Review Summary: UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH15 of 16 thought this review was well written
It stands to reason that sufficient audio technology existed in 1997 to meld two separate yet similar sounds together. This is relevant because Master P’s quintessential contribution to Hip-Hop lyricism, the astonishing banality of his trademark “UUUUUUUUUUUUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH,” isn’t actually his voice. What actually happened is Big Percy M recorded the hapless braying of a geriatric goat embroiled in nerve-shattering fear while being gang-raped by a legion of especially well-endowed rhinos and melded it with the sounds of the goat’s unrelenting constipation pains from having its sh*t pushed in. As low-reaching and bottom dwelling as this is, it’s even more pathetic that droves of misguided, moronic pseudo gangsta flyboys lapped this up in the same way a dog furiously lathers its own sack. The fact the unequivocal worst song in Hip Hop history, the insidious, incestuous, absolutely abhorrent “Make Em Say UGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGH” is one of genre’s most popular songs does more than speak volumes of how low pop culture can reach, it almost begs for our country to be invaded and controlled by a ruthless, one-balled music hating dictator, because at least recalcitrant, overpowering tripe like this wouldn’t be released.
Aside from the inclusion of probably the worst song in the history of music, Master Percy’s unmatched ego plasters and ruins the majority of this microcosm of complete and utter sh*t. It’s bad enough that Soulja Boy level MC’s like Silkk the Shocker appear on no less than 9 tracks, and that the beats for the most part resemble something that The Fat Boys would have thrown away in a pile of rotting, uneaten vegetables, but what really inspires the overpowering desire to punch Percy directly in the face is he ruins the preciously few moments that don’t inspire an uncontrollable urge to tap your wrist veins, reach for a straight razor, and pine for the sweet release of death. Glossing over “I Miss My Homies,” which is a rap “ballad” so unquestionably horrendous that it makes the former Puff Daddy’s “I’ll Be Missing You” sound like the second coming of "Ready to Die" era Biggie Smalls, Percy unnecessarily throws his “UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH” randomly into nearly every four minute exercise in suckage. Right around the time cuts like “We Riders” and “Throw Em Up” begin to resemble competent Hip Hop songs, an unsuspecting UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH comes out of nowhere and makes you wish there was a cheese grater around to put your dick on. “Let’s Get Em” has one of the worst choruses of all time, but the second verse is totally badass until “UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH” greets you with all of the subtle grace of an flaming sledgehammer of horse feces. If there is any redemption at all, it’s the fact that “Tryin 2 Do Something” has an incredibly graceful beat, good enough to offset any UGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHs that attempt to save the day in the same way that Hitler’s misguided rage from being an impotent homosexual tried to save Germany.
Summary? F*ck You, Percy.