|I GOT ONE I GOT ONE|
Gore is Deftones' most technical album.
|I was taking a stroll under the docks in the harbor and one collapsed on top of me. I'm under a lot of pier pressure.|
|Why doesn't my Grandfather eat meat? Because he's dead.|
|What did a pencil say to another pencil? MyNameIsPencil|
|What's the difference between Michael Phelps and Hitler? Phelps could finish a race|
What genre did Lars Ulrich single-handedly create? Math rock
SowingSeason has American Idiot at a 5, FOB's Infinity on High at a 4.5, Yellowcard's Southern Air at a 4.7, and Wish You Were Here at a 3.9 (no really, I shit you not check out his ratings)
|q: why did the monkey fall off the tree?|
a: because it was dead
q: why did the squirrel fall of the tree?
a: because it was stapled to the dead monkey
q: why did the elephants wear tiny green felt hats?
a: so they could sneak on the pool table without anyone seeing them
q: why did the elephants have yellow patches on the soles of their flip-flops?
a: so they could hide upside down in the yellow custard without anyone seeing them
q: what did the pirate say when he turned eighty years old?
a: "i'm eighty"
|What has 9 arms and sucks?|
|so far so good boiz|
The joke that never ends
|extra flavor through my comedy|
|"What genre did Lars Ulrich single-handedly create? Math rock"|
i dont get it
|I was going down on this chick when I noticed the taste of horse semen. I thought, "Oh grandma, so that's how you died."|
|I bought these shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day|
|Most people don't know about the true story of Jesus. Jesus was a Mexican stuntman who died while making a movie. At the funeral, his mother said to the director, "Jesus died for your scenes."|
|Mexican Jesus also loved watching two player basketball games. Or as it was known in Mexico, Juan on Juan.|
|q. how many dead cats can you fit into a bathtub|
|Two logicians walk into a bar. The bartender asks them if they both want a beer. The first one says 'I don't know' and the second one says 'yes'.|
|Sinternet that's outstanding.|
|An engineer, a physicist and a mathematician are staying in a hotel.|
The engineer wakes up and smells smoke. He goes out into the hallway and sees a fire, so he fills a trash can from his room with water and douses the fire. He goes back to bed.
Later, the physicist wakes up and smells smoke. He opens his door and sees a fire in the hallway. He walks down the hall to a fire hose and after calculating the flame velocity, distance, water pressure, trajectory, etc. extinguishes the fire with the minimum amount of water and energy needed.
Later, the mathematician wakes up and smells smoke. He goes to the hall, sees the fire and then the fire hose. He thinks for a moment and then exclaims, "Ah, a solution exists!" and then goes back to bed.
|A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks:|
"Why the long face?"
"My family died in a car crash."
|my dad texted me today|
|How many Alzheimers patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb?|
To get to the other side
|Three Latvian are brag about sons. “My son is soldier. He have rape as many women as want,” say first Latvian. “Zo?” second say, “My son is farmer. He have all potato he want!” Third Latvian wait long time, then say, “My son is die at birth. For him, struggle is over.” “Wow! You are win us,” say others. But all are feel sad.|
|damn, i used to be a fan of X artist...|
but now i'm an air conditioner
|Yeah I'm liking Sinternet's and Sevengill most|