Star-Spangled Kid

Reviews 2
Approval 100%

Soundoffs 3
News Articles 6
Band Edits + Tags 213
Album Edits 743

Album Ratings 244
Objectivity 63%

Last Active 09-03-16 11:50 am
Joined 09-20-09

Forum Posts 49
Review Comments 1,624

09.03.16 Blood Money Bitches10.17.15 Need help IDing Jap Post Rock Album
09.11.14 What The Fuck Is This U2 Shit On My Itu07.30.14 Minstrel Show Music
05.10.14 First Time Long Time07.02.13 New Things Like Dead Dogs
06.14.13 Zombie Songs05.14.13 Songs For The Job Hunt
04.25.13 Songs For The Supernatural Forces That 03.31.13 I'm Sorry Jesus But Today Is For Baseba
03.25.13 Songs For After Midnight03.17.13 Songs For Sunday 10: Heads Bashed Right
03.14.13 You Asshole02.12.13 Base Ball Predictions
01.30.13 Songs About Decapitation01.27.13 Songs For Sunday 9: Pancakes On A Day T
01.19.13 How Do You Like You're Blue Eyed Boy Mr01.14.13 Sputnikmovies: The Return To These Gold
More »

Various Athletic Competitions Ranked

Using Advanced scientific metrics of true subjectivity user American L. Ohno will rank (from best to worst) the various 'sports' one can catch on TV. This will be the first in a series of lists Mr. American L. Ohno will put to the test his patented metric, ASMTS (pronounced 'ass-mats'). Next up one Dr. American L. Ohno* will use ass-mats to rank the quality at the various craft brews available for purchase at Billy Blueblood's Liquor, Spirits, & Tobacco.
1The Baseball Project
Volume 1: Frozen Ropes and Dying Quails

MLB Baseball - AssMats Rating 224.7
2John McCutcheon
Sermon on the Mound

MiLB Baseball - AssMats Rating 219.1
3The Black Angels
The Black Angels

Professional Baseball Not Affiliated W/ ML Orginizations - AssMats Rating 216.6
4Yo La Tengo
I Can Hear the Heart Beating as One

College Baseball - AssMats Rating 216.5
Crooked Rain, Crooked Rain

Little League Baseball - AssMats Rating 199.2
Note: I know of no high school baseball game that's broadcast nationwide which is why it's omitted from this list. Also yh I know no Non-Amatuer baseball leagues un-affiliated with the MLB aren't broadcast either but I didn't think of that 'till too late, so it's included.
6Deadstring Brothers
Starving Winter Report

Billiards - AssMats Rating 196.3
7 The Dream Syndicate
The Days Of Wine & Roses

Speedskating - AMR 191.9
8Simple Minds
The Best of Simple Minds

NASCAR - AMR 186.5
9Johnny Cash

Marathon Running - AMR 174.3
10Little Feat
Sailin' Shoes

Archery - AMR 169.9
11American Football
American Football

Strongest Man Competitions - AMR 165.4
12Strong Arm Steady
In Search of Stoney Jackson

NFL Football - AMR 165.1
13 Football, Etc
Away Game 7"

High School Football - AMR 158.8
14Fine Young Cannibals
The Finest

Hot Dog Eating Competition - AMR 158.0
Basketball Shorts

NBA Basketball AMR 156.6
March Madness AMR 155.5
16Swamp Thing
Swamp Thing

Swamp Axin' - AMR 132.7
17The Dickheaded Fucks

Hockey - AMR 126.4
Fuck The Nineties...Here's Our Noize

That Red Bull Thing Where People Jump Off a Ledge With Wings Made Of Aluminum Foil, Tinsel, and Tampons Strapped to their Backs - AMR 112.1
19Lets Go Bowling
Music to Bowl By

Bowling - AMR 110.1
Fast and Comfortable

Beer Pong - AMR 89.4
Well it should be televised, I guess it'd be better than "Hole in the Wall"*
which AMRs at 74.5
Wipeout AMRs at 245 the second highest total, coming in behind only Competitive Orgy.
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