Nick Cannon vs. Eminem
2009-05-11 by Nick Butler EMERITUS | 85 Comments

Controversy is the best free publicity, as nobody understands better than Eminem - and the controversy over new album Relapse, due for release on Friday, is beginning in earnest. For now it's centering around the track "Bagpipes Over Baghdad", in which Eminem describes a stalker-style longing for Mariah Carey, a woman he allegedly enjoyed a romance with a few years ago (something Carey herself has been swift in denying).

Unsurprisingly, Carey's current husband isn't too happy with lyrics that include 'Nick Cannon better back the f*ck up, I'm not playing, I want her back, you punk/Nick Cannon, you prick, I wish you luck with that f*ckin' whore.' Like all good internet tough guys, Cannon has responded by posting a blog filled with confusing half-threats.

Quote:
"A mediocre (at best) Eminem record that sounds like it was written in 2001. At first, I thought it was old material that had been dug up from when dude 'fantasised' about having a pretend fling with Mariah. ... But all of a sudden I hear my name in the verse! My first reaction was like, 'This is his new s**t? Wow, that's too bad.'

"Maybe I'm going too far, but I thought we got past the days where white men could spew vulgar obscenities at our beautiful queens and get away with it. What's next? Are we going to let this trash say something horrible about our lovely first lady, Mrs. Michelle Obama? Or would Marshall have talked sideways out of his neck like this about Oprah Winfrey? This act of racist bigotry cannot go unnoticed. Calling my wife a 'c**t' and a 'whore' is way worse than anything Don Imus could have ever said. So trust, repercussions will be served. Anybody got Al Sharpton's number?!"

"So, Miss Marshall, I'm going to make you wish you never spoke my name and regret the ungodly things you said about my wife. This is going to be fun! It's however you want it! Just remember, you did this to yourself! Your legacy has now been tainted from this day forth! You will now be known as the rapper who lost to corny-ass Nick Cannon!"


Nick Cannon married Mariah Carey in April, and is one of at least six people name-dropped on the new Eminem album that I'd never even heard of.

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Band Page: Eminem

Comments:Add a Comment 
Iai
Emeritus
May 11th 2009

3553 Comments


Also newsworthy: MediocreAtBest gets a namedrop

BallsToTheWall
May 11th 2009

44164 Comments


Wasn't Nick Cannon on Nickelodeon at one point?

willfellmarsy
May 11th 2009

3849 Comments


wow...

JizzInMyPants
May 11th 2009

2368 Comments


wdf? what eminem said wasnt even remotely racist...i swear.. people are to quick to label peeps racist these days

Athom
Staff Reviewer
May 11th 2009

17195 Comments


...

Phantom
May 11th 2009

8930 Comments


Scathing

fireaboveicebelow
May 11th 2009

6837 Comments


the only racist thing is nick name dropping only black people

PuddleSwimmer
May 11th 2009

1457 Comments


Was calling him 'Miss Marshall' intentional?
If so, that's more than enough punishment for eminem, how embarrassing is that? He's a dude...

kitsch
May 11th 2009

5107 Comments


this more than makes up for the album.

Spamue1G
May 11th 2009

1292 Comments


This act of racist bigotry cannot go unnoticed.

Yes, because this is so much worse than him writing a song graphically describing how he wants to graphically murder his ex-wife...

kitsch
May 11th 2009

5107 Comments


does nick cannon remember what happened in 01? he was actually saying prejudiced things back then, hahaha.

bloc
May 11th 2009

34663 Comments


dang cannon got mad skillz to be marrying carey. plus, he's prolly a better snare drummer than eminem.

Digging: Anberlin - Lowborn

willfellmarsy
May 11th 2009

3849 Comments


definitely

kitsch
May 11th 2009

5107 Comments


nick cannon is young enough to have masturbated to carey fantasies when he was a teenager.

TNY
May 11th 2009

571 Comments


LOL rant is LOL worthy.

browncore
May 11th 2009

26 Comments


seriously?

kitsch
May 11th 2009

5107 Comments


srsly

AggravatedYeti
May 11th 2009

7684 Comments


hahaha, 3 people with no careers (either WAY past their prime or never had one) arguing about how they don't have careers.
at least Nick knows he's a corny ass. *shrugs*

willfellmarsy
May 11th 2009

3849 Comments


...This Message Edited On 05.11.09

withALMONDS
May 11th 2009

214 Comments


aggravated hit the nail on the head

willfellmarsy
May 11th 2009

3849 Comments


what is your avatar's name on tim and eric b/c i cant remember it and it is bothering me...ps mariah carey is badass and still hitin number 1 so she cant really be said to be past her prime...

withALMONDS
May 11th 2009

214 Comments


iirc it's chippy

but im not sure

EyesWideShut
May 11th 2009

3093 Comments


i wouldnt say its gonna be nick vs eminen cause was just talking sh.it like he always does. anyway relapse isnt that bad..

