Challenge 79 Voting

[ATC]

dfelon204409
RunAmokRampant
6945
I Am Vikingcore
addicted_tochaos
xKONRADx
d0ped0g
jurialmunkey
Subtledagger
Buzzrat
Pixiesfanyo

we who are about to vote salute you!

dfelon- good work. i do love a great opening piece for a challenge.
i especially love the little couplet and the solitary line along with
the stanza before it. i cant seem to find a common thread to it is all
that i find lacking...3

runamok- its good, middle metallica-ish. but i think the chorus lets you
down a little. i know it fits in, however. make it a little stronger
in terms of the basic theme portrayal. while good, its not emotional
enough on its own without the song...8

6945- as usual, i like your song. no surprises there. funk-ay... 2

i am vikingcore- symphony of souls, the title reminded me of hybrid megadeth.
symphony of destruction + tornado of souls. lyrically not amazing, but
i reckon musically it would be pretty heavy, just like you intend.
i find it flows exactly to the tune of symphony of destruction. intended?..9, the most singable, but i cant get the megadeth thing out of it. sorry.

addicted_tochaos- get off your lazy as$ and write your dam'n essay.

konrad- i likey. hebrew/aramaic in a song is something i'd like to hear.
the " " parts are nicely done...6

d0ped0g- its like a good poet got entangled in a livejournal-reading girlfriend.
it's really good, in parts. if its meant to wax and wane, then
i like the way two lines per stanza are angsty and two lines are lyrical...5

jmunk- nice way to begin. whisper to scream and back again. moth to flame
thing's done well. a little contradiction does not hurt, so meh..4

subtle -the italic parts are nice and intense. the rest isnt always. it
gets there towards the end, but you could do well with a few changes
to the first stanza. still good...7

buzzrat- spelling errors abound. but i get your point, so eh.
it doesnt flow or feel right. i can't really see the linkage of patriotic
ardor to anything else, which was the topic of your piece. sorry. ..10..coherence, baby.

pixies - was that childbirth? its pretty well written. me likes. ...1, easily first. gotta love them placenta songs. creepier lightning crashes.

[DFelon204409]

DFelon204409
RunAmokRampant
6945
I Am Vikingcore
addicted_tochaos
xKONRADx
d0ped0g
jurialmunkey
Subtledagger
Buzzrat
Pixiesfanyo

This challenge is sort of stacked with old people. Awesome.

I really like stacked old people. Awesome.

DFelon204409 - 1st without much contest.
RunAmokRampant - 8th
6945 - 7th
I Am Vikingcore - 9th
addicted_tochaos - 3rd
xKONRADx - 6th
d0ped0g - 5th
jurialmunkey - 4th
Dimebag Darrell - got shot to death and I really don't give a **** so stop reminding me.
Buzzrat - 10th
Pixiesfanyo - 2nd

[d0ped0g]

scores subject to change as it was very hard to seperate the top 5 or 6 well

Dfelon204409 - 1st
this song is quite uncharacteristic of you. u took a fresh approach and u get extra points for that. its a very erratic song structure, which would probably effect its songability (well, ability to put to music). Nothing short of amazing the description and master of language that went into each line... but i dont really feel the song as a whole.
8.2/10

RunAmokRampant - 8th
no doubt can write lyrics well, but it seems to lose my interest, and not necessarily stray off course in terms of subject matter, but stray the reader off course. another fresh approach, this time from a new forumer. Doesnt have the control over the direction of the peice or the master of language that would seperate a possible winner.
6.7/10

6945 - 6th
interesting song. definately different from the norm. Not really trying to impress. Extra points for all those aspects. Havnt said that, all those things also excluded you from achieving the "WOW!" factor, and meant that i didnt really connect with the song as well as i could.
7.4/10

I Am Vikingcore - 9th
not really a "unique" approach, but definately one that we dont get around here that often... in the sense that you seem to take a "fractured" approach for your songwriting. Seems abit cliche at times (eg. "begins at the end and ends at the beginning"), although there are some lines that stand out (eg. "wrenched from the body to echo once more"). Doesnt seem to communicate much more than the words you've put down on screen. But definately envokes some array of dark emotional appeal
6/10

addicted_tochaos - 5th
i've always liked every single song you write and this one is no exception. Doesnt really stand out tho. No "WOW!" factor ... for me anyway. Sorry for the small crit.
7.5/10

xKONRADx - 7th
first off, i dont really dig the religious propaganda (i know thats definately the wrong word to use, but you probably know the word i'm looking for anyway)... although the repitition of "your will be done" adds a nice touch, although i'm not sure what emphasising that line is trying to communicate. Everything else is done quite well, and i really have no comments for this apart from, good job :/. could be better tho
7/10

jurialmunkey - 4th
hmmm.. its been a while since i've witnessed your bizarre style of songwriting. You definately have HUGE talent, but wether it communicates to the audience/reader or not, obviously is subjective, but in the case of your style will influence this aspect negatively. Lyrically and poetically, notthing short of amazing tho. I really like the intro (for its originality, and fresh approach) and the chorus. I've enjoyed your other songs in the past alot better tho.
7.7/10

