 |
| Music Reviews | Music News | Register | FAQ | Search | Today's Posts | Mark Forums Read |
|
||||||||
|
02-27-2004, 01:00 PM
|
#1 |
|
First Comes The Fire
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: Near Strabane (oh yeah!!!)
Posts: 802
|
Our new song, plz rate
This is our bands newest song. We've had good feedback from our friends, but i wanna know what u guys think....
Confessions of a tortured soul VERSE 1 What would the world be like If I was not here Would it destroy the smile Or would it draw a tear VERSE 2 It wasn’t always like this It wasn’t always so bad But now the demon has me trapped Why shouldn’t I be glad CHORUS But now its time for my confession That’s the reason I am here Among the crowds I am not heard I no longer live in fear VERSE 3 I stare at the beast in all in glory He stares back, doesn’t look away My eyes are burning, feel them closing But then I will not find the way TO ESCAPE!!!! |
|
|
|
02-27-2004, 01:47 PM
|
#2 |
|
Registered User
Join Date: Sep 2003
Posts: 241
|
I liked the rhyming and the flow of the lyrics, and I think it could be a decent song. I can't find really anything that needs to be altered much, good work.
|
|
|
|
|
02-27-2004, 05:40 PM
|
#3 |
|
Registered User
Join Date: Feb 2004
Posts: 108
|
Not bad. Would like to hear it.
|
|
|
|
|
02-27-2004, 06:13 PM
|
#4 |
|
GREAT GOOGA-MOOGA!
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Desolation Row, London
Posts: 16,337
|
The chorus and the final verse are good but I didn't really like the rest of the song. It was a bit boring.
|
|
|
|
|
02-27-2004, 06:57 PM
|
#5 |
|
ghostoryou
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: sydney
Posts: 6
|
these r pretty good lyrics and i think itd make a good song so i agree wit DrUmMeRoFaMaDmAn. good work
|
|
|
|
|
02-27-2004, 07:30 PM
|
#6 |
|
The Chosen
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Fûck Feûdalism
Posts: 1,876
|
dont get 'why shouldnt i be glad' at the end of the second verse. other than that pretty decent stuff.
|
|
|
|
|
02-27-2004, 07:32 PM
|
#7 |
|
LikeZombiesForTheFeeling
Join Date: Feb 2004
Posts: 789
|
I liked verse 1 & 2 a lot. then I hated the rest, work more on it. more imagery or better imagery. I would post examples but I don't like to rush the creator, he needs to create new things for himself.
|
|
|
|
|
03-24-2005, 06:44 PM
|
#8 |
|
First Comes The Fire
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: Near Strabane (oh yeah!!!)
Posts: 802
|
Lol this post is really old, but i thought id bring it back to see if any other ppl have any views on my lyrics
|
|
|
|
 |
| Thread Tools | |
| Rate This Thread | |
|
|