Nikkolae
May 11th 2009

4747 Comments


cannon is just adding more fuel to the fire, i dont care if it sounds bad, but every fucking black celebrity that feels attacked all of a sudden turns to al sharpton, i dunno, either way marshall says bad stuff bout blacks, whites, chinesses, latinos and pretty much anyone

Digging: We Came Out Like Tigers - Ever-Crushed at Pecket's Well

willfellmarsy
May 11th 2009

3849 Comments


O, there' my chippy!

bloc
May 11th 2009

34663 Comments


exactly, so if they ain't out to get eminem like cannon is, they are probably very shy.

PanasonicYouth
May 11th 2009

7411 Comments


Not racist comment is not racist. But it is really, really dumb rapping about a supposed old fling that happened years ago. Isn't he married still...?

scyther
May 11th 2009

1606 Comments


Mariah is the hottest fucking woman in the world.

fireaboveicebelow
May 11th 2009

6837 Comments


I hope you're kidding

scyther
May 11th 2009

1606 Comments


I would take socially relevant lives to be with that.

PanasonicYouth
May 11th 2009

7411 Comments


.......she's so fake looking, dude.

PuddleSwimmer
May 11th 2009

1457 Comments


She's gorgeous and angellic

bloc
May 11th 2009

34663 Comments


i dunno, i'm kind of on the fence. but i will say she looks better now than when she was younger.

natey
May 11th 2009

4170 Comments


eminem is gay

withALMONDS
May 11th 2009

214 Comments


she looks good, i'll give her that

but that's not ground 0 for her face

you can tell she turns into a 4(at most) without the 5 pounds of makeup

natey
May 11th 2009

4170 Comments


she, like Beyonce, is just weird looking

scyther
May 11th 2009

1606 Comments


The word weird is one reserved for those who lack the intelligence to properly describe something.

withALMONDS
May 11th 2009

214 Comments


-strange
-not normal
-something is different about her face that makes you want to stare but not because you're turned on
-fucked up

pick any of those they all work fine

fireaboveicebelow
May 11th 2009

6837 Comments


he could've just said abnormal and ugly but that would be mean..oops

withALMONDS
May 11th 2009

214 Comments


nah

that's still being relatively nice

tinathefatlard
May 11th 2009

1597 Comments


Maybe I'm going too far, but I thought we got past the days where white men could spew vulgar obscenities at our beautiful queens and get away with it.
This act of racist bigotry cannot go unnoticed
What a dumbass,Em didn't even say anything about race, I'm so tired of the idea that black people cannot possibly be racist.
So trust, repercussions will be served
That was years ago, get over it and get a job, Sparkling Wiggles.

scyther
May 11th 2009

1606 Comments


I'll bet the net worth of every planet in the Universe that not a single person here would decline to have sex with that woman.

Willie
Moderator
May 11th 2009

15875 Comments


That's a weird way of putting it.

Digging: Emperor - In The Nightside Eclipse - 20th Year Anniversary

natey
May 11th 2009

4170 Comments


not outside of wedlock

withALMONDS
May 11th 2009

214 Comments


people that arent attracted to women that look so fake that they're almost impossible to look at without thinking "why the hell do you put on literally pounds of makeup every day

work on your acne instead
or use lotion
or something god damn"
would decline sex with her

so

normal people would decline sex with her

scyther
May 11th 2009

1606 Comments


Normal is so fucking relative it shouldn't even exist.

withALMONDS
May 11th 2009

214 Comments


replace normal with: people who's parents are divorced and actually had to learn how to grow up earlier than the day they moved out to college

natey
May 11th 2009

4170 Comments


i'm sorry you've had such a rough life

Willie
Moderator
May 11th 2009

15875 Comments


^^^ This isn't a therapy session...

withALMONDS
May 11th 2009

214 Comments


no that doesnt actually involve me

i was just putting that out there because most people call that normal and call me a pothead

scyther
May 11th 2009

1606 Comments


So your saying the only people who mature at a young age are those whose parents are divorced? Apparently growing up doesn't teach you how to defend against an imminent scud missile thats about to blow your logic to smithereens smaller than a person living in a microscopic colony inside a grain of sand.

natey
May 11th 2009

4170 Comments


scyther you consistently make the most confusing allusions

withALMONDS
May 11th 2009

214 Comments


i dont need to win this argument i can just do this

*puts on sunglasses and backflips into moonroof of limo as it drives away*

scyther
May 11th 2009

1606 Comments


Only to find out that I'm your driver.

fireaboveicebelow
May 11th 2009

6837 Comments


she's not worth this hella retarded argument seriously

but yeah for the record I would "decline sex from her"

Jaspersskinnyarms
May 11th 2009

11 Comments


Hopefully everyone will keep treating Eminem like he isn't relevant anymore and he will just go away. He is picking fights with D-list celebrities for attention for crying out loud.
And to make it worse, what I have heard from the new album has been pretty terrible.

scyther
May 11th 2009

1606 Comments


There are like five songs on it that are fucking great but he does need to rethink his approach, definitely.

