DragonForce
Ultra Beatdown


2.0
poor

Review

by John weathered old reviewer Hanson STAFF
August 27th, 2008 | 544 replies


Release Date: 2008 | Tracklist

Review Summary: It's a passable album if you are crazy about power metal. However, the rest of us are sitting here covering our ears patiently, waiting for it to just end already.

I suppose the most important fact I can state about Ultra Beatdown is that I suppose I must have had it for over a month (perhaps more? I don’t know) and that I have only listened to it three times. One of those times was the obligatory first listen I felt I must give it, being an album that was undoubtedly going to be popular and thus NECESSITATING an opinion from me. The other two were forced, painful trips through the album. As I am currently listening to it trying to write this review, the only thing I can wonder is why the hell is there about 4 hours of Dragonforce material now, and all of it sounds the goddamn same.

Out of the 55+ minutes of ‘new’ music presented on Ultra Beatdown, there are really only two things that I can say surprised/impressed me. The call of “starchaaaaaaaaaser” in “Heroes of Our Time” was actually amazingly cheesy but still well placed for once, and “Reasons to Live” is a surprisingly well written song. That’s it. I’m pretty sure 90% of our readership will have heard Dragonforce, but for those of you who haven’t lets go on a little rundown of the ‘Force‘s sound.
  • The singer is one of the legions influenced by Geddy Lee/Bruce Dickinson, and is so flashy and theatrical with his voice that any potential he has is drowned out by the massive production placed on it.
  • It’s power metal. Yeah. Whoops.
  • The guitarists play the same leads and solos at blazing fast speeds all day, every day, and they don’t give a FUCK if you don’t like it, because they’re going to slow it down and still mess it up live anyways.
  • The lyrics are like if you made a soundtrack to an RPG based on Arthurian Legends then added a bunch of awful sci-fi fantasy crap to it. AKA hello soundtrack to Final Fantasy X.
  • You aren’t going to care what the drums or the bass (it exists?) sounds like, because I mean lets be honest: no one else really cares.
  • The keyboard player does his best to make this sound as the kids say “Super Nintendo” like. Funny thing, I never played a Super Nintendo game that sounded like a hyperblast of “dee dee doops”.

That is what Dragonforce have evolved into. Ultra Beatdown features the same guitar riffing, theatric singing and the rest of that stuff that doesn’t matter in regards to Dragonforce. Every song is a collection of verses used to show off ZP Theart’s voice, a bridge to maybe attempt a keyboard solo to solidify their video game worship/power metal-ness, and then a collection of solos that usually involve elements of their past songs played in a different key (if you’re lucky). Listen to “Reasons to Live” as it actually contains the first overall excellent Dragonforce song since “Fury of the Storm”. As soon as they cut down on the endless fret masturbation, maybe people beyond the metal community and guitar hero fags will really begin to appreciate the obvious technical talent the band has. Chalk up Ultra Beatdown as a win for previous fans, a loss for previous haters, and a whole lot of “isn’t that the band that had that really crazy hard song on Guitar Hero SICK” from anyone else.

MORE SONGWRITING PLEASE NEXT TIME THANKS.



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2.3
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Comments:Add a Comment 
Iluvatar
Staff Reviewer
August 27th 2008


16089 Comments

Album Rating: 2.0

the lamest review ever written and the only dragonforce review to ever not mention the guitarists names

mynameischan
Staff Reviewer
August 27th 2008


17946 Comments


HERMAIN LEE

Iluvatar
Staff Reviewer
August 27th 2008


16089 Comments

Album Rating: 2.0

Yeah dude I don't know of any way to make it look nice or else I would. I don't know if there is a way to bullet it or something but bah!

mynameischan
Staff Reviewer
August 27th 2008


17946 Comments


i bet dfelon would know

morrissey
Moderator
August 27th 2008


1688 Comments


Try doing

[list ]
[*]blah blah blah
[*] blah blah blah
[/list ] (without the spaces)


    [*] blah blah blah
    [*] blah blah blah
    [*] blah blah


Ok I got a bullet in there some how so just mess around with that codeThis Message Edited On 08.27.08This Message Edited On 08.27.08

morrissey
Moderator
August 27th 2008


1688 Comments


you need to put the asterisks in brackets like this [] then it will work

Iluvatar
Staff Reviewer
August 27th 2008


16089 Comments

Album Rating: 2.0

I just did it the hard way I don't know.

ninjuice
August 27th 2008


6760 Comments

Album Rating: 2.5

HERMAIN LEE

"My name is [actually] Herman Ri!"

Acre
August 27th 2008


847 Comments

Album Rating: 3.0

If only there was some sort of HTML format that made letters burst into flames. Only that formatting could stand up to the BRUUUTALITY of Dragonforce.

Pretty much spot on. I loved how gloriously cheesy Heroes of Our Time was, but the rest of the album is just WAAAAY too dull.

JumpTheF**kUp
August 27th 2008


2717 Comments

Album Rating: 1.0 | Sound Off

i want to rewrite my soundoff but since it's already been deleted once it will sound really gay if i do it again
v. good review, like my opinion but with less hatred

DeathThrashProg
August 27th 2008


500 Comments


haha, the summary is perfect! agree 100%

Captain North
August 27th 2008


6792 Comments


Never a fan of Dragonforce in the first place. They play fast and well, but c'mon, they make video game noises with their guitars. It's just wrong.

Altmer
August 27th 2008


5652 Comments

Album Rating: 2.0 | Sound Off

they use keyboards!

rasputin
August 27th 2008


14555 Comments


Really good review, I enjoyed it reading it. I'm probably not going to bother even listening to anything from this.

AtavanHalen
August 27th 2008


17927 Comments

Album Rating: 2.0

The review's a bit short and very ridiculous.
As opposed to the album, which is a bit long and very ridiculous.
Nice work.

Poet
August 27th 2008


5935 Comments

Album Rating: 3.0

“Reasons to Live” is a surprisingly well written song.

Even though it's a continuation of Through the Fire and the Flames.

IsItLuck?
Emeritus
August 27th 2008


4927 Comments


the first paragraph is awkward

Anyway, what is with metal bands picking really bad album art consistently? Like I thought Into Eternity's art was terrible, but this is fucking atrocious

mynameischan
Staff Reviewer
August 27th 2008


17946 Comments


only cuz he says "suppose" twice in the first setnence

AP07373
August 27th 2008


493 Comments


This is a staff review?
No offense, but this review is terrible. I mean who actually writes a review that contains name calling...but doesn't contain specific reasons for liking or disliking specific songs. Why was "Reason to Live" good? I guess I'll have to go buy it to find out because you sure as hell didn't tell me.
MORE REVIEW PLEASE NEXT TIME THANKS

Altmer
August 27th 2008


5652 Comments

Album Rating: 2.0 | Sound Off

This is a staff review?

didnt you get the memo at the top of the review mayte



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