Subtledagger - 3rd
lets get one thing off my head first... i LOVE the title. well done. i also LOVE the line "all the dreams you ever stole". Now onto the rest of the song... i didnt like it that much. Not to say it wasnt good... it was a bloody good song... i'm just saying it in comparison to your other songs, it just didnt live up. 5th stanza is definately my favourite... next fav is 2nd.
7.8/10

Buzzrat - 10th
yeah... shocking spelling. Lyrics are good in a comical way. I like the term "patriotic ardour"... but you probably coulda manipulated that chorus so that ardour would end up rhyming with before. I cant really view it as much of a serious peice tho.
5.5/10

Pixiesfanyo - 2nd
is that last line part of the song, or merely a comment at how you'll see how ur song does. lol. :/. Lyrically fabulous. Seems too incomplete tho in terms of both the size of the peice and making the reader/audience understand the song by giving them a breeding ground (well... not a BREEDING ground, but i just decided to call it that) for them to interpret it. This is what serperated you from winning
8/10

[pixiesfanyo]

dfelon204409 - 3
RunAmokRampant - 9
6945 - 7
I Am Vikingcore - 8
addicted_tochaos -6
xKONRADx - 5
d0ped0g - 4
jurialmunkey - 1
Subtledagger - 2
Buzzrat - 10

[xKONRADx]

DFelon204409-3- it feels like youre trying to bring your style into the ring with a different kind of message. i dont know. something just doesnt fit. i dont feel it.

RunAmokRampant-7- like the ending alot. also the storyline/message is good. but the voice you use doesnt sound right to me.

6945-8- i really dislike the vocabulary in your song and it all goes to ruin the use of the challenge word, which should be given at least an equal importance to other words/phrases in your song.

I Am Vikingcore-9- simple. meh.

addicted_tochaos-5- i always love your stuff. this one less so. but its still good. the subway/highway part threw me off. rest was solid.

xKONRADx- "that was cliche" wtf you dont ****ing know what its about dumbass.

d0ped0g-6- i just really dont like your phrasing, ideas are good but it kills the feeling when you dont present them right. its all opinion though, i see others have ranked you first.

jurialmunkey-1- i wont pretend to fully understand what youre saying, but i can definately feel it. proably my favorite so far.

Subtledagger-2- very cool. but i dont feel the emotion behind it. anyway i dont think you have to worry.

Buzzrat-10- put some time into it if you ever want to get anything out of these challenges.

Pixiesfanyo-4- Its a girl! congratulations. very nice.

[jurialmunkey]

Original Post: Nice to see some quality lyrics... Pretty much everyone nearly wrote on a very similar topic.... but good to see everyone took a different apporach... this is what the challenges where supposed to be about when we started them.... 3 YEARS AGO!!!! FUk!! thats insane!

Dec 11, '04 11:51PM US Pacific Time: Just putting in my ranks in case I don't get crits done in time. Like always; May be subject to change. May not.


dfelon204409 #2

RunAmokRampant - #4

6945 - #8

I Am Vikingcore - #10

addicted_tochaos - #6

xKONRADx - #7

d0ped0g - #3

jurialmunkey - Who the F... stole my avatar and is parading around as Sarcasm Princess!!??

Subtledagger - #5

Buzzrat - #9

Pixiesfanyo #1

[RunAmokRampant]

dfelon204409 3rd
Very nice piece. Your use of vocabulary is good and fits well with the structure of the song. Took me few reads to get a good grasping of the concept of the song but overall a decent effort

RunAmokRampant

6945 2nd
Very unusual piece I must say. Effective nonetheless and I only needed to read it once to understand the meaning. You gave a common theme a new fresh approach

I Am Vikingcore 9th
The angry short bursts of words is effective to about halfway, the becomes a bit monotonous which ceases the effect it had. Otherwise an ok effort

addicted_tochaos 8th
I like your reference to Subway. A good piece sort of amongst the middle score. Thats pretty good considering this challenge had decent lyrics from all competiters. Its not amazing or as a much of a standout but nothing is wrong with it that I can pick out.

xKONRADx 6th
I like the religious passages in this song. Not used too much and the last part ends the song well leaving readers/listeners something to think about. nicely done.

d0ped0g 1st
The only problem I have with this song is the constant 4 lines in each stanza structure. Not willing to take some risks with some oddities in the structure which would make the piece more appealing because it looks bland and boring if it wasn't for the bolded text and the quote at the beginning and the 2 line part at the end. But lyrically good choice of wording and I ingored the occasional mistake in punctuation because this deserves to win

jurialmunkey 4th
Beautifully made piece this one. Nice and appealing structure and a nice flow of words. But I'm a bit lost to what the meaning is. Im assuming then its open to interpretation.