CrazyFool84
May 11th 2009

1080 Comments


Strange that Cannon chose to turn this into a racial thing, that's sorta cheap. I wouldn't be too concerned about what Em says on this record anyway, from the sounds of it so far it's going to taint his career by itself.

MassiveAttack
May 12th 2009

2688 Comments


Yea he had no other angle I'm assuming and choose the most appropriate due to his race haha. Funny stuff.

Apostle7
May 12th 2009

235 Comments


Be careful. If you say Nick Cannon is a corny-ass, you're a racist.

theskyatnight
May 12th 2009

60 Comments


[q]
dang cannon got mad skillz to be marrying carey. plus, he's prolly a better snare drummer than eminem.
[/q]

DID YOU KNOW:

Nick cannon did not play a single note of any music used on that movie. just faked it really good.

Burn2Burn
May 12th 2009

2378 Comments


wait how is this racist?

scyther
May 12th 2009

1606 Comments


It isn't, thats the funny part.

TNY
May 12th 2009

571 Comments


I would not have sex with Mariah Carey unless it was for some large lump sum of cash.

She literally looks like a monkey. And no, not cause she's black. Her facial features are that of a monkey.

scyther
May 12th 2009

1606 Comments


http://youthoughtso.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/mariah-carey1.jpg

It doesn't count that that applies to you and me too right?

Asiatic667
May 12th 2009

4647 Comments


Mariah Carey is not hot, and nick cannon is an idiot. And Relapse will flop

natey
May 12th 2009

4170 Comments


Relapse kind of makes me want to record a rap album, because it would be better

burnafterbreeding
May 12th 2009

1466 Comments


^well put.

BornDeadBuriedAlive
May 12th 2009

398 Comments


Mariah Carey is hot, Eminem is past his prime, and Nick Cannon is a retard that's playing the race card for no reason. I would really like to know how that dipshit got a chick like Mariah Carey.

lauriej
May 12th 2009

1711 Comments


article i lol-worthy, nicely written too.

jingledeath
May 12th 2009

7104 Comments


excellent

kitsch
May 12th 2009

5107 Comments


i wouldnt bang carey for money

a5thdiad
May 12th 2009

123 Comments


what does he mean by "OUR beautiful queens"? is he half irish too?

principles_of_paradox
May 12th 2009

5 Comments


cannon is an idiot. a black man of all people should know what racism really is.

BSX
May 13th 2009

1633 Comments


1st-I wish Eminem was gay

2nd-Kylie Minogue is the hottest woman in the world not Mariah, Scyther

3rd-Relapse will either sale at a decent level or flop

4th- I like tacosThis Message Edited On 05.13.09

Digging: La Roux - Trouble In Paradise

scyther
May 13th 2009

1606 Comments


I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say Miranda Cosgrove is the hottest woman on the planet.

Apostle7
May 13th 2009

235 Comments


Be careful. She's not legal yet.

marksellsuswallets
May 13th 2009

4848 Comments


Can she even drive yet?

Apostle7
May 13th 2009

235 Comments


Don't think so.

JizzInMyPants
May 13th 2009

2368 Comments


oh hell no, hottest girl in the world is 2007 era mya nicole http://galleries.amateurallure.com/aa-mya01/img03.jpg

...that is b4 she bacame a crack whore and look like this..

http://www.ladirectmodels.com/view.php?img=2&id=229&gender=female

Waior
May 13th 2009

11425 Comments


HEY PAM BEESLY. WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING.

Also, Carey and Eminem?

Hollow
May 13th 2009

263 Comments


Probably a publicity stunt.

HipsterHolocaust
May 13th 2009

774 Comments


WhErE bE tHe ReVeReNd?!?!

jcfiasco
May 23rd 2009

465 Comments


are you kidding me? Nick Cannon is so not talented it hurts my brain. The fact that he has enough of an ego to think he's still relevant at all is amazing to me. People may say that about Em too, but honestly the new cd is amazing. Regardless, Cannon is opening up something he shouldn't. Em doesn't hate black people. He's equally awful to all races and and peoples haha.

sethsabeast
June 8th 2009

15 Comments


"Are we going to let this trash say something horrible about our lovely first lady, Mrs. Michelle Obama?"

Nick Cannon needs to shut the fuck up and stop trying to sound like he's a gentlmen. He shoud just stick to trying to be funny on wild and out and enjoy his super crazy, but fine bitch.. If he wants to try to go against Eminem it will not be pretty



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