Millionaires
Bling Bling Bling!


1.0
awful

Review

by Max Paradise USER (18 Reviews)
June 24th, 2009 | 130 replies


Release Date: 2008 | Tracklist

Review Summary: This band taught me how to spell the word Alcohol!

Subtlety is dead. In the early times of Rock'n Roll, back when it was a 'dangerous' type of music that might be corrupting our children, you had to get around singing about things like sex with lyrics about 'making woopie' and how 'the girl gets around.' It was absolutely shocking when Robert Plant (of Led Zeppelin) shouted "Suck It!" in their song, "Communication Breakdown," and people knew things were changing with the Beatles' infamous track, "Why Don't We Do It In The Road?"

However, we are now in a new age, as far as acceptibility is concerned. Instead of having "a little help from my friends," the Millionaires proudly proclaim that they are not only going to "get ***ed up" but will also gladly "take off our underwear!"

And no, this isn't paraphrasing. These are direct quotes from their songs. Gaining popularity and fame on MySpace, along with their even-more-hated peers brokeNCYDE, they quickly became beloved among scene kids everywhere for their lack of intelligence and apparent love of alcohol, sex, and putting down girls who talk ***. However, unlike brokeNCYDE, they aim for making the most idiotic pop ever, instead of the most painful, er, crunkcore ever. Now, the music that was made by such pop idols as Britney Spears and the more recent Katy Perry was never known for its lyrical genius, but Millionaires have obviously taken this to a new level. Without even listening to the music, you know it's not exactly going to be a work of profound genius, what with the album title, as well as songs with names such as "Talk ***" and "I Like Money."

However, it's not until you listen to the music that you understand the true scope of this group's intentions and ability. Three seperate whiny, bratty girls complain to you about girls who talk *** about them (but they'll "pay the price," don't worry), and explain to you that, despite these girls' said ***-talking, they will still remove their underwear. They remind you that, if you didn't already get it, THEY LIKE MONEY, and they want any rich boy to look their way and make their day. And, they want you to "gimme that alcohol!"

So, okay, their lyrics aren't the best, and maybe they aren't exactly the picture-perfect moral standard, but the music can still be pretty good, right? Well...no. Not really. Not at all, actually. While pop music has never been the most original genre, these three girls take it to a new level by not only deriving their music from every pop artist ever, but not even using original instrumentals. No, I'm not saying that they recycle chord progressions and keyboard patches from other artists. I'm saying that they directly use the beats and loops and melodies that come with the GarageBand recording software. In fact, the only thing that was even created specifically for these songs is the vocals themselves, and they're pretty annoying vocals at that.

So all-in-all, this is like an incredibly obnoxious, whiny, idiotic rehashing of the worst pop music you can think of, with a dash of unoriginality tossed in. Yes, it's catchy, but not in a good way. Don't download this album. Don't waste your money, or your hard drive space if you choose to not pay for it. Not only will you have a good solid 28 mb less space on your iPod, but you will HATE yourself for having the chorus of "Alcohol" stuck in your head all day.

Unless, of course, you want to help three spoiled brats achieve happiness. After all, as they put it, "I Like Money - Bling Bling Bling!"



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user ratings (194)
Chart.
1.1
awful
other reviews of this album
Lambda (1)
Just as bad as it sounds....

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...

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Comments:Add a Comment 
Zip
June 25th 2009


5312 Comments

Album Rating: 1.0

Lol I have heard about this band...

TheGoddamnBatman
June 25th 2009


404 Comments


If we don't talk about them, then they don't exist.

PanasonicYouth
June 25th 2009


7411 Comments


They're going to be at Warped Tour, right?
I wonder if it's worth the ear-bleeding to see Streetlight Manifesto...

EDIT: I just listened to Alcohol for the hell of it and I swear my IQ just dropped at least 30 points.

Comatorium.
June 25th 2009


4126 Comments


It wont.

Digging: Silverstein - This is How the Wind Shifts: Addendum

Comatorium.
June 25th 2009


4126 Comments


Oh and good review.

PanasonicYouth
June 25th 2009


7411 Comments


Yeah, I'm starting to have SERIOUS doubts about going. Warped Tour is getting overrun with scenester bands. Needs moar punk.

Douglas
June 25th 2009


9110 Comments


slash good bands.

Digging: The Preatures - Blue Planet Eyes

YouAreMySilence
June 25th 2009


3727 Comments

Album Rating: 1.0

Oh my god.

astrel
June 25th 2009


2614 Comments

Album Rating: 1.0

I usually laugh at bad music, but this almost pissed me off. Idiotic hedonism at its worst.

Pastor of Muppets
June 25th 2009


237 Comments


Those idiotic scene girls you write about party at my apartment with my roomate. Alcohol IS their best friend, and they subsequently become my best friend.


I bang them

astrel
June 25th 2009


2614 Comments

Album Rating: 1.0

I hope you use protection.


illmitch
June 25th 2009


5429 Comments


i was hoping this would be inspired by cash money records

i guess not

Comatorium.
June 25th 2009


4126 Comments


so i torrented this. just cause. i went in expecting horrible music. i got halfway through in my bed and put on brokencyde cause i needed someone with talent.




wait what!?

Zip
June 25th 2009


5312 Comments

Album Rating: 1.0

I'm severely tempted to write another troll review... but I wont

Comatorium.
June 25th 2009


4126 Comments


d000 iT

Zip
June 25th 2009


5312 Comments

Album Rating: 1.0

^dude yes, it's like so fuckin heavy omg. Classic album guys, best lyrixxx ever.

Comatorium.
June 25th 2009


4126 Comments


Read the lyrics of hey rich guys. stuck up cunts. if someone doesnt do a troll review i will.

Comatorium.
June 25th 2009


4126 Comments


I did it. I had to.

Zip
June 25th 2009


5312 Comments

Album Rating: 1.0

No, I got the troll review, it'll be out sometime later today. There's definitely gonna be a reference to Prussian Blue in there.

Comatorium.
June 25th 2009


4126 Comments


Ah shit sorry man. Mine's terrible anyway.



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