Subtledagger 7th
Hmmm a very violent piece. Very dark and brooding. You use some depressive words and also use the rose to give a nice effect in contrast to the rest of the song which is decent. Hard to score, because it depend in what mood i'm in whether depressed or happy.

Buzzrat 10th
I dont understand your partriotic part in this song. I dont find it relevant to the rest of the song which I found you need to develop further. Its too straight forward and the structure is quite different and I am unabe to decide whether its good or bad

Pixiesfanyo 5th
A nice piece butnI found it a bit vague but with a nice words you use, I'm able to picture what the songs saying. Not sure what its meaning is but nice imagery used

DFelon204409
RunAmokRampant
6945
I Am Vikingcore
addicted_tochaos
xKONRADx
d0ped0g
jurialmunkey
Subtledagger
Buzzrat
Pixiesfanyo

btw im eleventeen from beyond the grave

[6945]

5th…dfelon204409 7/10 Seems like a combination of diary, lyrical metaphors and prayer. I don’t think they really mesh to well. I did like the way the “neighbor’s pool” gave meaning to the piece

4th…RunAmokRampant 7/10 Good opening verse. Hmmm…I don’t follow the sand/ice correlation. I like the 2 line pauses but I do think they lack a little poetic flair. And a resolution at the end….good. I thought the struggle of indecision could’ve been stronger but a good piece nonetheless.

6945

9th…I Am Vikingcore 5/10 straight forward and simple. Mix with some power riffs and away you go

3rd…addicted_tochaos 7/10 Smoothly written, good pace with changes. But Hmpf…it doesn’t mean anything to me. I need that one little piece to give it meaning like Dfelon’s did. What is vawes?

8th…xKONRADx 6/10 interesting piece, the way you slowly sink to whaaaa? There’s good rhyming in lyrics and there’s forced/cliché. This is an example of good rhyming.

1st…d0ped0g 8/10 Nicely done.

6th…jurialmunkey 7/10 Difficult to score this. Very nicely crafted but ambiguous to a point where I’m at a loss, attaching any personal meaning

7th…Subtledagger 7/10 Dripping with insolence, it has all the dark buzz words casket, maggots,contorted screams. I guess the unapologetic way its presented is both its strength and weakness

10th…Buzzrat 5/10 had some good ideas and a few good lines but pretty rough overall

2nd…Pixiesfanyo 8/10 nice mood but…hey, is that some kinda love song? OH tonight s ardor…I see one nighter. Comatose huh? Gotta be a better word.

[i am the robots]

Originally Posted by I Am Vikingcore

DFelon204409
RunAmokRampant
6945
I Am Vikingcore
addicted_tochaos
xKONRADx
d0ped0g
jurialmunkey
Subtledagger
Buzzrat
Pixiesfanyo

btw im eleventeen from beyond the grave

have to quote myself, can't edit from my normal account.

4th…dfelon204409 blah, it's pretty good, but not the best here, I like the metaphors, but like above, "the neighbor's pool?"

5th…RunAmokRampant nice opening verse. the rest is kinda, vague? still pretty good

Me…I Am Vikingcore as you all guessed, it's heavy and angry, the symphony of destruction flow was an accident lol

3rd…addicted_tochaos good flow, not much else to say, it's real good

7th…xKONRADx good lyrics, but it's cliche

1st…d0ped0g can't really crit the master

9th…jurialmunkey another vague one that I can't evaluate, because I don't get it

8th…Subtledagger too dark for me

10th…Buzzrat kinda good, like a working picture almost

2nd…Pixiesfanyo good song, you bettered me, good work

6th... 6945 tired of critting, good song, not the best though

[buzzrat]

DFelon204409 8/10
RunAmokRampant 6/10
6945 6/10
I Am Vikingcore 5/10
addicted_tochaos 5/10
xKONRADx 5/10
d0ped0g 4/10
jurialmunkey 4/10
Subtledagger 3/10
Pixiesfanyo 3/10
buzzrat 1/10


is this ok -- hope so ,, dont want to get attacked by morrisey (he ****ing hates me)

[pixiesfanyo]

^ I like to know why I got last. And you should rank them.

can anyone take part in competitions? how does one enter???

[6945]

to enter...wait for challenge #80 to open. Write a song that includes the topic word. Thats it. If you want to enter #81 you will have to vote in #80. Check out the rules thread.

[DFelon204409]

I just finished my biology final and I'm going to vote tonight after my math review session.

ok cheers 6945

6945
dfelon204409
RunAmokRampant
I Am Vikingcore
addicted_tochaos
xKONRADx
d0ped0g
jurialmunkey
Subtledagger
Buzzrat
Pixiesfanyo

BEST 2 WORST
BEST AT THE TOP

when does 80 open?

1 6945
2 dfelon204409
3 RunAmokRampant
4 I Am Vikingcore
5 addicted_tochaos
6 xKONRADx
7 d0ped0g
8 jurialmunkey
10Subtledagger
9 Buzzrat
Pixiesfanyo