King Diamond
''Them''


4.5
superb

Review

by K. McNichols USER (16 Reviews)
March 16th, 2007 | 52 replies | 14,182 views


Release Date: 1988 | Tracklist

Review Summary: A solid album worth the time and the buy, however King Diamond's previous release, "Abigail" is his best.

1 of 2 thought this review was well written

A brief history of King Diamond up to this point:
After leaving Mercyful Fate due to creative differences, King Diamond (a.k.a Kim Bendix Petersen) embarked on his self-titled solo project. Following his debut album Fatal Portrait, he released his magnum opus Abigail, which further elaborated on the path he had forged on the previous album. Developing concept horror stories into heavy metal albums, King Diamond delivers a memorable listening experience with each album. "Them" is King Diamond's third album, and in my opinion his second best.

I became a King Diamond fan after listening to Mercyful Fate. King Diamond work is similar to Mercyful Fate's, except the Satanic themes have been dropped for the aforementioned horror concepts. Anyone who has ever griped about Mercyful Fate's vocals is sure to dislike King Diamond's approach as it is basically the same. However, I think King Diamond gives a great and original/unique performance as per his competition in the genre. Now back to the album. "Them" features the master guitar work of the overlooked Andy LaRocque, who is also the cowriter of all of the King Diamond albums. He is also co-guitarist on Death's Individual Thought Patterns which is an insight to his diverse range of talents. His solos are top-notch, and the rest of the rhythm section also bring consistently solid work to the table throughout the album.

(Note: The main character in the album's story is King. King will always mean the character in the story, and King Diamond will reference the singer.)

01. Out From The Asylum
Most King Diamond albums begin with these brief intros. "Them" is no exception. This one starts with crashing thunder and dissonant sounds of King playing a run on the piano. According to King (also the narrator) it is a special day as King's grandma is coming home from "vacation". His mother can be heard saying "King, answer the door and stop playing that thing."
Overall, a good intro that sets the mood for the album's best and most catchy song
4/5

02. Welcome Home
The first great (real) song. All KD fans know this tune. I love how in the previous track at the end, King's mother says to open the door, and this track starts off with a drumroll, implying knocking. This song carries itself perfectly, the length is just right, the riffs are heavy, the singing is a mix of signature shrill shrieks and low growls, not to mention Andy LaRocque's solos which complement the song to the fullest extent.
5/5

03. The Invisible Guests
Another amazing song. This one explains how King walks in on his grandmother "speaking to no one." "Cups were rising in thin air..." This song sort of gets the horror portion of the album going, and KD's vocals are still great as usual. Andy rips with two solos that follow the melody nicely.
5/5

04. Tea
KD and the gang have no intent to let up. This song hits you with an acoustic intro that is kind of upbeat, but it doesn't last long, because Andy and co-guitarist Pete Blakk follow up with a heavy riff that slams your ears in fine contrast to the calm piece that preceded it. The lyrics are about King's grandma telling King about how the house is haunted and he starts to learn more about "Them," the mysterious presence that resides there. She tells him that the house is called Amon. In this track, the tea becomes blood, and King falls under his grandma's spell. "Nothing seemed to matter at all..."
King's vocals here are some of my favorite on the entire album as he uses his signature high wails but this time in a more melodic and subtle manner.
5/5

05. Mother's Getting Weaker
King's mother falls ill in this track, and his sister begs him to call for help. King cuts the phone line and Missy ends the track by crying "I hate you." The solo is another good one, however this song just isn't as engaging as the first four.
4/5

06. Bye, Bye Missy
Missy starts to realize that grandma is doing something to their mother. "Them" have decided it is time for her to die. After Missy smashes grandma's teapot, Missy is thrown into the fireplace. One of the highlights is Andy's strangely fitting shredding solo.
5/5

07. A Broken Spell
King can now see that "Them" have less power now that the teapot is broken. King's mind starts to fight the spell that has been put on him. The next thing he sees is smoke rising from the chimney, and he knows it is the remains of Missy. Another great development to a great storyline. "I knew she would be waiting for me in the attic.... I hate that bitch..."
4.5

08. The Accusation Chair
A standout riff starts this song, and KD finds an interesting way to follow the guitar with the vocal melody. King's grandma asks him to bring her outside. Once outside, King grabs her cane and kills her. Instead of going back inside, he runs into the woods. Of course, no track would be complete without some sort of skilled guitar work from Andy. Following the solo is one of the best section/interludes on the album.
5/5

