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Last Active 06-08-17 9:58 am Joined 03-13-15
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| Ranked | Weezer
With Weezer's masterpiece Pinkerton nearing its 20th anniversary, I've decided to rank all the Weezer albums. Let's begin... | 10 | | Weezer Hurley
I really, really hate this album. I really do. It's an album of songs that have no effort whatsoever put into them and that even after a listen it's hard to remember what they sound like. Even Raditude wasn't awfully bland like this was. On Hurley, we find a 40 year old Rivers Cuomo singing about meeting girls in the lunch room in high school, changing the word "socks" to "sex" and thinking it's hilarious, and butchering an actually good song with a potato and thinking it makes it lo-fi. Newsflash: it fucking doesn't. | 9 | | Weezer Raditude
This album is awful, no doubt. But even this is better than Hurley. At least I actually like "The Girl Got Hot", for some odd reason. And "If You're Wondering" is a great opener as well. But this album has the absolutely terrible "In The Mall", the Slumdog Millionaire trend-chaser "Love Is The Answer", and an awfully butchered version of Alone 2's great "Can't Stop Partying" featuring Lil Wayne writing the most cliche rap verse of all time. Raditude is awful. That's all I could say about that. | 8 | | Weezer Maladroit
When I first got into Weezer, I used to love this album. I still think it's decent, but to me, it has no substance. What's "Take Control" even about? In fact, what are any of the songs on this album about? I mean, I know "Keep Fishin'" is just another decent quality love song, and "Space Rock" is about Rivers being pissed at his fanbase, but is there anything on this album really about anything? The musicianship is good, but really, that's all that's there. | 7 | | Weezer The Red Album
This album was really, really strange. It had some of Weezer's greatest, most daring, artistic works since Pinkerton, while it included such awful snoozers such as "Cold Dark World" and the just-average "Thought I Knew". It was decent, but it's inexcusable that the greatest songs that could've been included on the album were bonus tracks. This was the album that made "this is my alternate Red tracklist" one of the most annoying phrases for Weezer fans to hear. | 6 | | Weezer The Green Album
Upon release in 2001, Weezer fans were surprised by this album. How could the same band that made the ultra-personal and musically-intense Pinkerton make an album where every guitar solo is the vocal melody repeated? Well, they did. And honestly, it was pretty good. It featured some really underrated songs: "O Girlfriend" is an emotional closer that reminds me of early Beatles songs like "I'll Be Back" and "Smile" features a melody that most other bands couldn't even touch halfway. It wasn't another Blue or Pinkerton, but when you look at what it tried to be, it succeeded in every way. | 5 | | Weezer Make Believe
"Wait," you say. "How is Make Believe, which is commonly agreed to be one of Weezer's worst, if not THE worst Weezer album, at number 5?" Here's why. Make Believe is, in my opinion, an incredible album. This was the most personal and direct Weezer album in years, due to Rivers beginning to meditate at the advice of producer Rick Rubin during the album's production. And it shows; in songs like "Pardon Me", Rivers essentially apologizes, as plain-spokednly as possible, for some of the awful things he said and did to others before, and at least attempts to fix it. Although I can see why other people may not like Make Believe; to me, while it may not have the absolutely brilliant lyrical content of "Pinkerton", it's as personal as it. And that makes me happy. | 4 | | Weezer Everything Will Be Alright in the End
We all know what happened to Weezer: the absolutely indefensible Raditude and Hurley. These albums weren't just bad; they turned Weezer's reputation from "the lovable geeky band with the fun songs we all know and love" to "insufferable 40 year olds who need fucking Lil Wayne to be relevant nowadays". After Hurley, Weezer faded from public view for a while, focusing on touring and even headlining their own cruise. This was until 2014, when they finally released a new album. But it wasn't with another Hurley. It was with one of their greatest albums yet. Everything Will Be Alright In The End wasn't perfect, but it was what Weezer needed to at least get their feet on the ground. It wasn't just a comeback lyrically, it was a comeback musically: it ended with a 3-track long instrumental jam - the phenomenal Futurescope Trilogy. Everything Will Be Alright In The End proved Weezer were back, and that they were back for good. | 3 | | Weezer The White Album
Weezer's newest album takes us back to what made them huge in the first place, while expanding their sound in new directions. "L.A. Girlz", the best song on the album, sounds like it could've been on the Blue album, while "Jacked Up" and "Thank God For Girls" take Weezer to places they've never been and still retain their quality on the way. Overall, it's an incredible album, and that's way more than I could've asked for only 6 years after Hurley. | 2 | | Weezer Weezer
Weezer's debut is absolutely incredible, pure power pop goodness. From the still-catchy 22 years later "Buddy Holly", to the song that made me feel comfortable with myself being a geek "In The Garage", and to one of the greatest album closers of all time "Only In Dreams", The Blue Album is a brilliant debut album that holds up just as well as it did in 1994 in 2016. | 1 | | Weezer Pinkerton
Weezer's sophomore effort was the album that got me into music and songwriting. It is a triumph of a record that goes really deep, often uncomfortably so. But it's all for the best. Pinkerton was trashed upon its release by many critics and fans alike, but it grew in stature to be looked at as one of the best records of the 90s. And for good reason. After Rivers tried, failed, and scrapped a concept album called "Songs From The Black Hole", he unknowingly made a better one in its place; an album about loneliness, heartbreak, and trying and failing to find love. "Tired Of Sex" is the story of someone who's tired of meaningless sex and who wants to escape and find real love. "Across The Sea" is Rivers at his loneliest: he's so lonely that he depends on a fan letter from a barely legal Japanese girl for comfort. At the end of it all, all he can say is that he's sorry. It's okay, Rivers. This album changed my life. | |
Drifter
06.07.17 | Just got/checked Pinkerton yesterday and I love it. Probably my favorite Weezer now | Conmaniac
06.07.17 | 6 and 8 should be higher and 4 should be lower but top 3 are correct! | onionbubs
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