Charmander Jones.....The U.

Reviews 213
Approval 98%

Soundoffs 207
News Articles 311
Band Edits + Tags 371
Album Edits 1,260

Album Ratings 2312
Objectivity 77%

Last Active 07-02-15 1:57 pm
Joined 05-20-07

Forum Posts 18
Review Comments 45,730

12.01.15 Last Team Standing11.29.15 Hungover
11.28.15 Stay Blessed11.24.15 Don't Stop Believing
11.20.15 POW!!11.15.15 Cam Newton
11.11.15 Brace Yourselves!11.10.15 A Douchebag's Gym Playlist
11.08.15 NFC Underdogs11.03.15 M.E.T.A.L.
10.27.15 Fast Riffs10.22.15 Frostbitten
10.21.15 Media Hype10.20.15 $20
10.14.15 Swallowed Up By The Sea10.12.15 The Hourglass of Life
10.11.15 Apple Cider Iced Tea10.08.15 Starbucks Iced Lattes
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Animals Id Like To Turn Into After I Die

I want to believe in rebirth. And as for trees not unless I can be a branch to Yrggsdaill.
1The Best Pessimist
To Whom It May Concern

Jackal. Howl like creatures of the nether realm, feast on the dead and haunt graveyards. Morbid and interesting creatures + Anubis is the fucking shit.
2Gregor Samsa

Owl. Owls are ominous, can swivel their heads and ruthless hunters. Tied to the goddess of the underworld, decay and death, and witchcraft the owl is one kvlt fucking creature.
Triumph Through Spears Of Sacrilege

Alligator/Crocodile. Only animal I've seen that scares the shit out of me. Unlike sharks, these creatures want to grasp you with their teeth, bring you down to the bottom and suffocate you. Honored by the Egyptians like a god. Well there was a god with an alligator head who consumed the malevolent.
4The National
High Violet

Lynx. A badass looking big cat. Known for being solitary, tied to the occult, and living in the dark. Rumored to piss excellence. It's said the lynx's urine turns into gemstones.
5The Reptillian
Full Health

Dragon,basilisk,serpent,etc. No reason necessary.
...And Man Will Become The Hunted

Leopard. Another majestic and brutish big cat. Christians aligned it with the devil so obviously leopards are badass.
7The Soft Moon
The Soft Moon

Deer. In Irish mythology there's a forest god with antlers coming out of his forehead. Roaming the forest side looking for berries and returning to solitude.
Sabbat Noir

Beaver. If beavers aren't the most cuddly animals alive I don't know what is. Plus I want a waffle shaped tail and build a dam with my claws and teeth.
To the Eden


Vampire Bat. Blood sucking minions of the twilight that will frighten yo children.
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