Johnny Hobo and the Freight Trains
Love Songs For The Apocalypse


4.5
superb

Review

by Statrick Pickles USER (63 Reviews)
January 14th, 2011 | 131 replies | 19,126 views


Release Date: 2005 | Tracklist

Review Summary: Who needs drugs? Johnny Hobo needs drugs.

6 of 6 thought this review was well written

Sitting down to write this review, I find myself wondering whether or not Johnny Hobo (aka "Pat the Bunny", but Johnny Hobo sounds way cooler) is still alive. Based on 2005's Love Songs For The Apocalypse, I would be slightly awestruck if he is. Johnny Hobo doesn't like very many things. He doesn't like God, he doesn't like indie rock, he doesn't like cops. Perhaps most importantly, I don't think Mr. Hobo likes you very much either. Those skinny jeans that you're wearing only make it easier for him to land a hardly-sober kick directed right at your nut-sack. All in all, the things that this beloved vagabond does cherish are heavily outweighed by that which he loathes.

Included in the short list of what Johnny does have a liking for are acid, whiskey, 40's, cigarettes, and amphetamines. In general, any substance which assists in detaching oneself from such bodily/spiritual woes as hunger, loneliness, grade school, bad politicians, and/or brings one closer to the sweet state of being a carcass is almost certainly fond to Johnny. This may sound something like the standard punk rock oi oi! mantra you've already heard, and in some respects, I suppose it is. What makes Johnny Hobo and the Freight Trains so special is their uncanny ability to amplify this beyond anything before it. This so-called amplification, however, is certainly not the result of expensive and powerful speakers attached to grating, grinding distortion pedals plugged into a $2,000 electric guitar. Nope, it's just Johnny Hobo and his (most likely garbage-picked) acoustic guitar with at least two missing strings, accompanied by what I imagine to be fellow equally-shelterless, semi-insane wanderers banging on the side of an abandoned freight train to keep the rhythm. Oh yeah, and some old harmonica that was probably found between car-seat cushions while hitching a ride across Nebraska.

Add to this grandiose set-up the C-chord, E-minor, and the almost completely configured G-major that drunken Mr. Hobo senior tried to teach little Johnny (most likely before either passing out, running off, or beating Mrs. Hobo). Supplement this well-rounded amalgamation with some even-more-off-key-and-less-artsier-than-Patrick-Stickles vocals, along with a few equally sloppy strumming patterns. Voila! Love Songs For The Apocalypse is born.

For 25 minutes, Johnny Hobo & co. give it their all, thrashing out in the most musically violent of ways at anyone and anything they're not so fond of, yet never ditching the carpe diem ultimatum that led their lives to where they presently stand. "May our only occupation be not having a job/ May the only cocktails we make be Molotov", Johnny Hobo howls out. Final verdict: Johnny Hobo makes your standard street-dwelling bum look like a pu....cat.

The record's final track, "DIY Orgasms" is a beautifully raw culmination of all that preceded it. Who needs love? Johnny Hobo doesn't. Who needs friends? Johnny Hobo has Johnny Hobo. What about beer and drugs? You're damn right Johnny Hobo needs them. How about sex? (See: song title)



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user ratings (142)
Chart.
4.3
superb
other reviews of this album
Paul Golden (4.5)
Close your eyes, Johnny Hobo and the Freight Trains are showing everyone what it's like to be like t...


Comments:Add a Comment 
iFghtffyrdmns
January 14th 2011



7047 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

working on trying to correct/clean-up the tracklist of the album, it was already like that when I wrote the review.

I think this is my 5th review, comments/criticisms appreciated.
Check these guys out if you're into raw, catchy, folky, acoustic, etc. punk rock.
Or check them out anyways because they're awesome.

Spare
January 14th 2011



5252 Comments


i have a couple wingnut dishwashers union albums and they're really great. i will try and look for this. also quality review.

Digging: Radiator Hospital - Torch Song

cvlts
January 14th 2011



8954 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

album. is. amazing.

jessem131
January 14th 2011



3 Comments


Wingnut Dishwashers Union is great, haven't heard this stuff. Last I heard Pat had entered in a rehab program...

ObeyTheCowGod
January 16th 2011



62 Comments


This is the best review ive ever red, kinda kept me laughing during the read. Havent checked them out, but i saw a copy of this in the store down street and this review made me wanna get it. props to you sir!

WithHorsesInHerEyes
January 18th 2011



650 Comments

Album Rating: 3.5

Finally someone reviewed this. Also, Pat got out of rehab in December.

FishTV
January 22nd 2011



168 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

i bought this record today and it's amazing

iamnot
March 29th 2011



73 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

ooh, i'm lovin' this review.
and this album is golden. personally i like Wingnut Dishwashers Union better, but. gimme Pat teh Bunny either way.

sixthgoldenticket
May 26th 2011



1176 Comments


but i take the beauty of chaos over any ugly perfection, i've woken up on the wrong side of the bed every day since 1987

iFghtffyrdmns
July 1st 2011



7047 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

I REMEMBER GRADE SCHOOL
AND STARTING TO NOTICE
THAT I WAS THE ONLY KID SITTING ALONE
I REMEMBER HIGHSCHOOL
AND STARTING TO NOTICE
THAT NOT MUCH HAD CHANGED SINCE I WAS SIX YEARS OLD


this is my cathartic listen of the day since my August is now ruined with the impending removal of my tonsils =/

AbyssalCreation
July 15th 2011



2041 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

This fucking rules.

sixthgoldenticket
September 18th 2011



1176 Comments


i spent half my day yesterday playing johnny hobo songs in a basement with my friends. punx.

Blackbelt54
September 18th 2011



4268 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

that sounds amazing

I'll probably bump this up soon

sixthgoldenticket
September 18th 2011



1176 Comments


do it!

it was super fun, we were all just fucking around playing guitar and decided that this was the one band we all knew

Blackbelt54
September 18th 2011



4268 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

ugh I've been so busy, I need to start playing music again, I haven't in a month or so

sixthgoldenticket
September 18th 2011



1176 Comments


what do you usually play?

Blackbelt54
September 18th 2011



4268 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

usually bass guitar

wabbit
November 24th 2011



6978 Comments


god this is good.

mxbrady
November 27th 2011



930 Comments

Album Rating: 5.0

^ I think you mean amazing.

wabbit
December 4th 2011



6978 Comments




nah bro the music is pretty shitty (and not in the good folk-punk way) but the lyrics are fucking
incredible so it rocks hard.



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