowns) in this song, as you realize you could be spending your time doing something worthwhile.
Two forgettable songs follow this, as Family Goretrait
begins, which features a cameo from Rody Walker of Protest the Hero. A sort of orchestra-type intro begins as we are greeted with more uninspired synth, and horrible screams. This song really tests your patience for how much you can take until Rody comes in, and it’s worth it, as he totally saves the song. Sure, the lyrics don’t completely make sense, but with a voice like his, it shouldn’t matter. Luckily, he appears in the song for longer than 4 seconds, so that’s a bonus.
Album highlight Guardian Angel
is an auto-tuned guilty pleasure of mine. This is song has a great hook, and features another (and longer) cameo from t.A.T.u.’s Lena Katina. Just by looking at the title, you can tell this is going to be a sappy-ass song meant to make appeal to only the teenage girls of the world, whilst throwing in a few screams to make it sound ‘br00tal’. Another bonus for this song, is that Angelo is very rare on this track, which makes me incredibly happy, because if you’re like me, and you’ve dealt with him thus far, it’s a welcome bonus to take a break.
The band’s guitarists never really get a chance to do anything as they’re always out-shined by synth player Seb Nunez’ inspired hooks. Granted, while the synth here is performed much better than most bands, it’s overused. Final track Take One Last Breath
contains the better portion of synth on the album, and is the only other song worth checking out on the album. To my surprise, the lyrics here are actually decent. Well, at least compared to the other songs. Let’s have an example. This song: ‘I’m on the cruise to paradise, I’m done with sin, I’ve paid my price.’ Whilst on Strange Love
we get the beautifully written ‘All I wanna do is party, feel up your body. Fist pump like Pauly D, we’re growing up Gotti. Last thing I will mention is that Angelo actually tries
on this track, as he experiments with the higher and lower range of his voice, and it’s actually not that bad.
Overall, if you’re looking for a fun album to make fun of, this is an obvious choice. While far away from being what is considered ‘talented’, AAS! definitely know how to have a good time, and enjoy what they do. However, if you can’t stand auto-tune, stay the hell away from this.
Take One Last Breath