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10-13-2005, 10:31 PM
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#1 |
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Bananas in pajamas...
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Iowa
Posts: 561
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Challenge 96 - Voting
If you're happy and you know it.....shut the f*ck up and vote.
My lazy votes. (Actually just really busy at work right now....meh): silenceevolves - 4th Dancin’ Man - 1st A Perfect Sonnet - 5th Lowridenn - 2nd xKONRADx - 8th RunAmokRampant - 6th Broken String - 10th TojesDoLan - 13th Crimsonpunk - 14th ATC - 7th ITRIEDVOODOOONCE - 9th StuP - 11th LeeRoberts - 12th Benjamin Lee South - 3rd Last edited by Disco Dragon; 10-20-2005 at 04:23 PM. |
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10-13-2005, 11:02 PM
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#2 |
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Greyskull
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Winchester, VA
Posts: 4,039
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If I was happy and I knew it I wouldn't cut my wrists and black my eyes.
silenceevolves 1 Dancin’ Man 4 A Perfect Sonnet Lowridenn 9 xKONRADx 10 RunAmokRampant 2 Broken String 11 Disco Dragon 3 TojesDoLan 5 Crimsonpunk 13 ATC 6 ITRIEDVOODOOONCE 7 StuP 14 LeeRoberts 12 Benjamin Lee South 8 Last edited by A_Perfect_Sonnet; 10-21-2005 at 06:29 PM. |
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10-14-2005, 01:21 AM
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#3 |
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The Chosen
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Fûck Feûdalism
Posts: 1,876
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6-silenceevolves- its reasonable, revise repetition of 'differences'
8-Dancin’ Man- nice idea, 'rubble' line goes unfinnished 2-A Perfect Sonnet- unconventional, monumental? i cant think of changes... 9-Lowridenn- it was written well enough, but... lameish? 0-xKONRADx- FATALITY 7-RunAmokRampant- drawn out 12-Broken String- nice start.... 3-Disco Dragon- less style near the end, but i like it alot 10-TojesDoLan- hmm, ok. 13-Crimsonpunk- nice effort? 1-ATC- fucking right 4-ITRIEDVOODOOONCE- short, but nice 11-StuP- meh 14-LeeRoberts- no. 5-Benjamin Lee South- a little sick but well written Last edited by xKONRADx; 10-18-2005 at 11:55 PM. |
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10-14-2005, 01:44 AM
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#4 |
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With your powers combined
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: California
Posts: 1,165
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1 silenceevolves
3 Dancin’ Man 2 A Perfect Sonnet X Lowridenn 13 xKONRADx 4 RunAmokRampant 12 Broken String 11 Disco Dragon 5 TojesDoLan 14 Crimsonpunk 9 ATC 10 ITRIEDVOODOOONCE 7 StuP 6 LeeRoberts 8 Benjamin Lee South Last edited by Lowridenn; 10-20-2005 at 10:41 PM. |
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10-14-2005, 04:58 AM
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#5 |
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Planeteer 4 life
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Melbourne, Australia
Posts: 4,463
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Im gonna be pretty busy this week with exam preparation and all so I don't think I have the time or the effort at the moment to give everyone at least a half decent crit. But if you ask for one I'll reply.
