10 of 14 thought this review was well written
Snoop Doggy, DAWWWWG. Snoopy is back and he's come real this time with "The Blue Carpet Treatment". Straight from the LBC (represent, bitch). "The Dogg" strayed from home for a bit on his way to super stardom that saw him doing everything from producing some questionable talent, pimping out little kid's, appearing in Girls Gone Wild videos, doing some acting, taking on celebrity pretensions, and pretty much falling off his rap game to some extent. And to top it all off he quit smoking the chronic for awhile. Talking about "family" and being a "good influence" on children and shi....wtf is up wit dat, 'yo...
Well someone must of smacked some sense into the boy because Snoop has fired up a blunt and is rollin' down the street once more, one hand on the wheel and one holding some gin 'n juice. LBC, throw your hands in the air and wave 'em like you just don't care, Snoop is back. Word...
After stating his case in the opening short "Intrology", the gangsta lean get's started right off with "Think About It", where Snoop makes the bold statement of "This Blue Carpet Treatment record is deep to me. And I have to let my peoples know how deep it is to me with some real talk". And for a second you wonder if his "peoples" are the eight year old fans of the Snoop cartoon series. Not to worry though, as Dogg proceeds to bust out rhymes like a hoochie mama busting out of her tank top. The groove is Barry White inspired '70s soul, the beats dope, and the rap smooth and silky. Bow-wow-wow. And I ain't talkin' Lil' Bow-Wow. This isn't kiddie stuff. We're back in the hood, West Coast style, homey.
"Don't you know that I'm loco?" Um, no. But it don't matter because Snoop rolls down the Eastside in this violent vision of street life and street gangs called "Vato" that plays out like some Martin Scorsese film with South Central locations in place of Brooklyn and Ice Cube in place of Deniro. "Run nigga', run nigga/Duck nigga' duck nigga'/Run Muthafuc.ka run/I wouldn't be the nigga' that I am/ If I didn't pop muthafuc.ka's in the mouth/Goddamn...", rhymes our ressurected gangsta, deep bass, groove, and flowing keyboards watching his back. And of course it wouldn't be gangsta and it wouldn't be old school without some bitches up in this mothafuc.ker. And "Bitch I Knew" lets you know it don't matter who you are, you gettin' sexed and not much more from this playa'. "It all goes back to '85/When I started getting pussee every day of my life" Snoop declares before rolling off a litany of "bitches" from the fat chick that was his first to a girl "So vicious/Lips so lucious/ Suck a nigga dick and have it shinin' like some dishes". By the time this fat beat highlight reel of sexual conquests is over Snoop has done everything from sexing every 'ho in the 'hood to advising the President on how to get some play from fat assed Monica and keep it on the down low. Snoop is the man to be sure, and this is old school sexual boasting at its best. Just don't trust him 'round your
bitch, this song seems to suggest. 'Cause homey would cop that booty as soon as you turned your back. Have to pop a cap in that nigga...
"Psst!" with Jamie Foxx is another track that let's the sexual bravado of Snoop run wild with Foxx adding dope falsetto backing vocals, telling some 'ho he'll "treat it like it's never been treated" and "don't you wish your boyfriend was a gangsta like me", all boast and no shame. Just a matter of fact. And "Don't Stop" is a classic cruisin' rap that lets us know it never stops. Gangsta 4 lyf, fool. "If you trying to hang with the gang, don't stop/If you making money trying to sling/If hangin' in the hood is your thang, don't stop/You know where I'm from/The war zone" goes the rhyme, finger on the trigger, Compton and the LBC straight behind. Keepin' it real. And just to let you know a nigga knows what's up even if he be bangin, "Imagine" struggles with what might be and what actually is and seems to say maybe at the end of the day being gangsta is only worth as much as it isn't. But either way its just the way it is.
The beats are tight on this album, Snoop's delivery smooth and silky, his rhymes hard, this isn't for everyone. Hardly a hip-hop record of the sort we have come to expect from Ditty, Jay-Z , or even Snoop Dogg as recently as last year, this is hardcore gangsta rap. All spare beats and crude macho boasting with just enough rhythm and soul mixed in to keep it all flowin', the old Dogg has returned to his roots to turn some old tricks. And it's enough to make you long for the days of the old East Coast/West Coast feuds, rappers gunned down in Vegas, and Suge Knight throwing punk as.s white boys off balconies. Yup, them were the days, mothafuc.ka's. And on The Blue Carpet Treatment Snoop Dogg lets you know he hasn't forgotten his folk, although some may of forgotten him. You can take the thug outta the ghetto, but the ghetto will always live inside the thug, it seems. Always rollin', keepin' it real, crackin' bitches and smokin' poo butt niggas without even thinkin' about it. LBC, Compton, step up. Your soundtrack has arrived. Same as it ever was, same as it'll always be. Roll on, nigga'....
Album Rating: 3.5
this is my review of the new Snoop album. hope you enjoyed it...
EDIT: please keep an open mind about this review. i may of not been too clear on my motives for writing it in this style. if you don't like it please leave a comment and let me know why. if you think it was written well enough, please don't give it a negative vote. you can just skip voting all together if you personally object to it but think its written well, nonetheless. if you don't like it for other reasons please comment and let me know why. i am checking back in daily to read feedback. i mean no offense by this review, nor is it a mockery. the spirit of this album is harsh. i simply let the record lead me. perhaps a bad idea, but it seemed like a good one at the time. i could ask to have it deleted or i could edit it, but have decided to let it stand as is. thanks for reading This Message Edited On 11.28.06
I have to say you overdid it on the gansta talk. It wasn't an easy read.
