Review Summary: i took this review as serious as the band took this album24 of 42 thought this review was well written
you would think that there would be at least a LITTLE bit of talent in the Cyrus family, but alas, NOPE! Trace Cyrus outdid his entire family along with every single person that has sang Acky Breaky Heart
or fantasized about an 18 year old Destiny Hope Cyrus.
so, let me get to this album.
BE FOREWARNED: i am NOT judging the actually playing of the instruments. if i would have, i probably would have killed myself before the end of the 1st song.
opening track is called seventeen forever
. kinda cute, a song about having
sex with a girl that is 17. kinda weird, but i'll give him the benefit of the doubt that he was also 17 when he wrote this song. lyrical gem:
"Will you remember me?"
You ask me as I leave
"Remember what I said?"
Oh, how could I
Oh, how could I forget?
okay, got through that song. whats next?
now we have a little jingle called control
. pretty dancy, catchy but in a bad way. lyrical content is about two people getting ***ed up and then ***ing. mmmm okay, so is he still 17? singing about underage drinking and ***ing... great job billy ray!
"I'm coming down
bring me up
take it off
let's just touch"
so, trace is on drugs too. great role model.
if this third song doesnt blow me away, i will beat the *** out of this cd.. Kelsey
is next. little love song for a girl named Kelsey. lyrics are pretty bad but this song is the best out of the 3, so i'll tough it out for at least one song. by the way, who told trace, or the fat guy, that he could sing?
OH! i know this song! "SHAKE SHAKE SHAKE SHAKE I SHAKE IT! WHOOO THIS IS MY JAM!! ....oh ***, youre still here... uhhhhh next song"
Wish We Were Older
... hmmm kinda dancy, no real content.. empty synths and bad drumming... WTF DID THIS NIGGA REALLY SAY "WHOWEEOWEEOHOHH"??? *** THIS ***!
i.....feel so dirty.......i need to take a shower........