silenceevolves 6th Dancin’ Man 2nd A Perfect Sonnet 3rd Lowridenn 7th xKONRADx 8th Broken String 11th Disco Dragon 4th TojesDoLan 9th Crimsonpunk 14th ATC 1st ITRIEDVOODOOONCE 12th StuP 10th LeeRoberts 5th Benjamin Lee South 13th Last edited by RunAmokRampant; 10-17-2005 at 02:25 AM. |
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Digging: Daitro - Y |
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10-14-2005, 06:33 AM
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#6 |
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∞ days deleted
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Ithaca is Gorges. So are vags
Posts: 12,034
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I was happy and knew it... then I joined MX
silenceevolves - I wrote a good crit but lost it. Basically good, but tighten it up. Certain lines I disliked very much. 3 [b]Dancin fuck I went in to edit my votes and accidentally deleted most of them. In the end it was to give Sonnet 2nd and ATC 1st. Those are the top two right now anyway. I think I gave Lowridenn 3rd. Last edited by Dancin' Man; 10-20-2005 at 11:57 PM. |
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10-14-2005, 01:47 PM
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#7 |
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Eat Yourself
Join Date: Sep 2004
Posts: 814
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I would be happy and know it...... if i could think of something witty to say
silenceevolves - 4 Dancin’ Man - 6 A Perfect Sonnet - 5 Lowridenn - 8 xKONRADx - 12 RunAmokRampant - 2 Broken String - 10 Disco Dragon - 6 TojesDoLan - 3 Crimsonpunk - 14 ATC - 1 ITRIEDVOODOOONCE - AMAZING!!!! StuP - 13 LeeRoberts - 9 Benjamin Lee South - 11 Last edited by ITRIEDVOODOOONCE; 10-20-2005 at 03:48 PM. |
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10-14-2005, 08:06 PM
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#8 |
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Dear diary, Jackpot!
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Essex, england
Posts: 310
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The more knowledge I gain the less happy I become
silenceevolves Dancin’ Man A Perfect Sonnet - 1st Lowridenn - 4th xKONRADx RunAmokRampant - 2nd Broken String Disco Dragon - 3rd TojesDoLan - 5th Crimsonpunk ATC ITRIEDVOODOOONCE StuP LeeRoberts Benjamin Lee South Last edited by Crimsonpunk; 10-14-2005 at 08:16 PM. |
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10-15-2005, 05:06 PM
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#9 |
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Moderator
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 28,237
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That song was in the Metallica Icon circle-jerk fest on MTV. yeah.
 silenceevolves 2 Dancin’ Man 6 A Perfect Sonnet 1 Lowridenn 3 xKONRADx 7 RunAmokRampant 4 Broken String 9 Disco Dragon 8 =) Crimsonpunk 12 ATC 5 ITRIEDVOODOOONCE 10 StuP 11 LeeRoberts 13 Benjamin Lee South 14 Maybe the voting was a little rushed. Just maybe. Last edited by TojesDolan; 10-18-2005 at 05:30 PM. |
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Digging: Giant Squid - The Ichthyologist |
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10-15-2005, 06:36 PM
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#10 |
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Geez...It happened again!
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: NE PA, USA
Posts: 282
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silenceevolves 1
Dancin’ Man 2 A Perfect Sonnet 3 Lowridenn 4 xKONRADx 5 RunAmokRampant Disco Dragon TojesDoLan StuP Crimsonpunk ATC ITRIEDVOODOOONCE LeeRoberts Benjamin Lee South Last edited by Broken String; 10-20-2005 at 06:44 PM. |
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10-15-2005, 10:29 PM
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#11 |
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Thru leaves,over bridges
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Vancouver, BC
Posts: 6,746
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*clap*
