These Hearts
Forever Ended Yesterday


1.0
awful

Review

by ColdGobra USER (5 Reviews)
August 14th, 2011 | 36 replies | 8,437 views


Release Date: 2011 | Tracklist

Review Summary: These Hearts are all that's wrong with music today.

Do you remember that last South Park episode, where all the new music sounded like sh!t to older people? Well, listening to These Hearts, I experienced the same phenomenon, so I've objectively tried to analyze why this is happening. Firstly, let us see, what These Hearts bring to the table:

- Soft parts, disrupted by heavy screams? CHECK
- Breakdowns? CHECK
- Senseless and long song titles, that appear to be witty to any uneducated listener, who's not smart enough to realize that it's just dumb (for the sake of being witty)? CHECK
- Annoying, high-pitched, autotune singing? CHECK
- Cookie monster screams? CHECK

Analyzing the above attributes, These Hearts probably had some kind of metalcore tutorial, because they sound exactly the same as every other metalcore band out there. No, I won't make this "all metalcore sounds the same right after As I Lay Dying made some commercial success" type of review, but that's something definitely worth noting.

Secondly let's see what does These Hearts's "Forever Ended Yesterday" bring to the table. Well, nothing really. It sounds like a bad mix of emo-punk bands featuring every metalcore song out there. Their single, "Apology Rejected" is the prime example of what I'm talking about. That song is forgettable and boring. Obviously, the structure is predictable: soft melody, followed by heavy riffs whereas annoying, high pitched singing gets disrupted by cookie monster growls.

I dare you, reader, to listen firstly "Apology Rejected" and right after that "Denial Is Not Just A River In Egypt". If you ever heard anything else than These Hearts, you'll probably question "does this songs sound the same?". Do not panic, you are completely right. Not only is the structure somewhat repeated, it appears the fair-haired singer is singing the same melody throughout the whole album.

"Romans 15" has an excellent intro, that reminds you immediately on Killswith Engage (at least the riff does). Musically it's the same: playing soft melodies, then some palm muted strumming. And while the high pitched excuse for singing is present, it really reaches its peak at "Quitting While You're Behind". He sings as high and as annoying as humanly possible and I'm being objective here.

"Thinking In Terms Of Two" is actually an acoustic song, which is kind of a surprise. It's actually the best thing on the album, and it's pretty average. But the last song, " Dime A Dozen", reminds you immediately why you disliked the whole album: another generic song, with nothing really worth mentioning.
Overall speaking, this album is completely forgettable, from the riffs, to the vocals, not to mention the rhythm section which could be done on some open-source drum generating software, with very limited scope if you get my drift. So what is this band doing on Victory Records you ask?

Well, the answer is simple: "These Hearts" have only one target audience and that is scene kids, which are usually < 18 years old girls and ugly boys, who cover their ugly faces with emo-haircuts and wear trendy clothes; all to divert the observer from their ugly, ugly faces. You know I'm right, reader and if you disagree you're probably a 16 year old boy or 13 year old girl, listening to "These Hearts" right at this exact moment. And you know something about scene kids? They BUY things. As long as they're trendy and as generic as hell.

So, while These Hearts may still be relevant in some 13-year old girl's room, they're completely forgettable in real world and should stop making this recycled-type music ASAP. They bring nothing new to the table, they didn't reinvent anything and what they're copying is by-the-book metalcore at its worst.


user ratings (43)
Chart.
1.4
very poor

Comments:Add a Comment 
InFiction
August 14th 2011


3658 Comments


Not a bad review. Seems a little rushed, though that could just be me.
Band sounds awful.

ColdGobra
August 14th 2011


57 Comments

Album Rating: 1.0

Thanks for your response. Yeah, I just got into the mood and started writing, went over a couple of times, should have perhaps waited a day or so, but I was passionate to make a point.

pmmets07
August 14th 2011


5872 Comments

Album Rating: 1.0

while your rating is definitely correct, this review is a bit sloppy

"they didn't re-invent nothing"

iFghtffyrdmns
August 14th 2011


7047 Comments

Album Rating: 1.0

Review isn't too bad... a little casual and angry but who cares. That album art font just SCREAMS of the pop punk / metalcore bullshit that pollutes a lot of what is a still decent scene. Anyway, have a pos - you deserve it and apparently other people didn't think so haha

iFghtffyrdmns
August 14th 2011


7047 Comments

Album Rating: 1.0

also, it's kind of annoying that you never capitalize the band's name in the review. Perhaps you think they don't even deserve proper capitalization, fine, but it's worth it to go back and fix that anyways - just makes your review more professional looking.

ColdGobra
August 14th 2011


57 Comments

Album Rating: 1.0

iFghtffyrdmns thanks for your input, will do.

geezers1989
August 14th 2011


135 Comments


i believe you may have them confused with the black eyed peas, sir.

geezers1989
August 14th 2011


135 Comments


but yeah, they aren't very good.

WhiteWallStargazers
August 14th 2011


2647 Comments


This is the Minnesota band right? They're quite awful

-Opps North Dakota or something. They play in MN alot, my bad

RosaParks
August 14th 2011


14900 Comments


this sounds so brutal

Apollo
August 14th 2011


10302 Comments


"they didn't re-invent nothing"

good engrish right here

ColdGobra
August 14th 2011


57 Comments

Album Rating: 1.0

Well, obviously English is not my native language, so you can suggest a more appropriate or correct version of the sentence. I changed it already, but I'm not sure if it's any better.

pmmets07
August 14th 2011


5872 Comments

Album Rating: 1.0

"they didn't reinvent anything new"

get rid of the word "new". lol sorry for the unconstructive criticism earlier. didn't realize english was a second language for you.

iFghtffyrdmns
August 14th 2011


7047 Comments

Album Rating: 1.0

number one in the running for lowest ranked album of 2011...

Comatorium.
August 14th 2011


4114 Comments

Album Rating: 1.0

Listened to one song. Utter trash.

Digging: Silverstein - This is How the Wind Shifts: Addendum

getdownonthemic
August 14th 2011


28 Comments


Oooh oooh

let's get a bunch of people and give this 1.5, 2, 2.5, 3, 3.5, 4, 4.5, and 5 ratings to totally screw up the rating charts

iFghtffyrdmns
August 14th 2011


7047 Comments

Album Rating: 1.0

sorry but I'm failing to see how would that "screw up" anything

Crymsonblaze
August 14th 2011


7480 Comments


Listened to the first song. Horrible horrible horrible

Josh D.
August 14th 2011


13968 Comments


Not a bad review.


Are you fucking kidding?

TomAkaVeto
August 14th 2011


1636 Comments


I watched part of their music video and I wanted to commit suicide. Their lead singer not only sounds incredibly annoying, but he also looks incredibly annoying.



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