09. "Them"
A sober instrumental and a brief little interlude to lull the listener into a false sense of serenity.
4/5

10. Twilight Symphony
The police arrive to arrest King in the morning. He tries to explain himself to Dr. Landau, the psychiatrist and character more fully developed in the follow-up to this album, "Conspiracy." Dr. Landau believes King to be crazy, and King is taken away to be committed. Dr. Landau won't tell King where his mother is, and basically this track is a preview of what is to come with "Conspiracy." Musically, KD and Andy continue to dole out great singing and riffs, respectively.
5/5

11. Coming Home
This track is a short outro which has another dissonant riff in the background. It tells of King's reunion with his grandma. King Diamond is the master of creepy minute-long pieces like these.
4/5

Overall, this is a great album that is easily worth the forty minutes you'll spend listening to it. I wouldn't hesitate to buy it if you get the chance, and I recommend Mercyful Fate if you like this band, as well as the sequel to this album, "Conspiracy."



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user ratings (258)
Chart.
4.2
excellent
other reviews of this album
jayfatha (4.5)
Think Judas Preist and Emperor sitting around a campfire telling scary stories....


Comments:Add a Comment 
Altmer
March 16th 2007



5652 Comments


Ok for a tbt but I don't like tbt reviews

jrowa001
March 16th 2007



8750 Comments

Album Rating: 4.0

welcome home is such a great song. i loved how Jay from Clerks II dances to this song in the movie

NeverFading14
March 16th 2007



380 Comments


I crack up every time i hear this guy's voice

Doppelganger
March 16th 2007



3124 Comments


Alright review, I guess...

And off topic. The Clerks movies would've been the greatest ever if 300 had never come out.



Tyler
Emeritus
March 16th 2007



7928 Comments


The quotes need to disappear in that album title.

trustxdialect
March 16th 2007



1502 Comments


And off topic. The Clerks movies would've been the greatest ever if 300 had never come out.


Hahahahahaha.

..serious?

Deth
March 16th 2007



13 Comments


The quotes need to disappear in that album title.


No, the quotes are in the album title.

Tyler
Emeritus
March 16th 2007



7928 Comments


They still need to disappear.

rattlehead42147
March 16th 2007



1345 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

this was my first review and yes the quotes are in the album and song titles
Clerks II is what turned me on to King Diamond, although I was already a Mercyful Fate fan

rattlehead42147
June 27th 2007



1345 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

i just realized how much this review sucks compared to my newer ones, i hate tbt's now.

LifeInABox
November 6th 2007



3708 Comments


I do too, but it was a pretty good tbt. I find tbt's much more attractive with some sort of bolding or underlining to seperate track names.

BallsToTheWall
October 27th 2008



44164 Comments


GRANDMA WHAT WAS IT LIKE....TO BE ON THAT HOLIDAY SITE
Welcome Home makes Clerks II so much more metal as a movie.

Hawks
October 27th 2008



34491 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

Agreed. I see you're digging the new COF album Balls. Good to know I'm not the only person that likes it.

Digging: Equilibrium - Erdentempel

BallsToTheWall
October 27th 2008



44164 Comments


Chan's well wrriten review aside, it's a good album.

rattlehead42147
December 12th 2008



1345 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

leave your Cradle of Faggotry comments on their page

SteelErectedb4you8er
December 26th 2009



2613 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

Not as good as Abigail, but it is still an awesome album.

MutnikSpusic
March 20th 2010



560 Comments


what a baaad intro! it was so bad I eventually abandoned reading the review

EnCrypt.
March 27th 2010



882 Comments


Hail Satan

Urinetrouble
March 27th 2010



5754 Comments


GRRRAAAAAAANNNNNNNDDDDDDDDDMMMMMMAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!

clerks 2 lol. but seriously this album rules

walfernu
April 16th 2010



80 Comments

Album Rating: 4.5

Terrific and terrorific album. As great as it gets. I completely agree, Andy Laroque is an amazing and underrated guitar player but you forgot to mention that half of the solos on this album (and Conspiracy) are done by Pete Blakk who is also a great guitarist and a perfect team-mate for Andy.



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