silenceevolves - 3This has a lot of potential. Ideas go unexplored sometimes but its pretty good. ps: what is adumbration? I refuse to feel stupid for not knowing that. Dancin’ Man - 2. This is your best in quite awhile. The industrial feel is captured quite well. A Perfect Sonnet -5. I'm torn between genuinely loving some of this and hating other parts. Lowridenn -11. Didn't quite jump out at me though its not a bad job at all. Just seemed like a collage of a lot of songs. xKONRADx - 8. I like the puns and the catchiness in this though as words on a page, the repitition was too immediate. RunAmokRampant - 6. You really must experiment with line length a little more. On first read, its hard to get through your work though I end up liking it after. Broken String- 13. I don't doubt it working musically, but the lyrics feel like an afterthought. Also, the phrase public enemy is jarring to me. Disco Dragon -4. Overrhymed in parts. Decent otherwise. TojesDoLan- 12. You need to focus. You're reaching on this one. Also, not every line must be a sentence by itself. Taking out 'to' and 'and' and similar words is allowed if it helps flow. Crimsonpunk - 14. You wrote a mediocre song and had the gall to announce it as a 15 minute attempt. Self-deprecation or arrogance, whatever it may be, it makes me judge you harshly. The imagery is hackneyed and the theme has been explored far too much in any case. ATC - L'etat. C'est moi. ITRIEDVOODOOONCE - 10. I shall get back to you. This score subject to change. StuP - 9. This, again, has potential. I'd like this a lot more without stanza 2. LeeRoberts - 7. I like the simple connection I can feel with this. Benjamin Lee South - 1. The title isn't all that. However, the poem is awesome. A wee bit of tightening and it's magical. Last edited by ATC; 10-20-2005 at 09:21 PM. |
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10-16-2005, 12:59 AM
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#12 |
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___
Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 2
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silenceevolves - 5th
Dancin’ Man - 9th A Perfect Sonnet - 4th Lowridenn - 1st xKONRADx - 8th RunAmokRampant - 2nd Broken String - 11th Disco Dragon - 7th TojesDoLan - 14th Crimsonpunk - 13th ATC - 3rd ITRIEDVOODOOONCE - 10th LeeRoberts - 12th Benjamin Lee South - 6th Last edited by StuP; 10-22-2005 at 11:40 AM. |
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10-16-2005, 01:09 PM
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#13 |
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Registered User
Join Date: Aug 2005
Posts: 63
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****. I wasn't done with my song.
Oh well. silenceevolves Dancin’ Man - 2 A Perfect Sonnet - 5 Lowridenn - 3 xKONRADx - 7 RunAmokRampant - 4 Broken String - 13 Disco Dragon - 1 TojesDoLan - 11 Crimsonpunk - 14 ATC - 6 ITRIEDVOODOOONCE - 8 StuP - 9 LeeRoberts - 12 Benjamin Lee South - 10 Last edited by silenceevolves; 10-21-2005 at 04:34 PM. |
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10-19-2005, 09:48 PM
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#14 |
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Registered User
Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 6
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silenceevolves - 8. I am not sure as to what I think of this.
Dancin’ Man - 2. You, my friend........are very talented. A Perfect Sonnet -3. I do believe this is beautiful. Lowridenn - 7 Not so bad, but not my forte. Some of it is just a beautiful portrayal of nostalgia, and some is just blah. xKONRADx - 5 Great. Aside from the "cha" slang. RunAmokRampant -4 Very good job. Broken String- 14 I do not dig. Disco Dragon -12 This rhyme scheme is sketchy. It kind of destroyed it for me. You shouldn't rhyme, unless you know you can rhyme well. TojesDoLan- 10 Not the worst, not the best. Crimsonpunk - 13 This is either a failed attempt at a death metal song, or.........I do not even know. ATC - 1. This sort of writing is rare. It brings me to a better place, knowing someone can write so well. ITRIEDVOODOOONCE -11 I like the idea you're getting at, well......the lyrics are a little too mediocre. StuP - 6 This is not bad at all. I would like to aknowledge, that this has potential for greatness. LeeRoberts - 9. Again, the rhyming isn't amazing. Other than that, it's a good one. Benjamin Lee South |
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10-22-2005, 11:05 PM
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#15 |
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I like paiste
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Cleveland
Posts: 236
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silenceevolves-11
Dancin’ Man -1 I really like the concepts you used. A Perfect Sonnet 4 It is like a fairy tail or something in someones mind, it was interesting. Lowridenn - 12 It felt to me like you were trying to write this, just didn't flow for me. xKONRADx -2 That was great. RunAmokRampant -8 Broken String -3 TojesDoLan -9 Crimsonpunk -6 ATC -5 ITRIEDVOODOOONCE - 7 StuP -10 LeeRoberts -13 Benjamin Lee South -14 |
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