I didn't know you were an original gangster, JXD. I wanna fuck you sounds like a good song.
Album Rating: 3.5
hey don't tell me about the gangsta talk, tell Snoop
it's a gansta rap album, yo. and i was just in da LBC last week. keepin' it real, homey...This Message Edited On 11.24.06
o dear JXD :lol:
Great review, but I don't think I'll be checking this out anytime soon. Snoop isn't my thing
Haha, this was great. This album is a great as you say, much better than his previous.
Album Rating: 4.5
The review is written like crap. Reminds me of the white kid at school who says "I'm bust yo cap off with my grill piece"
I wish the writer would've taken this seriously.
Album Rating: 3.5
i did take it seriously, you dope. you want a different kind of review, you write it. you didn't have to neg it just because you don't like the style of the piece. the review is succienct, to the point, and easy to understand. you're free to write your own if you think you have more to offer...This Message Edited On 11.25.06
Oakland > LBC
Album Rating: 3.5
if you neg my review at least have the balls to leave a comment and tell me why, you pricks...This Message Edited On 11.25.06
Album Rating: 3.5
it means the beats are good/strong. they're dope, solid, skillful, da shi.t....This Message Edited On 11.25.06
Album Rating: 3.5
ok but how does one describe a beat? this is a rap album. its not even what i would call hip-hop. its rap in a non musical sense. i don't consider Rap like this "music" per se. it is very old school, the rhymes are front and center, the "music" if thats what you want to call it, is secondary. when it is present at all. i did say the first track was Barry White like, soulful, etc....and at the end i said "the beats are tight, Snoops delivery smooth and silky, lyrics hard"...etc. i also mentioned its hardcore gangsta rap. which gives you an idea of what it sounds like. this is ghetto music. black music. for white folks as much as Vince Gill is for black. i thought i got that over. if you don't know what that sounds like, well, listen to the album....This Message Edited On 11.25.06
Aye, I definitely agree with the people who are saying the slang and lingo is excessive to the point that it makes reading the review extremely difficult.
A lot of the commentary you made is extraneous and doesn't add anything to the review at all except to showcase that you know ebonics.
For instance, this entire passage that is bolded does nothing except give the impression that you're having a bit too much fun:
Hell yeahs, my homey. This guy speaks my language. By the time this fat beat highlight reel of sexual conquests is over Snoop has done everything from blowing loads in bitches faces to advising the President on how to get some play from fat assed Monica and keep it on the down low. Snoop is the man, fo' sho'. Just don't trust him 'round your bitch. 'Cause homey would cop that booty as soon as you turned your back. Have to pop a cap in that nigga...
That's just an example, but really, how much of that is necessary to help describe the album? The slang and lingo you used is torturous and ambiguous to read after the first instance.
It's not a bad review once you discuss the music, but a fair chunk of your review could be removed and it would make it better. Sometimes more is less, especially when it comes to you putting the ebonics on overdrive.
I don't mean to sound noxious or incendiary or anything, I'm just trying to explain as best I can constructively as to why this review was a far cry from, as SOP said, your usually high standards of reviewing.
One suggestion I have is to review more of the genre under one of your aliases and see how that goes, or just review more of the genre to get a feel for how to review it.
I'm all for when people review material outside of their 'normal' listening and I give lots of e-props and respect for that, but this was a proverbial Casey at the Bat here.
It's clear that you tried to have fun with this (I'm positive you did), but you dragged the ebonics gimmick so much that it became terribly distracting.
Don't pet the sweaty things, though, JXD... I have confidence in you that you'll bounce back next time.
I actually thought some thug had jacked JXD's account and wrote this review lol @ my own joke.
I thought the review was plenty entertaining and didnt get old. Then again, I am easily amused
"That's That" is so terrible. The chorus is such cliche hip hop shit. Way to reminscent of "Drop It Like It's Hot" too.
So, Carson Daly posts on are forums now?
Snoop Doggy, DAWWWWG. Snoopy is back and he's come real this time with "The Blue Carpet Treatment"
What is the blue carpet treatment, elaborate.
"Run nigga', run nigga/Duck nigga' duck nigga'/Run Muthafuc.ka run/I wouldn't be the nigga' that I am/ If I didn't pop muthafuc.ka's in the mouth/Goddamn..."
You might want to try editing your quote format, it is very awkward to read like this.
Other than this, the first three paragraphs are pretty good, they're amusing, light-hearted and bring across your points. But I think the gangsta talk should have stopped there, or slowed down significiantly.
Hardly a hip-hop record of the sort we have come to expect from Ditty, Jay-Z , or even Snoop Dogg as recently as last year, this is hardcore gangsta rap.
Great, but don't mention it in the conclusion. You sort of alluded to it in the previous paragraphs, but I never really got that message until you spelled it out in the conclusion. And aside from one or two setences that should be changed in the conclusion, it is once again a pretty good conclusion.
I personally wouldn't neg this review, but you went overboard at times with it.
Album Rating: 3.5
thanks everyone for taking the time to read and comment on my review. i shall show more restraint if i ever review another gangsta rap album. yeah, perhaps i did have "too much fun" with this one without considering the reader enough. i gave it a shot. i could change it, but i think it can stand as is for better or for worse.
yeah JJom, i thought of putting it on my JSG account, which has a few similar reviews. sort of reckless style. but i thought it reached my regular standards, so...if i ever find myself doing something similar i 'll consider it more carefully.
and thanks for being constructive, everyone. your time and thoughts are appreciated This Message Edited On 11.25.06
Ch, be a man.